I awoke at 4:30 this morning to a baby needing comforting.  Once I had her back to sleep, I crawled back into bed only to hear a deep sigh escaping my husband's lips.  I could tell in the darkness that he was lying awake, obviously deep in thought.  I took his hand and asked him what was on his mind.  He shared with me his worries before him and we prayed.  He has had much to sigh about lately, though one seldom will hear it, as he is not one to complain. 

For my husband he had a big day ahead of him and a burden still hanging on from yesterday.  He learned still early in the day that someone had vandalized one of our fields that was ripe for harvest .  This was not only a great loss for us, but deeply saddened our hearts that there is someone out there with so much hatred bottled up inside.  So awakening with this still heavy on his heart, he had to face a very early start shipping out cattle.  My husband and I tend to be pretty sentimental about our animals and although this is our livlihood, it never gets any easier to let them go when it is time.

I tried, once again, to go back to sleep after we visited some, dreading how tired I might be by 10:00am if I DIDN'T get more rest.........but I just couldn't sleep, so I went to making a breakfast of cinnamon rolls for my family.  I lit the candles all around the house, thinking it would be a lovely welcome to the day for my children. 

 As the candle light danced across the darkened walls, it got me thinking on the scripture, "And her lamp does not go out by night."Proverbs 31:18b  The girls and I have been discussing Proverbs 31 alot lately.  My oldest had asked when the Proverbs 31 woman ever got to sleep if her lamp never goes out.  I came to the conclusion that she is always on call, lamp lit, ready to be there at any moment she is needed by her loved ones.  Whether it be a nursing baby, a teething toddler, a fearful five year old, a sighing husband.....she is always ready to be a servant to those gifted to her.

This is a challenging thought for me, as I know that my lamp has not always been lit, especially within.  I am sad to say, that sometimes I have but that lamp out at night and selfishly prayed I could receive some sleep for a change and then when wakened, went about the task begrudgingly.  I am finding, that those times when I lay down completely exhausted at night, that there is a certain strength in simply praying for the Lord to give me what I need throughout the night.  And then, if I awake, realizing I have slept a night through, I thank Him right away.  Why not thank Him when my sleep is little?  Thank Him for the wonderful reasons why I had a sleepless night!

I wanted to share a bit of what the Lord is working on in my life.  I am longing to be the kind of woman, the Proverbs 31 woman, who has her lamp going in her home AND in her heart.  A woman who finds delight, even in the wee hours of the night, at the opportunities to love, nurture and care for her family.  I am so thankful the Lord gave us such wonderful examples in the Bible to follow.  I feel picking apart Proverbs 31 will keep me busy for life! *SMILE*