Country Mom of 4 - Chipmunk Loving Boa Wearing Men in Faded Black Jeans

... Country Mom of Four ...

Mar. 8, 2007
Chipmunk Loving Boa Wearing Men in Faded Black Jeans

I had insomnia last night, and while I was counting sheep, my mind wandered off into things that scare me. Not in a scary monster under the bed type of scary, but "scary" on a different level. I'll see if I can remember some of them.......

1. Hillary Clinton

2. Twinkie Filling

3. 1980's Passenger Vans

4. Women with lots of earrings up in one ear, with short boy hair, and too tight faded black jeans (these items must all be existing TOGETHER to qualify as scary, except the tight faded black jeans, those stand on their own).

5. Fast Food

6. Convenience Store Burritos (heck lets just say convenience stores)

7. The rising house market

8. Loose Borders

9. Mega Churches (ooh, I hear toes crunching) BTW, I'm not saying there is anything wrong with them here, I'm just saying they scare me!

10. Unruly Dogs

11. Laundry

12. Store bought meat, spinach, strawberries, peanut butter, etc. It's good to have a healthy fear of FDA cutbacks and the unhealthy elimination practises of migrant workers...GROSS

13. Hollywood "Stars" and where they put their money

14. Men in boas and butterfly hair clips (I saw a bit of cable last week... enough said)

15. Feminists

16. Calories (my fear of all food might help this)

17. Bikers (no, not men on Harleys, but people on BIKES. You know, with those tight little yellow shorts, and those pointy hats, and they always are in the middle of the road on dangerous curves, or zooming by you when you are trying to run., and they travel in SWARMS... did I mention the little yellow shorts? Oh, I so need therapy.)

18. Carnies

19. Chipmunks (bad camping experiences)

20. People who wear those funny little phone things attached to their heads ALL the time. I went to a party the other night and some one had one on, then at the homeschool meeting a lady had one on too! At first I thought that they were some high tech hearing aid, but when I found out they were phones, all I could think was DUMB. For work, fine, what ever, but in social settings? Could ya get any tackier?

OK, I've come to the conclusion i could go on with this list FOREVER, so maybe I better stop before I've offended all the chipmunk loving boa wearing men in faded black jeans!

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Mar. 8, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by EEEEMommy

I'm offended! Oh wait, I'm not a man, I don't have any faded black jeans, and I hate boas....Never mind!

It's funny the things that run through your mind when you ought to be sleeping!
My mind is blank at this moment, but as soon as I lay down tonight, I imagine it will be flooded with a dozen things that scare me too! :) THANKS! ;)

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Mar. 8, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Rachelle

#4 and #17 were hilariously funny. As for the phone headsets...I'm with you. Seriously tacky.

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Mar. 8, 2007 - Let me help you out here!

Posted by loefflermom

"Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is praiseworthy - think about such things." Philippians 4:8

People is tight jeans and little yellow bike shorts are too scary!

:) How funny!

Have a blessed day!

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Mar. 9, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by nsremom

Convenience store burritos. LOLOL. Or any 'prepared' foods that they try to lure you to buy. EWWWWW.

funny list. I agree with many of them. Feminists? yep.

I'm having a contest that you might help on. Little miss mover.

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Mar. 9, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by SeekingJESUSnTeachingKIDS

That is one funny list!! It is amazing the things that we think of at times. Some of your scary things created images in my mind and yes scary is a good way to describe them. :}
:>Michelle

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Mar. 10, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by grace4gayle

Girl, you need some sleep! Um, I kind of want to hear the chipmunk story!

Gayle

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Mar. 10, 2007 - from fringey

Posted by Anonymous

Stop! Now you are scaring me! You forgot microwave radiation ...:)

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Mar. 11, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by AHappyHome

I saw an ad for a t-shirt that said, "Re-Defeat Communism" with Hilly's face on it. 'Nuff said.

Blessings,
Keri

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Mar. 15, 2007 - Scary things

Posted by castlekids

You have a great sense of humor!
~Jenny

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Mar. 15, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by callmekate

What's a Carnie? (I don't know, maybe I've been living in a cave.) In my opinion, people who go around wearing those stupid phones look like something from Mars. Especially men over 50. Please! Try quoting scripture, I am finding that helps stop those late night scary thoughts that keep me awake.

Kate

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Mar. 24, 2007 - HAHA

Posted by Bahamahomeschooler