Oct. 23, 2006 - Fall is in the air...
and the walls are begining to close in. :) OK, I'll admit I live in a mild climate where freezing happens only a few times winter. I really don't mind the freezing, in fact, I enjoy it. What I mind are the cold drizzly winter rains, the fog (especially the Tule), and the fact that it can be overcast for days, even weeks. After living on the East Coast for 7 years, I find I miss it. A lot. I miss the acutal seasons, the snow, the warm summer rains accompianied by amazing thunder storms. The storms tended to come fast and leave fast and sunshine prevailed. I miss the snow that the sunlight dances upon making things bright and cheery as well and a little more fun! But...here I am, looking for the sugar to make some lemonade. :) We are currently living with my in-laws while my dh looks for a position, and though I love them dearly I am really craving my own space, not in a selfish way I don't think, just to have room to breathe, more emotional down time, time and space to keep my own schedule particularly as it relates to HSing where interruptions are much fewer. No mattter how one may try, living with someone else results in changes in how you function. It can't be helped. I am grateful for a place to be, but I also I so look fwd to getting back to me. I just don't feel as nurturing towards my family while I live with others, and nurturing is something I've had to learn. After 6 months I'll admit to really struggling and throwing a few tantrums. I'm finding it more and more difficult to let go of the small irritations relating to my living situation. But I sure have learned how selfish my own heart can be, and I don't approve. I totally agree with "bloom where you are planted" but I am struggling, I'll admit. We have averaged a move every year for 14 years. I'm tired and I just want to settle somewhere ANYwhere in my own house.
But there is hope! Dh is currently looking for a position teaching at the college level and there are a number of promising prospects. Though, since such jobs are tied to the academic year, we are easily looking at an additional 6-9 months where we are. More if a job does not materialize. We are really praying and trusting that he can get a position that will support our family, not always an easy thing to get in the arts.
Well, children are waking and I must run....
