(Let me preface this as an addendum with the disclaimer that I should never read Voice of the Martyrs and then think about fruitcake. Even though I really do not like fruitcake, I'm not asking that you give up yours. That would be more of a Christianity-should-be-banned-in-non-Christian-countries type of thinking.)
I don't like fruitcake.
I've never tried a fruitcake that tasted good.
Therefore, I don't believe in fruitcake.
And since I don't like it
or believe in it
then you shouldn't have any, either.
We should just ban fruitcake.

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Several years ago we helped a friend clean out a house that his great uncle had left to him. We found a large ceramic barrel which had wrapped fruit cakes in them. We're guessing they had been in there for years. I guess the "best" fruitcakes are "aged" and THEN eaten. Yuck.