My oldest (son 7) has never been fallen for bribery, even as a toddler.  It didn't matter if you had a four foot tall ice cream sundae in front of him--he wouldn't bite.  At certain times, this was quite frustrating, like, for instance, when I wanted my way.  No cajoling or trickery would work though, just the art of persuasion.  Now, I suppose because of his age, he is more likely to do what we ask without an argument.

My daughter (3) is a different matter.  Usually, now she is the one that requires gentle persuasion.  She already shows signs of needing reasons to do things.  She seems to seek understanding.  Except for one area. 

I recently discovered bribery's true purpose--potty training.  After a successful training time, relapse was imminent.  Daily things went from great to horrible.  Soon, it became clear that she just could not be bothered with such things and NO persuasion was going to change that.  There was no doubt in our minds she knew how to go and could go on her own. 

I heard my husband "threaten" her one night when we were at her friend's house: "If you wet your pants, you will go home."  I cringed knowing we would be leaving any minute, but she listened and went to the potty on her own and stayed dry.  Hmmmm?  Well, that got the wheels turning and so I made my proclamation.  "No sweets or snacks if you wet your pants."

I know my husband did not make the connection between what I decided and what he had done, but behind the looks of "are you sure" he remained silent.  The first day we had immediate success.  Second day, we fluctuated.  Third day, she knew I was serious.  And now, just a week later, she has begun doing the "other" thing on the potty.  We are making progress. 

I don't enjoy bribing her.  I feel mean bribing her.  "No treat if you wet your pants."  I know her brother will be eating his treat (HE doesn't wet his pants--thank heaven), so it is hard.  But it has worked.  My profound conclusion is that girls are hard to understand--dur!! They are different--yeah.  They process things differently and are motivated by different things.  

And I figured that out all by myself! 

I believe I'm in for some interesting experiences.