His Abiding Love

• Dec. 22, 2007 - God's Gift to Me

God has given me a wonderful gift.  This gift is my most wonderful husband.  I met him eleven years ago last August.  I told my friend who was with me "I will marry that guy" on the way home that night.  She laughed at  me.  I sent her a wedding invitation nine months later   LOL  My husband is a wonderful gift because of many things, but I want to take the time to list them here: My husband gets up every single day at 6 am and goes to work.  It does not matter if he is sick, he goes anyway.  It does not matter that it is 20 degrees outside and he will have to work in the cold all day, he goes anyway.  It does not matter that it is 105 degrees outside and he must wear a t shirt *and* a long sleeved 100% cotton shirt, and he will work outside in the heat, he goes anyway.   He goes because he is a good man, who understands that a real man provides for his family in whatever way he can. He goes and he lets me stay at home in bed sleeping for another  two hours.   He goes because he loves us.  My husband is my most fierce protector.  He will not allow anyone, not his parents, not my parents, not friends, *no one* to speak badly of me.  He will not allow people to upset me.  When he came home from work and I was crying one day because someone said something hurtful to me and tried to bully me into doing something I did not have the means to do, he immediately called said person and ordered them to never discuss finances with me ever again.  He loves me so much, he won't allow people to treat 'his wife' badly.  OOOH, I love him!! My husband backs me up 100% in public.  He would never leave me hanging.  He always backs me up.  I can depend on that, like I can depend on the clock striking every 60 minutes.  I love that! My husband backs me up 100% with our children.  It does not matter if he totally and completely disagrees with me, he backs me up in front of them, and then goes and discusses the issue with me in private, later on.  My husband is a strong, "mr command" man.  (Read Created to be His Helpmeet by Debi Pearl to learn what that is)  He is *in charge* in our home.  I *love* that.  I know exactly what he expects 99% of the time, and how he wants it done.  This type of man is given a lot of 'bad press'.  Don't believe it.  Mr Command men love their families like nobody's business and will protect them to the death.  My husband is trustworthy.  I have no fear that he would ever cheat on me.  None.  I am not naive.  I know affairs and cheating happen frequently.  But not my husband.  He loves me too much. My husband expects me to have a brain and be able to discuss things with him.  He loves to have a good debate about the 'issues' of the day, or the government or politics or theology.  He even likes to play 'devil's advocate' to make it a good debate.  LOL  I love this!  It challenges me and keeps my brain fresh!  It is teaching our children how to disagree without being judgemental or disrespectful and how to concede to another when they've 'won' the debate. My husband loves his children and takes great pleasure in them.   He plays with them, plays music so they can dance, sings silly songs, rough houses with them, watches movies with them.  He talks to them as if they are adults and takes their thoughts and feelings into consideration.  At the same time, he is 'no nonsense' and expects obedience and respectful attitudes from them.  Now for the 'little things': He cooks, and he's *way* better than I am at it, so I love it when the weekends roll around and he wants to cook for us. He bathes the babies and they *love* it. He helps me out all the time even when he's tired. He takes care of all the yardwork because I don't like to. He takes care of all the car things because I don't like to/don't know how. He brings me sodas. He brings me chocolate. When I see him in a room, I am overwhelmed that *I* am blessed enough to be married to him!  When he looks at me I can tell how much he loves me. I love that he is blind to the fact that I don't look like I looked when we married. I love that he tells me I'm beautiful and s*xy and desirable. I love that he loves children and wants more. I love that he sees children as a wonderful blessing and can't imagine saying 'we're done'. I love that he and I agree on almost everything. I love him because he's mine. I love that he never ever complains about me to others, or says anything negative about me to anyone else.  To borrow a phrase from a movie that might sound corny, he completes me. He is the half that makes me whole.  He's the only person that 'gets' how I think, understands what I mean before I say it.  He can practically read my mind.  Is he perfect?  Nope.  He has his faults.  We have had some rough times.  Some really rough times.  But we went into our marriage with the agreement that divorce was never *ever* an option.  So we either had to work it out, or give up.  Giving up wasn't an option, so we worked it out.  He has faults and things in his life I wish he'd get rid of.  But guess what?  So do I.  I am imperfect.  I have things in my life that he wishes would change too.  I love him in spite of, and even because of sometimes, his faults.  My marriage is not perfect, but it is a glorious, wonderful marriage.  Not because we're some sort of 'super christian' couple.  We're your average Christian couple.  We have a glorious marriage because we have a little secret.  Want to know it?  It's really simple.  Die to self.  Yep, that's it.  Lose the 'me first' attitude.  Put Jesus first, Others Second, and Yourself last.  Put your spouses needs ahead of your own *all the time*.  Do not be selfish and petty.  Keep that sharp angry word back.  Bite your tongue when you want to pop off with that smart remark.   I see so many people that fight literally all. the. time. with their spouses.  It makes me sad, because the reasons that they fight are so totally obvious.  It's one reason and one only.  Every word they say to one another could be replaced with these two words "Me First".  As long as people have a 'me first' attitude, their marriage is not going to work as well as it should. Am I saying that I never have a 'me first' attitude?  Well of course not.  I am not perfect.  My husband sometimes has a 'me first' attitude too.  But I'd say 90% of the time, we put one another first.  And it works out so beautifully.  I love my husband so much, and feel so blessed by God to be chosen to be his helpmeet.  God gave me a precious wonderful gift, and I thank him for it every single day. Merry Christmas to all, Samantha

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