I'm curious to know your reaction to the latest episode of Wife Swap. A homeschool Mom from Texas swapped families with a Realtor for two weeks. The Realtor didn't spend much time with her kids and they complained that she wouldn't turn off her cellphone and placated them by buying them things.
The Realtor Mom talked about how weird it was for them to homeschool however, she did realize that she needed to spend more time with her own children and made concessions when she got back home. She realized she didn't need 2 homes for her family to appreciate her hard work. She wound up respecting the homeschool Mom's dedication to her family.
The homeschool mom spent 24/7 with her kids and didn't let them go anywhere alone. She was portrayed as a weirdo. I don't think her behavior was strange considering how many registered sex offenders there are in Texas and all around the country. I was nearly abducted at the age of 3! If I had not seen a policeman, I would have gotten in the car with a stranger. That was in 1972! I'm very careful with my child and it's not paranoia.
There are enough homeschoolers now to voice our opinions and make a difference. I encourage everyone who saw the show and found it distasteful to write or email abc.com to voice their opinions. Let them know that we're not strange because we care about our children's education and take responsibility for it.
I'm really sick of all these shows that portray morally bankrupt people who are wealthy as successful people.
Let me know your thoughts.
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I've had the hardest time getting my son to do chores - even for an allowance. When we started homeschooling, I suggested a Home Economics Class. At first he was opposed to the idea. Then I explained that when he grows up he will be in charge of his household. Living as a bachelor he can choose how he wants to run his home. I said that we could learn to do all kinds of things in different ways and he could choose the best way for him.
He LOVED that idea. My child loves to learn anything provided he has a choice in some part of it. He sat down and made me a list of the things he wanted to learn first.
1. How to wash dishes in the sink and dishwasher to discover which method cleans dishes better.
2. How to wash clothes
3. How to cook on the stovetop and in the oven. He had already mastered the microwave. He's been nagging me to buy a "Chocolate Factory" and "Betty Crocker Bake and Fill" off TV.
Home Economics is the only class he wants 7 days a week. I don't have to ask him because he asks me everyday! He loves loading the diswasher, washing the dishes and putting dishes up in the cabinet. He's totally enamored of organizing everything he comes in contact with. He loves to plan meals as well. He likes the Iron Chef TV Show and says he knows girls like boys who can cook for them!
Washing clothes also is now fun for him. He puts a red shirt in every load just to make sure I'm paying attention. If I don't catch it then he takes it out.
Cooking on the stove top which has been on his list of things to learn since he was 4 has now been accomplished! I watch over him but he knows what he's doing. Corned Beef Hash is his new specialty. It's the only thing I could keep down during my pregnancy and has always been one of his favorites.
He tells me that learning these things has made him feel proud of himself and more grown up. Nobody else lets him near a stove. I realize he is responsible and want him to learn to be independent.
I'm glad I decided to homeschool for many reasons and this is one of them. When he was in school he was always telling me he couldn't do things because he wasn't old enough. Being allowed to blossom as an individual has turned him back into that creative child I dropped off in Kindergarten. I was worried I wouldn't see him again.
Being a single parent is sometimes challenging but it also has many rewards. I haven't had to contend with a Father who wants to toughen him up or hold him up to some macho stereotype. He has 3 uncles and a Grandfather who are a good influence on him.
I haven't had to deal with his biological father's chauvenistic personality being imposed on my son. If I had this Home Economics would be verboten!
I know my job as a parent will be for a lifetime but I think ingrained co-dependence is crippling. I hope that when he grows up he will want to be my friend. My job as I view it is to prepare him to go out into the world and live his own life which I hope he will include me in.
My relationship with my controlling Mother is strained at best primarily because she treats me like a 5 year old, often telling me what I should have said or done in every situation. That's not the path I want to take with my child. I was never allowed to pick out my own clothes or have a choice in anything I did while I lived in her house. Therefore, I couldn't wait to leave her house. I have 3 brothers who don't have any idea how to live alone or properly take care of themselves. They stay in unhealthy relationships based on their low self-esteem and learned helplessness. This is due to my Mother's fear of being alone. This type of passive-aggresive co-dependent behavior is unhealthy and emotionally crippling to children. These patterns don't end in adulthood.
Using my family as an example of what NOT to do, I want my child to be emotionally healthy so I am teaching him self-reliance at an early age. He can stay with me as long as he needs to since the American job market will probably be nonexistent when he grows up but it won't be because he thinks he can't make it in the world.
One never knows how long they will spend on this planet. If I died tomorrow, I'd feel better knowing I taught him some important things first. Everyday is an opportunity to teach him a helpful lesson.
In closing, let me know your experiences with chores and household responsibilities. You're a creative bunch and I enjoy reading about your adventures!
After spending all my pregnancy and parenting years reading books about parenting, child development, and homeschooling I began to wonder what children learn from traveling. I know I've learned a great deal and always want more.
I didn't do any traveling more myself until my son was 4 years old. I felt too guilty leaving him behind. I also didn't want to miss anything. I've always loved traveling and actually considered it as a profession several times. In fact, I applied to American Airlines in August of 2001. Naturally, I was relieved I changed my mind in September 2001.
I had always wanted to travel with my child when he was mature enough. He's hyperactive and will talk to strangers if he finds them remotely interesting. Once in a grocery store he asked me for a quarter for a huge gumball machine. I told him no since toothbrushing was not his top priority. As I was writing my check he swaggered back to me chewing a huge gumball. I asked where he got it since they cost a quarter. He said, "I told that lady over there you can't afford to buy me a gumball so she bought one for me!" Then he smiled and said, "See, I can have gum any time I want it." I was mortified. Now you know what I'm dealing with. He was maybe 4 at the time. Another time at age 5, he ran off in a department store. I was crying and screaming his name. Visions of Adam Walsh flashed in my head. I found him in the Junior department flirting with a saleslady he had charmed a quarter out of. After that taking him to a store conjured up high anxiety for me so I would drop him off at Grandma's where she loaded him up with sugar until my arrival.
This summer, I decided to take the plunge. He's 8 now and doesn't wander off as much. My sister and I thought we could handle the challenge. We drove from Texas to Orlando to give the Disney Corporation all our money. My sister and I generally travel together because we share the same birthday. We usually travel to Vegas together or the occasional cruise.
My son was thrilled when we arrived in New Orleans to spend the night. We walked down to Jimmy Buffet's Margaritaville for dinner and pointed out all the sights to him. He asked tons of questions about the city, it's history and all the interesting characters we saw on a Monday night.
We talked to him about how America is an open country and other countries are not. We also discussed the possibility that it may not always stay open. He had some kid's travel books and games and an atlas. Every time we drove through a new state he looked up the state song, bird and motto and we talked about other trips we had taken to each state before he was born.
We kept score of how many different state license plates we saw on cars. He wanted to know if we had been there and what that trip was like.
He slept a lot but when we got out of the car to check into a hotel he headed straight for the pool. Exercise is my friend! Locking up a hyperactive child in a car can be hard to endure. We swam for hours each night until the pools closed. Then he would sleep at night.
Disney World as fun of course. My second trip but my first time as a parent. It's much more fun when your child is there to experience it. I gave my son a disposable camera of his own to take pictures without my interference. They were good as well as interesting. They didn't come out like Rainman's Picures which is what I expected.
The ride back was a drag to him and he suggest flying next time. That was my suggestion all along.
All in all the trip was a success and he learned from his new experiences. I'd love to take him to all the National Parks if I could afford it. Our trip ended about a week before Hurricane Katrina so I was glad he got to see New Orleans before the storm. I had been there many times before and already had some great memories.
It's amazing how much joy he got out of riding in a Taxi. That's one of the great benefits of parenting, enjoying the little things you take for granted as an adult. We didn't travel much when I was a kid. With 5 kids in our family our parents struggled to pay bills and there wasn't much luxury. I couldn't wait to get out and experience the world on my own terms.
We may be going on a trip this December around his birthday. We haven't been anywhere that it snows during winter together so that should be a big treat. I'll let you know what he learns from the next trip!
Let me know what travel experiences you've shared with your children and which ones they've learned the most from. I'm curious to know about your experiences traveling with kids.
By now we've probably all seen that DHL commercial about customer service. The total lack of customer service and common courtesy is a HUGE pet peeve of mine. The sad part is that the commerical isn't a stretch of the imagination. It shows some annoying scenarios but not really the crux of the problem.
I started working in Retail while I was going to college so I could work flexible hours. Twenty years ago more people were working in retail stores. Now you're walking into a ghost town! Corporate America wasn't quite as greedy as it is now possibly because when a customer was offended they would make a nasty stink and write a letter. We need to reacquaint managers and store owners with the phrase, "The Customer is always Right."
It's highly irritating to walk into a store and have some slack jawed idiot tell me they can't answer any of my questions. Now I just avoid salespeople completely if I can.
People in general in this country are apathetic and disconnected. It doesn't cost anything to be nice to somebody.
I read a disturbing essay in an airline flight magazine recently that said the entire industry is only going to offer customer service if people are willing to PAY for it! They aren't concerned about a few people getting irate because they don't have that many options anymore. The gist of the article was that airline passengers are a captive audience and if they don't like it, we won't let them fly on our airline! The audacity is simply outrageous.
Word of mouth is still a major factor in people's choice of all consumer products. If advertisers could control of it they would.
When you're upset, don't just complain to a Manager - If you can find one working. Write a letter to the corporate office. It's much more effective.
Here's an example of my latest shopping trip. I went to Stein Mart - one of my favorite stores. I bought a huge amount of merchandise. The checker asked an Assistant Manager to help some people check out but she refused. She was busy talking to another employee. She called for another checker who never came. My son walked behind the checker and the Mgr. came over to tell my son he couldn't stand behind her. I voiced my opinion of her general rudeness and laziness and asked for the Manager who wasn't working. I got home and the checker left one of those huge security tags on a jacket I bought! I was livid at her incompetence and their poor treatment of me.
Three weeks later, I went to another location and had it removed. I bought more merchandise. Instead of putting my new merchandise in a new hanging bag, the checker threw them in my old bag. It's a simple thing but it was irritating. How lazy do you have to be to get hired in retail nowadays? If I had done that while working retail, I would have got written up.
Little things mean alot when people are spending hard earned money. I could have got to Wal-Mart like the rest of the lemmings on the planet but I oppose their business practices and their anti-union agenda.
The worst one I've had recently is AAA sending an Independent Contractor to change my tire who coincidentally was obviously an illegal alien because he didn't speak English. He stripped 2 lug nuts and left so fast he sprayed gravel all over my car. AAA told me it was my problem and I had to deal with the Independent Contractor. AAA said they don't provide AAA employees to provide roadside service. Then why am I paying membership fees to AAA? I was stuck without transportation for 3 days which included a weekend and had to get new lug nuts from a car dealership! I'm still furious.
Let me know if you've had similar experiences or if it's just me.
Last November I was dealing with my brother's hospitalization and took a break to see this movie. It was just what I needed. Wathching him suffer made me reconsider all the choices I'd made it my life and we discussed at length how his choices had brought him to that hospital room. I loved this movie and highly recommend it! You can get it now on amazon.com.
It shows an angry woman going through her day and shows how her body is affected by her moods. It's very unique and thought provoking. I don't want to give anything away so check it out and let me know your thoughts.
They also have a website: www.whatthebleep.com
Living on the Gulf Coast I never worried about hurricane season until this year. I hadn't even given it a thought for over a decade. After preparing for and being forced from my home due to Mandatory Evacuation I vow to always keep stocked with supplies and keep extra money in my savings.
Another thing I'm doing is putting all my pictures on my computer. I loaded all my important documents on a jump drive before we had to leave but it would not take my pictures. I've always been a shutterbug and took several photography classes in college. I loved spending hours in the darkroom creating what I thought were works of art. Everyone I know suffers from chronic flashburn!
It's a strange feeling choosing what items you can't replace in the event of a natural disaster. I've already experienced a house fire but luckily a good samaritan came to my rescue and used my fire extinguisher to put it out. The only things I would really miss were my yearbooks which contain notes from friends who have passed away and pictures of my child's development. Part of me rationalized that it's all stuff and stuff can be replaced but my family cannot. Part of me was sad and another part was in denial.
The strange thing is that most of those items are still in a plastic box in the back seat of my car. Hurricane Season doesn't end until November 30th. I suppose it just reminded me of life's impermanence.
While packing to run away from a storm a scene from a movie flashed in my mind. I can't recall the name at the moment but a child is taken to India because he may a reincarnation of the Dalailama. A Buddhist Monk takes him on a roof top and they stand for a few moments studying the scene of a bizarre and all the people hustling and bustling through the streets. He turns to the child and tells him, "Everyone you see now will be dead in 100 years. Everyone will be gone."
It reinforced my feeling that you should always be kind to those you hold dear. We never know when our time on Earth will draw to a close. While I'm here, I want people to know I care and that I appreciate them. It's hard to forgive and forget when someone has hurt us but regret feels like wearing leg irons, it weighs on you and constricts you.
I'm a very outspoken person and lack self-editing when angered. I try to work on it everyday. Sometimes I drive people away but I'm working on that too. Being reminded how fragile life is has been a blessing for me.
Growing up in the 1970's, when I only got to watch cartoons for a full day on Saturday and Sunday the shows I learned the most from were School House Rock. I looked forward to those 3 minute stories more than my favorite cartoons. Sorry Scooby! About 10 years ago they were sold in their entirety on VHS video. Longing for nostalgia, I naturally bought them all.
This was when I was just a favorite aunt and never thought I would become a parent, much less a single parent. I had my own stash of kid movies, books and toys. I told everyone they were for the kids but truthfully, I got the movies for myself. I taught my neice and three nephews lots of things but they retained the most from School House Rock. They are all grown up now and it happened in the blink of an eye.
After switching over to mostly DVD's, I went through a box of videos and found my old favorite and played it for my son who loved it. He walks around the house singing all the songs. I love the fact that he knows about adjectives and adverbs and how a bill becomes a law!
I recently read "The tipping Point" which talks about many things that become fads and iconic in pop culture. It examines how kids learn from Sesame Street and Blue's Clues because they become contagious like a song you can't get out of your head. I loved Sesame Street as a child and watched it with my child and neice and nephews.
My main objective in teaching my son is keeping learning fun and interesting. It's amazing how much a child can learn when it isn't a chore.
During my childhood, I gravitated toward books because they allowed me to mentally escape from a violent home environment. When I didn't have a book, I read the dictionary and loved learning new words. I could use my imagination and go anywhere to escape the arguments roaring outside my door. I've talked at length with my child about the power of language and we always carry a Dictionary in the car in case he gets bored on a long trip.
While I watch C-Span with him and explain how each law will affect our lives he's bored watching but enjoys discussing how bills are written and legislated. When he watches School House Rock he's enthralled. Then he makes up songs of his own to remember things he's learned.
He loves my Muppet Show videos too and loves all the wordplay. I'm glad I'm able to provide wholesome entertainment for him that also feeds his mind.
I'll be forever greatful to PBS and ABC for spending time and energy on programming for kids. If I knew the person's name behind School House Rock, I'd send a thank you note.
Please let me know if your children have had the same response to School House Rock. Inquiring minds want to know!
After watching the mayhem unfold after Hurrican Katrina and discussing it with my son he went to his room and came back with boxes of toys and clothes that he wanted to donate to displaced children now residing in Houston. I was proud of him and profoundly touched by his generosity. He even suggested adopting a child who had lost his or her parents in the storm. He preferred a brother since we've already got boy stuff he could share.
I talk to him often about people less fortunate than us and how we may someday need help. I always talk to him about the importance of recycling and protecting the environment and I was delighted that he took it to heart.
One month later we were ordered to evacuate in anticipation of Hurricane Rita. We were sitting in gridlock on I-45 and my son suggested giving some food and water to people in a car next to us because they looked hungry.
Part of being a good citizen is caring about other people and being willing to perform random acts of kindness. I'm happy that I have been able to teach him these things and he surprises me and makes me proud everyday. It's not something I said or did intentionally to teach him to be a good citizen or a good person. He just followed my example.
I'm a chronic insomniac so I see lots of infomercials and most of them are a waste of time. A little over a year ago, I was burning the numbers off the remote and stopped on one for Eye Q. Pam Dawber was the spokesperson and I paused long enough to lament her career decline then got interested in the product. I actually bought Eye Q because it teaches speed reading. I bought it for myself but my son got interested in it as well.
You only have to use it three times a week for 7 minutes and it increases your reading speed by 20%! You also get a CD with 100 greatest books and 100 greatest people who ever lived. I love to learn something new everyday and it has also taught my son some great things.
I highly recommend it and it was well worth the money. You can check out a demo at www.INFmind.com.