Awards~
I'm one of those cool dudes that think they're the only ones in the world that like newsboys, and they're actually not. Me? oh I don't like the city... no way. I like the country, nothing but it. Mad cartoonist also I am. Mad person also I am. I will be intelligent when hell freezes over, and all that sort of thing... ENJOY my blog
Chapter One
In which: the characters break a mirror, in a tree house, and the old man lands on a hard substance, the threadlike second-character falls on the fatter one, Skinny whistles and comes upon a house with a kind host, poison!, An argument over a twig, the stump, a swim, another battle.
***
One day an old man and another old man (one of them was five feet tall and he was marvellously fat while the other one was a extremely skinny 7 foot tall old skeleton of a man) were going for a walk. Since all adventures start by the main characters falling into a mirror and ending up in another world, then that's probably how I'm going to have to start this one because you can't get around the law. Well they just happened to be going to their tree house (and this tree house had a little handheld mirror) so they climbed up the ladder that led into their tree house and got the mirror. Then the fat one touched it and he disappeared. and then the Skinny man touched it and disappeared leaving the mirror suspended in mid air for half a second (for the mirror was deciding whether it should stay and wait to see if the owner of the mirror would appear again, but decided to abide in the law of gravity) then it smashed to the floor giving them seven years of bad luck.
Now let us go to what happened the the old men. Well the first one, (the short and fat one) happened to fall on a flat piece of cement which was in the middle of the wood (don't ask me how it got to be in the middle of the wood, it was just there to make life tough for the old man). Also the skinny 7 foot tall man landed in the same spot, which was still occupied by the short and fat 5 foot tall man. Squashing the short-and-fat-5-foot-tall-4-foot-wide old man so that he became a 'short-and-fat-5-and-a-half-foot-tall-5-foot-wide-old man' also making his profile view a bit shorter from left to right. Now the extremely-skinny-man-who-was-7-feet-tall was extremely fortunate to land on the short-and-fat-5-and-a-half-foot-tall-5-foot-wide-old man, Because it broke his fall (and the piece of cement). Now as you might have noticed, this story is extremely descriptive in every microscopic detail. I have already described the misfortunes of the short-and-fat-5-and-a-half-foot-tall-5-foot-wide-old man. So now I will describe the misfortunes of what ensued after the landings of the short-and-fat-5-and-a-half-foot-tall-5-foot-wide-old man and the extremely-skinny-man-who-was-7-feet-tall. A began to argue that each others misfortunes were even more misfortunate than the others. Following which, a battle was begun where the extremely-skinny-man-who-was-7-feet-tall had a lot of height wich was better for some things like jumping up into trees to escape the short-and-fat-5-and-a-half-foot-tall-5-foot-wide-old mans wild frenzy (For he was a Bedlamite) Suddenly in the middle of the battle the short-and-fat-5-and-a-half-foot-tall-5-foot-wide-old man stuck out his hand so to shake that of the skinny man (we shall call the skinny man 'Skinny' and the other 'Fat' okay) Skinny was surprised but then remembered that it was normal for Fat to do this sort of thing (For he was a Bedlamite) so they shook hands and the battle was finished. The now sworn comrades decided that this was not their home (earth) and so they decided to set off and explore it. They found (like what there always is in forests) a cottage. Golden rule of writing: 'if one goes walking in a forest, one must 'happen' to find a cottage, also, the cottage must have a plume of snoke coming from it's chimney.' Next rule is that 'the owner of the cottage must happen to have the kettle on.' So, walking in the laws of writing, I will continue the story. Skinny took the lead with Fat trotting along behind, (or rather galloping) for he had to keep up with Skinnys long strides. Skinny began to whistle the tune 'Roll out the Barrel' and Fat wanted to join in but he had to use all his breath for running with.
They happened to come across a small stone cottage, which had smoke emitting from the chimney. deciding to view the inhabitant or inhabitants they strode/galloped forward and knocked on the door. It happened to be an 'inhabitant' and not 'inhabitants' He offered them in saying that he just happned to have the kettle on. they walked in and heard the kettle whistling away to it's hearts content. I do not really know if kettles have hearts. But to Fat this one seemed to, For it was whistling to its hearts content.
I have decided to break the law right now, the law being that the writer must make the inhabitant of a cottage a nice chubby little fellow. In short, I have decided to make the inhabitant an evil poisonous fellow who is tall and not skinny or fat. I must hope and pray that my punishment for breaking the law wont be too severe on judgement day.
Fat thought the man had a twinkle in his eye while at the same time Skinny was deciding that he had the opposite to a twinkle. I don't really know what the opposite to a twinkle is so I am not saying. In short: The eye of Fat perceived hi to be kindly while the eye of Skinny perceived him a vile worm trying to hide his vileness with a twinkle. Let us bring these petty descriptions to a close and continue with the riveting account of Fat and Skinny.
The kindly worm, of whos name, they figured out, was Edgar Larrikin, took the kettle away and put a mysterious powder inside it, which he said was a harmless poison that sent one to sleep, (I won't tell you that he mixed his Poison up with flour until later). Saying that he was inserting a couple of packets of sugar. Bringing the kettle back now he ut it in front of them with an evil glare in his eyes that even Fat could make out. But as Fat was a Bedlamite, he didn't realize that an evil glare in ones eye meant that the owner of the fiercome glare was a bad character.
Edgar Larrikin had thought that the substance he had put in was his fast killing poison that he put on a shelf next to a packet of flour which was in the cellar that had a wall that was made of stone and was very cold. The cellar was situated under the floor of Edgar Larrikins house which was a wooden floor with lots of red stains on it. The poison, he had put in a bag that looked exactly like that of flour. so as he wouldn't get on the bad side of any visitor that came and saw a bag labeled poison.
For, he thought, If one was to come in and see a bag labeled 'Poison, only to be put in visitors drinks' then the Visitors would begin to suspect that he was a Madcap and leave as soon as possible. Which is a very logical explanation, for John Doe was a wise man.
I remember one day a long time ago a man came to my house and he asked to go and use the bathroom. On his way ther he lost his way and found himself in my poison room for, as I take a liking to experiments and high explosive powders and liquids I kept a room especially for the ingredients of my experiments. He wandered in there helplessly lost in the labyrinth of rooms that I had and came across a bottle labeled. 'Poison:' it read, causing the lungs to shrivel to the size of an apple. My once fine friend now became a bit wary of me. He picked up another bottle and read the label. Head shrinking poison, it read. My now terrified friend was going to rush from the room, when he caught sight of another red bottle. It was labeled: Drinking Petroleum. this was too much, and the last thing I saw was his back and his arms flailing as he ran away. I had troubles with the police shortly after.
Back to the story, They drank their tea and knowing it was poison but drinking it anyway. Skinny knew not why he drank, but he was thirsty. Fat said it tasted like bread. Then after thanking their Host they walked out the door leaving a bewildered manager behind them.
After that little episode, the Two travellers knew not which way to turn. Fat sugested West while Skinny sugested that they go East. Fat told Skinny that he would begin a frenzy if they didn't go West, and Skinny said he wuld pick Fat upand drop him if they didn't go East. Then a thought came to Skinny:
“Which way is East and which was is North?”
Fat raised his eyebrows and shut his eyes in a manner that would impress the most clever of scholars.
“Of course, as an astronomer [he was not] I can tell the directions by the stars,” he said in a manner that would also impress the most clever of scholars.
Fat wishing to impress Skinny, (still with his eyes shut) looked up into the heavens, then he opened his eyes, and percieved that there was not a star in the sky. He had forgotten that it was day and that he was in a different world and that stars might not exist in this world.
His pride shattered, (for he could not tell direction from the sun). he sat down on a thistle and leaped up to the height of Skinny, then chose a better spot to sit down and sat there in a heap of gloom that could have been mistaken for a dung heap. His gloom soon transferred to Skinny who, for half a second, thought he was a dung heap. And they both sat down and knew not where to turn.
Then they decided that the would throw a stick and see which way it pointed, So fat chose one that had a twig on one side and a leaf on the other, and threw it. It landed pointing alng the path, then an argument ensued from the fact that Skinny said that the side that decided which way they were going was the side with the leaf while Fat said it was the side with the twig. so Fat made a decision, and said that it was the leaf side, and so they threw it again. This time it pointed into the forest, But Fat didn't want to go there so they threw it again, and it pointed back to the evil mans house, But Skinny didn't want to go back in there so they threw it again and this time it pointed to a big oak tree, But They both didn't want to go there, Fat wanted it to point to a Stump and Skinny wanted it to point to a lake that was behind them. But it didn't do any of them so Fat finally dropped the stick and made it to point to the stump and then Skinny argued and moved it to point to the Lake. But Fat said he's go into another frenzy and Skinny said he's pick Fat up and drop him. but fat insisted, so they went to the stump, but there was nothing interesting there s fat went back and got the sitck and made it point to the lake, and so they walked to the lake and threw it again and this time it pointed into the lake so they went into the lake. They had a good time swimming until Fat yelled when he thought something touched him. Fat started racing back to the shore until Skinny confessed that it was him touching him to see what he did.
Then Fat said he would go into a Frenzy and Skinny said he would pick Fat up and drop him if he went into a frenzy so a vicious circle was made. and it went on for some hours. Finally fat said:
“I'm pooped,” and Skinny said,
“Amen”
so they stopped and then described all the fancy things they had done to each other and remarking how fun it was. Fat was saying.
'It was great I would go into a frenzy and bite your leg and then just as I was getting to the bone you'd pick me up and drop me and then I'd perform the same ceremony,' while Skinny was saying,
“Yes, yes,” to punctuate Fat's wild talking. Eventually they grew tired of talking. Fat wanted to continue talking of his wonderful moves and Skinny said he's had enough of his bragging voice. Fat said he would go into a frenzy and Skinny said he'd pick Fat up and drop him but then Fat would argue by saying that he wuld be biting onto his leg so that skinny wouldn't be able to pick him up.
Then suddenly a big sea monster came up out of the water. (because I am sticking to the laws again, for always when there is a lake there is a sort of monster in it). Fat said.
“I'll go into a frenzy and bite him and you can jump on him,” so it was decided. and Fat went into a frenzy and Skinny jumped on the monster. Then Fat fell to spitting and coughing and swam back to the shore because he said the monster tasted “Foul” and he had had enough. So Skinny said to the monster that they had had enough and so the monster went back into the depths with a smart salute. Skinny went back to the shore and began to follow Fats suite and basked alongside him.
what do ya think of it. Tell me if you want more. Okay.
Wotcher
BobaFett/Nathan
By the way if you wanna go to my mums blog, jus' click here okay? Okay for now I'll have to go so g-bye and comment lots and lots and lots Coz I might not be posting for yonks but then again I might.
Wotcher
BobaFett~
This entry's going to be brief it's mostly to say that the answer to the quiz (which sadly only two people tried to do and got wrong. The guys is Sir Arthur Conan Doyle the author of Sherlock Holmes, The most famous detective story that exists. So maybe I'll say something against people who don't let yer climb trees.
Let's say the person that doesn't let yer climb them is called 'bob' and i'm 'me'
Okay, les say I'm climbng a tree.
Me: *whistles*
Bob: Hey you!
Me: You talking to me?
Bob: Yeah.
Bob: have yo;u got a tail?
Me: No, did you think I would?
Bob: No, because if ya have a tail ya have a tail you have a right to climb a tree and if ya don't have on then ya dont.
Me: Ha ha, that's a lousy joke.
Bob: Isn't.
Me: well In the bible Zacheus(sp?) climbed a tree.
Bob: yeah and then Jesus told him to come down.
Bob: so shut up and get ya lousy self out of that tree.
Me: Not in ten thousand years my man.
So do you get the point that I hate people who tell ya off for climbing trees? Gotta go my timer's going off.
Wotcher
BobaFett~
Dawn Just tagged me!!
1. What kind of car will you drive? Manuel or automatic? Manuel
2. What is your favorite Olympic sport? Gymnastics
3. A cookbook said that anchovies are a food that you either love or hate. What are you? Stinkin' 'Orrible
4. Rank these in order of liking: Peanut butter, jam, vegemite and honey: Vegemite, jam, honey, Peanut butter.
5. And these: Astronomy, biology, maths, history, geography and archeology History, History
6. How did you start blogging? My Mum told me about it.
7. What are two countries that your ancestors came from? Scotland and England
8. How many comments did you get 5 entries ago?
9. How many houses have you lived in your life? Seriously, I have lost count!!
10. In what form do you like eggs? Scrambled
11. If you went back in time, what time would you like to go to? The 1914s to the end of the second world war.
12. What 4 bloggers are you tagging next? Boomer, Burger, Bibleman, coffeegirl.
Okay here is a quiz: who is this? (he's a writer as well)
Author Doesn't he look great?
Now I wanna say that we have seen a group of Wedge tailed eagles. (They live in a nest on our property). and we even got to see one standing on the ground (about 3/4ths of a meter tall, HUGE)
Here aare some pictures I found on the web.
Wedgie
To give oyu an idea of how big they are, here is a picture of one eating a dead kangaroo.
Wedgie
Okay I have decided I want 60 comments at least on this entry so please comment
Wotcher
BobaFett~
Okay I am gunna do some pictures of some of my favourite Authors. Firstly there is: Charles Dickens (below) one of the most famous Authors of all time and rolly good at writing:
Doesn't he look great. But Now here I'll show you my Favourite wirter (below) and he has written one of the best books I have ever read:
Thirdly (below) there is Mark Twain who was a very famous writer and wrote one of my favourite books which is "Tom Sawyer" He also wrote Huckleberry Finn and lots others:
Then there Are the Authors C.S. Lewis, (below left) author of The Narnia and J.R.R. Tolkien.(below right)
Tolkiena is Author Of Lord Of The Rings
Don't they look awesome It always influences your ideas of their books when you know what they look like.
Now I'll give you a picture of Jules Verne who looks the best out of all these photos.
And here is the author of the "Biggles" Series:
Wotcher
BobaFett~
Wotcher
BobaFett~
We must stop them from pouring out lies and insults. Breathing out threats, and evil comments. I ask you all to go and tell them what you think of them, insulting boys and calling them narrow minded.
Now there is nothing I have held against girls mind you but all my friends that are girls (most of them) should come and tell me that I am not narrow minded and we boys can go and tell Dawn909 and sharla88 what we think of them. Come on Men! TO ARRRMS!!.
Wotcher
BobaFett~
Okay those were from around our bush (in case you didn't know (you should know) we live on a 43 acre property of bush) I did them a month or two ago and I haven't done any others since then excluding the ant nest expedition. The Background I have now. Is the first picture but I adapted it.
Okay Bye for now and tell me what you think.
Wotcher
BobaFett~
Chapter XXII
They talked about their
journeys. Theron recited about his fall down the cliff and the others filled in where they came in. The bard sat silently smoking his pipe and listened intently. Every now and then he would interrupt them to tell them to go back to some earlier part of their story and sometimes he would rush them onto another further part of it.
When they finished their talking and all sat around the fire gazing at it with round eyes, The Bard suddenly growled;
‘H'm-m, nasty piece of work those groveling Quezillians are they not?’
‘Eh?’ said Theron inquisitively.
‘Hum? oh, nothing,’ he replied.
At that the Bard pushed himself out of his chair, and walked out of the room with the others looking after him. He slammed the door as he went out in the manner that shook the house slightly.
Garathorn Raised his eyebrows at the others and they returned it.
Garathorn Picked up the spare smoking pipe that the Bard had given him, Smoking it thoughtfully.
His teeth were clenched around the pipe strongly. He began to murmur something through his teeth, Something that no one could have understood even if everything was silent and they were listening carefully.
After a whole hour of silence Théron suggested getting some sleep. Gladroth yawned and padded up the stairs to the bedroom. Théron waited for Garathorn but presently he saw that it didn't seem as though he would be coming in a while, so he went up the stairs by hmself in the dark. He went past the bard's room and Suddenly heard a growling, hissing sound and he pressed his ears ot the door and was frightened as there was a ferocious scratching at the door. No light showed through the crack under the door so he presumed the room to be in darkness. He heard a sniffin at the sides of the door and he became quite afraid and even more so whenn he heard the scrambling sound of someone climing out of a windo and then the dull pattering sounds of a four footed animal running away.
Presently he heard, in the distance, a terrifying Howl and then all was silent.
He listened for five minutes more and then went up to bed. He lay in his bed, although it was not a very comfortable bed it was comfortable enough for him to sleep well. But this night he was not tired even though he had had a very weary day and had felt tired all throughout it, When it came to the night, he could not sleep!
It was one whole hour until Garathorn came up to bed. He slept on the floor with a sheet over him.
Presently his breathing changed and Théron could tell he was asleep. After anohter half hour he heard the front door opening and shutting, he heard the bolts being drawn across and he sat up. Presently he heard the stairs creaking as someone came up. He slowly walked to the door and peered out. He saw the Bard's hand just shutting the door. His pointer finger was covered with fur, and a sharp claw potruded from the end. Then the door closed and he couldn't see anything more. He waited and presently he heard the sound ot snoring and he closed the dor and got back into his bed. But for the rest of that night he could not sleep.
* * *
The morning came, Théron was the first to rise. It was before anyone was awake that he got up and went out side to get some fresh air. The forest in front of him was wet with dew and the air smelled fresh as ice. Presently he heard the sound of footsteps inside and he went back into the house.
Okay i hope you liked it and here's the tag:
1: what are your 4 favourit keys on the key board? (~) (.) (') and (%)
2: Describe in 30 words or less what you want to look like when you are older? I dunno really
3: Have you been on a motor bike?. if so have you fell of one? Nope and i Haven't fallen off one
4: Do you like the smell of Desel or petrol? Not really (but there are worse smells)
5: What are two things you want to do but can't? Blog For longer and...
6: What do you like best: wood fire heater, gas heater or eletric heater? Wood fire heater
7: Have you been on a steam train? Yeah
8: What do you do for a hobbie? Collect Rubber Bands
9: How many comments do you think you will have by: July the 25th? maybe 500 although June the 25th isn't that far away so maybe I wont have that Much
10: are you very good at swimming?
Okay that's all for now and Ill be posting in a while soon as well.
Wotcher
~BobaFett~Chapter XXI
They pocketed the piece of black material and climbed upon their horses. They looked at the small massacre that they had done. Pools of Blood were seeping out from under the victims bodies, slowly growing bigger. They then rode onward into the almost setting sun. But Théron was not thinking of the onward march, or anything to do with it. When they had finally defeated the Quezillians He had heard the ear piercing scream of some creature, unknown to the world, Something unusual had made that scream. No doubt it was not a man, but some evil dark sounding scream with a slight hiss to it. The others seemed to be in conversation, and presently he started thinking of what lay ahead of him. They would get to the Bard that night, in fact, he could see the lights of his house on the far horizon. He hailed the others and told him he could see the lights and they nodded and Garathorn told him;
‘Aye we shall be there in maybe half an hour, I shall be glad to get into a shelter of some sort,’
‘And sit around a nice snug campfire’ added Gladroth.
At long last they reached the house, tightly nestled in a row of hedges.
The night was, by then, very dark and they could see firelight shining through the windows. They rapped on the door a couple of times until they heard a morose old voice from inside the log cabin. They looked at one another and wondered if this was the right house after all.
But presently they heard soft padding footsteps of feet wearing slippers. The door opened slowly and just enough for a head the poke itself out,
It was a roundish head with a form of nightcap in his head and a long bushy moustache accompanying a small beard. had also poked itself out from behind the door holding a candle. He asked them gruffly,
‘What do you want?’
Garathorn took of his cap and bowed slightly,
‘My companions and I would like lodging for the night,’ he said.
‘Well I don’t know who you are so you can get yerselves lost’
And with that, he slammed the door in their faces blowing a gust of wind in their faces. The man’s candle evidently blew out because he cursed silently and he mumbled something about; ‘blasted candles’
‘Well.. what a kind and good mannered person,’ said Gladroth in an acid manner.
They discussed the matter for a while, and then decided that they should tell him that they were from Èthrain.
This decided, they knocked on the door once more.
‘Shut up and go away yer beggars,’ came the gruff voice from inside. ‘Stop knocking on the Blasted door or I’ll knock yer ‘eds off’
‘Excuse me,’ said Garathorn Politely, ‘but may I be so bold as to say, that we are sent from Èthrain bearing a letter for yourself.
‘Ach, why didn’t yer say so in the first place,’ came the voice.
Immediately, the door opened and they were pulled inside rudely.
C-ya
BobaFett~
- What's your worst food? FISH
- Do you hate fish? YUP it's the most disgusting thing that god ever invented
- Do you hate meat? Yup, another one of those disgusting things
- What are the clothes you are wearing now? A T-shirt, a long country bumpkin shirt, 2 thick Jumpers, And 2 layers of tracksuit pants (with the fire on) and boy am I cold.
- Do you have any animals? Yup, 7 goats, 5 Chooks, 1 Dog, 1 Cat, 1 Cockatoo, and I think that's all.
- What's your favourite book? Elidor, and all the Howard Pyle Books.
- what's the scaryest thing you ever did or saw? Err... I dunno
Well I hope you find it entertaining or somethingCheerio
BobaFett~
Well the day before yesterday we stayed up again and we sat round the fire me and Yoshi and my Dad.
and at three o'clock we went home in the mist (we put water on the fire and it all turned into a fog). Yesterday I did a really fun driving lesson and I got to go on third gear (it seemed as though some little jet engines came out through flaps from the side of the car and turned themselves on). I am also reading a book by Charles Dickens called "A christmas carol" and it's scary with ghosts and stuff in it.
Anyway, gotta go,
BobaFett.
Guess what we saw yesterday??? we saw some World War 2 planes!!! and they flew down so low that the pilots could have flown under a snakes belly without knocking their hats off! and we could see the markings on the bottom of their wings and everything. It was so cool.