Being the oldest of six kids is no easy job. Sure, it has its paybacks, like being the one with the most freedom, but in other cases, it's just not fair. Now, don't think I'm complaining, I'm just sharing several funny cases of unfairness towards the oldest.  

Case 1:

I received my first knife at 9 years old. Not only did I have to practically BEG to get it, but then my Dad (years later) gave a knife to my brother when he was 5!

Case 2:

I am always having to convince my parents that "this video game is OK," 'cause they don't enjoy us playing all these violent games. Well, I have to do all the work, and then they can play it, while no skin was off their back from the "debate."

Case 3:

You always get served your ice-cream last (unless we do "quietest gets theirs first after laddies" :-)

OK, enough with the complaints. Now for some good cases of when it actually pays off to be the oldest. The first three are rebuttals of the above cases. 

Case 1:

You're STILL the first one to get a knife.

Case 2:

You're the first one to play it.

Case 3:

You probably are the quietest there, and only lose 'cause the judge (a bro) has bad taste :-p

Case 4:

You get to go places with friends, and like I said above, you have more freedom (and some authority).  

And now some jokes...

Mahammand Ali, a heavyweight wrestler was on an airplane. A stewardess came up to him and said:

   "Please buckle your seat belt."

   He replied: "Superman don't need no seat belt."

   The Quick-witted stewardess replied: "Superman don't need no airplane."

One there was a baby born, and his parents named him Odd. He was always getting picked on at school 'cause of it, so when he married, he told his wife not to put his name on his grave. Upon dieing, she complied with his wishes. And whenever anyone passing by saw that there was no name, they would say:

   "That's odd."

OK, one more...

A robber was in a house, robbing ('cause that's what they do). It's dark. Suddenly, out of nowhere, he hears:

   "I see you and Jesus sees you to."

   He snapped on his flashlight, and looks all around, but can't find the speaker. He hears it again:

   "I see you and Jesus sees you to."

   He shines the flashlight in the direction of the voice, and spies a parrot. The parrot says it one more time:

   "I see you and Jesus sees you to."

   The robber draws an gun (maybe his concise it pricking him :-), and prepares to kill the bird, when his flashlight falls on a rottweiler sitting under the cage. The parrot says:

   "Sick 'em Jesus." 

Joke credits: My Mom, bro, and radio.