I found the following comment on my blog:

“sorrow???

You are full of sorrow because your unwed daughter is pregnant? Have you been outside lately, turned on a television, read a national newspaper? Do you not see the suffering of others? I have unwittingly read 3 days of entries here and  I am dumbfounded that you can spend so much time dwelling on your daughter's pregnancy and how it makes you feel, and how you would feel if you were her! Wake up sister! There is a world full of pain and suffering and your time, energy and prayers might be better used outside of your home.” --Anonymous

It’s hard to take criticism, but even the worst criticism can have a thread of truth in it. My first impulse was to say, “It’s my blog and I’ll cry if I want to!” But then, I tried to see her point of view.

Even though this criticism was definitely not said in love, I can agree with it in some respects. When I first heard my unwed daughter was pregnant, I went through some real sorrow and pain. I was very inwardly focused. I will agree. The pain and sorrow are still there, but now I’m not totally focused on it. Life DOES go on.

I don’t know what three days of my blog Anonymous read, but I can imagine that they were the ones where I was still reeling from the pain and shock of it. I think what I was feeling and thinking was a very normal response for anyone who loves their daughter and wants the best for her.

However, I did get past that, as anyone who has continued to read my blogs can see. I have so much to learn yet, but this is a process and I’m not going to get there all at once. In the months between when I first learned about my dd’s pregnancy and now, I have continued to do the things I’ve always done.

To name a few:

--I’m a 4H leader for two projects.

--I’m actively involved in our 4H club, including baking goods for our 4H club’s Valentine Bake Sale.

--I raised money for the March of Dimes Mother’s Drive.

--I helped my daughter to be team captain for Relay for Life (Raising money for the American Cancer Society) BTW, I was team captain last year.

--I baked and took a loaf of cranberry/pumpkin bread to my elderly neighbors who had been sick for several weeks.

--I teach a Good News Bible Club in my home each week.

--I sent a card to my neighbor whose father just died.

--I wrote a letter to my congressman and governor about a bill to veto.

--I picked up trash on the road that wasn’t mine.

--I’m also helping friends pack and move tomorrow and taking lunch to the moving crew. Afterward they’re going to live in my house for a week.

Anonymous, would you say that I’m still self-focused now that you know this about me?

But are these things I would write about in my blog? No! Why not? They don’t have anything to do with the theme of my blog. My blog is a journal of what I’m going through in a particular situation. There are others out there who are going through the same thing, or know someone who is, or will be going through the same thing in the future. These are the people this blog is written for. And also just to write my thoughts down. Sometimes it helps just to let out our feelings.

Life DOES go on. We go on. Others ARE hurting. I think of Missey’s family and friends. But there IS a time for sorrow and a time to reflect. Ms. Anonymous is so right about thinking about others instead of dwelling on ourselves. But she is so Wrong about being dumbfounded that there are some of us who need time to grieve, no matter if our grief is great or small. I hope she will remember this the next time she stumbles on someone who is in sorrow.