Once we headed up the elevator, we walked down a hallway and entered her door.  I was immediately drawn to the main wall of her living area.  There, hung unframed and casually,  were dozens of large 11 x 13 sized pictures of scenes from her life including her with her children, her grown children, grandbabies now grown.  It was like looking at the Bayeaux Tapestry, for me.  I was transfixed!   As I asked about the people on her wall, I discovered she’d outlived 2 husbands and had lost her daughter-in-law to cancer.  Her only son is a widower in his forties.  In the corner of her room sat a high back chinz armchair with a book open on the stand next to it.  Albums of genealogy lined her bookshelves.  A tall rubber plant commanded the center of attention in her little den.  While out on her patio, evidence of an avid "green thumb" was visible.  She wore swingy pale pink linen pants and a crisp cool white blouse. She is tall with sparkly blue eyes and a lovely face.  Her silver hair was pulled up in an elegant low inverted bun, reminding me of how I imagine Jane Eyre had hers. 

 On her small kitchen table were a teapot, cookies and Piroulines.  As we sipped tea she shared bits of her life’s story as I asked questions and tried to simultaneously keep Charis from eating the dirt in her potted plants. 

 So what’s the point of all my sharing this?  I don’t really know for sure except that, I think I (perhaps “we”) naturally tend to seek friendships with people that are similar to ourselves.  We like to find someone with the same age kids, same beliefs, same ideals, same standards, and tastes; someone who affirms our point of view.   And those people are of course so encouraging and precious to us.  But to discover someone so completely out of my sphere of normal friends who just inspires me is, in a nutshell, surprisingly refreshing!  I realize I’m typically pretty self-centered when I’m making friends.  And in trying to be a friend to someone who may be somewhat alone or lonely made me reach beyond myself.  It felt wonderful to know I had brightened her day immensely by simply sitting with her and having her share about her life and revisit her memories.  A simple visit can mean so much to someone living far from their own family.   

But our time together just did amazing things for me too.  For one thing, it helped me see beyond my days as a wrung-out mother.  Someday there will be no more droolly chins to wipe or sibling quarrels to referee.  I’ll get to have an apartment all to myself, a whole thought to myself!!  Ha-ha!  No, really… It made me feel glad that I’m choosing to stay home and invest in the lives of my children rather than a career for myself right now.  Lord willing, there are more seasons to life down the road!  "Lina" is in her golden years, looking back on all the memories she made…days at her beach-house on the North shore, years spent in England, time spent teaching grade school in Hawaii, traveling in Tunisia.  She’s lived a rich, lovely and totally different kind of life than I.  She loves the Lord too.  Someday I’ll be in her shoes…and be looking up at the memories of my home and life all condensed on a wall, joy mixed with sadness. She made me want to live with no regrets.  And she made me want to visit her again and hear more fascinating stories from the novel of her life.  Reach out to an "unlikely" friend...and be stretched, deepened and surprised. 

• Post A Comment! • Send to a Friend!

Posted by Anonymous

I find myself longing for the comforts of friendships such as yours. I don't have anyone here who is in the same or even similar place in life where I am. The Lord has, however, provided special friendships with ladies who are in different places in life. I admit that I do feel lonely sometimes, but the Lord is providing.

Send me an email with your number and I'll give you a call sometime. I, too, would love a chat;) You know, we're just 12 hours exactly apart, which makes choosing times to chat fairly easy.

Love you friend,
maggie
PS Tell Michelle and Nicki that I send warm hugs.

• Permanent Link

Posted by Anonymous

Well, you're not exactly 53 years my senior, but I do like that you're my friend. ;) All joking aside, I think it's wonderful that you've found another friend to learn from and enjoy. And I'm glad that your sweet little girl could brighten some people's days as well.

What a wonderful reminder to cherish our busy, sleepless days while they're here!

~Al

• Permanent Link

Posted by 4sweetums

What a wonderful entry! I was blessed with a friendship like that a few years ago and it was lovely. I would like to do it again. I have a neighbor who I would really like to know better. SHe is 86 and still full of energy. THe little bit that learned about her has really put my life in perspective. Sometimes we get trapped in the present and forget that their will be a future.(I love the present but it makes the harder days easier.) I know what you mean about a whole thought of your own. I don't even know if this makes any since for all the times I have been interrupted.
Blessings,
Dawn

• Permanent Link

Posted by Anonymous

That was a divine appointment ya know?!

Emily
thelearningneverstops.blogspot.com

• Permanent Link

Posted by Anonymous

I agree totally - people who have children should reach out and befriend those without children. People who are married should reach out to singles. People who are young should reach out to the elderly. The elderly should reach out to the young. It might actually surprise people how these relationships can be win-win. I think nowadays, people are so self centered they forget that the elderly who are stuck in their apartments are desperate for company. People who are childless yearn for contact with children. Married people with children complain that they are tired and want sleep and yet if they reach out there might be a young couple, retired couple or a single person who would love to come and watch the kids. You never know until you step out of the comfy little box that you call life and think about others! Plus, what a great ministry for your kids!

• Permanent Link

Posted by Anonymous

What a precious and inspiring post. Makes you take a closer look at who the Lord might be trying to bring into our lives. Have we missed some divine appointments because we weren't looking much past our own sphere?

I pray your new friendship continues to both bless and be a blessing.

Angela
the-potters-hand.blogspot.com

• Permanent Link

Posted by EEEEMommy

What a lovely post! And so true! Thank you for sharing your new friend with us, and inspiring us to look beyond ourselves!

• Permanent Link

Posted by ClagettsFLStyle

post! I so love getting to know older ladies. They are always such a wealth of knowledge, wisdom and experience.

My girls and I used to visit a nursing home weekly when we lived up north. We became very close to so many ladies. We haven't done it since we've moved here to FL and it is constantly tugging on my heart to do so...

Thanks so much for sharing. So happy that you have a new friend.

• Permanent Link

Posted by Anonymous

Oh I love this post! I love visiting with older ladies. They have so much wisdom and insight. This is such a sweet story! It reminds me of a neighbor lady whom our whole family has grown to love..me especially (for more about her you can read here (http://oursimplelives.wordpress.com/2007/11/29/our-neighbor-the-rabbits/ ). Thanks for posting this!

• Permanent Link