It is a cloudy, dreary type day.  I am sitting on the window seat in the home I use to share with my family.  It is placed in a window in the bedroom my husband and I first shared when married and for many years thereafter.  I have chosen this day to go in and clean out anything my family would like to keep before the house is torn down.

  My heart is breaking as I take that step to put it all behind me.  It doesn’t take long of sitting in this place, looking out the window at old memories,  that the tears begin to fall.  I am seeing Christmases past, rain pouring on fall evenings, babies being born in the rooms below, wonderful scents from the kitchen………….but then, all of a sudden other memories began to flood into my heart and I felt as if a knife was being driven deep within…..

  The first years in this home especially, were full of much heartache.  I have written of how my marriage use to be.  I have also written of how I longed for more children, but my husband did not share my heart’s desire.  I have written of laying in a bed in the very next room, knowing life was slipping away with every breath I took.  I remember hearing my daughter crying outside my door, saying, “Grandma, Mommy is dying.”  I have memories of being a bitter, selfish person under this roof….being one key ingredient to an unhappy household. 

There were no longer tears of sadness for the good memories past falling down my cheeks.  No, it was tears of sadness for the way life was during those difficult years.  The room around me seemed so bleak, as I recalled such things.  I found myself wishing I could go back and change it all; but then the Lord opened my eyes!  HE changed it all!  I looked out the window I had looked out numerous times before in the years past….only this time I saw redemption, growth, forgiveness, JOY!  I could see our cattle grazing in the fields below and was reminded of something I read recently by Nancy Campbell....

“When God speaks of blessing, He promises increase of the fruit of the womb, but also of land and the fruit of the ground, of cattle, sheep, and fruitful vineyards. He talks about the increase of wealth, knowledge and even the increase of the years of our life. God's blessings are enlargement, fruitfulness and increase.” 

 God did this for us in different ways!  He changed our hearts, our lives and began pouring blessings out upon us in so many ways!  My husband’s heart began to change and be turned towards home.  My heart was changed and CAME back home!  Our LIVES were changed and the blessings began to flow!

 So, I dry my tears, look around the old home full of SO many different memories, and I say good bye.  Good bye to the good, beautiful memories that I know will stay in my heart forever.  And good bye to the pain of the past that go down when the home falls.  For my God is good.  He has healed.  He has increased our territory.  He has blessed.  He has proven Himself faithful.  He has restored the years the locust hath eaten!  If I kept silent about such praises in my heart, I am afraid it wouldn’t be giving God the glory He deserves….nor would others experience the reasons there are to hope!