Posted in On Being a Wife and Mother
Life has a way of spinning out of control at the oddest times. You expect it to become a vortex of chaos and uncertainty when someone is ill or has passed, during a move, or in times of financial instability, but do you expect it to hit during your regularly scheduled life? I did not, and so was caught quite unawares these last few months.
Nothing specific got in the way; it was a cumulation of things. Family visits, obligations, illness, and performances. Oh my goodness, the performances. Both boys had an abundance of performances they were committed to, and that eats away at your time and sanity after a couple of months. At least, it did mine.
Yesterday my girlfriend and I were talking, using each other as sounding boards, when she asked me if I knew the definition of insanity. Besides being a SAH-Home Educating-Mother? I asked sarcastically. She laughed but said no. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different results. I thought long and hard about that, and agree completely. I had allowed our schedule to get so bogged down in performances and extracurricular activities that I made it through each day by silently chanting "it'll get better next week." But of course it didn't, because there'd be three more performances next week. After a steady diet of this, and of 'working' other things into my weekly schedule, we had no time to decompress, and my husband and I were the proverbial ships in the night. He has been offered a lot of overtime, and we grab at the opportunity because this is his slow time of the year. So, he's been working and I've been shuttling. And I was losing my mind.
So I stopped the insanity (ignore that Susan Powter voice in your head) and am doing things differently. Because I desire different results. I have taken control of our schedule and set up guidelines (no more than one performance per week), and have chosen to live simpler. Less social time, more home time. The holidays are fast approaching, and I would love to snuggle into our home and lives and appreciate the magic of the season.
May you all find the magic of the season in your own homes.
