A Pollyanna Home
Jul. 7, 2007
When is a good time for children to move out?
Ds 18 is going to take his GED test today. God bless him. Now we haven't kicked him out when he turned 18 like some parents do. We wanted to get his feet wet and guide him as he makes his way into the world. He pays us rent, insurance, cell phone & gas. He has a job at Shopko. But, you all knew that was coming, he doesn't seem ambishes to do anything better then that. He is not college bound and that is o.k. but Shopko is a job for women who want to earn extra x-mas $ or teenagers in school. He stays out late with his friends. He has good friends but isn't there a point on how much time should be spent with them? He is also seeing a girl that is messed up. She is nice but not for him. We feel he is slaking in doing his chores around here. KTNies said it is good that he is still with us for guidance but if he isn't listen it doesn't do him a bit of good. He said he as to make his own mistakes. No he isn't getting into trouble but staying out late and getting to work on time is not responsible or doing his chores so-so. Granted I like having my children home with me but there is to a point where I get sick of the I am 18 game. Maybe this is Gods way of saying "He needs to grow up and find out things on his own." Some kids just have to learn the hard way. Doesn't the rest of the family deserve to be stress free also? Lets face it when they are home at any age we worry. We worry because we see them grow and make choices. And when they are home we correct those mistakes and advise them to do right. But when they are gone we worry less, to a certain degree. Because you know they come home. There just is something inside of me that is ready for him to go. I think it is the lifestyle that he is forming for himself. Which is good. He cleans his room by himself, washes his clothes and makes his own lunch for work. I don't have to tell him to do this he does this on his own. But it interferes my routine. I know my oldest DD has her routine. She has a home, husband, children and life that isn't the same as mine. If she lived with me there would be conflict because we do things diff. DS is starting to have that same change. I don't think he realizes how it affects us. He seems like he is afraid to do better. He is too comfortable with this but wants some freedom. Well that doesn't jive at midnight and we are sleeping and he comes in and wakes us up. He tries to be very quite but this is the worry part. We don't sleep well because he isn't home. Well he is either home at 11:00 or he gets locked out and sleeps in his truck. That has happened already. You just never think that time will come to let go until it sneaks up on you. Last year I never even thought about him leaving but now that is all I think of. Does this make me a bad mother? I really don't feel guilty about it. I have raised my son to be a good young man and he has. Some of his choices need to improve but he isn't headed for a life of crime either. God has something up his sleeve I just wish I knew what it was.

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Jul. 7, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Anonymous


You should be thankfull for him not being in trouble and being able to spend time with him and help him through these next difficult years. He needs you now in order for him to stay true to himself. He seems like a great yound man and is not doing anything out of the ordinary. Stay with him and guide him but you need to let him lead his own life. Most parents would love to have a son that does his own laundry. You have done a great job so far and God has more for you to do with him, stay with him.


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Jul. 30, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by ericaand3kids


Hey there I just wanted to share my 2cents! =) I personally think kicking a child out is a big thing, though I understand there could come a time for that. I feel like one of the most important things about the parent/children relationship is unconditional acceptance. That being said maybe you can sit down and talk to him so that he has a goal date to work toward, if he has no motivation on his own. Not kicking out but ya know I want to give you a year to save money so you are able to get a nice place of your own, or something like that? But if he moves out sometimes that gives some children freedom they are not ready to handle. Either way pray about it and don't let up! Hope God brings you peace on the issue. God BLess!


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