Feb. 9, 2010 - Margin in my Day

One of the things that I learnt (the hard way) last week was that my days had no margin.  Margin is that left over space in any area of our life - our time, our energy, our money, our emotions, our space.  When we have no margins – we are totally spent.  Last week I found myself ‘intense’ by 8.30am – that is ½ hour into our studies!  My focus was on getting it all done – that is, on the product (a completed to-do list) as opposed to the process (discipleship / training my children.)

We can fill our days with good stuff, good curriculum, good projects, good books but is it the best for this moment in time?

This week has been different for me; partly because I tweaked our routine and partly because I have got my actions back in line with my beliefs (discipleship vs education). 

• Plan margin.  When we swap from one activity to another (whether it is play-dough to dollhouse or moving from math to science) there is always ‘down time’.  It takes time to pack up, put things away and get ready for the next thing.  We need to plan for this.  It is a realistic thing that happens all the time – we need to expect it and work with it.  (The alternative is that nothing gets put away and that doesn’t work!!)  On a study routine this looks like a lesson goes for 20 minutes leaving 5 minutes pack up etc, and 5 minutes margin.  That margin is always taken up – someone will have a question, toddler needs attention, the phone rings, a mess is made, toilet stops need to happen.  If we don’t plan on these things happen then we will get further and further behind our plan and we will feel guilty.  This guilt will make us drive the kids harder or give up all together.  There has to be a happy mid-way.  It is called planning margins.

• Use large blocks of time – when I micro plan my day (in ½ hour blocks) I get in a tizz real quick.  I prefer to work in 1-2 hours of time and have a list of what can be achieved in that time.  My list may well be 4 things making it appear to be 4x 1/2hours but there is a difference going on in my heart.   When I have ½ hour blocks I’m inclined to be driven by the clock.  When I have a to-do list to achieve in 2 hours I flow from one activity to the other.  Because I make my plans realistic as possible most times I plan 2 hours worth of work.  Sometimes we go over, sometimes we finish earlier.  This doesn’t mean I’m not aware of time (we need to use our time wisely) but I’m not driven by the ½ hour.

• Be flexible – When stuff happens, either interruptions or when things don’t go as planned, we need to hold our plans lightly and be flexible.  The first thing to being flexible is to know your priorities.  When interruptions come, or plans need to change we can make room for the priorities and let go of the other stuff.  If we don’t know our priorities, everything becomes important – or worse – urgent!!  One reason we do our Devotions and Bible Study first up in our day is if stuff happens, we have already worked on the important things on our list and we have the freedom to be flexible.

Two days into this week and we have had to make changes each day.  But I can reflect back on both Monday and Tuesday and say they were productive, successful days.  How come?  Because

1. We maintained peace and harmony in relationships (top-top goal)
2. We were able to achieve, on both days, the top priorities in both life skills and studies and accept that there were things left undone.

Feb. 9, 2010 - Monday's Highlights

My lunch date was with a friend who is well trained in teaching mathematics.  Her current job is teaching teachers to teach math.  Or maybe she teaches the trainers to teach the teachers….. either way she knows her math!!  It is always inspiring to talk to her – she has such a way of making math meaningful and painting a context/purpose for studying math.  I shared with her many of the living math books that I have bought over the years (I brought them with me just in case we got to talking about math! LOL).  It was very encouraging for her to be thrilled with my collection and to write a few titles down.  It was reassuring that I am doing good stuff with the kids.

I am really pleased with the work that the children achieved today.

Josh worked with lawn mowing today.  He was pretty whacked when he got back and then he went to Bootcamp (fitness group) so he didn’t put in any study today.

Jess worked on her bible study (Heart of Wisdom unit on Wisdom) piano, history and reading all independently.  She then had Science with me which included some independent notebooking.

Nomi had Bible study, Australian History and Science with me, which all included notebooking and then she worked on Math, piano, reading, and art by herself.  She also wrote an email to a friend.

Daniel also had Bible study, Australian History and Science with me and then notebooked those lessons independently.  He also worked on Math, art and photography by himself.  Daniel also has a one and half hour routine of occupying himself:  free computer, reading and playing in his room by himself.  There were a few activities I had planned for Daniel that he didn’t get to but that is okay – the goal is to keep occupied and to learn rather than to complete a list of activities.

I talked with a friend on the phone about parenting stuff this afternoon.  We talked a lot about giving the kids choices, what does obedience look like and getting the kids to do chores.  In reflecting over that conversation one of the things that strikes me is that we need to know why we do things as a parent.  Why do I expect obedience?  Why do I expect my children to do chores?  Why?  Plus we need to have a long-term view of our parenting - we aren't fixing irritating issues today - our training is for the long term growth of our children that they may stand tall in their generation in days to come.

I really put my foot in it with my kids this evening.  I had to take Josh into town for his fitness group so I had cooked dinner early (with Daniel as he is my cook’s helper this week) and asked the kids to get the house ready for this evening’s meeting while I was gone.  When I came back the house was all done but they hadn’t got to my salad yet so I said I’d make the salad and then we’d have dinner.  I made the salad and sat down to eat – the kids just looked at me…. “Where’s our dinner?”  I had forgotten to serve their dinner!  Oops.

Feb. 8, 2010 - Our First Sunday

Jess was on “Children’s Talk”:  A 5 minute lesson for the kids given at the front of the church during the service.  After that the bulk of the children upto 12yo go out for Kids @ Church (Sunday School).  Jess gave a talk taken from the Character First Elementary Series on sensitivity though she had to condense it for the time frame she had.  She did very well. 

Josh was on the sound desk and though we were running late and he didn’t have time to do most of his checks thanks to there being others who can do it now (he was the only one there for a while) it all went well through the service.

We helped the lady who was on morning tea, talked to lots of people and came home.

Once home we all go into relax mode, usually watching a dvd.  But I had things to do so the kids went their own way and I locked myself in the office, coming out occasionally for food!  I wanted to tweak our study routine and get prepared for the coming week.  As it turned out I tweaked the routine twice, so it took most of the afternoon, but I am happy with the results.  I feel that there is more breathing room, more margin now.  I have dropped a few ‘ideals’ as well as a subject or two.  Reality is we wouldn’t have done them anyway, so why have them on the routine.  I want the paper goals to be as realistic as possible, a reflection of what really goes on here, not an unrealistic goal that looks great on paper but has no truth in it and just makes me feel like we aren't achieving (when we no doubt do).

Feb. 7, 2010 - our First Saturday

Saturday morning has a routine just like any other day though it is focused around getting our chores done, getting the house ready so we can relax and have a day off on Sunday.

The kids wake up have breakfast, regular chores and then they need to finish off any extra chores that they didn’t finish during the week (this is deeper cleaning in their area of responsibility).  Then there is “Bedroom Bless” where they do a weekly clean in their bedrooms from airconditioner, fans, windows, fingerprints, change sheets, sweep floor and general tidy up.  They also need to iron their clothes for Church tomorrow. 

Depending on what is happening in our weekend the plan is that they would have 1 hour thereabouts of table time.  This is mainly to catch up on anything that wasn’t done during the week.  If the younger ones have more than an hour of work to do then it gets done next week, if the older ones have more than an hour to do then they assess what is important in order for them to stay on track. 

This Saturday our focus time (table time) was spent preparing for the concert.

The concert went very well – we think it was our best concert yet.  It seemed as if everyone just wanted to have a fun entertaining time rather than performing at a school concert.  Our goal has always been to have a family concert and each year we get closer to that atmosphere – it was great.

We did a few different item pieces.  One that involved the whole family was singing a musical style song.  We got the idea from this YouTube clip.  My kids love this song.  Unfortunately I woke up this morning singing it – and it is still going through my head!!  We tweaked bits to make it fit our situation.  Unfortunately we don’t have very many photos – maybe some of our friends took some.

Nomi and Jessica took the main singing parts.

Joshua came in and tried to convince us all that he wanted to show us all that he could dance (for those who’ve seen the clip – he was the janitor)

I sang the mum bit – yes, I sang a 2 line solo piece in front of people – the things I do for my kids!

Daniel sang the security guard piece – and he did very very well.  Each word was said very clearly.

Naomi read a story she wrote though she added sound affects from Powerpoint to enhance the action.  This photo shows her controlling the sound as she told her story.

After the concert we had a simple BBQ together, the kids played in the rain and adults had time to catch up.  It was a great family night.

Feb. 6, 2010 - What I learnt this Week

This week was our first week back into our study routine.  I decided to blog about each day in order to introduce our routine and our curriculum/resource choices for this year.  But there was also an element that blogging gives me the time and space to sort out my thinking and reactions to our day.

I struggled at the beginning of the week, a bit tense over how much I had planned to do in each day, stressed because we had no margin. And then towards the end of the week, though I still need to tweak our routine, I realised that life does happen and I am okay with laying aside what was planned and doing what is important. The familiar saying comparing the urgent with the important has been good to reflect on this week. I certainly want to focus on what is important – each hour of the day.

Last year we had 1 hour where everyone (except Josh) was working on their discipline studies (they are different for each student but cover the subjects that need daily practice).  This gave me an opportunity to catch up with at least one of the kids as well as teaching Daniel reading/writing.  This year I had planned for these things to be done spasmodically through our day – and it didn’t work too well.  The children couldn’t get their teeth into independent work and I didn’t know where anyone was at, at any given time.  So this weekend I tweak our routine to make sure that we have 1 hour of discipline studies all happening at the same time.

I also learnt that ½ hour isn’t long enough for some lessons.  It is plenty long enough for the discipline studies, in fact some of them only last 15-20minutes but the lessons that involve reading, talking and recording – they need an hour. One in particular that needs to be tweaked is our Living Math lesson.  I know that there are many supporters of short lessons but I wonder how age appropriate that is.  As our kids get older they need to be able to focus for longer than 20 minutes.  So I am pleased that this has come to my attention and I will do a little tweaking.

This leads to my biggest struggle though – ½ hour lessons means we can do more subjects, but maybe not do them as well.  So if I am to give them 1 hour we can’t do as many subjects – which ones to drop?

This is where my workshop time comes in and I think I’ll tweak that too.  Instead of doing a little bit in many subjects over a long period of time, I think we’ll do a bigger bit, in few subjects over a short period of time.  Eg.  We may focus on Living Math this term, and Logic next.  Take a seasonal approach rather than a year long study.  I know I’ve had these thoughts before but in the flurry of planning and writing routines these good thoughts get lost!  It takes living it out and tweaking for the good stuff to come to the surface! 

Feb. 6, 2010 - Our First Friday

We started our day off with our Character studies at 8.30am.  We viewed a short dvd clip and then tried to find a way to simplify the 5 I wills into 5 words and an image (clip art).  The girls worked together to try and find the clip art, then they made a notebook page – We’ve simplified Sensitivity to:  watch, listen, understand, empathy (Just thought that ‘feel’ would have been a better word) and Act.

I intended to teach another Character lesson this morning but at this point my friend in town needed my help again so I quickly organised everyone to be able to work independently for the morning.  The kids listed what they accomplished in their diaries:

Josh – Josh was going to mow lawn today (I took him up to the property but the lawn is still too soggy-wet to mow, so he came home which he was kind-of please with as he wasn’t feeling too good) He then focused on his studies in the morning (math, writing, reading) but took the afternoon easy.

Jess – character + notebook page, plus helped Daniel with his notebook page and blog, then while Daniel worked independently she focused on piano practice, math, and prepared the kids talk (for Church on Sunday)

Nomi – character + notebook page, math, blog, piano, concert practice, drawing

Daniel – character + notebook page, math, reading and note taking, blog, drawing, Lego

I came home early afternoon – well after lunch.  Nomi made me a salad while I freshened up – it was a stinker of a morning and I was driving around town with no aircon in my car!    The girls and I sat down to watch another Christy movie (sigh!  We have no self control… we just want to get the series over and done with so we can get on with life!! LOL) 

The boys though spent their time productively – they sat down together to work on a model aeroplane each.  This is a new hobby for Daniel and a revived one for Josh as he set out to teach and help Daniel.  

We also practiced our few concert items for tomorrow’s homeschool concert.  This is our first get together for the year and it is always such fun – we are looking forward to it.  I must prepare a character lesson though for the whole group (usually we divide into U10 and 10+ but a the concert we do it all together – as the opening concert piece)

Nomi is cooking Pizza from scratch for the first time.  She has chosen ham and pineapple for one and Chicken and BBQ sauce for the other.  Friday night is traditionally a movie night in our house – we mostly try and watch one that the whole family will enjoy.  Hence the pizza for dinner – pizza and movie – a family tradition!

Feb. 5, 2010 - Our First Thursday

It was dark and drizzling this morning so we all felt like it was deepest winter where we all wanted to stay in bed. But of course it is the middle of summer! It was the dark clouds and airconditioner fooling us!!  We usually go grocery shopping early Thursday morning but I decided we didn’t need to so we didn’t have to leave home till 8.00am to get the girls to Mainly Music.  (We are usually at the shops by 7.15am so the girls can help before they go to Mainly Music.)

Jess has been on the committee for Mainly Music for a few years now and it is a terrific opportunity for her.   This year is the first year for Nomi to join the team as a helper.  It takes up the whole morning every Thursday.

We had a series of little things that happened that made us pause later in the day and reflect on how God works things together.  I had become aware of a friend who needed help this morning and I was going to look after my friend’s (MC) children so she could help the other friend.  But those plans changed and I wasn’t needed.  Joshua usually mows lawn on Thursdays but it was raining so he was not working.  He wanted to buy a model plane and since I was only going to be brief in town I let him come with me instead of staying home to study.  We get into town, drop off the girls and realise that the other friend who was going to help MC was no longer available to help which meant MC was working by herself.  It was obvious that we needed to stay in town and pitch in with the need at hand.  So here it was – I was free and Josh was free and we were all in town.  Isn’t God good!

I just love the feeling of being free to give up my plans and help someone.  Then to have my children work along side of me is a thrill too. 

Josh took Daniel shopping with him - Josh was looking for a model plane to do along side a model plane Daniel is ready to work on.  They then walked to the library till I was done with my town chores.

We were all feeling fairly exhausted (first day back and Mainly Music is always a tiring day). So the girls and I watched “Christy” all afternoon (Yes!  I know….all afternoon!!!).  Nomi has been on cook’s helper this week and has done most of the meals by herself which has been a great accomplishment and a boost to her confidence in the kitchen.

Thursday night is our mid-week Bible study group.  Last year Josh and Jess began to come along and they participate well.  This week Jessica is leading the study and she has chosen Nehemiah as our character/topic.

Feb. 4, 2010 - My Internet Reading

Here are some of the links and ideas that I’ve been reading about lately.

Why Homeschoolers need an ipod or mp3 player from Heart of  Wisdom.  Robyn links some good resources here.   Our children have an mp3 but they rarely use them.  They have been given very strict guidelines as I don’t want them to grow up with earphones connected, regardless of what good stuff they may have on their mp3.  They need to ask to use it, and only if it is appropriate for them to be listening to stuff by themselves is the answer yes.  As it has turned out they enjoy listening to stuff together most of the time (though Joshua would often listen to things that the others weren’t interested in.)  But these links are fantastic and I have been prompted to update our audio library -  the stories we own have been listened to over and over and over again – time for a few more new ones.

Looking at Mini Offices has been an aspect of preparing our kids for the start of their studies for 2010.  I have decided to not do a lapbook style mini-office but rather a notebook style (ie in a binder).  At this stage these types of prompts will be in their Control Journal.  One place for everything.  At the moment Daniel has a phonics prompt and word bank style dictionary, and the others have writing prompts from the Excellence in Writing programme. 

Though Christmas is well and truly over this post held me riveted – did the angels sing?

A blog post to make me stop and think about what is important – Dear Mom, Thank you

I plan to use the Outdoor Challenges this year so reading this Blog Carnival was inspiring..

Secret Servant of the week – what a wonderful idea.  One that I could adopt in my own life, even if I don’t present it to the family.

Feb. 4, 2010 - Our First Wednesday

I began today looking forward to all that was going to happen – Wednesday is our STAY AT HOME DAY.  Yay…

We started with our family devotions – we continue to read through Ephesians and pray together.

Then I had a long conversation with Joshua on time management and his control journal.  The thing is, his life isn’t that complicated that he needs a full on time management system but when is there a better time to learn a skill than when it isn’t stressed out situation.  We talked about him growing up and having to be more responsible for all aspects of his life – not just his study.  He will have family commitments, studies, work, a social life, and any ministry opportunities all colliding and he needs to start to learn the skills to help keep them all in balance now.  He continues to work on his control journal to make it his own – to reflect how his brain works, and how it needs to be reminded.

Then we had character lesson.  We talked about the five I wills  – I will listen to others fully, I will watch facial expressions, I will notice tone of voice, I will put myself in other’s shoes, I will show that I care.  These are the practical out-workings of sensitivity and one of the reasons I like Character First so much.  Then we did something we haven’t done before – I gave each of my children a different handout (produced by Character First).  Josh had the Business Bulletin, Jess had the Advanced Student, Nomi had the Intermediate student and Daniel had the Elementary student handouts.  Each read the article that reviewed the 5 I wills and then ‘responded’ in the form of a notebook page to one of the questions printed at the bottom on their article.  Daniel came with me (the others worked independently) and we talked some more about a situation he was in with his friends and how that connected to sensitivity. His response / notebook page was more of a lapbook fold representing that when people hurt in their bodies we use our 5 senses to help, but when they hurt in their heart we need to use our heart to be sensitive.  Daniel and Nomi also draw a Snowshoe rabbit (Copy draw) and copywrite the definition.  I was really pleased with using these extra bulletins and will use them again that way.

Daniel and I then had Science together.  We started with the Answers in Genesis programme:  God’s Design for Life.  We are starting with Plants because I want Daniel to help with a veggie garden in a few months time.  I was really happy with today’s lesson – as a new resource it was easy to prepare for (I became familiar with the layout and photocopied a worksheet).  The lesson included a section of information to read, a worksheet  and a discussion point (which we turned into a notebook page). 

Then it was time for our Australian History studies again with Nomi and Daniel.  We continue to read the Australia Book.  This is really stirring up their interest.  Nomi wants to write a story based on the Tom Thumb, a small boat used by early explorers, Bass and Flinders.  Daniel just wants to learn as much history as he can.   Reading aloud always sends me to sleep so after about 40minutes I needed to nap!  The kids went off to find all the picture books we have on early Australian history and do some reading themselves.

When I woke up it was time for science with Jess and Nomi.  This is their second lesson this week.  We thought they understood the experiment so we were just going to talk about it and move on but they didn’t so today’s lesson was all about the experiment, what happened and why.  Our objective with science is to give the girls an overview – not to necessarily finish the course within a year so we will just take whatever time we need to take.  (I keep reminding myself of this)

Meanwhile Daniel is working on his Photo of the Day project (which isn’t anything like a photo of the day project!)  Let me explain…. I saw a scrapbook album done last year, taking one photo a day of regular life and objects.  I loved the idea.  I had hoped that Daniel would take on this project merging his love and skill in photography with his need for consolidating his writing.  As it has turned out he isn’t taking this on himself and our life isn’t consistent enough for him to be taking a photo a day.  So my plans have changed slightly.  He is to do one page a week – that is between 1-4 photos.  He is using Creative Memories Storybook software which is so very simple for him to use.  I have set up a template for him, he chooses a page layout (from the different template options I’ve given him), he drags in the photos and writes a few sentences for each one.  He can save the project and he is done.  So other than remembering to do it – it is an independent activity. Daniel also worked on his independent math (Math-U-See).

Just before lunch I helped Jess with her math and ended up having a big discussion with her as well.  It is taking time for these heart to hearts that I am feeling challenged that my scheduled lessons are pushing out – and yet today I am having them so it is really just relaxing and letting real life be my guide in balance with what is planned on paper.

In the afternoon Jessica began preparing a Bible study as she is leading at our weekly Bible Study.  Naomi spent her time on reading and notebooking.  Daniel has half hour blocks of table time, computer time, reading time and play time.  Josh continued with whatever he had planned.

At 4.00 we stopped whatever we were doing and spent a little time in practice for the concert and then it was free productive time for the rest of the afternoon.

Feb. 3, 2010 - Our First Tuesday

The morning started out of whack because of some extra family projects we had to work on.  By 8.30 we sat down for a moment of prayer – and to calm my emotions!

Daniel couldn’t wait for study time today – in fact he started early!  Yesterday A.BB sent him a few books – one on lions and one on sharks and he can read them!!!  Oh this is so exciting it needs a post of its own to celebrate.  He has been reading and copywriting facts down in his reading journal!!  Yay!! He has been so waiting for this day.  I wanted to get a science lesson in with Jess and Nomi early this morning so this activity kept Daniel’s focus.

The girls and I sat down to discuss what my plans are for Science for them this year.  We are going to do Apologia General Science together and I am going to read it aloud.  This is a complete change from what we have done in the past but we feel it will suit both girls and it would be a good thing for me to be involved as well.  Daniel will work on some different science with me in another time slot, on another day.

We are going to use Knowledge Box Central lapbook/notebook as a guide to our recording.  So our plan is to read the text, to talk about anything we need to as we go along, and then to do the recording – as per the study guide questions – independently.  The girls aren’t sure about the lapbooking – so they may tweak the lapbook prompts to notebook pages and use the graphics etc to illustrate their pages.  We will see what works for them.

We then had to jump in the car and head off for the girls piano lessons.  Our piano teacher goes to another homeschool family’s house and we join them there.  While Jess has her piano lesson I take all the kids from both families for a Character lesson and then the younger set for a living math lesson.

As I said yesterday we are studying sensitivity, so today we talked about using all our senses to collect enough information about how a person is really doing.  We also talked about “putting ourselves in another persons shoes”.  I asked a 7yo what were the senses and he mentioned the heart – he was so spot on…. God has given us our heart to be able to use to observe how people are doing – often we miss that.  Good lesson.

The older girls went and did some independent study and then Nomi had her piano lesson.  Meanwhile I had a living math lesson with the boys (7yo, 5yo, and my Daniel at 10yo).  We read a story about chance and probability, played around with a few hands on examples and that was that!  The boys each understood something about what we were talking about.  It is a good group to work with – I enjoy it.

Then I had a nice visit with my friend – we haven’t seen much of each other since we’ve both  been family focused with all that happens in  December / January around here so it was  a nice catch up. 

We were tempted to stay for lunch but decided a swim and then back home was the best thing to do.  Only thing was we stayed so long in the pool – we may as well had lunch!! 

Once home we spent a little time with Peter / daddy and then worked on some independent studies – math, reading, writing etc (each child had a different priority to work on.)  I had some writing to do and needed to focus on that.

Later in the afternoon we practiced our concert item/s.  Then I sat down with the girls to watch a  Christy video, Daniel had a dvd on the computer (he only watches Christy if he has to!) and Josh kept on with his studies.

Which reminds me - in my reporting of yesterday (and today) I haven’t said anything about Josh.  That is because he is pretty much totally independent in his studies and he is not on my “to do list”.  He joins us with character studies but the rest of the time he works by himself conferring with me when he needs to.  He has been working on math, science, Latin, blogging/writing, and reading several different books:  The Fallacy Detective, Money Matters for Teens, Prayer by Phillip Yancy, An Authentic Life (Francis Schaeffer).

Today he also spent time putting a control journal together.  (Read my previous post).  I presented to Josh the idea and gave him several different models (Jess has her way, I’ve made on for Daniel and I have my own personal binder) and he was to think about how it would best work for him.  The goal is for him to manage his time and his many studies, projects and responsibilities.  He decided to go more for my model which includes a diary/to do list in the control journal.  As part of him setting this up he is re-setting the assignment sheet to a form that will help him.  I am very pleased with this.  The first step in any system is making it your own (plus he gets experience at working with Excel!)   

Today was good – I had to tweak as I went along, I had time to talk/conference with Josh though there are things from last years routine that are missing and it is becoming obvious we need to them bring back.  Keep tweaking!

Feb. 2, 2010 - Our First Monday

This week is our first week back to our study schedule and instead of just posting my plans I thought I would post how each day went, introducing our resources and plans along the way.

Family Devotions

We start our day at 8.00 with Family Devotions.  At the moment we are Reading through Ephesians.  We read a portion each day, talk about it and pray together.

Since today was our first day back we spent a little time catching up with our new routine and setting up control journals.  (More on control journals later in the week as we test them out.)

Character Studies

We are studying character back together as a whole family this year.  The older children have been doing it on their own and though they have learnt plenty it had become an academic subject to them rather than a discipleship, life changing subject.  Today we started Sensitivity.    (We had a big laundry to do today so we all helped hang out a few loads instead of doing any notebook work with Sensitivity.)

Workshops:

On Monday I have 2 hours of interactive teaching / learning with Jess, Nomi and Daniel.  These are subjects that are easy to get squeezed out of our plans, and yet bring a level of interaction and co-operative learning which is good.

On Saturday the local homeschool co-op has their yearly concert – it has been a tradition to start the year’s activities with a family concert on Saturday afternoon / night so Dads can come along.  It is a highlight.  So today we went searching for something to do as a family.  We had a ball as we read some really stupid skits (my family are not allowed to use the word ‘stupid’ but this was honestly the name of the website!!).  We laughed so hard we cried!  We eventually came up with a few items that we will give a go.  Can’t tell more just now – maybe next week!

We would usually move onto Auslan (sign language) next but we decided, since we only have a week to get the concert organised, to spend that time working on the scripts. The girls worked on that together.  This year they will be doing more and more together – it is good to see their relationship growing and enjoying doing things together.  It usually ends up in a giggle!!  Meanwhile Daniel and I did his LEM Phonics together.  He read 4 pages from his reader really smoothly with about 1 word a page he needed guidance with. 

More washing to hang.

Living math - We are reading The Great Number Rumble.  Today we read about the math in music.  To do a little hands on they cut up a piece of music and rolling the dice to select which note to chose, piecing it back together again in a random order.  Apparently this has been done before in the history of music-making.  Jessica played the original and then played the new piece for the others.  They really enjoyed this activity.  Mathematically we were really working with chance / probability - I will continue with this topic over the next week with Daniel one on one.

We then squeezed in ½ hour of reading the Australia Book as we being our Australian Book Traveller unit before lunch.  That was disappointing – that we only got ½ hour.  But I’ll read more maybe over lunch tomorrow.

After lunch the kids maintained a focused routine with subjects such as math, music, reading and writing. 

I am already seeing a glitch in my scheduling – it is too tight – I am squeezing too much in.  What to do?  Oh well, this week is about seeing how it goes, taking notes and making changes at the end of the week – so we can give it a shot again next week!

Jan. 25, 2010 - Cleaning Routines

On one of the social networks I belong to answered a question about getting into a cleaning routine.  I thought I would share my thoughts here too:

Daily I try and do:
* make my bed (not very good at this!!)
* provide good food - 3 meals a day
* dishes
* clean bathroom bench and toilet
* sweep the floor
* at least one load of laundry
* pick up stuff at the end of the day

Weekly my important things are
* wipe down stove, polish the kitchen sink
* scrub shower, clean mirrors
* fingerprints, aircon filters
* dust
* mop the floor
* clean out fridge
* do a weekly grocery shop

Monthly
* Change sheets (I actually do this fortnightly - alternating different rooms)
* deep clean bedrooms

* clean airconditioners if not done recently
* Windows for living areas (I don't do bedrooms so often)

These are my basic basics - what I aim to have done even during busy times.  I actually have more on my lists but these things are my priorities the rest happen when it happens – some times regularly and other times rarely!  That is just the seasons of life.

I do try and deep clean one room a week – but this can easily be skipped depending on what else is going on  in life.  Of course the longer it doesn’t get done the bigger the job eventually becomes but if I can’t get to it – life doesn’t fall apart.

I have three chore times a day - this is well established in our family routine.
* After breakfast
* After Lunch
* Before dinner (and then dishes after dinner)

The kids help me - and have done so since they were about 3yo.  When they learn a new chore we go through a training time.  Initially they work with me and then I supervise and it isn’t till I know that they know how to do it do I leave them on their own to work.

Stick to your schedule - If I don't get something done on the day I've planned I don't squeeze it into tomorrows list - it waits it's turn till next week's designated day (but it becomes a priority). Of course there are sometimes where it needs to be done tomorrow but routine, regular cleaning I do on the designated days as much as I can even if I miss a week.

Have a reward - I try to do my housework a little bit every day, and I don't plan to do anything on Saturday - that is my rewards day. The block of time I have on Saturday is to do anything that we didn't get to - or if we had a good week and did everything we have some time off! Yay!! An inbuilt motivation.

Let somethings go and recognise the season of your life - There have been seasons in my life that the windows only get done if we are having visitors during the day (Our windows get very dirty due to frogs - we live in the tropics) The bedroom floors may hardly ever get mopped, ceiling fans get cleaned once a year (come the dry season when they get turned off and people can actually see the gunk built up on them!). etc.... I have had to let these things go. They don't affect the health of my family or the welcome of guests. I cannot do it all. Then there are some things that affect my wellbeing -mental calm - like the floor. To me that has to be swept every day, maybe twice a day. I sweep though, I don't vacuum as the noise of the vacuum gets to my head. Sweeping on the other hand is a relaxing activity that I can either listen to a mp3 audio session or do some thinking/praying. Know yourself and let some things go.

Be thorough - we often think as thorough as perfect. But it isn't. Being thorough is about recognising your goal and doing your best to complete that. Is your goal a perfect looking home? Or is your goal a clean and tidy home with peaceful relationships. I like these thoughts on Thoroughness from Character First.

Thoroughness: Knowing what factors will diminish the effectiveness of my work or words, if neglected.
Opposite is: Incompleteness

Tips for thoroughness:
* complete my work
* pay attention to details
* make a list so I don't forget
* finish what I start
* clean up along the way.

Well, I've convinced myself on how to face my cleaning responsibilities today - LOL - hope I've helped you too.

Jan. 20, 2010 - Mini Routines working for us

Our life is made up of routines – most likely even those who think they don’t like routines have routines.  Routines are habitual patterns of behaviour – we may wake up at the same time, exercise-shower-breakfast is a routine, we may always have a hot chocolate before we go to bed – that is a routine.  My life is made up of many mini routines that are so well established I don’t even think about it – but that is what makes it routine!

I have been thinking about these types of things that happen in our family – they make our family hum along.

• Waking up time:  Though we recognise that everyone has a different body clock we also recognise that one family member affects the whole so in order to start our day well we have a cut off point – a time everyone needs to be on deck ready to go.

• Meal times – The evening dinner meal is our family time.  Breakfast and lunch, prepared and eaten individually has a set timeframe once again because our actions affect other people.   We have different habbits on the weekend.

• Personal Responsibilities – Personal devotions, chores, exercise.  We have 3 chore times throughout the day.

• Family Devotions – This is the time we call everyone together in the morning.  We start off with a Bible reading, we discuss it and pray.  Then we have our family meeting.

• Family Meeting – Everyone brings their diaries to the table at Family Devotions time.  This is when we catch up with everyone’s commitments and plans for the day.  I give the children an idea of what I have planned for their studies for the day.

• Bedtime – This has changed over the years but we try and keep to a set bedtime.  Our children go to sleep better if they have a little down time before lights out.  Over the years I have come to the conclusion that reading is the best downtime, though the children would prefer to do crafts, listen to audio, and be on the computer (a definite no!)  Bedtime is determined largely by a child’s ability to be happy when they wake up in the morning.
• 
  Regular commitments – grocery shopping, Bible Study, prayer meeting. 

Then there are other routines which we are establishing

• Read Aloud after dinner – This happens in our house in spits and spurts.  Too many night time commitments or Video nights challenges us from making this habitual.  We are working on it!

• Exercising – some of the family have a good exercise routine, some don’t.  We are working on everyone exercising most days.

• Afternoon Routines – Our goal for our afternoons is to be productive.  Some of us do that well, some need help.

There are times where even these established routines get shaken and our family can go along quite well for a time, and then we start to pop some stitches and things start to unravel.  Hopefully we can catch it all early enough before things become chaotic.  These days, with older children, we have a bigger grace period; we can last longer with shaky routines than we could when the family was younger.  Once again we need to recognise seasons in our life.

What does an unravelling day look like?  In our family the things that indicate to me that we need to snap up to some basic routines are:

• snarky relationships – nothing is wrong, and yet nothing is really right either!
• Lack of order – things don’t get finished or put away. Piles start growing
• Conversation stops – we don’t make time, or feel we don’t have time for relationships – this could be consciously or unconsciously decided.
• Everyone is tired – regardless of how much sleep is happening

Do you know the signs in your house?

Jan. 12, 2010 - Proverbs 31 - An Older Woman in your life

One of the things that keep striking me as I consider Proverbs 31 is that though the mother speaking these words is instructing her son to look for a woman like this - obviously he will be looking for a young woman but this mother is painting a picture of an older woman, a woman who has had time to develop skills, find success in business, have children and then her husband sits at the gate - older men sit at the gate.    There is conflicting information here.

On the one hand she is encouraging her son to find a woman like this and yet the very woman she is describing is an older woman. 

I believe that she is painting a picture of the heart of the woman - a young woman that has a heart for these things, a young woman who is able, who is willing, who has the inclinations towards these things.  This type of woman will follow her heart (learn to do these things) and she will end up being a blessing in her husband’s life.

So are these things on your heart? 

• Do you want to provide for your family physically – food and clothing?
• Do you want to provide for your family emotionally and spiritually?
• Do you want to have the trust of your husband?
• Do you want to use your money wisely?
• Do you want to be strong and able bodied?
• Do you want to work with your hands, to work long and hard?
• Do you want to have surplus produce, the work of your hands, to sell to others
• Do you want to care for the poor and needy (physically, mentally, emotionally, socially, and spiritually)
• Do you want to present yourself well to the community (to dress well)
• Do you want to have a good reputation in the community (strength and honour are her clothing)
• Do you want to have wisdom on your tongue?

Have you ever had an older woman in your life that you aspired to be like?  This is the type of relationship we should have with Proverbs 31 woman.  I know that the women that I aspire to be like would say one thing to me - “You should have seen me as a young bride!”

The skills they have that I want to emulate didn’t come to them over night – they did one thing at a time.  I cannot believe that it was any different in Old Testament times.

One thing!  Is there one thing that you know you need to improve on?  Ha! You say – there’s more than one!!!  Well, pray about it and ask God to simplify it for you, to tell you which one thing to focus on.  And then do something about it.

• Pray for God’s guidance and grace to change, pray for his strength to break old habits
• Look for a role model – someone who has that one area of life under control – talk to them, ask them for instruction, tips, encouragement – possibly even ask them to disciple you – to teach you and hold you accountable over a period of time – so you can learn that one discipline in life. (You may not find a role model in real life – these days books and the internet often have to suffice – but real life is best).
• Search for understanding and wisdom.  Understanding is knowing about stuff – wisdom is knowing how God wants you to apply it.  Research your topic, read about it, talk it over with your husband, mentor and friends.  Pray about it – to know how God wants you to apply your new knowledge to your life.
• Practice it – get up and get going, put this new knowledge into practice.
• Expect failures – breaking an old habit and establishing new ones is hard work, we will slip, we will lose motivation, we may even give up – but we must keep our eyes on Jesus – in Him there is no condemnation.  He believes in you!  (Romans 8:1,2   Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.) 

By the way – we will not be praised for all the good stuff we do for our family or in business – we will be praised because we fear the Lord (Prov 31 vs 30).  Out of a fear of the Lord this woman produces fruit of her hands which can be seen by all.  So though we need to care for our family, and for others, it will truly come out of our fear of the Lord – out of a worshipful awe of who He is and what He has done for us.   This puts striving to be a Proverbs 31 woman in a whole new perspective.  First comes our love of God.

Jan. 10, 2010 - Internet Reading January 10th

Nomi eagerly received her writing prompt chart from Proverbsfamily.

This review on Jean Welles Worship Guitar class has prompted me to do something abut Guitar lessons for Daniel.  I’ve been receiving Jean Welles newsletters for sometime but haven’t done anything with that.  (Which oddly enough serves as a reminder to delete emails I’m not doing anything with!)

A pdf chart or character trait definitions from the Duggar family

Instructions on how to make a lap-board, you know those tables that sit on your lap with a cushion underneath to give stability.  Making one or two sounds like a great project (for someone!  Someday!)

I’ve been reading on a variety of topics – lapbooking, living math, and Charlotte Mason by reading Squidoo Lens by Jimmie.  She is a wonderful resource – and nice and quick to read – definitely worth bookmarking!

POTD – This acronym is going to show up a fair bit this year – Photo of the Day.  Spell out Loud has a free e-book outlining this project and giving great helps, tips and ideas.  Daniel 10yo is going to do a POTD album this year though we are only aiming for 5 photos a week.  The idea is for him to merge his love of photography – and to improve that – with his emerging skill of writing.  My goal is for him to use a template so he doesn’t have creative decisions to make each day from the scrapbooking perspective, so he’ll be able to focus on taking good photos and writing interesting sentences.  If he wants to do creative scrapbooking then that is another project and that is okay.  His POTD will be a part of  his discipline studies – to do everyday.

Jan. 9, 2010 - Consistency

Consistency would have to be the most consistent challenge a mother faces!   I found this quote this morning when I was studying sincerity.

We know what a person thinks,
not when he tells us what he thinks,
but by his actions.
- Isaac Basheuis Singer

I think of the things I have trouble staying consistent in

·        The standard of obedience

·        Keeping to plans (I know you need to be flexible but sometimes we need to keep to plans as well!)

·        Exercise habit

After reading this quote I have to ask myself – I wonder what I believe about obedience, my plans and my exercise?  Because my actions tell me I don’t believe them to be very important.

Then my parenting brain kicked and I realised that my children know what I think about obedience, my plans and my exercise – they see my actions! 

Before we can be consistent with anything we need to know what we believe about it.  Take obedience for example – Do I believe obedience in children is a good idea, a nice idea or a God idea.  If I believe it is a God idea and I am not walking in it and practicing it then I am sinning.  I need to get that right with God. 

We need to know why we do something – why we expect obedience, why we have plans, why we have those particular plans, why am I exercising etc…

I remember Heather saying, if your way is broken so is your how.  That is, if we don't know why we do something then any actions of trying to do it will be flawed.

You maybe interested in reading the following articles as well:

5 Keys to Consistency

Character Notes - Sincerity

Sincerity for a Homeschool Mum

Jan. 7, 2010 - Intentionally Developing your Child’s Conscience

One of the things I like to do is to assess my children’s standing every so often.  (I’d like to do it monthly but I think every 3 months is more likely what really happens though it happened more regularly when they were younger.)  When I look at each individual child I look at their relationships (both with God and man), how they handle responsibilities, character based responses and where they are at in terms of their social, emotional, mental and physical growth.  Once I’ve ‘assessed’ these things then I can decide what area to intentionally teach, practice or expect them to grow in over the next period of time.  This is one way of being intentional in our parenting.

This week I read Biblical Parenting’s 10 Things to Evaluate the Strength of your Child’s Conscience.  I appreciated the depth of ideas here, it covers a lot and as a parent I need reminding of the complex makeup of our children and all the different facets that we can train them in.

Jan. 7, 2010 - Manoah’s Prayers – Are they my Prayers?

In reading the beginning of the story of Samson I was struck with some challenges.  Samson’s parents were normal folk and yet they we in an unusual situation.  Judges 13 begins the story.

v. 1  Again the children of Israel did evil in the sight of the Lord, and the Lord delivered them into the hand of the Philistines for forty years. 

Yet in the midst of this wicked generation there was a man called Manoah – now the Bible does not say that he followed God, that he stood out amongst the others as someone who was righteous and yet the rest of the story makes you see that he truly did believe in God and wanted to do all that was right in God’s eyes.

You see, his wife was barren and yet one day the angel of the Lord appeared to her and said (v. 3) “Indeed now, you are barren and have borne no children, but you shall conceive and bear a son.  Now therefore, please be careful not to drink wine or similar drink, and not to eat anything unclean.  For behold you shall conceive and bear a son.  And no razor shall come upon his head, for the child shall be a Nazirite to God from the womb, and he shall begin to deliver Israel out of the hand of the Philistines.”

Wow!!  Imagine being told that.

She raced off and told her husband.  And it is his response that challenged my heart as a parent today. In verse 8 Manoah prayed “O my Lord please let the Man of God whom You sent come to us again and teach us what we shall do for the child who will be born.” (emphasis mine)

Manoah

·         Believed God’s message/word

·         Had a teachable heart

·         Knew that wisdom to be a parent came from God

Well, God listened to Manoah’s prayer and in verses 9-11 God sends his angel again.  But listen to Manoah’s words once more in verse 12  “Now let your words come to pass! What will be the boy’s rule of life, and his work?”

Manoah had one desire to know of God – how to parent this child.  Not how to be a parent – but how to parent this child that God had given to them. 

Each of our children are from God, each of our children have a particular life’s purpose – it is our job as a parent to seek God and be in tune with God’s will.    Prov 22:6  Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.  This way is the way that God has created in their being – just as Sampson was created with a way for him – a purpose, a bent, an inclination – so too have our children.    God created them with it deep within his design of them. 

Do we know what it is?  Have we prayed like Manoah prayed?

·         Teach us what we shall do for this child

·         What will be this child’s rule of life and his work?  In other words - What do I need to prepare him/her for?

Jan. 5, 2010 - Our productive January

Jan. 5, 2010 - Students Control Journal

I want my children to learn how to manage their time, their responsibilities, their projects, their study and their social life. 

So far they are familiar with a routine.  A routine establishes habit.  Habit helps you do tough things when you don’t want to! 

They are familiar with to-do lists.

• chore rosters
• study assignments and reading lists
• project lists

They are familiar with accountability – every day I (am supposed to) expect them to place their diary and any finished work on my desk.  This is something that needs tightening up in our household.  We tend to do this on the run a little which isn’t really good.  For me to maximise learning and discipleship opportunities I need to be in touch with what they are working on.  They have used check lists for many years - this is a form of accountability.

In 2009 I created a Control Journal for myself – I call it my “Whole Life Diary”.  The thing I like about my diary is that it helps me manage all areas of my life – my general to-do lists, my office work, my projects, keeping the house clean and food on the table, homeschooling, discipling my children, celebrating birthdays, and this year I’m going to add a section for my creativity and reading/learning.  (A friend adds finances but I have a computerised system for that so that would be doubling up for me – and this is the beauty of a system that you put together for yourself – you include the thing in your Control Journal / diary that are important for you, in order for you to be orderly.)

Anyway, I am creating a Control Journal for each of my children.  This is a work in progress but so far I am thinking:

• Daily to-do list – at this stage this aspect won’t be a part of the control journal.  I’ve pondered over the pros and cons of this and have decided to stick withour hardcover bound one day a page diary for this aspect of organisation.  It works well for us, and I’m thinking – if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!  But as always when you start new systems, everything has to be up for review at some stage.  I’ll put this section in their binders anyway so they can develop it the way they want to for any other lists they may choose to create.  It also tells them that in such a system you need daily lists.
• Study – This will be predominately an assignment sheet and a reading list.  This would be the place for them to file any plans for study.  I would also like to see lined paper kept in this section so if they are caught without a reading journal or notepad they have somewhere to record their thoughts.
• Responsibilities – I will file prompt sheets for their chores, and a copy of the rosters (though we have this hanging in the kitchen I think it will be good practice for them to know they have their own copy). 
• Personal Development– A place to store Bible memory verses, or character prompts that are particularly pertinent to each child.  Maybe prompt cards that I create for a child to help them through an issue.
• Talents – Each child’s folder will be unique, especially in this area.  They may file important information relevant to a subject they are pursuing or it may simply be a list of creative projects they have in mind.
• Correspondence – a place to file letters received, holding them till they’ve been replied to.  Once replied to any letters they wish to keep will be filed in another filing system.
• Phone Numbers and important information
• Birthdays and gift-giving

These sections are not written in here sequence – that sequence will develop as our children use these folders.  I think it is important to have the most used sections as the front or directly at the back as it is quicker to locate.   

It is also important to give the children the freedom to make this binder their own.  I will give them the same boundaries I put on myself:

1. It is to store information that you find helpful to keep yourself organised and ontop of things – personalise the contents and organisation
2. It is not a filing system – don’t let it get too heavy
3. If it doesn’t work for you – tweak it
4. It has to be used daily