I know its a pity party - really, I do.  But, I just am in a season of feeling overwhelmed.  I look around and see nothing but God's blessings - good health, awesome kids, great husband, nice house, paid off vehicle.  What could I possibly have to be down about?  First of all, I have been trying to get up AHEAD of my kids in order to spend time reading and having my quiet time.  This is no easy task.  First of all, I am NOT a morning person - at least not an early morning person.  The earlier I get up, the earlier my kids get up. My 5 year old refuses to stay in bed in the morning.  If it is 5AM or 6AM.  Once he hears me or my husband up - he is up and ready to go - wanting breakfast, wanting to talk, talk, talk.  My husband doesn't mind it so much, but it drives me crazy!  Then, the baby wakes up - because they share a room.  Then our 3 year old hears the commotion and guess what??  "Mooommmmy, I'm awake!"  as loud as she can manage.  And then, before you know it - I have been up an hour ( the hour I had intended to spend with God) and I have changed the baby, made him a bottle, put him back down, scolded my 5 y.o., tried to get him back to bed without re-waking the baby, had a complete power struggle, tried to be pleasant with my hubby, taken my 3 y.o. to potty, gotten her fed and now - its too late for QUIET TIME.  My husband is gettting ready to go out the door...and poof our day has begun.  And to my sadness, it has not started out the way I intended.  Instead of my children waking to a peaceful, sweet mommy, they are getting up to a grouchy and irratated one!  Instead of smiles, I greet them with a stern "SHHH!" or "Get back into bed."  So, do I really have to get up at 4AM in order to have time alone with God?  Surely, not - that seems like punishment!!  So, we start our day off this way and my attitude is bad or sad.  This mornign I just sat here and cried as I just wanted to get up and have a Quiet Time and I feel so defeated. 

Then, of course, there is the whole new to homeschooling thing.  My son is doing great, but I find that I am irratated easily when we try to do the work.  We do a lot of coloring, cutting, etc. and it takes forever.  He has no sense of time - i.e. - if we are coloring a picture, it could take him up to 20 minutes.  He is just taking his sweet time.  Therefore, dragging out very simple lessons so that for me, it becomes tedious.  I have tried setting the timer and he hates that and it forces him to 'hurry' and do a sloppy job.

We finally just took the diapers away from my 3 yo.  She is wearing big girl panties and does fine with tee-tee, but poops in them at least once a day.  I know, I know, someone out there is thinking - she's just not ready, you did it too soon, etc. etc.  Well, that is not the case here.  I know her - this is an issue of obedience ( or disobedience) and her choosing to do this. 

The baby is awesome.  Growing like a weed, sleeping well, eating well.  Ahhh, but entering into the stage of SEPARATION ANXIETY!  He is rarely with a sitter, so he is extremely attached to me - go figure. He just screams when I leave the room to do some house work.  He is much too heavy for me to carry him around and I know this is just a stage, but wow, overwhelming.

Then there are my two precious step-daughters.  They are coming home tomorrow after being at mom's for two weeks in a row.  Major transition time.  Mom is not a believer from what i can tell and her home is very, very different than ours.  She is going through a divorce and moving out.  The girls act as if this is not big deal, but come on - of course it is!

OK - and so, I want to exercise!  I NEED to exercise!!  None of my clothes fit - still - even though the baby is already one.  Very disheartening and we certainly don't have the money to go out and get new ones.  Exercise requires time.   Anyone have some extra they can give me?

So now, if you, or anyone is reading this, you must be thinking what a pitiful woman!  I know I should just change my perspective, but today that is hard.  I am just overwhelmed.  Thanks for listening...

I count on the Word that says,

Posted by 2boysmom

As I was reading your post I was re-living my days of having very young children. That's exactly what my kids did (and my 8 yr. old still does - especially since the time change).
Please don't give up on having your kids at home, like some do. Just recognize the season you're in and enjoy it. God knows you have young (there's a verse about this) and so don't let guilt take you down either.
Here are some tips: work with each child in regard to the area of frustration you mentioned in your post. If it takes your boy 20 min. to do his assignment - that's the perfect time for you to walk away and read to the others or do some housework. Train your little one (a little at a time) to be in a different room than you by using his crib or a baby gate. He won't die and you will be training him to be separated from you in a controlled environment. When my kids were little I wanted to do my devotions in the morning but I had to settle for the afternoon. After lunch put them all down for naps or mandatory quiet time. Grab a cup of coffee and your Bible and spend some time with the Lord. If your kids call out to you - give them an extra 5 minutes of quiet time. It won't be easy at first but if you can get them to respect your authority and your time, it will be worth all the tears - yours and theirs.
I hope you have a great day! (sorry this is so long)