Communication FUNdamentals

May. 15, 2006

7 Tongue Stopping Techniques

I got my copy of Teach Magazine this weekend and inside was a very interesting article.  Under Sharing Jesus in Everyday Situations was the article "Oh No, You Don't!" about Lorrie's grandmother's illness and how she remembers to hold her tongue when she is upset about details of her care.  She listed 7 Tongue Stopping Techniques to control what comes out of your mouth when you are frustrated, angry or impatient.  I won't go into all the details she wrote about but here is the list with my commentary: 1. Count to Ten This really does help you to stop and think before you reply. 2. Smile Smiling communicates that you are friendly and sincere in what you are saying.  3. Watch Your Tone of Voice Your words can be sweet, but if you say it with a bad attitude, you can appear to be sarcastically saying the opposite of what you had intended. 4. Rein in Your Attitude Again, you attitude comes through in your tone of voice so watch your attitude as well. 5. Remember Nonverbal Communication If your words are sweet, but you look as if you are mad, you will communicate the opposite of what you intend.  People know that people lie so they watch body language and facial expressions to see if they are consistant with the words.  Many times this speaks more to your meaning than your words do! 6. Try Asking a Question This is actually very good advice!  If you ask a question, the listener feels you are giving them due attention and it can defuse the matter right there.  People like to be listened to and many times only get upset when they feel they aren't getting through.  Sometimes people are happy to be heard even if they other person doesn't agree with what they've said. 7. Do the unexpected Here she talks about saying you will bring cookies next time or offering to help them.  You get more bees with honey than with vinegar.  Being nice when there is a disagreement can totally change the other persons perspective.  Many times people see the disagreer-especially in the middle of the disagreement-as someone to defend against, someone all wrong.  If they see a glimmer of goodness, it can totally change how they look at things. From JoJo's Purple Crayon...   Say What You Mean Series of          Communication FUNdamentals for Christians PreK-Adult

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May. 15, 2006 - hold your tongue

Posted by belindaletchford

Isn't this a great list - as I read it through I couldn't help but think that it was a great list for the mum! How often we have to watch these very things as we deal with our children. Though I know we have to say "no" to them, we have to correct and train them in right choices how much more fruitful our efforts would be if we watched our tongue.

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