MY THOUGHTS on Stormie OMartian's "The Power of a Praying Wife"
Chapter 9: HIS PURPOSE
Our husband's purpose... well, this chapter is HUGE in the scheme of things, isn't it? I mean, with everything we've discussed so far having great impact on our husband's life... if he struggles with WHY he's here... well, there's just so many other things and areas that crumble. Regardless of whether your husband believes it or not, God created him for a purpose. He created EVERYONE for a purpose.
When you're around a man who is fulfilling his calling and doing what he was created to do, you're aware of his inner direction, confidence, and deep security. -Stormie OMartian (p.94)
Do you know of men who are like what Stormie described? Is your husband a man like that? Now, let me ask you the next question... if you're husband isn't a man like that... are you part of the reason why your husband is struggling with his purpose?
My husband had a job awhile ago, that even though I knew God wanted him to do... I was less than happy about it. We'd worked together since I met him, and now he was going into something new... and without me. I would be at home full time and would see him very little in the summers. Like I said, I KNEW that he was doing what God wanted him to do, but I was selfish. I did things like call him at 5pm and ask when he was going to be home (because that's when he came home before this job). I showed my disappointment when he would tell me he had to work on the weekend. I expressed my displeasure for me having to be at home all the time. I got real "ugly"... and I can only imagine how he must of cringed to come into our home on those days he knew I'd had a bad day. Instead of REALLY supporting him and feeling bad for HIM when he had to work late because he really wanted to be at home with his family, I put him on the "defensive" just by my actions and words.
When I realized what I'd been doing, I felt so horrible... and when I apologized to him, it was like a wall came down... and we were a team once again... but I had to make the decision to change because I had been wrong. I may have TOLD Mike that I supported him... but my actions were showing him differently.
Whatever God has called your husband to be or do, He has also called you to support it and be a part of it, if in no other way that to pray, encourage, and help in whatever way possible. -Stormie OMartian (p. 95)
I have to admit that jealousy came into the whole thing as well... I was jealous that he was out and I was "stuck at home"... I remember asking God sooooooooooooo many times what MY PURPOSE was... and even though I knew I was to be a wife and mom, I wanted more.
God does not ask you to deny your own personhood in the process. God has called you to something , too. But it will fit in with whatever your husband's calling is, it will not be in conflict with it. God is not he author of confusion, strife, or unworkable situations. He is a God of perfect timing. -Stormie OMartian (p.95)
Eventually we talked about it, I apologized for being so bitter and angry... and we became a "team" again... which wound up being great timing because there were tougher roads ahead and we NEEDED to be strong... our marriage needed to be strong for what was ahead (but that's another post).
A wife can't put pressure on her husband to be something, but she can pray for him to become it. She can pray that he be molded according to God's plan and not anyone else's. -Stormie OMartian (p.93)
It was hard when God first told Mike that he needed to go to college for ministry. He didn't even know what he would wind up doing (and church planting certainly wasn't on the radar even!). But he followed. I also didn't know exactly what would happen, but I knew that he would speak to many and influence those he came into contact with. My husband laughed at the thought since he was terrified to speak in front of crowds (now, for those of you who know my very talkative and extroverted husband, this may come as a surprise... but I'm serious... he could handle small groups... but put him on a stage, and he turned white as a sheet).
I remember when he came to me one day and said, "there's no way that I can do this... He's gotta have somebody better than me to do this job..." There were people who doubted him... in fact, some even told him that he COULD NEVER be a pastor. But see... I serve a God who is bigger than that... and so I told him, "God chose you BECAUSE of who you are... and He will be glorified because of your past... You will share your story because God has saved you from bondage and now you must go back in to free the others... and I will be with you every step of the way." I could have changed that whole story with a change in my attitude... I could have agreed with him and doubted that he could ever do such an "absurd" thing... but when God calls you to do something... he will also enable you to do it. I believed that God would work through Mike... and I believed in my husband... and it changed everything when Mike saw that.
When he discovers [his] purpose, and is doing what he was created to do, becoming what he was created to be, he will find fulfillment. -Stormie OMartain (p.93)
Your husband has a purpose... and what you say and do is so crucial in how he fulfills that purpose... or if he ever does. This is not about us ladies... it's not even about our husbands... it's about God and the very reason he created your husband and made you his wife. As much as you are a "team" with your husband... you are a "team" with God too, making sure that through the difficult and trying times that your encouragement, love and support continue to move your husband forward into what God created him for...
MY PRAYER:
Dear Heavenly Father, Please give me the strength and wisdom to support my husband in his call on his life. I know You have created each of us for a reason, and I pray for those reasons to be fulfilled. Help us to "stay on track" and enable us to go forward into the future knowing we are on the right path and exactly where you want us. Lord, help me to support, encourage and love my husband so he will never doubt his purpose. May he always look into my eyes and see nothing but adoration for him, so it will carry him through the trying times of his calling. You have not said it will be easy... but I am so grateful for walking through everything with my husband, and I pray that he will always feel that way as well. Don't let me be discouragement in any way Lord, and make his way clear to him always so he will find complete and total fulfillment knowing he is completely the very purpose he was created for. In Jesus' name, Amen.
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It's not too late to join us for the month of June as we pray for our husbands! You can check out more about it by clicking the following link: S.H.M.I.L.Y. for 30 days of prayer... Please share a link to your blog post if you've made one on this chapter!
Posted by Anonymous 
Tuesday, June 9, 2009 - Untitled Comment
I have another copy of Praying Wife coming through Swaptree if anyone needs one they can have it. As soon as it comes in the mail I can get it to you.