Mar. 13, 2007 ~ Jack Bean vs. State!
Okay, I bet you're all as thoroughly tired of hearing my injury complaints as I am of telling them. =D I haven't broken any more bones yet, it'll take roughly two weeks before another flying baseball hits me....
So, my family and some friends took a field trip to the Georgia Bar Association today. It was kinda boring place, that besides being a museum, doubled as a training place for lawyers. The fun thing we did was participate in a mock trial. The tour lady gave out lines to everyone, and we performed it as if it was a real case. Except, most cases don't involve trying Jack Bean for the murder of the ogre, criminal trespass, and robbery of the magic harp, gold and silver coins, and golden-egg-laying hen. I had to play Jack Bean. Witnesses included Mr. Pumpkineater, Friar Tuck, the Farmer's Wife, Ima Ogre (the late ogre's wife) and some others. The state prosecution held that I had murdered the ogre, trespassed on his property, and stolen his possessions. We, as the defense, held that the ogre fell to his death before I'd cut down the vine, and it would be self-defense anyway, since he was trying to kill me and grind my bones to make his bread. To the trespassing charge we said that Mrs. Ogre had invited me in all three times, and the stuff that I'd 'stolen' was really mine anyways, and I was just taking it back.
I won the case, though the opponents cheated so the jury found me guilty of trespassing. Murder and stealing were both unanimously voted not guilty, and only 4 out of 20 voted that I'd trespassed. Somehow, though four-fifths of the jurors had voted me not guilty, I was found guilty. Shows what good honest law has become. A guy can't even get his own magic harp back from an evil giant without being accused. The judge gave me a penalty of picking up used beer bottles from the side of the road for two months. I have decided to ignore the order, and take this case to the supreme court. Jack Bean is not guilty! =D
Comments
Mar. 13, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Comment Left By Sk8r-Girl
Ha! That must have rawked! :D I did something of that sort when we visited our state capitol. I'm glad U had fun! ;)
Lisa
Mar. 13, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Comment Left By learnmylingo
I will attempt to quit rofl long enough to comment you... that was great. But, then, I'm short on sleep, and bored to death, I could laugh at anything. >,<
-Erin
Mar. 13, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Comment Left By TC
Hey, I could play Mrs. Ogre! I've had lots of practice at it....
If you need a character witness when you go before the Supreme Court, let me know. :)
Mar. 13, 2007 - I'M COMMENTING. =PPP
Comment Left By SouthernBelle
Jack Bean, huh? Forget boogerbo- I mean, gooberboy, I'm calling you Jack. :D
I saw a certain pic of a certain cute someone, on a certain somebody's mother's blog... ;) Betcha can't guess who.
I have this strange vibe that you're going to get something in the mail this weekend to Tuesday at the latest...
Mar. 14, 2007 - Wowsers!
Comment Left By 1percentmilk
That sounds like a lot of fun to participate in!
Lydia
P.S. Please visit my blog to see my newest production.
Edited by 1percentmilk on Mar. 15, 2007 at 11:55 AM
Mar. 15, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Comment Left By CerealKiller
Um, interesting. =P
Mar. 16, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Comment Left By TC
What are you able to eat these days? Are you ready for me to send you some carrots? You know, the beta carotene helps eyesight - maybe it will help you see the baseball better. :)
Mar. 16, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Comment Left By BookFreak
Oh my gosh, Christian... I slack off for a few days and when i return you've killed yourself again? I finally checked your blog last night and durned if i didn't think i was dreaming. I immediately turned off my laptop and dropped into bed, hoping that you would be all well and healthy this morning. Ah well, worth a thought, i guess. Maybe... by your getting injured so many times you've saved your great-great-eversogreat grandson from being hit by a bus or something...
And THEN, after this self-sacrificing act for your great-great-grandkid, you've been found guilty of... um, something heinous, which of course you cannot truly be guilty of, because how could someone so selfless be guilty of something so... um, heinous?
Anyway, I’m logging off now, so do what TC said and wrap yourself up in bubble wrap and a suit of armor. No more dying, it's not allowed...
I like kangaroo courts like that! I was tried for having a birthday at camp and not telling anyone. I pleaded guilty on a count of youthful ignorance. I was very repentant, and was let off. Sounds like Jack Bean put up a good fight though!
~BookFreak
Mar. 16, 2007 - That sounds like fun
Comment Left By Faith1
Oh, that sounds like so much fun. I used to do speech and debate with a team where I live. There is this organization called NCFCA, it would take me a while to type what it is, but google it! The topic which NCFCA had to debate was "Is Democacy overvauled by the United States Government." Ok, I'm going to sound like a geek, but, it was so much fun to debate that topic! :-)
Well any way, I hope that you are doing better!
Mar. 17, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Comment Left By LadyJaneGrey
*Gasps and faints*
I had a traumatic experience with a mock trial when I was eight years old. I was Goldilocks, and I was on trial for breaking and entering, and petty theft. I was found guilty, and everyone was staring at me, and the three bears were so quick to judge...
^-^ Sorry. I never have fully recovered from that.
