More on what I have been dealing with as far as heart issues today. I was musing over this while I was cleaning out my refrigerator today. You know, the clean house part...

Anyway, I was thinking about all the methods I have tried in failed attempts to deal with my lack of desire to clean my house. This led down the rabbit trail of attitude. See, for me the clean heart part of the challenge has been a longer road than the last two weeks.

2-1/2 years ago I was laid off of my last corporate job. It was my second layoff in 6 months. I wasn't really upset, as we had been talking about me becoming a SAHM. I was excited that I would finally be able to live my dream and be a Mom to my girls. Unfortunately, being a SAHM wasn't what I though it would be. It's not that I thought it would be easy, it's just that I wasn't aware of the major adjustment period that would be involved for me, DH, and the girls.

For me it was about suddenly being cut off from all adult interaction. For DH it was becoming the sole breadwinner overnight. For the girls it was suddenly having lost the guilty, miserable mommy and getting the authoritarian mommy. It was a struggle. To say the least.

Anyway, adding to the stress of adjusting to one income was the fact that DH was in school. That was an expense above and beyond what we were used to. He was stressed, I was lonely, the girls were confused...

Anyway, DH had some expectations about what the house should look like at the end of the day. When I couldn't meet those expectations I fell into depression, although I would have denied it at the time. I became severely passive-aggressive. It's my nature anyway, but becoming depressed exacerbated the problem.

Anytime DH would criticize me instead of trying to defend myself or talk to him (since he wasn't in a state to listen anyway) I would do things (or not do things) to get him riled up. Things like not cleaning, not doing laundry, not doing much of anything. I mean, I would about once a week do some minor cleaning to keep the health department at bay, but it was hardly pleasing.

Anyway, it's been a long road.

So, onto the "programs." I think that I tried them all. And it seemed like most recommended that you declutter first. SO I started trying to declutter. Only working 15 minutes at a time for a week in every room was....less than impressive. The program I stayed with longest was Flylady. It was great, but after 15 months on the program I wasn't seeing the results. I was still decluttering. It was devastating. So I quit that. And I tried other programs.

Then I realized the problem. Following the program was what was keeping me from doing anything. In fifteen minutes I could tidy a drawer or cabinet in my kitchen easy. Okay. Yay me!

Then in three weeks while I was in other areas of the house the clutter would come back. It would expand from other cabinets and drawers that I hadn't gotten to. It was VERY frustrating.

Which is why the CHCHC works for me. I have been decluttering in longer lengths of time lately. We had been planning a garage asle for quite some time anyway. So, when Amy (Dandelion Seeds) posted the details of the CHCHC I thought it might work.

And I think it will. See, the problem that I had with the previous "plans" was that I never had enough time to really declutter an area enough to really make a difference. With the CHCHC I stay in the room long enough to really make a difference. I can get it decluttered and cleaned, or mostly cleaned, in the assigned time. Then if I have an extra hour or two on another day I can come back. But the key is I don't have to worry about someone chastising me for spending 2-1/2 hours cleaning (and I mean REALLY CLEANING) my refrigerator.

So, I am a happy camper. The schedule I made for the CHCHC is working. I think I can stick to it even after the challenge is over. And with a sparkly clean house, the upkeep will be easier. And Bonus! I have a copy of the organizer so I can do this heavy duty cleaning in 52 days again when I need to. Because I know that it will work!

Finally.

Oh, yeah. I never told DH about the challenge, but he has definately noticed the difference. He loves that the living room is really clean. I have at least been keeping the kitchen tidy, and that has been noticed too. He hasn't asked what was up yet/ Maybe he's afraid he'll jinx it??

LOL.