This thought hit me the other day when my family wanted to eat at a taco place.  Why are we asking "The Blessing" over food that is not good for us?  Does God hear us when we knowingly do harm to our bodies?  The typical blessing (at least for our family) is to ask God to bless our food and help it (the food) to give us nourishment.  Would you ask God to bless a cigarette and let the cigarette give you nourishment?  NO!!  Would you drink alcohol and ask Him to let the alcohol give you nourishment.  NO!!  So then, why are we willingly dining out at all these eating places that serve very unhealthy food and asking God to help that fatty burger give us nourishment?  Think about what you are asking Him.  You are asking God to bless that very unhealthy burger, fried chicken, pizza, and taco to your body.  You are asking Him to let all that fat, grease, sodium, and preservatives nourish your body.  Folks, that's just gross.  I'm just as guilty or was until now.  It really hit home this morning when I watched my daughter grab a few chips to nibble on while we drank our morning tea and had our devotions.  We usually ask "the blessing" on just about every thing we eat.  I'm glad God opened my eyes to what we were asking Him.  I certainly DO NOT WANT junk food and fast food to nourish my body.  I want home cooking and fresh fruits and veggies to nourish my body and God's Word to nourish my soul.  By the way, my daughter stopped eating the chips and dumped both bags of chips into the garbage.  YEAH!  She ate a very ripe banana and a slice of homemade bread instead.

We won't be eating out much anymore (we didn't anyway) except for very special occasions.  Maybe not even for that.  Now on to my other soapbox while I'm writing.  I have been trying to get my family to eat healthier, but my dad just 'ain't gonna budge'.  He comes up with all kinds of arguable reasons why his eating habits are good.  1.  I don't eat that much.  2.  Something the bible says about what God called clean let not man call unclean. (NT)  3.  Something else the bible says about blessing food and not asking questions (OT-I think)  4. And the 'best' one I've heard so far - He says that (insert name of food place) has gone healthy.  They have cut out trans fats or are using a good type of lard, etc. Is there a good kind of lard?!  It's still not good for you.  Will someone please tell me how fried chicken can be good for you.  Will someone please tell me how a taco (out-not at home) can be good for you.  And will someone please tell me how a burger can be good for you. Or pizza?  He eat's out (usually chicken) 5 days a week.  How can that be healthy eating.  Eating out is risky.  And if I did have a craving for some 'fast food' I think the next topic would stop me in my tracks.  The workers and the environment.  Have you ever watched your taco or burger or pizza being made?  They don't wear hair nets (so there's a risk of hair in your food), they don't wear gloves (so - well, we won't go there.  Use your imagination as to the possible places the hands could have been), and they talk while throwing your food together (so there's the risk of spit flying into your food).  That folks, is also gross.

I hope I have encouraged some of you to take a closer look at what your eating and what you're asking God to bless as it goes into your body.  We have to have healthy bodies and feel well so we can be of service to Him. Have a wonderful day.

Once upon a time there was this little church in a small town - off the beaten path.  The church needed a pastor.  So this extended family with two preachers in the family decided they would help this little church out and pastor the church.  Some members of this family were very very unhappy about the move.  They were satisfied where they were at.  But they went.  They eventually joined this little church.  All the while wondering why the little church wasn't going anywhere spiritually or growing in number.  Everyone seemed to just be playing church.  But things went on as usual.  One night a few members of this family decided they would go to church early and see what kinds of decorations they could find to make the little church pretty for Christmas.  You will never guess what they discovered.  They discovered that their little church was committing adultery.  They were sleeping with the enemy.  No wonder things seemed at a stand-still.  Those two family members found halloween and mardi-gras stuff in the closet.  Can you believe that?!!  The bride of Christ (the church) was sleeping with the enemy (satan).  The two family members just stood there looking at each other - wondering what they should do about what they had discovered.  They decided to talk with the pastor about their findings.  He acted like it was no big deal.  They were really stunned after that.  What were they to do?.  They went home that night with very heavy hearts for that little church. 

Now for my two-cents - As long as churches hang on to satan in any way, shape, form, or fashion they will never grow spiritually.  Compromising for the sake of the children is WRONG.  You say - "But it's just inocent fun".(Read with sarcasm emphasis)  But is it??  Think about what you are having fun with.  God IS NOT PLEASED with any of this stuff.  Yes, we should do lots and lots of things with the youth of our church - but why does halloween have to be one of those days.  To make it sound christiany they call it a "fall carnival".  Well - have it in november and loose the halloween theme.  I know I'm rambling.  But the best way for me to feel better sometimes is to write my thoughts down.  But there is NO COMPROMISING when it comes to living a christian life.  I have raised my daughter like that.  When it comes to your morals, ethics, and christianity YOU DO NOT COMPROMISE.

Pass that piece of information on.  DO NOT COMPROMISE YOUR SOUL!!

Yes, that's my daughter.  And yes, that is a snake.  In fact, she has two snakes, three hermit crabs, a tarantula, a parakeet, an albino frog, a dwarf hamster, a rabbit, and last but not least, a black lab.  And between the animals and home school, she stays pretty busy.  At least she's having fun.  And, let me add that she is VERY responsible.  She even gets up before I do to tend her animals.  I am very proud of her.

P.S.  I even held the snake.  TWICE!!

What do you do when someone you love dearly(not my daughter - but another young person very dear to me) is going to do something to ruin their life and you are powerless to stop them?  No one even wants to hear the truth.  It is a shame when parents let their kids manipulate them to a point that the parents are blind to what's going on in their kids life.  It's not just secular parents who are like that.  Christian parents are the worst, in my opinion.  (And I AM a christian parent, also.)  I guess the parents don't want to believe their kid would lie to them, do things behind their back, or be anything but good kids.  Boy are they fooled.  That just shows that the devil has his clutches on christian parents too.  He has put blinders on them so he can take their "good little sons and daughters" and they won't know what hit them.  Christian parents out there - YOU NEED TO WAKE UP!!!  You are loosing your children and you won't even realize it until it is tooooo late.  If you love your children - please wake up.  I will be praying for you that God will take those blinders off your eyes and let you wake up and see what's really going on.  If not, then you will loose your children for an eternity.

School hasn't gotten off to a very good start this year.  I'm not sure why.  Some of it might have to do with the fact that Grace is too deeply involved in volunteer and club activities.  Those are great things, but I'm beginning to see them as terrible.  I know I probably shouldn't see it that way, but I want her to stay at home and learn the subjects she said she wanted to study this year.  Life has gotten so hectic since June.  First it was 4HU, then a trip to San Antonio, then school starts back up and her club activities start all over again.  And this time, like a whirlwind.  Will it ever STOP??!!!!  This probably sounds like the diary of a crazy white woman, and it is.  I am fed up with clubs and volunteer work.  Will someone please pray for me.  I'm not usually like this.  I love for Grace to be active in her clubs and in volunteer work, but not when it interferes with her schooling.  I haven't learned to say NO yet.  I wish I didn't have to.  I just want her to get a good education.  But what is a good education?  Is it book knowledge, is it learning to serve others, what?  Who am I to say what God has in store for her.  This love of volunteerism might be God's way of preparing her for the mission field.  Who knows.  But she still needs to be knowledgeable and educated.

Now, don't we feel better??  No.  Not really.  But it feels good to put my thoughts down in writing.

Last Friday, Grace and I went shopping in Shreveport.  This had been in the works for about 2 months.  I was having an ECHO done that day, so we decided to make a day of it.  We both knew that the ECHO wouldn't take too long.  We were right.  We were in the hospital for exactly 1 hour.  How is THAT for service.  We then spent the rest of the day in and out of stores.  We both got to go in stores we really enjoyed shopping in.  It's amazing what you can find in specialty stores.  We'll be going back in a few weeks (another dr. appt.), so I can pick up the items I didn't get to get this time.     On another note - shopping at Wal-Mart has been halted for the time being.  My christian convictions will not allow me to shop at this store.  Reason:  they asked for and was granted permission to become a member of the National Gay & Lesbian "Chamber of Commerce".  Oh well, by halting that shopping, it has forced me to look around at other stores, and guess what?  There are things better than wal-mart out there.  I just had to take the time to look.  Sure it means more stops, but I'm willing to make that sacrifice.  It's worth it.     And another note - My daughter and I were in shock at the tragic way that Steve Erwin (The Cro Hunter) died.  My heart goes out to his wife and two children.  They are in my prayers.  May God be near them and comfort them.  It's rare to see someone that passionate about what they do.  May he be an example to us all.  Whatever you choose as a career in life, let it be something that lights a fire in you.  If not, then life won't be fun.  Life has got to be fun.  Live life!!

Psalms 4:3     But know that the Lord hath set apart him that is godly for himself:  the Lord will hear when I call unto him.  WOW!  God has set me apart from the world, for himself.  And since I am His, He WILL hear me when I call to Him.  How much more comfort does a child of God need than that verse right there.  We are His; and He hears us.  I am my heavenly father's daughter!  God is so awesome, so powerful, so magestic, so magnificant.  And He takes the time to listen to me when I call to Him.  I am so thankful He listens.  If He didn't, there would be no hope for me and I might as well give up on life right now.  But, I don't have to.  Because God DOES listen and, get this, He even answers us.  Life can't get any better than this.  We are Gods and He hears us when we call to Him.  Call on Him today.  He's waiting to hear from you.     Psalms 4: 8     I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep:  for thou, Lord, only makest me dwell in safety.  It's such a wonderful feeling to be able to lay down at night with no worries to keep me up.  I can lay my head on my pillow, close my eyes, and drift off to sleep knowing that God's got my back.  He's watching over me while I sleep.  He's taking care of all those worries that the devil tries to plague me with during the day.  I give them to my heavenly father and He takes care of them for me.  I lay down in peace.  Even though we live in a very unsettled world, even in America, I know I can lay down in peace because if I don't wake up in my bed in the morning, I WILL wake up in a new home in heaven.  So why should I worry.  Either way I've got it made.  Can you honestly take this verse to heart today.  Can you lay down at night with peace in your heart and get a good, restful night sleep.  If the answer is no, then go to God.   He can save you.  Then He can 'lay you down in peace and safety'.     Have a wonderful day in the Lord.  And may God bless you in everything you do today.

A few verses of Scripture to start your day. Psalms 46:1-2a   God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.  Therefore will not we fear......God is my refuge because when no one else could possibly know what I'm thinking, or how I'm feeling, God knows.  A refuge is a place of safety.  God is a place of safety for me.  A place for me to go and take a break from my physical problems, from what may be torturing my mind at the moment, from depression that the devil wants to put on me.  God is an awesome place of refuge.  It's so peaceful there.  I try my best to stay there most of the time.  Sometimes I venture away from that place of refuge, but I quickly come crawling back, because I know that being near God is the safest place I can be.  It's the safest place anyone can be.  God is my strength because I have none of my own.  I have no physical strength without God.  I have no mental strength without God.  I have no emotional strength without God.  I have no spiritual strength without God.  I am weak without God.  God strengthens my physical body on a daily basis.  Some days I need more physical strength than others.  He gives me what I need each day.  For example...Yesterday, Grace and I spent the day in Alexandria.  We left at 7:30a and arrived back home at 6p.  I drove that day. (My mom usually drives me long distances if I need to go.)  If I had left on my own, without God, I wouldn't have made it out of the driveway.  That's how much I need His strength and His help.  I CANNOT go even one day without His strength.  I need His mental strength because, if left to my own devices, I would stay in such a dark place that no one would be able to find me and get me out.  If I stay with God, I find I can pretty much stay out of those dark places.  God is also my emotional strength.  That one I am having to work really hard on.  I really need to let go and let God have my emotions.  Especially that anger.  I think maybe I feel out of control with what's happening in my physical life and that makes me very angry and my anger gets taken out on those I love the most.  I am really trying to work on that one with God's help.  I can't do it alone.  He is my spiritual strength.  Who else would be??  I want to ALWAYS dwell in the safety of God.  I want that for you too.  Let God be your refuge and Strength.  He's waiting. Psalms 46:10a    Be still and know that I am God.....At some point during your busy, hectic day - STOP!!!  Take a time out and meditate on God and His goodness.  Sure, you may have problems, everybody does.  And yes, you may be an extremely busy person.  Are you too busy for God??  I wouldn't answer YES to that.  That would be oh so sad.  Be quiet.  Be calm.  Be still.  SSHHH!!  Isn't God wonderful.  It is so good to know that He is God and He is still in this world, waiting for us to be quiet, for just a moment, and know that He is God.  WOW! Psalms 48:1a     Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised.....God IS so wonderful.  And there is always something that God can be praised for.  Your health.  Even if your health is not so good, you're still alive aren't you.  And if you're not saved, still being alive is a good thing.  God is still giving you a chance to come to know Him.  If you're already saved and in ill health, He may want to use you to bring a smile to someone else's face.  There is always someone who could use a smile and a kind word.  God is great because He let me get out of bed this morning.  He is great because He's letting me watch the sun play on my hands as I type this blog.  He is great because I can hear Sami (my parakeet) talking with some birds outside.  He is great because I can see my sleeping daughter in her bed.  God is great just because.....You feel in that blank.  What can you praise God for this morning.  DO NOT tell me nothing!!  There is something.   Have a wonderful day in the Lord.  And remember...God can be your refuge and your strength, and He is so worthy of our praise.  Find something to praise Him for today.

Homecoming Day Grace is finally coming home from San Antonio, after being gone for five whole days.  It seems like she has been gone for a year.  I know she had a great time.  I know,  because she called me several times a day to let me know what was going on.  (Thank you sweetie.)  My biggest worry was yesterday when they went to Six-Flags.  I know how she fills about those rides and was really afraid that someone would talk her into doing something she didn't want to do.  And someone did.  But not anyone there.  That dare came from next door, from my sister, who dared her to ride the roller-coaster.  She did.  She survived.  After that I guess the day went OK.  I'm proud of her.  I'm always telling her "You've got to face your fears."  I believe that's the only way to conquer them.  Face them head-on.  Let's see.  What else has been going on.  Oh!  They spent most of the day Monday shopping.  But first, they took a trip to the Alamo.  No trip to San Antonio is complete without seeing the Alamo. Next came some shopping at the Market Square.  They ended up in a mall with five floors. And after that was a barge ride.  Sunday morning was spent at some underground caverns and then on to a water park.   She sounded exausted this morning when I talked to her.  She'll be glad to be in her own bed again.  She's already asked me if we were still having fettuccine alfredo tomorrow.  I told her we sure were.  That can be her welcome home lunch from me.  That, and a chance to sleep as late as she wants in the morning. Me?  I'm just glad to have my daughter back.

4 Generations of ladies:  My Grandmother (Edrie Weeks), my mother (Sue Marbut), me, and my daughter (Grace).  We three flower petals all live within 10 miles from the stem.  I am so glad that we all live so close to each other.  It would be ashame if Grace never got to know her grandmother (Ma) or her great-grandmother (Granny).  In fact - she knows her Grandmother very well.  We live next door to her and my dad.  That's VERY nice.  God has blessed me with the chance to always live close to my parents.  Even after I met and married my husband in Mississippi, then we all moved from Mississippi to Alabama, then from Alabama to Louisiana.  And after 11 years in Louisiana, me, Ronald, & Grace finally got the chance to move next door to mom and dad.  And it has been great these past two years living this close to them.  It took some getting used to for Grace and Jesse (our black lab) who loved being in the country, but they have adjusted very well.  Jesse and Grace get plenty of exercise here in Robeline (when we can drag her away from the a/c), and we all get to enjoy visiting with each other and the flower stem.  Besides, we are all in ministry together and it would be hard to minister as a family if some of us weren't here.  My dad is a minister and pastor and my husband is his associate pastor.  And I am the pianist for our singing group 'Grace Singers' and for my dad (been doing that for 29 years).  Before you go trying to figure my age - I'm 37 and proud of it.  God has so many more blessings in store for us and I can't wait to see what they are.  But, in order to receive those blessings, I will have to stay faithful to God and walk always in His statues.  That, I will do, until my last breath here on earth. Have a blessed and happy day in the Lord.   Currently Reading: Mysteries of the Ancient World

I finally have my own space for personal devotions.  For weeks now, I have been unhappy with the way my time with God was turning out.  I would sit at my computer and read my bible on-line and then pray.  Problems: I read better with a book in front of me, I was in a high-traffic area of the house, and, well, let's say there were to many distractions.  So I began looking for another place to have some quiet time with God.  My bedroom seemed the logical choice (it's in the back part of the house),  so I set out trying to find a chair and end-table.  (You need an end table to set your piping hot cup of tea - or coffee - on in the mornings.) That wasn't working out - room to small.  I was getting so very flustered!!!AAAWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!  Then it hit me 'like a brick'.  I have put up plant shelves in my kitchen area for indoor herbs and such - so why not a bigger shelf (12 x 32 in.) in my bedroom for me to sit at for my devotions (and have my tea at the same time).  It worked out great. I put it right in front of a window where I can look out at my newly planted flower beds.  So much for distractions, huh? Today was my first morning there and it was so tranquil and peaceful.  I read in Amos about how God can and will find you no matter where you're at and punish or save - as the case may be.  I never thought I'd find something in Amos that would pertain to me. WOW.  If God tells you to read it, don't question - just read.  He has something for you.

In other news - Grace and I have been frequenting our new coffee house in Natchitoches.  It's called  Heritage Coffee House.  The owner is such a lovely person.  If you're ever in Natchitoches, La visit her.  You'll love the company and the coffee. 

Last Friday (April 7th), Grace and I found this wonderful coffee shop on Front Street in Natchitoches.  What was so great about another coffee shop you might ask?  Well, aside from the fact that the coffee, smoothie, and cinnamon roll were delicious, the owner came to our table and sat down and chatted with us while we enjoyed our coffee. I think that was "totally awesome".  That was the NICEST thing I've seen someone do in a very long time.  She came and introduced herself and wanted our HONEST (even if it hurt) opinion on the service there and the drinks and food.  We told her what we thought (all good) and then thought she would get up and leave.  She didn't.  She told us all about her place and that she was just starting to serve sandwiches for lunch.  They sound delicious.  Made from all fresh ingredients, incuding her own herbs that I saw growing outside as we were leaving.  We really enjoyed talking with her.  She's got our business.  I have found me a new coffee shop.  Good food, good coffee/smoothies, good service, and GREAT company.  Tomorrow, we are taking my mom and younger sister there.  Hope they enjoy it as much as we do. 

Enjoy Easter and reflect on why Easter is celebrated.  Yes, He has risen.

Have you had your coffee today? 

Good morning one and all.  I can't believe I have a chance to sit down and write this morning.  Grace is taking an Algebra 2 test and Sami (our parakeet) is talking to another bird she hears in the yard.  The crickets were chirping up until Grace fed one to her tarantula, Brigette.  Now that's one way to get crickets to shush.  Threaten them with a spider feeding.  It looks like it's going to be a beautiful day.  The sun's out and so are the squirrels and birds.  Guess what??  This is so exciting!  We actually saw a hummingbird yesterday.  Guess it's time to find those feeders again.  Last year we had a hummingbird feeder hanging right at our kitchen window where Grace sits and does her school work.  Oh, it was a beautiful sight.  Hummers swarming around that feeder so very close to us.  They are so beautiful.  But so are the other species of birds we have here in the yard.  The squirrels are even cute in their play.  I have a problem eating squirrels since I see them everyday in the yard.  They do the funniest things, especially when trying to get to the bird feeders.  Isn't God so very wonderful to give us these little creatures to brighten our days.  Many times during the day, we stop and look out the windows, take pictures, and take walks outside.  I can safely say I have now taken more pictures of birds, squirrels, and flowers than all the pictures of Grace in her 15 years of life.  Sorry sweetie.  You know I love you anyway.  Trying to decide what to have for lunch.  Sandwiches are out.  We don't like them.  We usually (almost always) cook something.  This summer we will eats salads fresh from our garden we are fixing to start working on.  Just as soon as this (hopefully) last cold spell passes.

Has anyone started thinking and planning for school next year?  I haven't.  And don't plan to.  The reason being, that I have already planned for school back in December and bought all materials in February.  Now, all we have to do is finish this year's work, take a small break, and start school again.  This time with all new material.  We are just now at the half way mark with this year's schooling and wishing next year would hurry and get here.  It's hard having books sitting idle in this house without looking through them.  But that's a little 'game' we play every year.  We always order early, but promise we won't peak until about a week before we get ready to use them.  The suspense is about to drive me nuts.  There are Physics books andAdvanced Math books sitting right by me right this very minute, calling to me to just take one little peak inside.  But NO!!  Patience is key.  The way I'm going on, you'd think those books were for me.  In a way they are.  I couldn't begin to explain to you what goes on behind the covers of that physics and math book.  I can't wait to explore that area with my daughter.  Hope she lets me tag along on her journey next year.  We also have 3 subjects we are going to try on the computer this year (US History, Language Arts, Spanish [all SOS]), a world view course, and will still be working on Henle Latin I.  I know I'm getting way ahead of myself, but I'm a P-L-A-N-N-E-R.  It's just my nature.   And I love learning.  Just wish it rubbed off on every one I meet.  Oh well, as long as it rubs off on Grace, I'm HAPPY.

While I'm on here, thought I would post some pics.  My daughter and I love to play with my digital camera.  And who better to share our pictures with than homeschool family.

 We didn't take this picture.  It was sent to my dad from a friend of his.  The catfish had somehow managed to get this b-ball stuck in his mouth.  They had to deflate the ball in order to get it out.

  Good eatin!!  My husband caught this LMB.  Nothing unusual for him.  He does that alot.

  upclose of tulip

 baby tulip

  playing with photo editing software

 the reason I homeschool (She's not bored, just tired of me taking her picture everytime she moves.)

This is our version of a winter storm.  We don't get ice that often, so when we do we get all excited.  Pictures are a must for an occassion like this.  And it didn't matter how often we reminded each other to be careful going up/down the steps, a few of us still managed to slip and fall.  Not me (Thank God).  I probably would have broken something.

 icicles on church

 upclose of icicle on porch banister

  ice shape of birdbath

My daughter and I decided we would try our hands at an in-door herb garden.  In order to do that, we have to have space to put the plants.  We didn't.  But, with a little brainstorming and looking through herb books, I found this GREAT idea.  We would build window shelves for our plants.  I looked around outside for scrap lumber and found enough to make two shelves.  I needed lumber for 4 more shelves.  So I had to buy some lumber.  It didn't cost that much, thank God.  Next, I painted my shelves this beautiful spring green color and am in the process of putting them up.  We didn't really know what herbs to get, so we bought one of each kind we could find.  This way, we'll see what grows well indoors and what doesn't.  Hope we can be successful with all of them.  Here are a few pics of our shelves and plants.

The tulips were from my daughter for Valentine's Day.

I've been tagged.

Seven Awesome Movies

1.  Henry V

2.  Anne of Green Gables

3.  Anne of Avonlea

4.  Return to Green Gables

5.  Secret Garden

6.  Category 6: Day of Destruction

7.  Omega Code I & II

Seven Great Musical People

1.  My dad (Mike Marbut)

2.  My papa (Josh Marbut)

3.  My daughter (Grace Barnett)

4.  The Crabb Family

5.  The Cathedral Quartet

6.  Sandy Patti

7.  me (I wish)

Seven People I Talk To Every Day

1.  me

2.  myself

3.  I

4.  my daughter

5.  God

6.  my husband

7.  Jesse (black lab)

Seven Things I Love

1.  decaf tea with very little sugar

2.  ziti pasta with grape tomatoes and garlic salt

3.  my digital camera

4.  my bible

5.  garlic

6.  going for walks with dd and black lab

7.  breathing

Seven Things You Can Call Me

1.  Gone (who gets it?)

2.  A daughter of God

3.  Daddy's Girl

4.  A devoted Mother

5.  A Good Wife

6.  A Health Nut

7.  Loved

Seven States I Love

1.  Alabama

2.  Louisiana

3.  Alabama

4.  Alabama

5.  Alabama

6.  Alabama

7.  Did I mention ... Alabama

One of the good things about homeschooling dd was the fact that you can't get other people's sick germs if there is no one around to get those germs from.

 WRONG!!  DH still works and now he's the one bringing home those nasty cold germs.  A few weeks ago he comes home and tells me how sick the guys at work are.  I tell him to just keep his distance from them as much as possible.  He tries.  Doesn't work, though.  He eventually ends up with this bothersome cough.  He's had it for two weeks.  I love him, but have tried to keep my distance when he's at home.  Didn't work.  NOW I'M SICK!!!  Except I don't just have a cough.  I have the works.  So much for that germ theory.  Just pray that I can recover from this cold quickly.  I DO NOT like being sick.  Having complicated heart problems I can handle, but a cold??  Come on now.It's easy to handle something that's been apart of your life since you were born.  It's hard to handle something thrust on you all of a sudden.  Like a COLD.  But, I do know who to contact to help me get through and endure things.  God.  He's been everything to me for as long as I can remember.  He's the healer of ALL our diseases.  Big or small.