Aug. 17, 2007 - He knows my name...
Isn't it reassuring that God knows us all by name? That He knows the number of our days? That He knows the number of hairs on our head? God knows everything about us and He knows the plan that was designed specifically for each one of us.
So why is it then, when something tragic happens we can't make sense of it? We can't understand why it had to happen?
This week has been one of those weeks. I am writing this from Charleston, SC where we have come for a funeral. My husband's old business partner just lost his wife suddenly. She was still so young...only about 42. She left behind not only her husband, but their 2 young children. It's just breaks my heart when these things happen.
Then just yesterday another friend of ours lost her brother in law. He was driving home from work, had a heart attack and died.
One of my biggest fears used to be dying young and leaving my children without a mother. Then one day a friend of mine told me about when she was diagnosed at the age of 31 with thyroid cancer while pregnant with her 3rd. child. She spent a good bit of time away from her newborn baby after he was born due to having a lifetime dose of radiation. I am sure when this happened to her, she had the same fears that most of us struggle with. What will happen to my children? God lead her on an incredible journey of trust, faith and growth. She came to the conclusion that if God took her to her eternal home, then He knew the purpose, He was in control and He had a plan for her children. I am happy to say, she is still alive and well and a major player in the homeschool community.
There are days when I am right there with her and my fears are gone. Then there are days when that fear grips me...could there be a plan for my children that is better than them having ME? Only God knows. I hope His plan does include me raising my children, watching them as they get married and have their own children. My heart aches for those children who lose their mother so young and for the mothers that now watch their children from above. I guess we will never know (in this lifetime) what the bigger picture is...but we can praise God that He holds the plan book and He has our best interest at heart. He loves our children even more than we do...and that's hard to imagine. Let's embrace every moment with our children and praise God we have the privildge to be at home with them all the time.
Blessings,
