One Big Family | |
Making hay while the baby sleepsI have become so fast and efficient over the years--mostly because I have had 14 babies, and I knew that I had to make the minutes count. My good ol' army training got me prepared--I often say that I went to boot camp for mothering!I'm sure you can relate. Just how much time does it take my daughters to get ready in the morning? At least an hour. How much time does it take a mommy? 15 minutes tops--am I right? The problem is that I don't want to look and smell like a drowned rat after those 15 minutes. My family members are the most important people in my life, so I want to look and smell good for them. I don't want to kiss my husband with dragon breath or squeeze my toddler close to my smelly armpit, and I don't want to speak like an angel but look like a wicked witch. Simplicity--that's the word. Simple hairdo, simple wardrobe, simple makeup and personal hygiene. I take my shower at night--this way I don't do it all in the morning. Brushing my teeth is a priority--and on this I have learned not to chintz. My hairdo is a cut that I only have to spritz and make a few curls. I have a small bag that contains the basics for makeup and deoderant. Then there is a little perfume sprayed in strategic areas. My wardrobe is simple--just a few seperates that can be mixed and matched. I prefer skirts and tops to dresses because I can usually manage to nurse discretely without covering up, so I have about 4 of these that I switch up with. I also have two tailored tapestry vests that I like to wear over different tops to help with my figure while I am still working on it after the baby. I have an occasional "sweats" day, but I am in the habit, thanks in part to the local Goodwill, of wearing nice clothes, even if I never step out of the house. After all, mothering is my "profession", and I dress, where my circumstances and budget will allow, as I would expect any other professional to dress. Along these same lines, I also spend time making sure my husband is well-dressed. His underwear is set out for him, and his shirt and pants are neatly ironed. I either iron a week's worth of clothes every Sunday afternoon or one otfit each day. He may work from home, but he always looks nice. Every other day the littlest girls are bathed, and every day their clothes are changed and they have their personal hygiene done. I am in charge of this, while the older kids are required to do the same by themselves. By 8:30 in the morning, things are usually neat and clean, including all of the bodies in the house--except for the teenage girls who need at least an hour for hair and makeup, but we're working on that one--they will have to be mommies someday and become more efficient! All a work by God's grace and in due time. Sherry Vacuum cleanersSomeone asked me about vacuums.I have to say that all I know is what I have experienced, so here goes: I definitely don't like Kirbys. They are too "klunky"--you don't have a hose that's readily available for you to use at any moment. They are too bulky for a little guy to safely carry up any sort of stairs (even difficult for any grown woman). You definitely shouldn't suck up mashed potatoes or Legos with one of these monsters, and the PRICE--OUCH! Spend a hundred bucks or so and save the rest for your college fund. We once bought a Kirby second-hand, and didn't even have stairs at the time, and it lasted about 3 months--the motor still ran but everything else just fell apart. Those Rainbow-type cannister vacs might be good for light duty if someone has alergies, etc. But then again, the price will eat you up--and if you have spaghetti noodles and pennies spilled under the bed that you such up without seeing first, you might rethink investing in something that would be the same price as a cheap car. Besides, those cannisters are a real pain to drag around and store. No, we just stick with our little Eureka's that we buy at Sam's Club--they are pretty easy to handle, have good suction for the hose, and both the filters and the cannisters can be washed--wow! If you're really worried about air quality, you might want to consider that the Hepa filters are a little pricey, but they don't need to be replaced that often. Downside--they are plastic, so you might not want to let your 7yo clunk them up and down the stairs. Ours have taken a lot of punishment, as I have already mentioned, and they are pretty easy to maintain. The jewel of a cheap vac is that, if one breaks, your heart and your wallet don't break with it. Someday we may be able to have a central vac system--I even saw pictures recently of a dear lady who has a central vac opening underneath her cabinets in her kitchen--so when the kids are tempted to sweep the crumbs under the counters, they get sucked right into the vacuum! Sherry Scrub-a-dub-dubBIG cleaning today. Things we accomplished:-Taught the children the cleaning concept "From the Inside-Out". Clean the medicine cabinet first, then the sinks and counters; clean the inner toilet first, then the outside rings, then around the base; clean the ceiling fan first, then vacuum and dust. For organizing, this means that the most used items always go on top or in the front, regardless of how it looks. If you put the little-used pain-relievers and pedicure items in the front of your bathroom cabinet because they are short, and your toothbrush and toothpaste in the back because they are tall, you will have a disheveled cabinet in no time. Put the most-used items in front, and things will stay neat for much longer. In order to make an emphasis on this for today's cleaning, I used the children as visual objects, turning them into tubes of toothpaste and deoderant and standing them in an imaginary cabinet. Much laughter accompanied our little lesson! -Cleaned under basement stairs--put baby furniture and Christmas boxes in the front per our "inside out" idea. -Cleaned basement window-wells and under the deck in preparation for winter. -Cleaned all of the ceiling fans and on top or our tall bookcases. -Completely switched the little girls' summer and winter outfits. -Organized their clothes into their drawers and hung everything according to type in my closet (we hang up almost all clothes to save on ironing later). -Put all of the luggage away from our trip. -Straightened up the boys' underwear and cleaned under their bed. -Did the same in the younger girls' room. -SCRUBBED THE VACUUMS! I don't know if anyone can relate--we have 3 vacuums, one for each floor. They are the cheap, bagless types--no super-expensive Dysons (its the plastic that keeps me from buying one--just wouldn't last any longer than the cheapos around here--we've even killed a Kirby before). We are sticklers about floors--some rooms are vacuumed 3 times a day--which is ok when you consider the amount of traffic our floors receive. Our children are children, and this means that when there are mashed potatoes underneath the dining room table, they don't take the time to clean them they way an adult would, they vacuum them up! This means that our machines can get really yucky and unhealthy. So we put the cannisters and filters in the tub and gave them all a good scrubbing--no 1-2-3 type of task! -Cleaned the front door closet--this means a ton of shoes! -Stripped the bedding and put it in for a wash--our washer has been humming all day, although we are blessed with sunshine and a nice breeze, so we used our "solar dryer" on the deck. -Super-cleaned the laundry room, or "germ room", where those 21+ loads of dirty clothes congregate, with all of the unmentionable yucky stuff attached to them. After our deep cleaning, we then took out all the trash, put out-of-place items back, and vacuumed with our restored machines--now with full suction power! Daddy rewarded the older girls by taking them to the Goodwill for a little shopping while the little ones and I took a rest. Then the little guys headed outside to the play area to set up a "movie scene" for a bucket of plastic army men in the sand. Our oldest son came home and did a science experiment with the kids--making a rocket using tin foil and matches, and then he showed them how they could make a wallet using a sheet of 8.5x11 paper. (you can find these two on the Instructables website--really worth looking into). After dinner, it will be another old movie which our daddy checks out of the library--"The Vikings" with Kirk Douglas and Tony Curtis. He is so smart to do this for us--we are being blessed with some good entertainment. Whew! I am so thankful that God helped me to get the things done on my "to do"/prayer list! What a blessing to head into the weekend with so much behind us. I even have part of my breakfast for the morning already set out! You gotta read it!I just came accross a marvelous article on the Ladies Against Feminism website. It's a declaration of the New Women's Movement. You can read it here.Secrets of family successFirst of all, let me emphasize that I do not agree that women should be combat soldiers--now that is my opinion, but it is based on many things, partly on Biblical convictions, and partly my own experience in the United States Army.With that out of the way, let me also say that I probably would not be the person I am today without the good ol' army training I received some 24 years ago. God works all things for the good, and this has become part of His plan for me. Among the things I learned that I use today are the ideas that a person can do more, faster, on less. I never knew what it meant to be "fast", or to truly clean, or how to function on less than 5 hours of sleep for weeks on end, until those fateful 8 weeks. We ran everywhere we went--we forgot how to walk. I suffered from tendonitis in my calves, but still ran, marched for miles at a time, and performed all of the other exercises and duties. I went to bed at 9 pm, woke up for 2 hours of guard duty, went back to bed, and awoke again at 4 am. I contracted bronchitis and held a fever of 102 degrees or so, but I still ran 2 miles at my greatest speed in only britches and a t-shirt in 50 degree weather. I crawled on my back through mud under barbed wire, and then had an officer command that I should wear my rain poncho so that I wouldn't "get wet". I got yelled at constantly, had to follow orders that made no sense, and still had to render respect and obedience. Does this sound familiar? Doesn't it sound like motherhood and being an obedient Christian and wife? There are many things I use from those days even now: 1: I can still be thankful, even without a full 8 hours of sleep, even with pregnancy sleeplessness and newborn interruptions. 2: People (my children) will conform if they have to, it just takes firm, confident leadership and the willingness to take the measures necessary. The army trains soldiers for combat, and combat is a life-or-death situation. You can't allow yourself to constantly be second-guessed when lives are on the line. You can't take little "half-measures" either--you have to be firm and go on the offensive with behavior problems. It is unwise to wait until the problem escalates and then take action--set the standard up front and then make sure the consequences are painful (not necessarily in the physical sense) and meaningful from the outset, instead of waiting until you get mad enough to do something about it. 3: Teamwork and commaraderie are vital to the success of any mission. Even though I had very little in common with the other women in my platoon, I found myself crying, praying and cheering them all on. You can't have a functioning, happy family without being a team; without being each other's greatest cheer-leaders. You have to get rid of things like competition and petty jealousy, and practice handing out praise in large doses. You have to have an objective before you, and realize that all else is secondary (in this case growing in Christ's love). You have to clap and whoop and holler over the accomplishments of your spouse and your children. 4: The "buddy system" works. I had a buddy, and we looked out for each other. Around here we have buddies, albeit not in a formal, assigned sense, and they watch out for each other and care for each other. This is not to say that we leave the parenting to the children, but we allow the sisterhood and brotherhood that God planned to take its proper place. 5: The job gets done better and faster if you get everyone involved. If you have a large brood, get them all to help when it's time to clean up or do other chores. Make it a party--plan some celebration afterwards. 6: Idle hands make mischief. In the army, if there wasn't anything happening, they found jobs for you to do--even if it meant painting tree trunks and rocks. It didn't matter what sort of "special training" you had, the army had its way of finding menial things for you to do, right along-side the higher ranking sorts. We picked up cigarette butts, raked leaves, painted curbs, polished doorknobs, etc. Children do need time to just "mess around", but if things get out of hand, I hand them a broom or a bucket and give them things to do. 7: Always salute the officers and great the sergeants. Do we want to raise respectful, honoring children? Then we have to become the same, and then expect the same. Children don't necessarily want to operate with honor--they must be trained to respond with respect and even given the words to say. Honor is something that must be addressed directly, since it goes against the grain of our flesh, and honoring begins with honoring older brothers and sisters. 8: Never leave a man (woman) behind. If someone was lagging behind on a 10-mile march, another soldier was assigned to carry her pack so that her burden would be lighter, and a few other soldiers got on either side and lifted her up. If you are a team, you carry each other's burdens and lighten each other's loads. You don't make fun of the weak or the downtrodden, you lift them up. Everyone finishes victoriously together. This is the balance to expecting more than a person thinks he/she can do. It deals with compassion and self-sacrifice for the good of the mission and the team. 9: Meetings and announcements keep the team focused. Taking the time to assemble the family and address issues of concern or praise is a vital practice. You need to cast a vision of the goals of your team and make sure that everyone is on the "same page" as it were. Just as there is a "place for everything and everything in its place", each family member needs to know their function and what is expected. Leaving these things to chance only leads to chaos and feelings of isolation and frustration. 10: Showing a little passion now and then lends credibility and gives the team the vision it needs to get through the rough times. Whether it's positive or negative passion, the children need to see that the parents are seriously involved, that they are engaged on both a logical and emotional level. It is unwise to be constantly cheerful or angry--but use emotional responses when they will serve the greater good, always balanced with self-control. 11: Organization and planning keep the team on track. Any organization that does its job well has procedures that must be followed for different scenarios. There are rules that must be followed which keep things from being fowled-up due to knee-jerk, emotional responses. Even when cleaning a bathroom, it is good to have what is referred to as an "SOP", or "Standard Operating Procedure" manual, which gives the person a specified list of what is expected. These are some of the obvious things that have become part of our daily lives here--I'm sure there are more that I don't readily recognize. Especially when a family is large, you can't just live and expect things to "fall in place". You need a plan of action, or you will end up with a handful of nothingness, like sand through your fingers. Special breakfast--banana splitsSometimes we get a little tired of eggs or oatmeal--so I love to throw in something different!Breakfast Banana Splits Ripe bananas Flavored yogurt Toasted sliced almonds Whipped cream (optional) Split or cut up banana in bottom of bowl. Add generous dollup of yogurt. If desired, plop some whipped cream on top (in a pinch, I whip up some dry coffee creamer--2 parts creamer to 1 part cold milk, with sugar and vanilla to taste). Sprinkle on toasted, sliced almonds (put almonds on a pand in the oven and toast until golden). Yummy! We also like to add a half bagel or so on the side, just to make it more filling. Apron strings......that's what I have tied around my waste most of the time!  Why aprons? Because they are just so useful! 1) I love to dress "pretty" even at home, and although I might wear mostly Goodwill clothes, I also don't want to wear them out or stain them prematurely, so I wear an apron to keep them clean and protect them. That way, if I have to run out to the store, or someone comes to visit, I can simply take off my apron and, voila!, I am clean, fresh and presentable, especially after a mad bout of baking or cleaning. 2) They have pockets! What are pockets good for? They carry all sorts of things, like a pen and "pocket mod" or other small piece of paper to jot down ideas or reminders that flash into your mind when you are vacuuming or wiping down a mirror and don't want to have to find a pen and pad somewhere else. I keep kleenex for wiping little noses, rubber bands for all sorts of uses, sometimes even a brush. I also have one of those handy little "all-in-one" tools, with pliers, screw-drivers, etc. so I can fix things around the house as I go. When I am expecting a call, I can pop my cordless phone in there so that I don't miss it. 3) They have pockets! (this is not redundant by accident)--when you go around the house and find little things like barretts and legos, you can just pop them in the pocket--then, as you find yourself in the room where they go, you just replace them. Some aprons are totally utilitarian, like the type you can find in packages of 3's that are meant for the service business, and these are great for everyday (mine even have paint stains). But there are other types as well. Some of the neatest aprons are the ones that waiters and waitresses use, the ones that are very short but have lots of pockets. I have found these at thrift stores. The only drawback is that they do not cover as much, so they are not as useful for messy things. Another type is the "vest"--my daughter worked at a drugstore and gave two of these to me when she quit. I really love these--they button down the front, are fitted for a nice look (remember, I like to look pretty), and have two huge pockets on the side. These also are not suited for messy jobs, but they are great for homeschooling, as I have even been able to keep a small stapler and wipe-off markers in these pockets. Then there are the pretty, feminine-type, the type that we envision the homemakers of old to wear. I have two of these so far, but I am looking to gain more. One is a gorgeous floral that has been quilted and has a scalloped hem, and one is denim, of a simple design, onto which I have embroidered all of the names of my children. I have seen patterns of different-types of aprons, and I look forward to adding these to my collection soon. Since I have 9 girls (so far), I hope to resurrect the habit of wearing aprons, which is both useful and very feminine, especially for any "professional mommy". WFMWToday's entry concerns laundry.We do about 15-20 loads a week. Here's how it goes: We bought a front-loader--washes more, uses less electricity and water, rings the clothes dryer so that drying time is less--my clothes dry in the same time it takes to run a washer load! I do not keep dirty laundry in rooms--it is brought down to our "pre-sort" system during morning cleanup Pre-sort--I have 4 baskets; one for colors, one for darks, one for white kitchen rags, and one for other white laundry--this way all we have to do is reach into a basket and grab a load when it's time to switch. The laundry is switched on the average of 3 times a day, which keeps it from stacking up. Dirty laundry is pre-sorted, and clean laundry is sorted and put away during morning cleanup. It also helps that we have an appliance maintenance agreement with our local utility company that covers our laundry work-horses, so if they need repair, there are no worries, and they do need repair every-so-often! Although many will not have the "load" I do, some of my method may help. Sherry My dayCandy, over at Keeping the Home has asked if we will post a "to do" list. Well, I haven't been able to post the list before the day happens, so here's an "already done" list.6:00 wake up, prayer --draw bath --wake kids up --cuddle hubby --yoga stretches 15-20 min.(just the ones with Priscilla on PBS--no mystical junk there--when you are 42 and preggo, you need some limbering up!) --put away laundry from previous day --iron clothes and lay them out for hubby and me --check on kids and their morning chores --bathe, put on make up, do hair --make bed --check on kids --finish up brochure for hubby --eat breakfast --wash up and fix hair of little girls, make sure they have clean clothes --get the boys in the bath (we alternate with the younger boys and the little girls) --clean dining room and wash dishes after Grace made blueberry pancakes (yummy but messy, and we are short-handed with Timothy off on a boy scout trip) --check on progress of kids on other chores --Head downstairs (where we have a playroom, craft area, etc.) for concentrated learning time --20 minutes reading aloud "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" to everyone (with Faith able to sit on my lap or play) --older girls go to prepare for their job (normally doing "life lab" work) --read aloud from Bible in Genesis, the story of Joseph leading up to Moses, which will work in nicely with our study of "buggies" --copy off "scientific sketch" sheets with lines under a box for a sketch (from http://highland.hitcho.com.au/Forms.htm) --set up today's copy work--2Cor. 5:17--talking about "metamorphosis" as it relates to our new life in Christ and comparing it to the transformation that happens when a caterpillar changes into a butterfly --find a page in our insect book to illustrate the caterpillar to butterfly, and use it to sketch, after everyone has copied the verse from the white board (this was spurred on by the capturing of a beautiful caterpillar that we have "jarred" and are awaiting when it will make it's crysalis and turn into something that flies) --after completion of sketch sheet, everyone cleans the basement and finds shoes in preparation for a walk to the nature park while I journal about our lessons for the day --we sit and wait on the porch and enjoy an apple for a snack while exploring about birds and electricity with a teacher's edition of an Abeka science book --walk to nature park, explore the flora and fauna, get really hot and tired, head home --Nikki has sandwiches and chips waiting for us--we eat and discuss our day --switch laundry --I leave the kitchen to the children, with older sister Anna in charge --I head upstairs for some lunch cuddles with hubby --30 minutes private devotional reading, nap--all of the kids either napping or in quiet time --up and preparing dinner--noodles stroganoff, corn, chocolate cake (while talking to oldest daughter on phone who lives two states away about my grandbaby, etc.) --leave the finishing to Nikki, take off to bank and pick up daughter at work with hubby --stop at library to pick up some Jimmy Stewart movies --home to direct dinner, bring dinner up to hubby, eat dinner with kids--the older ones discuss ways they had concocted to get out of eating dinner when they were little--we all have a good laugh --dinner cleanup--my oldest son (21) lines all of the little kids up and acts like a drill sargent to get them going--they all know he's too good natured to take him too seriously, so it is interesting to watch them all: --clear, wash, polish dining room table and benches --vacuum main floor --sweep kitchen --fill dishwasher --wash other dishes --clean counters and cupboard fronts --scrub all appliances, in and out (micro, fridge, stove) --take out trash --I put the 3 little girls in the bath--2 of them were playing in the grass and were itchy --they go upstairs where Daddy directs their dressing --switch laundry --scrub a stubborn pan while oldest son tells me about his day and his ideas--little kids are done with their jobs and head downstairs, the oldest girls are already getting ready for bed--it's been a long, exhausting day for them --Daddy comes downstairs and fools around, getting ready to watch one of our Jimmy Stewart movies --Everyone sits down to watch movie, while I sit with my laptop and do a little blogging (we have a huge sectional that can seat almost all of us comfortably) --clean up family room, brush teeth, bed |
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