Posted in Eclectic Me

He puts His nose to the grind stone, doesn't He?  Well, He sure is working me through some issues.  Issues that I don't really want to face.  You know the kind that are very personal, the kind that make you not want to look in the mirror.  That's where He has me working.  It's so hard to accept the fault's that meant ehmost to me.  I fear I have been in denial about the issues, but trying to fix them without looking at their root.  It's just too ugly.  I falt don't want to!  I said this morning to God,"I don't want to do this.  I don't want to go down this road.  Can't you just fix it and make it all better and send me on my way?"  Now how immature is that?! 

Now, I am just asking for the strength to look at these things and for Him to grow me up as He sees fit.  I have to let Him continue to conform me to Christ's image.  I feel like a kid stomping her feet about not wanting to go to bed.  "No God!  I won't do it!  You can't make me!  I want to stay just as I am!" 

It is interesting to me how although we are adults, we act as children when relating to God.  As I have grown, I have watched my views, attitude, and ideas change about my parents.  I see things differently than I did 5 years ago.  5 years ago I saw things differently than I did 5 years before that...and so on.  Further reflection lets me know He doesn't see things differently.  He sees us just as we are.  His view of us never changes.  His love for us never changes.  However, as His child, my view of Him has changed as well, but in a different way.  I have grown closer to Him and seek His wisdom more and my own parents' less.  I look for His approval in my life, and not my parents'. 

My children will likely go through similar stages throughout their lives.  Seeing me in a different perspective.  Viewing things differently as experience and age, change their lives.  I pray that for them too, they seek Christ as their helm.  I pray they will always put the Lord before all.  Even when its time to look at the ugly parts.

These are my thoughts.