We live on a limited income and have for many years.  There was a time when I thought I had to have things to make me happy.  I have overcome that in recent years.  I have even moved to the other end of the spectrum.  I am getting rid of things more all the time.  There are some things I have come to realize about a cluttered home.  I know if I would listen to Flylady I could have learned this all sooner but to be honest with you I can't stand all that e-mail I feel I have to keep up with.  It adds to my stress more than helping my stress. 

One of the most profound things I have found to be true is, what I will call, the thinking factor.  When I am at school my brain works so much better than when I am home.  My brain is so much clearer when I am taking a walk or taking a shower, too.  It seems to function great when I am out and about or away from the mess but once I enter the front door it goes on "fog setting".  It seems that this house and all of it's clutter just suck the life right out of my brain and my body!  Basically, remove the clutter and clear my brain...  *hmmmmm*  Makes total sense to me!

So, this life that we live with all of it's comforts and abundance has become a complete hindrance to me instead of a help.  I suspect some of you can relate.  I find myself sinking into a pit from it all most days.  I have been working on it but there is still such a long way to go.  This "affliction of affluence" is something I think most of Americans struggle with.  We think because we have money or credit to buy things that we should buy things.  We think because we can volunteer or get involved in things we should fill our schedules to overflowing.  We think that every moment of every day should be filled and that we should multi-task our lives into overdrive.

I have done it... I have fallen for all of those lies many times.  I am cutting my schedule back some again and putting some things on hold to get this house in order and my life back on track.  I have gone back to Bible study and taken a break from things like garden club and church ministry on many levels.  I had to evaluate what was beneficial.  The garden club was more of a social club and I was not really learning much at the monthly meetings.  They were not providing educational lectures like I thought they would but instead they were having tea and going on field trips and such.  If I am not learning and growing from something my question then becomes, "Do I need that activity?"  Will I finish the Flower Show Schools?  If they will let me and time permits I will.  That will all have to be determined when I get to that place. 

There are other things that are draining on my life and I have to just let them go.  I need to be filled before I can be poured out.  I have made some people mad over it but my sanity is intact and my life is slowing down some again.  I still have school because that has been good for me.  I am still homeschooling three of my four children because it is still something God has called me to do.  I am making time to watch my oldest play football and play in band this year.  I am taking time to sit on the couch and read with my children.  I am taking time to garden and enjoy my family and my home.  I am taking that time to go to a solid Bible study.  I am making that time to continue to minister while I am in this church in the kitchen.  But... nothing else...  

Why is it that people think because I am home I do not do anything?  They think that I can just drag my kids around to attend all their meetings and that I should find a babysitter and just be with them.  Why do people feel that my time is their time?  Why does the way of the world dictate that to stay-at-home means to fill my day full of things for other people?  Can't I just STAY HOME???  Afterall, homeschooling and stay-at-home mothering is, in essence, an attempt to be AT HOME for the good of my family!

For me, it is not about giving things up.  It is about gaining time for what I love.  Right now the stuff is standing in the way of a life that I really love.  The demands of others has consumed my days.  No more!  I need to clear the clutter to be able to clear my head.  I need to free my time up that I have been spending on cleaning and trying to keep my head above water and, instead, use that time for things I enjoy or want to do.  I would have much more time for things like crocheting, sewing, reading and cooking if I did not have to deal with all the "stuff" in my life.  Our affluence and the idea that we must have things is really becoming the biggest hindrance in most of our lives.  I feel the call to a simpler life.  I have for a long time now.  As I step back and refocus things are beginning to look clearer all the time.  I want to move all the stuff out of the picture.  I want to wake up to a clean and simple life every day.  I want to set aside the stuff that so easily besets me.  I long for the things of this world to be left behind so that I might focus on the most important things... God, Dan and the children and the call upon my life that God has uniquely designed for me.  That is enough... don't ya think?

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