• Dec. 31, 2005
Running the Race Spiritually Naked
HAPPY NEW YEAR! Have you made your New Years resolution yet? I had to quit making “New Years Resolutions” because I failed so badly at them that I didn’t see the point anymore. Now I call it “Re-evaluating.” I look at my kids & our daily routine and see what is working & what isn’t. So far I have only tweaked the schedule & not thrown out any kids. J I look at our school schedule & curriculum & see what needs to be thrown out & what needs to be kept. Am I over committed at church or anywhere else? What is adding life to our day and what is taking away? What is enhancing my relationship with the Lord and what isn’t? Re-evaluating is something that doesn’t wait for January 1st. For me, it has to happen on a regular basis.
Hebrews 12:1, 2 says “Since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.” (NIV)
I’ve had this verse on my bathroom mirror for a long time because it is my reminder to re-evaluate what I’m doing. What is hindering me and keeping me from running the race marked out for me. Are my eyes fixed on Jesus or on my hectic schedule that is wreaking havoc on me and my family? Another translation for this verse used the word encumbrance instead of hindering, so I looked it up. The literal Greek meaning for this is; “whatever is prominent, protuberance, bulk, mass, hence a burden, weight, and encumbrance.” I really liked this definition because this is what it feels like when something is hindering me from doing what I know I need to do. I feel a big burden or weight on myself and I can’t function right until I throw it off. In Bible times do you remember how they ran their races? Yes, they were naked or at least nearly naked so that they could run without their clothes getting in the way, or hindering them. God wants us spiritually naked. A funny thought I know. Another thought on this is that sometimes it isn’t a bad thing that is hindering us it just is not the right time for it. Many years ago I was very involved in our church. I taught Sunday School, children’s choir and served on a few committees. What I was doing was really good, but my family was really suffering. I was just getting started in homeschooling and I had 6 children, 6 years old and less. I was overwhelmed to say the least. I didn’t know how to say “no” to anyone except my family. God finally got a hold of me and l let go of everything except the Sunday School class. I refocused my day on my husband, children, and our school and was amazed at how free I felt. I learned to fix my eyes on Jesus and I began to run with perseverance to him.
In the context of this verse the literal meaning for “fixed” is “to turn the eyes away from other things and fix them on something”. Those who know me best will understand my next statement. This makes me think of chocolate cake. If I have my eyes fixed on chocolate cake it is really hard for me to resist it. Chocolate is one of my favorite foods. I totally believe that one of these days it will show up in the basic food groups and I also think it will be in heaven for all to enjoy(no worries about calories), O’K, maybe there won’t be chocolate in heaven. But it is a nice thought. J Back to my point, I’m not as willing to eat the chocolate if I have my eyes fixed elsewhere. Maybe the old adage “Out of site, out of mind.” fits here. Spiritually speaking, if my eyes are fixed on Jesus then they are turned away from the other things that hinder me from walking with him. It is when we take our eyes off of him and fix them on other things that we begin to allow things into our day and life that bring disorder and burden. If our eyes are fixed on things of this world then they cannot be fixed on Jesus. What are your spiritual eyes fixed on? How are you running the race? Sometimes I feel like I am running like a bunch of 4 year olds playing soccer & no one really cares where the goal is or that they should be running towards it. When my eyes are fixed on Jesus then I have a purpose and goal to run towards. I know the purpose our family has and the direction our school is to take to achieve that purpose.
As we all begin a new year my prayer is that we can all take a step back and re-evaluate our lives with spiritual eyes. Instead of making New Year resolutions once a year we can learn be confidant that through God’s grace we are able to start all over and refocus every day.
Psalm 19:14, “Lord, may the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart be pleasing in your eyes. You are my Rock and my Redeemer.” (NIV)
© Copyright 2005, Dana Bailey
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• Dec. 23, 2005
Mary, the Lords' Most Obediant Servant
This was written last year(2004) as I waited for my baby girl to arrive.
As I sit to write this I am 5 days past due to have a baby and with Christmas quickly coming my thoughts can't help but fall on Mary and when she was expecting Baby Jesus. Did she wonder as I do, "Will this baby ever get here?" As each day continues to pass without me having a baby I try to remember what Isaiah 40:29 & 31 says,
"He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; he offers strength to the weak. But those who wait on the Lord will find new strength. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint."
I know that at this point I would love to walk and not feel faint. I just have to wait. So, I wonder how Mary felt, especially on that horrible donkey ride to
"I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
I have often wondered if she questioned God's plan & purpose in choosing her to be the mother of the Messiah. All she wanted to do was get married like other "normal" Jewish girls and here she is being visited by an angel announcing that she will carry & deliver the long anticipated Messiah. Her plans weren't that outrageous...were they? Why couldn't she just have a normal life? Did she wonder these things?
I had a plan for my future once, but it didn't really pan out the way I expected. My plan involved a career in music. I wanted to sing, write, & teach music. I wanted the perfect house with the perfect husband & 2.5 kids. My plans came to a screeching halt when God brought Mr. Wonderful into my life before I even had a chance to enroll in a college. At 18 years old I was engaged, then married & at 19 years old I was a mother. "Hello God, I like my plans better!" Now here I am waiting for labor to begin with my 9th child. Boy, did God have a different plan for me! What an abundant life he has given me. My plan was all about me & what I wanted, not even considering what God wanted for me. "...plans to prosper you and not to harm you..." God, are you sure about this? Nine kids sound pretty harmful to me.
I'm sure that Mary may have questioned this new plan the angel had revealed to her. But we know that she had a servant’s heart and wanted to be obedient even in the things she didn't understand. "Mary responded, 'I am the Lord's servant, and I am willing to accept whatever he wants. May everything you have said come true.’ Then the angel left."
As the holidays get closer many find that their "plans" of the year did not work out very well. Many have found themselves unemployed, or they may be employed but are still facing serious financial struggles. It is hard to see God's plans to prosper us when we don't feel very prosperous. Our children are making their Christmas lists and we are wondering how we will get them anything, much less what is on the list. Maybe your family has experienced a traumatic loss, event or sickness & the stress of the holidays is almost too much to think about right now. For us to be able to meditate on The Word and believe that He does know the plans he has for us & that they are plans to prosper us and not to harm us, they are plans to give us hope and a future; this takes great faith. I truly believe that God chose Mary to be the mother of Jesus because of her great faith. It is a faith that she may not have even realized she was capable of. He knew that even though she didn't completely understand why she was chosen she would rise to the call and raise Jesus according to God's plan. He knew that she would be unwavering in spite of what her relatives & friends would say. He also knew that she would have doubts, but would still obey.
As I put the finishing touches on this column I am now holding the baby I was so impatiently waiting for. She was 7 days late, but now that she is here the wait was well worth it. I look at her and wonder about her future. God knows my heart and how badly I want to raise and nurture Gracie to become a mighty woman of God. I don't worry about her future, but I do pray that the part I play will be according to God's perfect will & plan for her. I want to be a part of it, not interference in it. I know that Mary had to wonder some of these same things as she looked into the face of her new baby. Any plans she had made for herself faded at the sight of this newborn. As a mother, I know that experience. God's plan for me is so much bigger than I will ever realize & every adversity & hardship that I experience only brings me closer to his perfect purpose.
I hope that you can be thankful during this season for his plan and purpose for you. Rejoice in the fact that he is alive and working in your life. Thank God for Mary and her willingness to obey beyond her understanding. Remember the hope that we can find in Mary's life as Jesus mother. Celebrate in knowing that just as he chose Mary to carry out his special plan, He has also chosen you for a specific purpose in His plan. I’m so thankful that God can see past my doubts & fears and see my true potential as his servant.
This will be an extra special Christmas for my family as we not only celebrate the birth of Christ but also the precious gift of our Baby Gracie. There is nothing like having a newborn around to bring life back into perspective. We are a little more aware of what a miracle new life is. Gracie was not part of my first plan, but I'm so thankful that she was part of God's plan. Even at just a few days old she is already a huge blessing to our family. I pray that you feel & experience the blessings of Christ during this Christmas season of 2004.
© Copyright 2004, Dana Bailey
Jeremiah 29:13
"I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
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• Dec. 23, 2005
Your Children and Christmas
I often get asked what I do to emphasize Christ during Christmas with my children. For several years now we have taken a break from school during most of the month of December if not all of the month. But we don’t stop the learning completely. I use the month of December to dig deeper into the reason that Jesus was born; so that he could die for us. Once I began doing this the excitement for presents hasn’t seemed so great. It is still great, just not as great as before. Once you truly understand why he was born you don’t really want anything for yourself anymore.
There are a few things we do every year and I am always looking for more. One of the things we do is a Christmas Chain. This is 25 pieces of either Christmas wrapping paper or construction paper that is cut into strips. You are counting down to Christmas Day. On each piece we write something special to do that day. One thing we write down is people to pray for. We start off with our family (not many pieces left now). When we take off a piece that has “Pray for _______” on it we all gather together in the Living Room & that person sits in the middle while we gather around them & we each take turns praying a prayer of praise over that person. Other suggestions to write on the paper are baking goodies for friends, learn or sing a Christmas hymn & read the story behind it or decorate the tree. Whatever you come up with they will love.
Something else we do is during our morning devotions we slowly go through the story in the Bible (Luke 2) of when Jesus was born. As we read we build our nativity with the wise men coming last. This has helped my youngest ones learn the real story and find out that Santa Claus didn’t bring toys to baby Jesus.
We enjoy decorating 3 Christmas trees. They are small and slender so they don’t take up a lot of room, no more room than one big one. Each tree has a theme. One tree is a tree of memories & blessings. This one is for our ornaments that remind us good times in the past and God’s rich blessings in our lives. Baby’s first ornaments, ornaments picked up on various trips and of course homemade ones too. The middle tree is the tallest & it is our tree of Christian symbols. We have a lot of nativity and angel ornaments. There is a nail hanging on the tree and I would like to find a crown of thorns. The last tree is the smallest one as it is the least important. This is the Winter Wonderland tree. It has snowmen and reindeer, nostalgic Santa Claus and more.
In the past we have done unit type studies on Christmas symbols (tree, candy cane, etc…) and how we see Christ in all of them. We have studied the hymns and hymn writers. My kids enjoyed learning hymns that I sang as a kid but they had never heard before. We have read about St. Nicholas and the ministry he had in the early 800’s.
This year we will study on the history of Christmas. Did you know that in the 17th century Oliver Cromwell and his Puritan forces took over
Here are a few websites that I found that I will use for our study.
History of Christmas links:
http://www.holidays.net/christmas/story.htm
http://www.historychannel.com/exhibits/holidays/christmas/
http://www.christmas-time.com/cp-hist.html
http://www.locksley.com/6696/xmas.htm
http://www.christianitytoday.com/holidays/christmas/features/charticles.html
Back to our kids. I realized one year I was not teaching my kids the true meaning of Christmas when I asked, “Why do we celebrate Christmas?” and the answer I got was ,”To get presents!” I just about fainted then I felt sick. What had I done? I began at that time refocusing why we celebrate Christmas and how we do it. We love to decorate our house & sing Christmas songs & hymns and look at Christmas lights. But, it can’t over shadow the reality that Jesus came to die for our sins so we wouldn’t have to. What a gift that is! We face that gift everyday when we confess our sins and we receive forgiveness. If the decorations and such begin to be more important we get rid of it. Deut 8 reminds us not to forget what the Lord God has done for us or else we become proud. We try to be aware of God’s grace and mercy everyday, but Christmas has become for us a major “YEAH GOD!” party. The Israelites celebrated various feasts to pay honor to different times God had saved them. This is one of our “feasts.” It is a special time for us as a family to remember how God miraculously provided for us during the year. The presents and decorations are just extra’s but not required. That is not where our joy of Christmas lies.
I pray that as we enter into the Holy Day Season that you & your family celebrate God’s amazing love & sacrifice for you.
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• Nov. 12, 2005
Waves
There once was a woman who lived near the ocean. She could see it from her front deck and loved to watch the waves come in and hit the rock cliff. She was a good woman and she did many great things. She was very successful at most anything she did. Her father told her many times growing up, "You can do anything that you want to do if you only try hard enough." She remembered that advice as she grew up and started a career.
One day as she watched the waves rolling in she thought, "I can do anything, even become stronger than the waves, so she decided to try. She climbs down the rock cliff and walked out from behind the rocks and stood there on the beach at the waters edge. The tide began to roll in and the water became deeper & deeper and the waves became stronger & stronger. She noticed that the sand under her feet began to wash away and it was harder & harder to keep her balance. She knew this was not going to be easy, but she remembered her father’s words that she could do anything if she tried hard enough. The water was at her waist now and it was getting harder & harder to stand. She used her arms in the water to help her keep her balance, but she was getting very tired from the constant force of the water. It was now up to her neck and she had lost her footing. The sand was gone and she was being tossed about in the waves. The water pushed her out & then it pulled her in. It took her under & then it pushed her back up. She knew that she was not stronger than the waves & that she needed help. She managed to get her head above the water and look up towards the shore. It was very far away & she would never be able to get back to it on her own. She still struggled with the waves wondering where she went wrong. She thought that maybe she could swim pass the waves where the water was calm. So, she began to swim as hard as she could against the waves but she was too weak and the waves were too strong. She knew that she had to get back to the safety of the rock cliff. She tried to swim and fight her way towards the shore but the tide only took her farther and farther away. She finally whispered the words,” Help me!". She suddenly looked up and there he was. He picked her up out of the water and carried her up the cliff. He took her to the cleft in the rock cliff and set her bloody & bruised body down. She was so exhausted she didn't even realize who he was. He gave her food and water and covered her with dry blankets. He let her sleep and after she had rested and feeling better she sat up and saw him sitting by her bed. She now knew who he was. She had heard of him, many times when she was young, from her mother. She now felt very embarrassed and mostly foolish about what had happened.
"My daughter," He said,” Why did you try to fight the waves by yourself? Did you not know the strength of these waves can be very great?"
Feeling very foolish she replied “I thought that if I tried hard enough, that I could become stronger than the waves, but the sand washed out from under my feet and I lost my footing. Then I thought I could withstand their force and swim through the waves to the calm water on the other side. But, I was too weak."
"Come here, let me show you." He took her to the edge of the cliff. She stood behind Him as the waves began to hit the rocks on the edge. She could feel the water even from behind Him, but this time she was not knocked down. She felt this time that she was protected and safe. The water hit him with such a great force but he did not even blink or move. The waves continued to roll in and she could still stand because she was behind the Rock.
"I see now," she said to him, "I am strong, but only when I admit that I am too weak on my own. It's the strength of the rock that keeps me safe from the waves."
If you stand in front of the rock and go back to the sand your strength will not last and the waves will over take you again. Take refuge my child, for I am your rock, your fortress and your deliverer. Only I can save you from the waves."
"I love you, O, Lord my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters. He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me. As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in Him."
Psalms 18:1,2,16,19, &30
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• Nov. 12, 2005
His Helper
Genesis 2:18, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
Have you ever asked God for a meek & quiet spirit? I have and God showed me Genesis 2:18 through a book I was reading at the time. I would love to think of myself as meek and quiet, but I’m not even close most of the time. My meek and quiet spirit will jump right out the window as soon as my husband comes home and does things like....well, nothing! You know what I’m talking about; they come in and get in their chair instead of rolling up their sleeves and helping me finish whatever housework or schoolwork that didn’t get done for that day. I looked over that verse and read it and reread it and then the light bulb went on. I got it! God didn’t create the man to help the woman; the woman was created to help the man. I grew up with a very traditional, non-feministic mother who truly believed in serving her husband out of love and respect. I never questioned that and I also love doing the same for my husband, but I still wondered why the Bible didn’t say that the husband should help do laundry or dishes (my version of Proverbs 31) I hear other women talk about their husbands doing laundry, bathing kids...neat stuff like that, and I kept wondering, “What is wrong with my husband?” I realized that this verse is saying that he wasn’t created for that purpose. It doesn’t mean he can’t do it, but I shouldn’t expect it from him. When I expect him to roll up his sleeves and it doesn’t get done, no longer can meek and quiet fit my description! My husband does help me a lot and I try to let him see my appreciation, but I have to admit that there are times when I am wishing for more help. I often wonder if he realizes how much I try to get done and fail everyday. Things happen like kids getting hurt, windows breaking, toilets overflowing and meals not getting finished on time. My husband does care about all of that! That is why he still come’s home everyday to our house of chaos. I have learned that believe it or not, our husbands cannot read our minds! If I need his help, all I have to do is say, “I need your help” and I get it. It is so great how that works.
I pray for the Lord to show me the true joy I can receive in my sticky floors, stinky kids and a really tired husband who works so very hard. Day by day He is showing me that joy. How great is His faithfulness!!
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• Nov. 4, 2005
Many Seeds
John 12:24
Unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.
This verse has been a great blessing and help to me so many times. There have been days when I was totally overwhelmed by my kids. In fact, I did not think they were blessings at the time, more like burdens. My oldest son is a challenge to say the least. I have stayed awake at night praying for God to give me some relief from my son. He has been a challenge since he learned to crawl! At 2 years old I caught him on top of my refrigerator. He has so much energy that I can not keep up with him or the trouble he causes. At the end of the day I am exhausted from of all the consequences I have had to hand out to him. God used this verse to show me that I am like that kernel of wheat that has fallen to the ground. I must die to the fact that I cannot teach my son anything without the strength of Christ. I believe that if my son is to grow to become the man God has planned him to be I must be obedient, get out of the way, and let God work. I am only an instrument in my sons’ life. My job as his mother is to seek the Lord's guidance and be obedient in what He tells me to do. This is so hard because as a parent you want to control all that happens in our children's life. And to an extent we are supposed to, but we cannot control what decisions they will make. We have to leave that up to the Lord. We must die to self as parents so that the Lord can use us to produce many seeds of fruit in our children. Easier said than done, I know because I am still struggling with it. I like to be in control & then I hear God say, “Hello? Who is God here?” God is so much more creative than I am. When I let him be God and listen to him when I am crying out in desperation he without fail gives me ways to deal with my children that I never would have thought of by myself. And the best part is that it works!
One particular day I was extremely upset with my son. I wanted to strangle him I was so mad.(of course I wouldn’t do that J) I prayed and asked God what to do with him before I went to talk to him. The Lord told me to hug him. I said, “What? You want me to hug him? I don’t even want to look at him right now much less hug him!” But I did it anyway. My son didn’t want me to hug him but I kept my arm around him and told him that God told me to hug him. At that moment he stopped struggling and hugged me back. He told me he was sorry and he corrected his behavior. I never would have thought a hug could have been that powerful but God knew what my son needed. If I would have disciplined him on my own I would have missed a great moment with him & probably just made him even angrier. My son and I hug everyday now and I see in him fruit that I know I didn’t plant, but that the Lord is helping me to nurture.
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• Nov. 4, 2005
Creating a Schedule You Can Live With
If you were to write down what a typical day in your house was like, what would it sound like? Would it sound like a scene from I Love Lucy, full of chaos that can still be laughed at? What about a soap opera, where everyone's life is falling apart and it is always someone else's fault? What does a day in the life of you look like?
By now, most of us have begun our new school year. Our homes are buzzing with the sound of math drills, pencil sharpeners and reading lessons. For us moms we have spent countless hours planning and preparing for this time. So, how is it going? I know that for me, I have already had to rethink some of what I had planned and my schedule was the first on the list. It was only a few years ago that I decided to put a schedule of our day down on paper. It has really helped me to be a better steward of my time. Here are some tips to help you either create your first schedule or tweak the one you already have if needed.
First thing that is important to do is decide how you will use the 180 days or 36 weeks that is the basic requirement for attendance. You have lots of options such as, will you school year round or take a summer break. Speaking of breaks, when will you take them? If you are going year round then you have room to take more. Some families like to school 3 weeks on and 1 week off with no summer break. Our family does take summer off so we like to go 6 or 7 weeks on and 1 week off. Are you working 5 days a week or just 4 days? And don't forget about holidays, vacations, field trips & other important events that you already know of. This year our school is on the "new baby schedule". This means that we started school in July, we are working 5 days a week & limiting our outside activities so that we can get as much accomplished before baby arrives as possible. Once the baby comes we like to take a break & since our baby is due in November that means that our break will be with the holidays but will be longer than usual so we have a lot to get done.
Next is your monthly schedule. It is helpful to write down meetings that occur on a monthly basis such as, business meetings, homeschool, church, 4H, etc...And don't forget about birthdays!! Also, some find it very helpful to incude their monthly cleaning schedule if you have one. For example; every 1st Monday we clean base boards, 2nd Monday, outside windows, 3rd Monday's, light fixtures, etc...
Your weekly schedule is next. Routine's are important and your weekly schedule is a great place to get those established. Some have found it helpful to set aside one day or half a day a week for errands, and catch up on house work. If you know ahead of time what activities are on your schedule then you will better decide what new activities you will have time for. Write everything down that you want to accomplish during the week and see if it is even possible. We can't do everything so don't forget to schedule your children's chores. My kids have weekly chores & daily chores. It doesn't take long for the weekly chores to become habit. Ours is something like this. Monday- bedrooms, Tuesday-bathrooms, Wednesday-closets, Thursday -boys laundry, Friday - girls laundry. This had really helped the flow of things when the kids know what to expect.
Last is your daily schedule. This one takes me the longest to get right. I begin with the very start of my day & I write down everything that needs to get done & everything that I want to get done. Also write down everything that your kids need to do. I always start with myself first then work my way down through the kids starting with the oldest. I found some things do not need to be on the daily schedule so I move then to either the weekly or the monthly schedules. So, what kind of things do you include in your schedule? I put EVERYTHING, or else I will forget until it becomes habit. I schedule one on one time with kids, time for myself, reading lessons, time for myself, dinner preparation, time for myself...o'k so maybe I don't take so much time out for myself. But it is important so don't forget it. If you have older kids and younger ones then put in your schedule time for the older one to play with the younger one. They will enjoy it more than you think. Take your time doing your schedule. It takes weeks to find the one that will work well for your family. If the first one doesn't work, that is O.K. Keep tweaking until you find what does work. An excellent resource for this is Managers of Their Home by Teri Maxwell. In it you can read the schedules of other families & how they manage to fit so much into one day. I really enjoyed reading it though I didn't implement all of it. It has become one of my favorite tools to use.
Once you have a general idea of how your schedule should flow you will need to put it down on something. www.donnayoung.org is a great place to find printable blank schedules in 30 time increments. Or you can just make your own if you have EXCEL. I don't have EXCEL so I have made simple tables from the programs that are on my computer. I put the names of our family across the top in individual columns and then the time increments down the side as rows. You can make this as simple or as complex as you want.
If you want additional ideas on creating a schedule there are many very well organized moms in Frisco H.I.S that can help or you can use the web. Here are a few resources that may be helpful.
What Every Child Should Know Along the Way , by Gail Martin
The Homeschool Organizer, by Gregg Harris
The Garden Patch of Homeschooling, by Deborah McGregor
Record Keeping for the Relaxed Homeschooler, by Mary Hood
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• Nov. 4, 2005
Layers of Wallpaper
Philippians 1:6 says
“…being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
I decided one summer I would redo the boys’ bathroom. The wallpaper was coming off in places so I decided that I would strip the paper off & paint it. My summer was almost over when I finally decided it was time to strip and paint. I got my kids involved and we had a blast making a huge mess. As I was peeling off the layers I thought," this is me". I, like the wall, look really good in certain areas, but there are those places that I hope others don't see.
I hate when people would come over, because the boys’ bathroom was also the guest bathroom and it looked horrible. The paper had come loose in a few places so my little ones took that as an invitation & peeled away. In other areas it was peeling off with no-ones help. It was embarrassing to me for anyone to see it. I don't like for people to see what I am like inside sometimes. I’m prideful, arrogant, selfish, and jealous and many more I'm sure. I want people to see my wallpaper not the real me. We kept peeling the paper and one of my sons said, “Look mom there’s an ugly wall in there! Are we going to paint this?"
As I finished taking all of the paper off the wall this verse came to my mind. "I'm like these walls aren’t I Lord," I prayed. "I have so many layers of filth that you are trying to peel away. You have begun such an amazing work in my life but my "wallpaper" keeps getting in the way of the beautiful picture of me that you are painting." If we truly desire to become the masterpiece that God has intended for us then we welcome the layers of wallpaper to come off, as painful as it may be. My son was right about the wall underneath the paper. It was plain & kind of ugly, so are we without our "wallpaper" until the Lord begins painting His masterpiece do we really begin to look beautiful. I'm not done with that bathroom yet, but I hope that it will look better after I get done, than it did before I started. I’ll finish the bathroom, but the Lord will never be finished with me while I am still on this earth. I pray that while I am living that my life will reflect Christ and people will see the beautiful masterpiece that He is creating in me, but I also look forward to the day when He has completed His work in me. What a glorious day when I can stand before him with no layers of wallpaper, only as His masterpiece.
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• Nov. 4, 2005
Homeschooling with a Toddler, Is it Possible?
If you were at the first Frisco HIS meeting then you may have heard me share with everyone about our first day of school. It wasn’t the greatest day I had ever had by any means. I was so frustrated with my kids that I could scream. Wait a minute… I did scream! Anyway, my problem was that I had some expectations of what I thought our first day back to school would be like & some of my children did not live up to those expectations. Have you been there?
One of those children who didn’t cooperate was my youngest of five boys, Zachary. He is 3 ½ years old and thinks he is 10. Do you have one of those? My problem with him was that I had spent so much time planning & scheduling for the older kids that I had forgotten about his activities. I had stuff that I had bought, but forgot about it. So we had Zachary going through everyone’s stuff and causing chaos. When I finally realized the problem, I got out his clay and before I knew it I had 6 kids at the table playing with clay…quietly.
We have homeschooled 10 years and I have had at least one toddler or preschooler every year. So I have collected a few ideas that I want to share with you.
What do you have at home? I like to take inventory at home before I start shopping. Here are some things that my little guys can do with homemade items.
Ø Cut up magazine’s, construction paper or old wrapping paper.
Ø Glue what they cut to card stock or more paper. Use glue sticks.
Ø Rice or beans in a bowl. Fill up cups of different sizes & pour back into tub.
Ø Homemade playdough
o Recipe
2 tsp. Cream of Tartar
1 c. flour
½ c. salt
1 tbsp. Oil
1 c. water
Color the dough with Kool-Aid
Cook together for a few minutes until it balls up. Knead. Store in an airtight container.
Ø Draw or scribble on small white board. (watch that markers don’t end up on furniture or walls J)
Ø Play in kitchen sink with water & tear free bubbles or just measuring cups. Lay towels on floor first to reduce mess.
Ø Board books. I like these for my really young ones that still handle books rough.
Ø Duplo blocks ®
Ø Dress up clothes
Plan ahead. I can’t expect Zachary to come up with his own activities on his own. Well, he will but they are usually pretty destructive. J I have found some things on the web. Below are a few website that I have found helpful. It is also helpful to yourself if you know ahead of time what activities you have ready. Place them in a special place. Tubs or baskets are handy. Make a list if that helps so that you can refer to it quickly.
Pre-K websites
http://www.letteroftheweek.com
This is a site where you can find lesson plans for your babies up to 4 yrs. It is free. You just print out what you want, follow her suggestions for books to read & songs to sing & you have a Pre-K curriculum.
http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Forest/2468/
This had a lot of ideas of what to do with 2 yr olds. Some can be pretty messy though, which is what 2 yr olds love anyway!
http://www.preschooleducation.com/
This is loaded with free stuff to print off.
These are Bible activities for all ages, but have activities for preschoolers also.
Be prepared by keeping safe supplies ready.
Ø Safety scissors
Ø Non-toxic crayons
Ø Paper (card stock, construction and copy paper)
Ø Glue sticks (my kids like the kind that goes on purple, but dries clear)
And anything else you can think of.
Schedule time for your younger ones before you start school. They are still very needy and need your attention. Try reading or playing for 30 minutes or so with your toddler or preschooler before you start lessons with your older kids. If you fill their love tank then they are less likely to disturb you. When you do find them disturbing others pull them into you lap. Sometimes that is all they need. Be sensitive to their needs. It is really easy to get so wrapped up in your older one’s lessons that we forget about the younger ones. They get loud and disruptive & we get frustrated. Take a minute and try to understand why they are being so disruptive. Usually it is time for a break anyway so take one & spend it with your toddler.
I shared about my really bad first day of school. Well, there is a happy ending. The rest of our week was wonderful. I made sure Zachary had something to do and that my other kids kept busy also. Idle time makes for trouble! Also, I lessened my expectations & took another look at our schedule to see what needed fixing. I’m really looking forward to Monday!
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• Nov. 4, 2005
God Time
© Copyright 2005, Dana Bailey, All Rights Reserved
One day during our Bible Study time, the kids & I were discussing Psalm 139:7-10.
“Where can I go from your spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.”
We discussed that it doesn’t matter where we are God is always there. One of my sons said, “Yeah, like He’s right here.”, as he patted the sofa seat beside him. Then he looked down and noticed that the sofa was covered with books, pencils and paper so he began moving it aside so that there would be room for God to sit. We all had a good laugh out of that, but I thought later, “Have I made room for Christ in my life, what needs to be moved over or out so that he can sit with me?” We get so busy with our little ones and the daily routines of life that we gradually squeeze God out. Before we know it there just isn’t time for a quiet time or prayer. The good news is God is everywhere we are. We can call on Him any time, any where. That is a great comfort to me to know that I can call on Him anytime of day and anywhere I am when I do find myself drowning in my day. But, I know that He is blessed when I go to Him first in my day. He wants to speak His blessings & wisdom to us before any attacks are thrown at us.
As you plan out the new school year, don’t forget to make room for God in you schedule & plans. Give yourself a specific God time in your day. Your family will love you for it! Your family will be blessed by it.
In addition to reading the Word I also enjoy these books during my God time;
My Utmost for His Highest, Oswald Chambers
More Hours in My Day, Emilie Barnes
Praying the Bible for Your Children, David & Heather Kopp
One Hundred and One Devotions for Homeschool Moms, Jackie Wellwood
Power of a Praying Parent
Power of a Praying Wife, Stormie Omartian
© Copyright, Dana Bailey, All Rights Reserved
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• Nov. 4, 2005
Desperate to be Organized
ORGANIZATION. I feel a bit desperate in this area at times…O’K most of the time. Organization is not one of my gifts. God has quite the sense of humor in making someone like me the mother of nine! My mother did most of the cleaning when I was growing up. She admits to cleaning my room rather than putting up with the hassle of making me clean it. Don’t expect any great secrets to reorganizing your home from me. I just wanted to share what my struggle with organization has taught me.
I think that organization is a lot like faith. It isn’t something you are born with, it is something you learn & I didn’t learn how to organize until I realized how unorganized I was. When I started having kids I knew that something would have to change. I had to learn some organization skills or else one of these days I would lose one of my kids amid the clutter & chaos. I then became an Emilie Barnes “junky”. I bought every book she wrote on organization. I bought all kinds of books on the subject, but who had time to read when there is so much to be done not to mention a bunch of kids to keep up with. So, the books got put up on the shelf until a few years ago. I was desperate to get organized! I read the Emilie Barnes books & then I bought some more books. I read & read but I was still so unorganized. I even made a notebook like Flylady said to. I was still unorganized. I went to every homeschool meeting when organization was the topic. I came home & bought file folders, I labeled drawers and did all the other things that help to keep the guest speaker organized, but it didn’t work for me. A few times I would walk into a room armed with my 3 boxes (ya know, keep, throw away & give away) determined to get it under control and set the boxes down, walk out & shut the door. The job was too big. Then I would remember the words of Emilie Barnes, “It only takes 15 minutes.” So I would set the timer & start sorting but got distracted & then my time was up. Oh well, there is always tomorrow. It helped a little but after time it would all fall apart & things would be a mess again. I was so frustrated.
I first had to realize that I could read every book ever written on organization, but unless I applied any of it I couldn’t expect to get organized. That may seem like a “well, duh” thing to say but how many of you (yes, I know you are out there) complain about how unorganized you are, but you could tell someone else how to get organized because you’ve read all the books on it. I know what I need to do to get the job done. But it’s a lot of hard work & I am a very busy person working very hard on a lot of other things (like an article on organization). It takes time & I don’t have a lot of time. But change takes time and I had to learn how to make time for it. In Vicky Caruana’s book The Organized Home Schooler, she says, “This is similar to making the choice to follow Christ. It takes time to get to know Him. It requires changing how we spend our time. Time spent for ourselves and our own purposes must be changed to time spent in His Word and for His Kingdom. God challenges us with His ways and His Word. It’s more a matter of a willing spirit than it is a matter of time.”
After I realized that those books didn’t do me any good until I had a willing spirit to change I then realized how many bad habits I had. Instead of putting the paper in the right file that I had labeled and into the right drawer that I had also labeled I just put the paper on the counter that we knick named “junk counter”. All I was left with was a lot of empty drawers & a very full counter. Changing these bad habits into good habits has become a never ending journey. I never really thought that I needed God’s help with this. But after time I found myself looking for scriptures to help encourage me not to give up. I got the kids involved & we as a family began encouraging each other to break those bad habits. And slowly but surely the chaos, disorder & stress that was brought on by the disorganization became less. It’s still not totally gone. I don’t think it ever will be. As long as I have kids at home there will probably always be a level of disorganization, but it won’t destroy our peace. The opposite of peace is stress & peace is mentioned in the Bible at least 230 times! God wants us to live in peace & orderliness. “For God is not a God of disorder, but of peace.” (1 Cor.14:33)
There are so many great resources out there to help, but like I found out they only work if your heart is ready to change. So, if you print out this newsletter to read later don’t just set it down. Put it in the right place, file drawer, folder, notebook, etc…and you are on your way!
Resources
The Organized Home Schooler by Vicki Caruana
Confessions of an Organized Homemaker by Deniece Schofield
12 Steps to Becoming a More Organized Woman by Lane P. Jordan
15 minute Organizer and other books by Emilie Barnes
Speed Cleaning by Jeff Campbell
Hidden Art of Homemaking by Edith Schaeffer
Side-tracked Home Executives by Pam Young and Peggy Jones
Clutter’s Last Stand and Is There Life After Housework? By Don Aslett
401 Ways to Get Your Kids to Work at Home by Bonnie Runyan McCullough
Choreganizers: The
Websites
FLY Lady
http://www.flylady.net
Managers of Their Homes
www.titus2.com
Other organizing sites
www.organizedhome.com
www.organizetips.com
www.creativehomemaking.com
www.onlineorganizing.com
www.organized-mom.com
www.organizethislife.com
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• Nov. 4, 2005
Looking at the Right Side of the Picture
© 2005 Copyright, Dana Bailey, All Rights Reserved
Have you ever woke up to start a new day, but you really weren’t ready to start it? Have you ever thought, “I don’t want to be Mom today.”? I can get so tired of the constant in my life. The constant laundry, constant dishes, constant dirty diapers, constant sticky floors and I could go on, but I think you understand. I can become so consumed with what needs to be done during the day that I miss out on the blessings that God has for me. That’s when I start crying and saying things like, “I don’t want to do this today! I’m tired of dirty kids and dirty floors and dirty diapers!” I can only remember one time when I passed by the laundry room & there wasn’t a pile of laundry waiting to be washed. It was our last walk through of our house before we moved in! I have been changing diapers since 1991…and potty training someone since 1994. And I am still changing diapers & potty training with no end in site yet.
There is good news. I don’t want to discourage or depress you. I want to encourage you that it does get better. During one of my pity parties one day the Lord showed up. I was talking to myself & he joined in on the conversation. “You are looking at the wrong picture.” He said. “Look over here.” And it was as if He took my face in His hands and turned my face to look at a different picture. It was beautiful. There were my children looking well behaved and clean. I was there too and I looked good (I must say). My husband is there playing with the kids & life looks good. “Wow! Where did you find them?” I asked. “They have always been there, but you choose to focus on that other picture.” The other picture was full of chaos. The kids are yelling the house is a mess; I am exhausted and where is my husband?
I miss out on the blessings that God has for me when I focus on the wrong picture. When I focus on how tired I am, how long it has been since I went to the bathroom alone or that my husband is late from work again; I am feeling burned out on life. God has given me 9 of the most wonderful kids ever. My husband is still crazy in love with me as I am with him. So why am I complaining? Because of my sin nature, it is easier to live in my weakness and cry than to live in my strengths and be blessed. My family is my gift from God. It is a gift I don’t deserve, but it is given to me by God because of his love for me & His amazing plan for my life & the life of my kids. There is another reason why I do this. The enemy loves it when I focus on myself rather than the Lord. Nothing pleases him more than for me to take my eyes off of the Lord. It is then that I become weak let my guard down & the next thing I know is I’m hosting another pity party.
O.k. so how do I stay focused on the right picture? His Word is the best way for me to stay focused. Psalms 16:8 says, “I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.” God put our eyes in the front of our head. We sometimes wish we could see behind us but we can’t. It would definitely make my days easier. We can only see what is in front of us. You can’t focus on God if He is not in front of you leading the way. Meditating and reading his word on a regular basis will keep you strong and better able to recognize temptation and resist it. It is a temptation of the enemy for us to focus on ourselves rather than the Lord. In Stormie Omartians’ book, The Power of a Praying Wife she said this; “God wants us to get through temptation because He wants to bless us. But He needs to see if we can be trusted to choose His ways over our fleshly desires. He’ll always give us a way out if we want it badly enough to seek Him for it.” One of my ways to battle temptation is to keep scripture up in front of me all day. That way His Word is on my mind and on my wall!
Another way to remain focused or get focused is to stay in conversation with the Lord. As a mom of 9 I rarely get the amount of time in prayer that I really want. I have had to learn how to stay in an ongoing conversation with God all day. I am so thankful that we can come to Him anywhere and anytime. I have also learned that I can worship God in all that I do. That keeps my attitude right. If I’m worshipping God while I am mopping the floor then I am not complaining about having to mop the floor. Prayer can be worship for us. It can happen in the midst of chaos. I don’t know how it happens, but I have on occasion been able to zone out my kids & just be quiet & let the Lord bless my spirit while right in the middle of chaos. It is great!
When I am looking for the bad in my children I will find it every time. The funny thing is that when I am looking for the good I find that too. In spite of what we would like to believe at times God made our children excellent. They are made in His likeness just like we are. They are not perfect, they do smell at times. And they are great at breaking things, spilling things, throwing things and blowing up things. But my kids are also very good at hugging, kissing, helping, playing, praying and just being an out right hoot to be around. We have a lot of fun in our house. My kids have a great sense of humor and a lot of laughing goes on everyday. But often we are only paying attention to the things that bother us instead of trying to catch each other in a good deed. With that kind of mindset I am looking at the wrong picture and missing out on a lot of blessings. When I pray and ask God to help me see my children as excellent as he sees them, I love them even deeper and desire to have them around me.
It is so important to keep God first in your life as you are teaching and training your children. Only God knows what that final picture of their life will look like & we have to trust Him and look to Him for wisdom and guidance. Psalms 127:1 reminds us that; “Unless the Lord builds the house its builders labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city the watchmen stand guard in vain.” I mess it up all the time & try to “build” my way or by myself. How great our God is to be there waiting for me to come back to Him seeking forgiveness. He will be there every time as long as we desire to be right with him. The Lord knows how hard our days can be as a mother. He understands our frustrations and exhaustion. Erma Bombeck once said that “Motherhood isn’t for sissy’s.”, and I believe it! We put up with a lot everyday. But God puts up with more so don’t be surprised if He crashes one of your pity parties like he did mine.
Keep your eyes focused on the right picture that God has set before you. Talk to him daily, listen to him daily and read His Word daily and then sit back & rest in knowing that your children are in His hands. You can make it, his Word says so. Psalms 18:30 says, “What a God! His road stretches straight and smooth. Every God-direction is road tested. Everyone who runs toward Him makes it!”(The Message) As a mom that is a very comforting thought to know that if I seek Him then I will make it. I will not only survive these days while my children are young but I will be blessed by them also.
© 2005 Copyright, Dana Bailey, All Rights Reserved
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• Nov. 4, 2005
My Garden
For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:11-13
I’ve made an attempt at a garden for the past three years. I stress the word "attempt" because I haven't been very successful at it. The first year we planted corn, beans, okra, cantaloupe & maybe a few others. Out of that planting we got a few beans and lots of okra. The corn suffered an untimely death by the hands of my son who mistook them for weeds. Everything else was eaten by the grasshoppers. The next two years we tried to plant a little more, but again we failed. I look out at my garden from my kitchen and wonder, "Why won't this garden do what I want it to. I plant the seeds, I hoe the weeds, I water, I do everything I know to do but still it is a flop.”
Have you ever looked at your children like this? You do everything you think that you know to do & they just won’t cooperate. I love my kids and I love spending time with them, but some days....I tell them over and over and over and it seems as if they will never obey. I’ve even had days when I look at a particular child and wonder if God really meant for me to raise this child or was he supposed to go to another family that would better know what to do with him. But since God makes no mistakes then I know I am supposed to be this child’s mother. On good days that start out with the Lord, He always reminds me that if I will seek him and follow him then he will take care of the rest. If I will just love and nurture the seeds that he has given me they will bloom into beautiful plants. His timing is perfect and so is his will and plan for us. We live in a very hurried society today, we have a really hard time waiting on anything especially God, yet we still say, “God knows best." We take our requests to Him but if he doesn't answer or change that child in our timing we get anxious.
Our garden (family) will prosper when we call on Him. We will bear much fruit through Him when we seek Him with all our heart. I think I am getting out of the actual garden business, it's not my thing. But the spiritual garden that the Lord is planting for me is sprouting. I still have weeds in it that He is helping me with, but with his help I know it will be a bumper crop one of these days.
