Our Grand Adventure
Dec. 22, 2006
Issues of the Heart Part 2

I would like to start off by saying that I in no way have it all together in this area! This is just an area the Lord has been speaking to Lee and I in, here of late. I have made much improvments in this area but am still learning.

So, I left my last post with the questions of what does capturing our children's hearts look like, and how do we do this.

KEEP YOUR CHILDREN WITH YOU! I have found this to be so very important! We as a family no longer have our children go to Sunday school or Children's Church, they sit with us. We don't participate in activities that sperate us, such as homeschool co-ops where all the children are in different classes. Our children also don't socialize without us. For instance they don't go over to a friend's house to play. We socialize as a family. We invite entire families over to "play".  We want our children to think of these activities as family activities and see that it is so much funner having the whole family doing them. We don't want friends, Sunday School teachers, co-op classes to capture our childrens hearts. We want to be the center of their hearts. The bible tells us that foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. Well, when you get a bunch of foolish hearts together all you end up with is a bunch of fools! That is NOT what we desire for our children!

We have also found that keeping our children with us throughout the day at home makes a difference. Instead of having the children go play, I encourage them to play wherever I am. Now, this has been a struggle for me, I will admit. When I need to get something done, I want to roll up my selves and get down to business. But this is being selfish. I HAVE to put my selfishness aside! I have to realize it is more important that we have our children's hearts than the dinner gets done perfectly and quickly. One of the ways I have found this to work at dinner time is to rotate my helpers. Each day, one of the children gets to be my helper in the kitchen (on the 7th day, Daddy is my helper!). This gives them extra one on one time. The other children play, read, or such nearby often times on the floor of the kitchen.

I desire to sew, knit, do crafts, make our food from scratch and all such things. But the Lord has spoken to me that now is not neccissarly the time for these things. Because when I do these things, I want the children to go off and play. Now is the time for me to go off and play with them!

Keeping our children's hearts means investing in our children constantly. Now, I am not saying that children should be spoiled and have Dad and Moms attention all day long, at every wimper.  I am saying that we need to work with our children and play with our children. Just because we are home all day doesn't mean we are interacting with them. Doesn't mean that something else isn't getting their hearts. If they are off playing for hours, then whatever they are playing is going to capture their heart. Yes, our children have quite time. Yes, they have bed times. After they go to bed Lee and I have time to do our own things (blogging, reading, knitting, watching movies). I am not suggesting you don't do anything grown- up during the day. Sure I blog and do other stuff during the day, I just try to keep my children where I am instead of shooing them off. If I am on the computer, I have them do school work, play, read, crafts or whatnot in the same room. I interact with them, I look at what they are doing frequently and show an interest. No, it hasn't always been this way. There was a time that I would get on the computer for a couple of hours and tell the children to go play. Well, play they did. Even though I could hear them (pretty much) foolish things were happening!

Having our children respect us and love us is having their hearts. Our children desiring to be with us rather than to do any other thing is having their hearts. If your child could do their very favorite thing, would they want to do it with a friend, a sibling, or you? If it's not you, you probably don't have their heart. Ouch, huh? I know, I am speaking to myself here.

I don't feel like I am doing this subject justice. This is very important! Until a few years ago, I hadn't even ever thought about this. Then when I did hear about keeping our children's hearts, I agreed with what I was hearing, I believed it to be true. But, I didn't know how to get our children's hearts. So, I prayed! I continually asked the Lord to show me how to get my children's hearts, to give me ideas, to guide me. I also started praying the the Lord would turn Lee's heart toward our children. I see the fruit of these prayers and I continue to pray in this way.

Some resources I have found to be helpful in this area are: vision forum (they have an excellent cd series called Give Me Your Heart, Son that a friend recently loaned us and we are gleaming much from it!), Above Rubies magazine, Making it Home magazine, Steve and Teri Maxwell's ministry, a book titled Sheparding a Child's Heart, also my dear friend speaks of this on her blog and has recently, strivingforproverbs31 is her blog here on homeschoolblogger.

I pray that this will reach just one person and help them in some way.


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Comments

Dec. 29, 2006 - Untitled Comment

Posted by strivingforproverbs31


AMEN SISTER!


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Dec. 30, 2006 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Ruth


This is a very important subject. It is something I definitely need to work on. I need to keep my children with me more instead of sending them off to play while I do what I want to do.
Thank you for sharing your heart.
Ruth


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Dec. 31, 2006 - Hmm...

Posted by rachelle


...interesting thoughts. :-)


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Jan. 1, 2007 - Happy New Year!

Posted by Devonbunny


Wishing you much love and happiness for the coming year.

Love and Blessings
Jules x


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Feb. 1, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by lovinthosebunnies4Him


Oh this is soooo true. The time we invest in our children now will be so evident when they are grown. They will be more confident and be able to step out in boldness for Christ. We are all partnering together to raise up the next generation of godly arrows who love Him and keep His commands in order to further the kingdom 4 His Glory! Love your site.


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Mar. 5, 2007 - Disgusting

Posted by Anonymous


I am not sure how I found your blog, but I find your methods horrible. You remind me of this family that lives near here. The mother has the same mentality as you, and everyone in this small community sees this family as nuts.

The children do not know how to socialize with others at all. This family's daughter also just left. She is around 21 or 22 and was finally tired of this "cult" mentality. It is good she left the family but now she struggles to catch up on socializing skills and how to interact with the real world.

I'm hoping the rest of this woman's children are able to leave soon as well.

I am so glad that I grew up with a Christian mother, but I"m so thankful that I didn't grow up with someone like you. I would have ran away from home.


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