Oct. 7, 2005 - This is the good life
This is the good life
I've lost everything
I could ever want
And ever dream of
This is the good life
I found everything
I could ever need
Here in Your arms
Those are the lyrics to the song "Good Life" by Audio Adrenaline. Over the past couple of week I have become more and more aware of their truth in my life. Let me explain...
I am a very social person. I love being with people all the time. I get my energy from being with people. My group of friends has always had a very wide age range. I have several adult friends and college age friends as well as jr. high and elementy school friends. But the one age group that I have never seemed to fit with is my own.
My whole life I've had heartbreak when it comes to my relationships with my peers. When I was in 6th grade or so my best-friend-since-birth decided we weren't going to be friends any more. Looking back at it now I see how much we were growing and changing and becoming such different people that it only made sense that we would grow apart. But at the time I was crushed.
I had close friends on and off after that. In Jr. high the Lord brought me the most amazing friend I think I have ever had. We were so like minded and were so perfect for each other. We grew a lot together and just had fun being little girls. But when we hit highschool we both grew up and both found new friends.
There is kind of a gap in my mind as to what happened next. I don't really remember how it all started, this down hill spiral of a relationship. You see, I got close to the wrong people.
They weren't always that way. Or maybe I was just too inocent to see it in the beginning. I try to remember my best guy-friend how he was two years ago and how unique and amazing he was. Everyone looked up to him and all he wanted was to serve God in big ways. I remember riding horses at my best girl friend's house and how fun it was to just talk. We understood each other. We were like sisters, a relationship I had never really had before. But the memories are so distant now, almost as if they were a dream, too good to be true.
Today my "friends" are living for themselves. And I have chosen to live a life "worthy of the call." It has been so hard to let them go. I miss them and who they are. There are days when I am weak and all I want to do is call them up and go out with them and have a good time. But what would that accomplish? Do I love them enough to let them go?
I've had to remind myself this week that as much as they hurt me they hurt God even more. I forget sometimes that He doesn't just blow them off and not care about what they are doing. He is "not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance."
So, I have lost the ones I love in exchange for following the One who loves me most. I will press into Him because His love is perfect. All I can do now is pray it up and be ready.
~*Hannah*~
PS - Thank you for the comments and encouragement! Yes, we had Cats auditions last week. I didn't get a lead, just a spot in the chorus, but that's okay.
I will update more often from now on!
Comments
Oct. 7, 2005 - Beautiful post, Honey.
Posted by underhiswings
He is worth it.
"Peter began to say to Him, "Behold, we have left everything and followed You."
Jesus said, "Truly I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or farms, for My sake and for the gospel's sake, but that he will receive a hundred times as much now in the present age, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and farms, along with persecutions; and in the age to come, eternal life." Mark 10:28-30
I love you.
Oct. 7, 2005 - You've Gained a Friend for Life!
Posted by devdoordeborah
This post was so incredible. You may feel like you have lost earthly friends, but you have a friend that sitcks closer than a brother and you have found Him! A friend for life! One that will never leave you nor forsake you. You can't get any closer than that! Your love for the Lord permeates your post and I was totally blessed to read it. Thank you for sharing your life in such a pesonal way. Keep pressing into Him!
Deborah Wuehler
Devotional Editor
The Old Schoolhouse Magazine
Oct. 7, 2005 - Hi Hannah...
Posted by ejoyce,ink
I remember being a teenager...even though it's quite a while ago! Unfortunately I was much more like your "friends" than like you. You have so much wisdom and godly maturity. Please continue to love and pray for your friends. God is not finished with them yet...and be good to yourself too..He's got so much in store for you. Your writing is beautiful, and I hope you keep posting regularly. In His Peace, Eleanor
