I am a very serious, contemplative, person and that often comes across on the blog. But I'm not serious all the time. I can often be very silly and am sometimes even funny. I mean, I make people laugh all the time; although they're often laughing at me, but that's because I've learned that the best jokes are the ones where I am the brunt. Anyway, in an effort to bring a measure of levity to my blog, I thought I'd share my thoughts on a topic that has recently affected me very personally with serious repurcusions! I'm talking about HAIR people; It doesn't get much more serious than this! But wait, I'm trying to avoid being serious, stick with me people, I'm trying.
It all started on Father's Day. I was long overdue for a haircut and wanted to get one before we went out of town for a wedding, and my husband was out of town, so while at my sister's house, with a lot of the family gathered, I asked my sister if she would be willing to come over and watch the kids on her day off while I went to get a haircut. She seemed willing, but questioned why I didn't just let Mom cut it for me, after all Mom has always cut her hair for her and always does a decent job. Akward silence. How exactly does one respond in such a situation with Mom sitting right there, willing to cut your hair, yet obviously nervous about it? Hmmm!
Living halfway across the country, I had gotten out of the habit of having Mom cut my hair. While I only managed to get to the hairdressers about twice a year, it was still an indulgence that I enjoyed. Hair is such a sensitive topic and can cause much distress. Being an emotional teenager, many a hair cut ended or began with tears. Was I willing to go there again with my Mom? But how does one graciously refuse such an offer without coming across as holier-than-thou. "Oh, dear sister, it's fine for you to allow Mom to cut your hair, but I've grown accustomed to paying people large sums of money for the privilege of cutting my hair, and you don't mind, of course, babysitting my kids while I do so, do you?" No, it wasn't going to fly, so my mom cut my hair. (We weren't talking simple trim here, we're talking going back to bangs after not having bangs for the past 4 years.) Right there, that night, the deed was done and unsuprisingly, I hated it. And of course I couldn't admit that I hated it, even when my sister asked, "Do you hate it?" Sigh!
Now a few months have passed, and it's time for a trim, or something; once again I find myself in the akward position of what to do now. As I considered going back to my mom again, I came up with this list of 10 Reasons Why Grown Women Should Not Have Their Mothers Cut Their Hair. I guess I'll be asking my husband to watch the kids for me this time. Let me know if you agree or not.
# 10. You totally miss out on the best part of the salon experience when Mom uncerimoniously instructs you to go wet your hair in the bathroom sink. So much for the relaxing scalp massage!
# 9. Mom doesn't blowdry and style at then end, so you walk out looking like a wet dog having no idea how the haircut really turned out until you get home and style it yourself. (Although the latter is not necessarily a bad thing.)
# 8. Watching your children chase eachother around the house while you're glued to a chair in the Kitchen does not aid in recreating the relaxing haircut experience you get at the salon. (Nor is it conducive to keeping your head still while Mom is cutting.)
# 7. Mom thinks you looked your best in 1989 when you looked like Farrah Fawcett with hair "like a lion's mane." (I am not making this up, she actually said this to me one day!)
# 6. It doesn't matter how many magazines you flip through searching for the perfect hairstyle because she always cuts it the same way regardless. (And knowing that you want thick bangs like Rory on the Gilmore Girls does not mean you'll actually look like Rory when she's done.)
# 5. Mom has always cut her own hair herself and after she's done with you, your father will have a hard time not staring at you as you look just like she did 20 years ago.
# 4. Remember how she cut your hair in high school by pulling all your hair into a pony tail on the top of your head and cutting it straight across? It's called a shag and she was pleased with the results! (So were you, but you also thought you looked cute in peg legged, pleated, blue jeans).
# 3. You can't subtly express your displeasure by giving her a small tip. (Somehow, "Here's a tip, Mom: NEVER TOUCH MY HAIR AGAIN!" does nothing to improve your mother-daughter relationship.)
# 2. The moment you sit down on the kitchen stool, you're instantly transported back in time to your childhood with all its angst and all your former insecurities where you fervently pray that your mom won't totally screw up your hair and make you look like a freak.
And the Number One reason why grown woman should not allow their mothers to cut their hair:
(insert drumroll, please)
When she's done and you hate it, you can't go home and call your mom to cry about how the hairdresser butchered your hair.
(insert sheepish grin, jazzy music)
P.S. In the off chance that you actually decide to read my blog, I love you, Mom! And I appreciate you! Oh, and you must not have done too bad of a job since a girl at church just got her hair cut, with bangs, saying, "well since you got bangs, I thought I should too." Aren't you happy to know I'm still a trend setter? (That doesn't mean I'm letting you cut my hair again!) Chris is worried that I'm going to hurt your feelings, but I hope you know this is just a vain attempt at humor in the likeness of our favorite, David Letterman. :) Do you think Dave's Mom still cuts his hair. :)
Oh, and since I know you'll all be clammoring for pictures, here's one I took this evening.
(What? You didn't think I'd actually allow anyone to take a bad hair picture of moi, did you? Nope, not even for the blog!)
This son of mine is in desperate need of a haircut! Doesn't his hair remind you of the Eighties Brat Pack or Duran Duran? Imagine what we could do with a little bit of gel! Unfortunately the task for cutting his hair falls to Yours Truly. Yep, I'm sure he'll have stories of his own to tell about Mom cutting his hair. Maybe I should just let Gramma do it. :) | 
