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In Memorial - Heartschooling

5:12 PM, Mar. 3, 2006

In Memory of Missey Gray

The mother's heart is the child's schoolroom.

The academics are important, but the heart-set is even more so. That's why I like to say that we are "HeartSchooling" -- it puts my focus back where it ought to be and helps me keep my priorities straight. - Missey Gray

Missey Gray of Heartschooling passed away on March 1st while giving birth to her daughter, Melissa Kate. Missey was the devoted wife of Tom. She was a dedicated mother to Nathaniel, Samantha, Susan, Natalie, and newborn Melissa.. Missey was also the friend to many in Arkansas and online. She began several Yahoo Groups to encourage woman in the Lord and homeschooling. Most notably Basically Beechick. Missy has been a tremendous source of wisdom and encouragement to so many ladies in the homeschool community. If you would like to send a note of encouragement to the family you can send it to:

Solid Rock HAS
Atten: Tom Gray
PO Box 22254
Hot Springs, AR 71903-2254

If you would like to help the family, a Missey Gray Fund has been set up to accept donations.

If you would like to take part in an heirloom quilt project for the family, please email Beth at: shieldsfamily5 [at] yahoo [dot] com. She has further details on her blog.

We would like to share the tributes from many of Missey's friends.

I visited with Tom this morning for an hour or so at the hospital. He spent a lot of time talking about Missey and the things he was going to miss about her. He talked about all of her online friends and how important they were to her. He said he'd occasionally read some of the comments from others about how much she'd helped them and it made him so proud of her. He said he'd always wanted to take those letters and show them to the guys he worked with and tell them, "See, this is the woman I married! Isn't she wonderful?!!" ~Sue Conry

Editors note: Missey greatly admired the writings of Ruth Beechick. Here is a comment from Ruth:

I'm sure I missed a great blessing by not knowing Missey personally. From her writings I can see that she was a great promoter of all that is right and courageous about homeschooling in our times. She put the heart first, above academics. She put family first, and that is where lies the strength of our society. In Heaven, she can have no regrets about what she has left behind. She need not wish she had done things differently. She certainly heard the words, "Well done, my good and faithful servant." May this thought of our Lord bring some measure of comfort to her loved ones and family. - Ruth Beechick

We were a group of 5 friends who talked via email almost daily. Some people may think it odd that 5 ladies, who have never seen each other, could have such close friendships, but we did, especially with Missey. Although I never had the privilege of meeting Missey in person, I will always consider her one of my best friends. ~ Greta (also known as Lea)

I met Missey in August 2001 when I joined her Basically Beechick list. I immediately recognized her gift for helping other people and sharing her knowledge. She was a consummate reader and was already to share her latest nugget of wisdom. She often created wonderful reviews, lists, and other tools to share with others in the homeschooling community. ~ Loa

Ingredients:  Gather together hearts who love children, homeschooling, Ruth Beechick, books, etc.  Blend together in an e-mail loop where ideas can be shared. Keep warm in an environment of conducive to friendship. Final product = kindred spirits uplifted and encouraged by one another unto greater things.

That is what I feel Missey contributed on the Beechick list, though so much more than that. She had talent. She had a lot of heart. She was bursting with enthusiam. She could have kept it all to herself, but it was "her" to share, and help anyone she could. You saw right off the bat that her heart was towards her family, giving her all -- and encouraging others to do the same. ~ Deb (PattyCake)

More than that, she taught me that friends never have to meet in real life in order to inspire, teach and encourage each other. She also taught me, through her example, how to be a better wife and mother. ~ Darla

Dear Lord,

Why did you take her? I know you know best but oh how hard it is! Please take care of Tom and the kids and the little baby girl who will have to wait to meet her mother. Who knew I could feel so much pain losing someone I've never met in real life? Missey started so many groups and reached out to so many of us. The friends I have in this group I never would have met if it wasn't for Missey. She introduced me to the online homeschool community. Thank you for her friendliness and her initiative. Thank you for herwillingness to share what she learned with so many. Thank you for the connections we have because of her. Lord, be with her family. Oh, the pain and confusion they must be feeling now. Wrap your arms around them and comfort them. We know she is with you now and for that we praise you and thank you.

~Krystal

My heart breaks for your family, Tom... for you and the children. No words can express how bright Missey's light was and how she touched so many of us. I'd known her since 2001and have shared conversations with her of her love of you, her children, her family, and homeschooling.

I have such strong visual memories of me sitting in our school room in VA and me spending just loads of time on the PC messaging Missey about so many things... we're both chart/list makers, both plan like crazy only to have to change something later, etc. We were both crazy in love with planning our homeschooling lessons. I bought my Five in a Row audio tapes from her. I shared my Handwriting Without Tears font with her. She shared many of her files with me. Her love and fortitude for homeschooling was contagious. We drifted in our friendship from time to time, but always popped back in and picked up where we left off. I've dropped emails to her from time to time just to check in and chat. I'm sure going to miss that.

I had always thought Missey had a gift for teaching from her heart (thus I found her blog name "heartschooling" so perfect).... teaching both children as well as adults, fellow homeschoolers. I know so many, many homeschooling moms looked to her for possibilities... possible ways to do XYZ, think about ABC, etc.

Here we all thought she was already blessing us with her mind and heart, and thought that was more than enough. Now she's blessed us through her short life to have each of us look within our own selves, our own lives, to do a "check up" on where we stand with the Lord, our spouses, our children, our family,and more.

I'm not sure exactly why her passing is hitting me so so strongly. More so, I think. than any of my grandparents' deaths. Perhaps it is because "she's like me"... a young(ish) mom, full of life, a peer. This isnt' suppose to happen to folks like me. I've got to take all this to heart, deep into my heart, and truly feel the conviction the Lord is putting on me to live my life as He wants me to. In all aspects of my life. I find a glimpse of solace knowing full well that Missey knew and loved the Lord and is with Him now. He'll be proud of the way she lived and how she left things. Me, I know
I have work to do.

I know nothing will make this tragedy better, but know that your whole family is greatly covered in prayer by so many, many people from all over. My only joy in this is knowing that Missey loved the Lord and is home with Him. May we all have that blessing.

Blessinsg of comfort,
Angi B. (Peakmore Academy)
Honolulu, HI

Missey was a friend of mine, someone I never met face to face but knew from words and pictures sent across the internet. Girls in Easter dresses, Missey standing at the zoo, the baby in his stroller, the girls standing beside her holding hands smiling, a picnic in the new yard, by the stream, Missey holding her youngest daughter who needed comfort from a boo boo, Nathan after surgery, his scar healed. Birthdays, presents piled, character cakes, all four of the children piled into a riding toy, their beautiful faces smiling for Mom. All Missey, all family.

We met five or more years ago, in a preschool homeschool group on line. Our children were similar ages. She had so much to share about Ruth Beechick and skills list and Early Education at home. As her knowledge of home school methods grew so did her files of how to combine this program with that, the best way to write your own Beechick LA lessons, how to use dictation and narration and what AO history books fit into what time period. She had a love of making lists and forms and a love of sharing and teaching, not only her own children but other HS Mom's
as well. It was contagious and glorious and inspiring to read her words, her enthusiasm, her desire to help.

Missey and I were both teachers before home schooling, we shared that experience. That love of learning and desire to encourage.

I will never not think of her when I hear the name Ruth Beechick or dictation or narration or Charlotte Mason or Ambelside. When I see black composition books, I will remember Missey saying the children brought just one book and pencil to sit with her each day.

When I see home made planner I will remember the time she bound hers at the office supply and was so happy to have it done her way. When people share pdf files I will remember Missey who first showed me fine print a program that allows you to make pdf's. When I see Zorro I will think of her and how much she enjoyed staying up late to watch that with her oldest children. When I see juicy juice I'll remember a perfect day she wrote about and ended with saying how all the children remembered to throw their juice boxes in the outside trash. Missey shared pictures of how she decluttered her dryer top in a email group we were both on for cleaning and she was so proud, the dryer looked good too. I remember how happy she was to declutter a room she wanted to clean up for a long time.

She was so happy to have her Mother in law close and spoke of how blessed she was to have the farm for the girls and how her Mother in law helped her by watching the children in the afternoons. I remember how excited she was that Tom gave her money to spend at the HS convention and how thrilled she was he got a library card in his name for her to use. I remember how proud she was of her daughter's Columbus narration and recently her youngest coming along so well in reading. She taught a Five in a Row book to her HS group and her Mom helped her prepare the materials I remember the excited email she wrote about the day and how well it went.

Missey was the one I wrote to when I needed to know about curriculum, it was her advice I wanted. What did she think? How did she do this? Did that work and why? I counted on that, I want that . . . and am overcome with grief...

I know God has a plan and I'm trying to understand... I'm praying for you all, Tom, for the girls, for sweet Nathan for baby Melissa.
Love in Christ,
~ Susan

Wow, I am hit so hard by Missey's passing...I am so glad to know she is with her Lord...but my heart aches for her family, who still need her. I am 30-something too; I have 3 kids, including a baby girl. I realize, it could have been me. I am grateful to be here, but, my heart absolutely breaks for the family of another homeschooling Mom...a Mom just like me...I pray and I pray and I know I can trust the Lord with the well-being of Missey's family; each one of them! Yet I still cannot get this off my mind. So I pray some more. Missey gave so much and it sounded like she had more left to give. I know she is in heaven, looking down and sending her love to her blessed family. May God wrap His arms around that Daddy, his 3 "big" girls, his little boy, and his new baby girl.

-Danielle

I met Missey through your Basically Beechick group. It was through Missey that I discovered the Homeschool blogging site. She inspired me, encouraged me and made me want to be a better person.

Tom, Nathaniel, Samantha, Susan, Natalie and Melissa- We keep you in our prayers.

In God's Grace,
Janny Roebuck

You've received so many comments on how Missey has blessed our lives. Though I only saw her in cyberspace sporadically, I just always felt like she was a kindred spirit, and I am so moved to see how many others felt the same way. I want to thank you sweet children for sharing your mother with us. The time she spent typing on that computer has blessed, edified, encouraged and educated so many other homeschooling mothers. And remember that all this knowledge that she was able to share with others came about because she was looking for the best way to teach you, her own beloved children.

Missey's work among us has inspired me so. Your neighbors perhaps recognized your mother as the lady down the street who has a bunch of kids and homeschools. But now you know that hundreds of women thought of your mother as a valuable resource as well as a friend.

I grieve so for your loss and I join in the hundreds of prayers for your comfort in the days ahead, and I add my voice to the hundreds rising up to call her blessed and say, "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all." - Carol S.

I met Missey briefly last summer at the AO conference in Dallas. I have benefited from her organizational skills and charts. Though our encounter was only for a passing moment, it has changed the life of my family and children as we are homeschooling instead of other options.

May the Great Comforter surround your family as you grieve this blessed wife and mother. May you feel His presence each and every moment.

We are praying for you , Tom and your dear children that their mother's love and joy will shine in each of their lives as they are a reflection of the Lord and her.

The AO homeschool community is like an extended family and we all are sad and wish we could be there to bring hams and cakes and play with the kids and sweep the kitchen and love you all in the love of the Lord. I wrote a post at my blog to honor this mom. – Athenainaminivan

I have been in shock for 24 hours just hearing about Missey, but this morning I am again in shock to read that she lived 30 minutes from me! Missey recently welcomed me and corresponded with me about AO and specifically AO in AR. I never asked her exactly where she lived, but I am so sad that I could have MET her!

Missey was full of warmth and welcome for a newbie. Her counsel and advice was never condescending, but always encouraging. She made me feel like I could do this overwhelming job and it didn't have to look like anyone else’s.......just find out what God wanted me to do with my family.

Her love for her family and her Lord was first and foremost and we could see it even without knowing her personally. It was on every page of her writings, in every question that she answered. She knew so much about how to train and teach her children! She couldn't wait to help others in that area!

I have benefited and been blessed by her kind words, her wealth of knowledge, her example in love. My heart is breaking for Tom and her children. Even though I don't know you, I have been in prayer and tears for you since I found out. I pray that God will sustain you as only He can. It is hard for me to grasp, yet I know He holds the future in His hands. And I know that Missey is having the time of her life! I just have to keep that picture in my mind in order to deal with this.

Thank you, Lord, for allowing me to become slightly acquainted with this JOYFUL servant of Yours. She blessed so many! - Becky in AR

I didn't know Missey -- but, when Gena at TOS posted about what had happened, I felt a sense of loss. Perhaps it was because she was a dear sister in the Lord, or that she was a homeschooling mom like me. In any event, I've been praying for the loved ones who were left behind. Such sadness. But, there is joy in knowing that this family will be reunited one day -- all sitting at the feet of Jesus.

So sorry for this loss. -Melanie

I too was blessed by Missey....all the online support and sharing of her homeschooling, organizational talents mostly through her blog. Looking forward to meeting her in Heaven and getting to know her better.

Her family is in our prayers day and night...asking, pleading for the Holy Spirits comforting power and the Almighty God to guide her loved ones courageously onward down this path of life...until Heaven's glory....Well done, thou good and faithful Servant."

Thanking God for baby Melissa Kate, "a sweet new blossom, fresh fallen from the Hand of God...to flower on earth."

In Christian Love, the Dickinson Family, CO

When Missey was a teen she was a feminist. At that time Missey said she would never let a man tell her what to do and that-get this-she would never have children. Most of her class mates from highschool traveled in for Missey's funeral and they were SHOCKED that Missey was such a devoted wife, had all those youngin's and homeschooled them on top of that! ~ Deb at PattyCake who posted an update and message from from Tom.  Read more here.

Like so many others, I never met Missey in real life. And yet, also like so many others, I considered her a friend. I knew her from the Five in a Row boards and the RAK list. Just last month I sent her a a bunch of cassettes of toddler songs she wanted for her "little guy." She even once let me borrow her Sequential Spelling just so I could see if it was something that would work for my family. I've since bought Sequential Spelling and every day I open it I have and will continue to think of Missey.

Her heart was definitely for homeschooling and for helping others homeschool. She will be missed. She touched so many lives and in so many ways. I like how one person on the Beechick list put it. She said Missey spent her life doing what the Lord said, "If you love me, feed my sheep." Many of us in the homeschooling community sat at her feet and learned. We were fed, oh how we were fed!

Tom, Samantha, Susan, Natalie, Nathaniel, Melissa Kate.....I know Missey's time here on Earth was all too brief. Please be comforted and encouraged that you will see her again. May the Father hold you and comfort you. When you are overcome, just let go and let God. You will be in the prayers of many for a very, very long time. May the CD that it is put together help you all to understand how much we too loved Missey and what an impact she made on our lives as well. Her legacy will live on, not only in her family but in the homeschooling world as well. She will not be forgotten.

If you would like to add your thoughts please leave a comment or send an email to spunkyhomeschool [at] yahoo [dot] com. We will be updating this post throughout the day. We are going to compile all the tributes from her family and friends onto a CD for her children.

Deb at PattyCake has been posting updates throughout the day as well.

34 comments, Link
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Comments
Missey Gray

12:42 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by Darla

Missey was my first true online friend. She taught me how to add stationary
to my e-mails, how to set up my PayPal and Messenger accounts, and how to
use emoticons. But more than that, she taught me that friends never have to
meet in real life in order to inspire, teach and encourage each other. She
also taught me, through her example, how to be a better wife and mother.

Her online names were Just-a-Happy-Girl and Sparky, and her personality
shone through her posts. She was full of enthusiasm for her family and
homeschooling. I was on several e-mail groups with Missey and if there was
ever a lull in conversation, one post from her would get us all going! She
was a natural leader and brought many people together. I am going to miss
her.

Over the Fence

2:09 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by Loa

Dear Friend,

Just know that I am looking foward to meeting you at the back-fence!

Loa

Over The Fence

Over the fence we chat each day

And sometimes things we say

Crack us up and make us laugh

It makes for a happy day!

"Over the fence" I might say

But what I really mean

Is online chit chat with a friend

Though your face I've never seen!

Many things we chat about

We trade recipes and jokes

Solving life's little problems

And picking on famous folks!

We've traded pictures of ourselves

But what I didn't say

The picture I sent is 20 years old

It looks better than I look today!

I guess the thing I'd like to say

Is thank you very much

For sharing, caring, and having fun

My heart you really touch!

~ Charlotte Anselmo ~

I Can Only Imagine

2:16 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by Pattycake

Somebody very appropriately left this slide presentation in the comments on Missey's blog. I also placed it after her obituary on my blog here:

http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/Pattycake/93621/

I really think we need to see Missey here ~ in all His glory.

I Can Only Imagine:
http://www.andiesisle.com/icanonlyimagine.html

Missing Missey

3:00 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by parkwaymom

I keep wandering around HSB's Company Porch, missing Missey. . . a friend I found . . . a little bit too late.

I lost my dear aunt last September . . . she left two precious daughters (age 13 and 16). How thankful I am that she home educated, and was able to pour herself into her daughters for the too short years God gave her to raise them. My cousins are beautiful reflections of their mother, as I know Missey's children will be of her.

I want to meet all of you "Over the Back Fence" . . . lovely poem, LOA!

And then what a beautiful vision at the end of the song, "I can only imagine" of the woman with her arms raised to Jesus, in worship . . . much like our little ones raise their arms to us. "Up! Please!"

PattyCake, This is how I want to think of Missey!

Praying all of the Family and Friends of Missey
find Comfort in Jesus' Arms,
ParkwayMom

Untitled Comment

3:06 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by garflick

I've known Missey online for about 5 years. I'm deeply saddened and pray for her children and her husband.She was such a positive person, an inspiration to us homeschooling mothers.

For those who suffer,
and those who cry this night,
give them repose, Lord;
a pause in their burdens.
Let there be minutes
where they experience peace,
not of man
but of angels.
Love them, Lord,
when others cannot.
Hold them, Lord,
when we fail with human arms.
Hear their prayers
and give them the ability to hear You back
in whatever language they best understand.

Roxanne Flick

Missing Missey

5:11 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by Pammy

I have known Missey for 5 years, and have been so blessed by her helpful posts both at the FIAR board and BasicallyBeechick group. I have both bought and sold curriculum to her and we had similar interests. I am going to miss her. She died on my Birthday, and I will always remember her. I also had Placenta Previa with one of my children, and almost died at 30. That baby is fine today, and her name is Hope, and her Birthday is Sunday. I can only imagine the grief and sorrow Missey's dear children and family are feeling. I am praying for them and I know that God will hear their cry and be their Comforter.

I have also come to appreciate my role as a HS mom more now, I never realized how fragile life can be til all this made me look at the similarities with my difficult pregnancies and realize it could have been me. I will really miss seeing her friendly smilies and reading her posts.

I look forward to meeting you in GLORY one day Missey!
Love,
Pammy

Missey

5:17 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by Anonymous

Wow, I am hit so hard by Missey's passing...I am so glad to know she is with her Lord...but my heart aches for her family, who still need her. I am 30-something too; I have 3 kids, including a baby girl. I realize, it could have been me. I am grateful to be here, but, my heart absolutely breaks for the family of another homeschooling Mom...a Mom just like me...I pray and I pray and I know I can trust the Lord with the well-being of Missey's family; each one of them! Yet I still cannot get this off my mind. So I pray some more. Missey gave so much and it sounded like she had more left to give. I know she is in heaven, looking down and sending her love to her blessed family. May God wrap His arms around that Daddy, his 3 "big" girls, his little boy, and his new baby girl. {{{{hugs}}}} Danielle

Untitled Comment

5:59 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by HomeEducatingMooreWays

I met Missey through your Basically Beechick group. It was through Missey that I discovered the Homeschool blogging site. She inspired me, encouraged me and made me want to be a better person.

Tom, Nathaniel, Samantha, Susan, Natalie and Melissa- We keep you in our prayers.

In God's Grace,

Janny Roebuck

A quilt for the family

9:31 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by LIFE

We are now making 6 total quilts.

Someone suggested we make a Quilt for Tom in rememberance of Missey.
I think this is a wonderful idea.

Here is where we are now.

I have 50 volunteers, we are needing well over 100 squares. I do not
have the dimensions yet, and I am hoping more people will help out.
I will be sending out an information email tomorrow with dimensions
and all pertinent information, colors, material, my address and the
deadline. I will also assign you a childs quilt. That way you can
pray with each stitch for that child.

I am hoping to get the quilts to the family by the end of the month.
Which means I will have to sew together 6 quilts in that time. So
ultimately, once I send out the emails tomorrow with all the
information I am needing a rather quick turnaround. I will send
more information about that tomorrow. THIS IS UPDATED, A few emails have come across asking for the quilts to be professionally finished. This would assure they would be heirloom quality and last the childs lifetime. I am willing to pay for that, but I am hoping some others will feel led to donate to that as well. I can provide a snail mail address or paypal account so we can pay for them to be bound professionally.

Lastly, Please forward this to anyone you think could help. or contact me
shieldsfamily5@yahoo.com
Serving Him, Beth

Missey Gray

9:48 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by Ruth Beechick

I'm sure I missed a great blessing by not knowing Missey personally. From her writings I can see that she was a great promoter of all that is right and courageous about homeschooling in our times. She put the heart first, above academics. She put family first, and that is where lies the strength of our society. In Heaven, she can have no regrets about what she has left behind. She need not wish she had done things differently. She certainly heard the words, "Well done, my good and faithful servant." May this thought of our Lord bring some measure of comfort to her loved ones and family.

Ruth Beechick

Thank you, Gray Family

11:35 PM, Mar. 3, 2006, posted by Carol S

You've received so many comments on how Missey has blessed our lives. Though I only saw her in cyberspace sporadically, I just always felt like she was a kindred spirit, and I am so moved to see how many others felt the same way. I want to thank you sweet children for sharing your mother with us. The time she spent typing on that computer has blessed, edified, encouraged and educated so many other homeschooling mothers. And remember that all this knowledge that she was able to share with others came about because she was looking for the best way to teach you, her own beloved children.

Missey's work among us has inspired me so. Your neighbors perhaps recognized your mother as the lady down the street who has a bunch of kids and homeschools. But now you know that hundreds of women thought of your mother as a valuable resource as well as a friend.

I grieve so for your loss and I join in the hundreds of prayers for your comfort in the days ahead, and I add my voice to the hundreds rising up to call her blessed and say, "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."

Only a Passing Moment

12:31 AM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by Athenainaminivan

I met Missey briefly last summer at the AO conference in Dallas. I have benefited from her organizational skills and charts. Though our encounter was only for a passing moment, it has changed the life of my family and children as we are homeschooling instead of other options.

May the Great Comforter surround your family as you grieve this blessed wife and mother. May you feel His presence each and every moment.

We are praying for you , Tom and your dear children that their mother's love and joy will shine in each of their lives as they are a reflection of the Lord and her.

The AO homeschool community is like an extended family and we all are sad and wish we could be there to bring hams and cakes and play with the kids and sweep the kitchen and love you all in the love of the Lord. I wrote a post at my blog to honor this mom.

Missey

9:28 AM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by boo4baby

I have been in shock for 24 hours just hearing about Missey, but this morning I am again in shock to read that she lived 30 minutes from me! Missey recently welcomed me and corresponded with me about AO and specifically AO in AR. I never asked her exactly where she lived, but I am so sad that I could have MET her!

Missey was full of warmth and welcome for a newbie. Her counsel and advice was never condescending, but always encouraging. She made me feel like I could do this overwhelming job and it didn't have to look like anyone elses.......just find out what God wanted me to do with my family.

Her love for her family and her Lord was first and foremost and we could see it even without knowing her personally. It was on every page of her writings, in every question that she answered. She knew so much about how to train and teach her children! She couldn't wait to help others in that area!

I have benefitted and been blessed by her kind words, her wealth of knowledge, her example in love. My heart is breaking for Tom and her children. Even though I don't know you, I have been in prayer and tears for you since I found out. I pray that God will sustain you as only He can. It is hard for me to grasp, yet I know He holds the future in His hands. And I know that Missey is having the time of her life! I just have to keep that picture in my mind in order to deal with this.

Thank you, Lord, for allowing me to become slightly acquainted with this JOYFUL servant of Yours. She blessed so many!

Becky in AR

: )

9:50 AM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by mrsclark

I didn't know Misey -- but, when Gena at TOS posted about what had happened, I felt a sense of loss. Perhaps it was because she was a dear sister in the Lord, or that she was a homeschooling mom like me. In any event, I've been praying for the loved ones who were left behind. Such sadness. But, there is joy in knowing that this family will be reunited one day -- all sitting at the feet of Jesus.

So sorry for this loss.

Melanie

Untitled Comment

2:10 PM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by Dickinsonfamily

I too was blessed by Missey....all the online support and sharing of her homeschooling, organizational talents mostly through her blog. Looking forward to meeting her in Heaven and getting to know her better.

Her family is in our prayers day and night...asking,pleading for the Holy Spirits comforting power and the Almighty God to guide her loved ones courageously onward down this path of life...until Heaven's glory....Well done, thou good and faithful Servant."

Thanking God for baby Melissa Kate, "a sweet new blossom, fresh fallen from the Hand of God...to flower on earth."

In Christian Love, The Dickinson Family, CO

Untitled Comment

2:23 PM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by AiBoon

I didn't have the privilege of knowing Missey and only read about her from Amy's blog. I wished I had known her. This morning, even as the family bids her "Farewell", I pray along with all of you that our God will meet them in their time of greatest need, in their time of grief.

The Lord gave me a song for Tom Gray and his children:

H12 Deep is my Father’s love
5.3.2006, 2.45 a.m.
Ref: Ephesians 3:18, Isaiah 45:2, Psalm 146:5-6

For Tom Gray and children,
in memory of Missey

Wide, wide is His love,
Long, long is His love.
High, high is His love,
Deep is my Father’s love.
Stay close to my Father,
Hang on to His hand,
Don’t ever let it go,
He is your friend.

Wide, wide is His love,
Long, long is His love.
High, high is His love,
Deep is my Father’s love.
Stay close to my Father,
Weep on His shoulders,
Don’t worry about tomorrow,
He is your friend.

Wide, wide is His love,
Long, long is His love.
High, high is His love,
Deep is my Father’s love.
Stay close to my Father,
Rest upon His heart,
Let His peace wash over you,
He is your friend.

Wide, wide is His love,
Long, long is His love.
High, high is His love,
Deep is my Father’s love.

Thank You Lord.

Shalom.

Ai Boon

Thank you, Missey

3:33 PM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by janicecampbell

Missey, in life and in death, reminds us that it is the moments that matter.

For mothers especially, the days spent with our children are precious and all too fleeting. It's important to keep perspective, know who and what is important, and to live life with eternity in view, because we are not promised there will be a tomorrow.

Someday, we will be able to say "thank you, Missey, for sharpening our perspective." Your family is in our thoughts and prayers.

Janice Campbell

Untitled Comment

6:35 PM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by Anonymous

I am so sorry for your Loss. Missy was a special person I met her on the FIAR freinds group when I first started schooling on my own. Missy was one person I could ask questions she always answered. She never let me down. Her advice will be sorely missed. I wish I could give you all a hug
My heart and prayers go out to you through this time
hugs and cuddles
bye Toni in Australia

Untitled Comment

6:36 PM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by Anonymous

I am so sorry for your Loss. Missy was a special person I met her on the FIAR freinds group when I first started schooling on my own. Missy was one person I could ask questions she always answered. She never let me down. Her advice will be sorely missed. I wish I could give you all a hug
My heart and prayers go out to you through this time
hugs and cuddles
bye Toni in Australia

Untitled Comment

6:36 PM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by Anonymous

I am so sorry for your Loss. Missy was a special person I met her on the FIAR freinds group when I first started schooling on my own. Missy was one person I could ask questions she always answered. She never let me down. Her advice will be sorely missed. I wish I could give you all a hug
My heart and prayers go out to you through this time
hugs and cuddles
bye Toni in Australia

So sorry....

7:54 PM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by

I only 'met' Missey online a few months ago, but how I looked forward to reading her blog entries, seeing her weekly schedules was helpful as a newbie homeschooler trying to find my rythmn and routine. Hers was one of those "really good" blogs that I visited each time I was on HSB. I am so very saddened and shocked by the devestating news.....and surprised at how heavy my heart is for not having known her IRL or even for very long online. Maybe because we are both homeschooling moms, or I have six children and realize it could have easily been me, the fact that she was so loving and helpful, visualizing her heartbroken children and dh.......all of it. I pray and find myself praying again. I pray God will minister to your familly in a Mighty way, and wrap His loving arms around you during these suffocating times, guide your family as you move forward, and draw you and your children incredibly close to Himself.
Jenn

Edited by jammyphoto on Mar. 4, 2006 at 4:56 PM

How very sad to hear such news

9:14 PM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by Homelifeacademyalexa

Our prayers are with your family.

My mom almost died Dec 16th when a tubal pregnancy ruptured causing massive internal injuries so I know how hard it can be on the whole family when such sadness strikes.

My the lord be with you and your family during this time.

Thank you...

11:44 PM, Mar. 4, 2006, posted by GraphicGraffiti

...to HSB's Company Porch for setting up this "memorial" for Missey Gray.

Although I knew nothing about her until after her death, I (like so many others) have been deeply touched by her love for her family, others, and the Lord. Her blog is so precious to read.

May God bless you and keep you, Tom, Nathaniel, Samantha, Susan, Natalie, and little Melissa Kate! You are in our hearts and prayers!

missey gray (my cousin)

9:55 AM, Mar. 5, 2006, posted by kimberly

missey is my cousin yes i use the word is because to me she will always be here. everything i that have read is so true, how she is planned everthing out, good listener, gives advice, loves loves loves her family, but now i am going to tell everyone about the little missey i grew up with.
missey was the oldest, then there was robin, and me. missey always came in first, robin second and me last. we all loved playing in the woods, we would pack a lunch and go hiking in the back yard. one of our favorite times was scratching our grandmothers head while she would tell us ghost stories, missey loved to hear stories.
she stayed with my grandmother a lot, and she lived right next door to me. so i would always look over to see if her bedroom light was on to see if she could spend the night. missey taught me to put on make-up, talk to boys, read girly magezines and we would stay up late, one of missey's favorite things to eat was pickles with a glass of strawberry milk or we would fix salsa dip with shredded cheese in it with doritos and dr pepper and watch grease, girls just want to have fun, or if it was a saturdaynight she would not miss saturdaynight live that was her favorite. on sundays when we went to church with my grandmother we would stop at the store and set something to eat we would get a bag of doritos and a can of frito lay bean dip and a dr pepper and that was for breakfast. sundaynight after church we would stop and wendys and get a taco salad.
in school missey wasn't miss popularity but she did not turn her back on anybody. she tried basketball and cheerleading. and then just stuck with the books. but she was really good at cheerleading. if i had a problem with my homework she would help me out. boy problems she knew what to say. she always had an answer.
i remember us talking about how we would try to have our kids at the same time so they would be close like us, and she definately made sure that happened, i have an 8 and a 6 yr old. but i live in arkadelphia, we still stayed in touch , just not like we should have.
missey talked about her knight in shinning armour finding her and taking her away and having lots of kids. and when she found tom she told me i found him, and that was it . then came samantha , suzie, natalie, nathan, and melissa. she got everything she wanted and asked for.
tom you said you hoped missey knew how much she ment to you but i really hope you know how much you ment to her. girls and nathan , without you and your dad and above all god, her life would have ment nothing. you gave her everything she wanted and more. no amount of money or gifts could have made your mothers life more fullfilling then you did. i love you and will always be here.
love, kimberly

Thankyou Kimberly

2:28 PM, Mar. 5, 2006, posted by Kristal

Thankyou for your post it was beautiful! I sorry for your loss! I will continue to pray for your family!!

<i>Untitled Comment</i>

5:51 PM, Mar. 5, 2006, posted by

Thank you for this beautiful memorial on Missy. I did not know her at all. But even now, after her death, she is affecting people with her energetic and committed spirit. I, like many others, feel that a true sister has been taken. My heart is sad for the loss of her, and especially sad for her husband and little ones. Holding on to the hope Jesus offered is the only thing that can comfort at this time.

Thank you again for pulling this together. It's a beautiful tribute.

( I tried to trackback, but for whatever reason, I could not. I did link to it because I want people to read this. )

Edited by OreoSouza on Mar. 5, 2006 at 2:57 PM

my cousin

11:18 PM, Mar. 5, 2006, posted by kimberly

as the day went on today i got to thinking more of what we use to do and things we use to say so here is a little more info.on someone who i considered my big sis
when we were growing up we used to go to yard sales and we loved that because when the day was over my mother and grandmother would take us to dairy queen for ice cream. missey always loved to dress up and wear high-heels, one day she nearly broke her neck going down our stairs trying to catch the bus. we loved pushing each other on the tire swing in my grandmothers front yard, smelling and picking her pink and white roses that we were not supposed to be messing with. i can not tell you how many trees we climbed and fell out of, missey loved riding her banana seated bicycle, we went everywhere on that thing. in the summer time we would go to a place called clusters, it was very cold b/c it was a natural spring, but we went anyway, she loved the water. well she just loved getting in a bathing suit and prancing around like a beauty queen in a talent show. she even had her own store at my uncle james house, and made me pay real money, she had fortunes, pencils, stickers, candy, just anything you could think of she was always trying to make money. we would set up a lemonade stand at my parents house to try and make some money but we were not allowed to put the sign on the outside of the fence. and we would just stay up for hours and hours just talking about everything.
she loved her barbie dolls, she had the three story house with elevator, i was so jealous. she would cook me brownines in her easy bake oven if we did not eat all the batter first.missey loved to play school, she of course was the teacher, i the student. she hung posters out of her magezines on the walls at grandmas of movie stars she had a crush on , always rearranging her room or my room. she was such a busy body. i remember when tom bought her a convertible after they had been together for a little while before samantha came boy she was on cloud nine. and since then she has not gotten off. if anything that cloud has just risen higher and higher. i love you missey and will never forget.
love kimberly

Untitled Comment

10:36 AM, Mar. 6, 2006, posted by Titus2woman

I wish I knew exactly what to say! I only know that my life has been inspired by Missey, and so her influence will be alive for generations to come through our family and the many others she touched~for the better! (((((HUGS))))) and prayers, ~sandi

Quilting for Missey's Children with my Daughter: A Wonderful Blessing

3:36 PM, Mar. 6, 2006, posted by Heather in Arkansas

My daughter just turned 10 on Friday. She has been begging me for a couple of months to teach her to sew on the sewing machine. She has also been begging to make a quilt with me. Things have been so busy that I just haven't made the time to do either. Well, I decided that I wanted to participate in making the blocks for the quilts for Missey's children. I also thought that in addition to blessing her children I could use this as an opportunity to bless and love on my own daughter. Last night we went shopping for the "just right" bundle of fat quarters at Wal-Mart, spent over an hour choosing and checking out quilting books from the library to decide exactly which block designs to use, and came home to make brownies, look at the books and decide. This afternoon after church Kaity and I went to my dear grandmother's house where she helped us make templates and cut out the fabric pieces for our blocks. Then I spent the rest of the afternoon with Kaity in my grandmother's sewing room teaching her step by step how to sew starting with how to thread the machine correctly. I guided Kaity as she practiced on scrap material until she felt comfortable making a good, straight seem. Then we (actually she all by herself with minimal help from me) started slowly sewing the pieces together to make our first 2 blocks. We spend about 4 hours in the sewing room together with my grandmother and came out with 2 beautiful blocks. I am a scrapbooker and took pictures throughout the afternoon to make a "teaching Kaity how to sew" page for her scrapbook.

The experience of teaching my daughter to sew while working on the quilt block project for Missey's children has been one of the greatest blessings that Kaity and I (and my grandmother) have received in a very long time. Kaity said this was the "best weekend of her life".

Blessings to you,
Heather in Arkansas

A day to celebrate what Missey believed in...

9:54 PM, Mar. 6, 2006, posted by DandelionSeeds

I have posted "A Mother's T.R.E.K." in honor of Missey. Please read the post and pass it on for those who would like to celebrate her life in this way as well.

In Him,
Amy

I'm just a guest here

1:54 AM, Mar. 8, 2006, posted by Anonymous

I am only a guest here. I don't know who she is, but I wanted to share that I am a homeschooling Mom and I truly feel sorrow in my heart for her family. I have four young children and I am almost 30. I cannot fathom the "hole" she has left behind. The only bright side to this is that all the charts and everything she created will be a huge help for her husband or whoever takes charge of the household. I will be praying for this special family and that they hold strong in Christ.

Love Julie Ann
(xanga name cuemommy)

Untitled Comment

9:20 AM, Mar. 8, 2006, posted by Anonymous

Like so many others, I never met Missey IRL. And yet, also like so many others, I considered her a friend. I knew her from the Five in a Row boards and the RAK list. Just last month I sent her a a bunch of cassettes of toddler songs she wanted for her "little guy." She even once let me borrow her Sequential Spelling just so I could see if it was something that would work for my family. I've since bought Sequential Spelling and every day I open it I have and will continue to think of Missey.

Her heart was definitely for homeschooling and for helping others homeschool. She will be missed. She touched so many lives and in so many ways. I like how one person on the Beechick list put it. She said Missey spent her life doing what the Lord said, "If you love me, feed my sheep." Many of us in the homeschooling community sat at her feet and learned. We were fed, oh how we were fed!

Tom, Samantha, Susan, Natalie, Nathaniel, Melissa Kate.....I know Missey's time here on Earth was all too brief. Please be comforted and encouraged that you will see her again. May the Father hold you and comfort you. When you are overcome, just let go and let God. You will be in the prayers of many for a very, very long time. May the CD that it is put together help you all to understand how much we too loved Missey and what an impact she made on our lives as well. Her legacy will live on, not only in her family but in the homeschooling world as well. She will not be forgotten.

Untitled Comment

9:35 AM, Mar. 9, 2006, posted by koolaid

Thats realy sad. At least shes in a way better place now. I'll pray for her.

love,koolaid oooooooh yaaaaaa *sticks thumb up*

To The First Amigo( my cousin Missey)

12:13 AM, Mar. 12, 2006, posted by RobinChuang

I made a promise to one of the home schooling parents at the funeral that I would get on the internet and help y’all to know the Missey I knew. To be quite honest, I have felt very uneasy about actually doing it. I don’t know if I could get on the web site and read about and share my cousin. However, after I read all of the wonderful thing y’all have said about Missey, I actually felt better. Missey is a faithful Christian, a devoted wife, an awesome mom, but to me she was one of The Three Amigos. Missey, Kim, and I were always together in our younger days, especially on the weekends and in the summers. Grandma, along with many others, often called us The Three Amigos and sometimes The Three Stooges, but I always liked The Three Amigos much better.

Missey always took care of Kim and me ( in kind of a bossy way), but she still took care of us none the less. She is a natural mom. Missey is the oldest, I am next and Kim is the youngest. Together, Missey and I tortured poor Kim. She was always last, and she may have felt left out at times. But Missey never tolerated anyone (but herself ) to mess with either us. She would always stick up for us. No one was allowed to mistreat us. She has ALWAYS been big on family. She taught me so much about school, family, people and life (more than she will ever know). I am a better person because of Missey.

Missey loved to smell Grandma's roses. In fact, we used to get into trouble for picking Grandma's red roses. I can remember rolling down the hill at Grandma's in a old trash barrel: all three of us in the same barrel at the same time. Missey was fearless when she was younger. If I remember correctly, we got into trouble over that too. When we were together we were experts at getting into trouble. No matter what we did, Kim always got the short end the straw. Yet, we loved being together. We would clean up the play house or camper and make it spotless. After we were finished we didn't even want to play in it. We just enjoyed working together as a team to clean it up. It didn't matter what we were doing as long as we were doing it together.

Missey is a spectacular mom. She teaches her children about God, family, and she home schooled. She loves each one of her kids very much. Her children are so well behaved. They have all of the right values, and they are extremely intelligent. I am a school teacher so I see so many children who desperately need this in their lives. If we would all raise our children the way that Missey raised hers, we would not see all of the problems that we see in this world. I hope that I am half the mom that Missey is.

Last week when my mom came to my house to tell me the news, it felt like a nightmare that you just cannot wake up from, but the true finality did not hit me until the day of the funeral. Missey and I were so close when we were younger. As we grew older, we kind of grew apart. Don't get me wrong, I still talked to her, but we only saw each other two or three times a year. I missed out on so much. I thought I had time..... I was like so many people. I took for granted that she would always be there. There was always tomorrow, but there is no guarantee of tomorrow for anyone. Not even for someone who was
only thirty-one. I do not tell you this because I feel sorry for myself or to make you feel sad or guilty. I tell you this so that everyone may learn from my mistake. Don't take you loved ones for granted. Tell them everyday how much you love them. Don't wait until tomorrow to call or visit with the ones you love because tomorrow may not be there.

I have made a promise to myself not to take the ones I love for granted ever again. I will do my very best to NOT “wait until tomorrow.”

Missey, I also make a promise to you. You will live on through me. I will tell the story of you. I want you to know that I will love you, and you will be one of The Three Amigos for all eternity.

Love,
Robin- The Second Amigo

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