Aug. 5, 2009 - Do Good Books Always Come in Threes?
Perhaps I've bitten off more than I can chew, but I wanted to do my first ever book review, but do it for three books at once! Oh, and should mention that I'm not finished with any of these, but I already am enjoying them enough to say YOU TOO must add them to your "drop everything and read" list!
I have not talked much about my love of reading in this space, but I do. LOVE. to read.
I usually have at least one book going at a time, but sometimes two or three simultaneously. I was encouraged to read in my first book that that is not only permitted, but advisable, according to the suggestions for "Mother Culture" found in A Charlotte Mason Companion: Personal Reflections on the Gentle Art of Learning, by Karen Andreola.
As a mom who is very interested in Charlotte's approach, but has not yet mustered the time and energy to read little more than the briefest paragraph of Charlotte's original work, Andreola's book is a godsend. A great mix of personal stories, real-life examples and ideas, and just the right amount of quoting and original text have made this book a true page turner for me.
Though I am not using this book as part of a group study of discussion, the book is set up to easily be used that way, with discussion questions that help to draw the main points out of each chapter, and space for journaling and note-taking.
All this, and add to it, extremely reasonable chapter lengths. I find that I can read and absorb a chapter in probably 20 minutes time. Though, it could also be said, these chapters can (and will, by me!) be read again and again and something new culled each time from their depths.
Just one gem from the book, you ask? I'm more than happy to oblige. This is just a sentence or two from the chapter 'Living Books' -- for it was this concept that really drew me to the Charlotte Mason approach in the first place (even before I knew much about it): Living books have a certain amount of "play" in them. And just as "all work and no play make Jack a dull boy," all textbooks and no living books willl make Jack and Jill dull children. Their minds might have retained a few facts, but will their minds be livened-up, their imaginations warmed up, and their curiosity stirred up, to want to know more?
Next up on the reader's block....
Introduction to the Devout Life, by St. Francis de Sales
Have you ever read a saints work and thought, "Wow, I can totally see why THEY are a saint, and *I*, on the otherhand, am not!" Oh, me, me, me! Put aside those anxious imaginings when you pick up this wonderful text.
St. Francis de Sales, besides being a personal patron of mine (both IRL and on this here blog), is the patron of writers. And, for good reason. He is SO readable.
The book, addressed to a woman for whom he was spiritual director, walks the reader through a vast series of exercises to teach, and inspire true devotion to God.
Though, technically, I should be finished with this book to review it, I s'pose, but really -- I can't contain the excitement at the great and, in my opinion, APPROACHABLE resources found in this book. I say approachable not because they aren't also challenging, but they are things, ways of prayer, use of imagination, etc, that I can actually attempt to do. They are not so lofty that I can't even attempt them.
Here's an example of a gem you'll find, this one from the chapter entitled: Aspirations, Ejaculatory Prayers, and Good Thoughts, which gives many suggestions on how to remember God throughout your day, in interior motions: "Make spiritual aspirations to God by short, ardent movements of your heart,...Marvel at his beauty, implore his help, cast yourself in spirit at the foot of the cross, adore his goodness, converse often with him about your salvation, present your soul to him a thousand times during the day, fix your interior eyes upon his sweet countenance, stretch out your hand to him like a little child to his father so that he may lead you on, place him in your bosom like a fragrant bouquet, plant him in your heart like a flag..."
Last, but certainly not least, is the book dear TallDad and I have been reading together. We were averaging about a chapter per week and a half, and at this rate should finish the book in about two more months.
Dr. Gregory Popcak, Catholic psychotherapist, counselor, author, and general awesome husband and father (from what I gather listening to the radio show he and his wife, Lisa, host -- which I listen to on Ave Maria radio, as our local station doesn't carry it), has been an author I've enjoyed in several mediums. He frequently contributes to the Couple to Couple League natural family planning organization's magazine, Family Foundations, and has written several books that actually started TallDad and I on our 'reading aloud' journey together. You can read more about him at his website, exceptionalmarriages.com.
This book we're reading, The Exceptional Seven Percent: The Nine Secrets of the World's Happiest Couples" is a bit of a departure from his usual style, in that it is not overtly Catholic (not sure if I'm correct on this, but I think this was written in the late 90's. It was out of print for a little while, but I recently found it on Amazon.com again).
However, in true sneaky evangelization form (which I really do admire and practice myself in my writing) there is nothing in the book, at least that I have found thus far, that openly contradicts or goes against Catholic teaching. I think, with some imagination, an active, informed Catholic can see the Church truly shine through in this book.
Even if one is not interested in that, the book has great value as a marriage-building tool. It begins with an inventory, and overview, of the Nine Secrets. The couple is invited, through a series of easy quizzes, to examine where they are at. That was enlightening for TallDad and I -- if not fairly predicatable! But, that's ok. We look forward, especially, to reading (and re-reading) those chapters that can help us stretch and grow in areas where we particularly struggle, on our way to becoming not ship-wrecked, or conventional -- but truly EXCEPTIONAL!
Each chapter, after several overview/introductory chapters, examines a 'secret' of exceptional couples, and invites the couple reading the book to examine more in depth, through discussion and a quiz of some sort, to really see where they are, and what steps they need to take to better themselves and their marriage.
The idea centers around the creation of a marital imperative -- kind of a guiding principle, motto, mission statement -- for your marriage. That is what TallDad and I worked on this weekend. We didn't finish the exercise quite yet, but are looking forward to solidifying our concept of who we are, and subsequently, what our marriage is about.
The two-step process, of which we have completed step one, involves examining oneself as an individual -- what are you goals and dreams? Who do you want to be 'when you grow up'? I have to admit, I had to think about this quite seriously.
I firmly believe that, though TallDad and I are one, through the sacrament, God does not ordain that women 'lose their individuality and identity' in the sacrament! I need to remind myself of that sometimes. At times, it is hard to picture who I am apart from TallDad and the kids. The other extreme is to claim that individuality, as a woman, so much so that there is detriment to the marriage and family! So, like so many things in Catholic life, it is not either/or, but its Both/And.
The next step is examining each person's personal identity statement, and then melding that together, much as the 'two become one' in the sacrament, to create a marital imperative that supports the individuals, and the goals of the married couple. It is pretty darn cool.
Other things I appreciate about this book: It is not a 'feminist' or 'masculinist' text. It reflects well the complementarity of the sexes that the Church proclaims. Also, Dr. Popcak is just so darn funny -- it is a joy to read. It keeps our interest, we laugh out loud at certain points, and it helps to lighten the serious mood that 'marriage books' sometimes put out.
Add these three to your list, or, if you've already read 'em, tell me what YOU thought of the books!
