ANNOUNCEMENTS

We begin  this  meeting  with  an  announcement  of  great  importance as  it  concerns  the  contributions which  are  placed  in  the  local paper.  Namely,  from this meeting onward,  all contributions are preferred to be  typewritten and printed  with the illustrious printer.  Thank you for your consideration and to A.H for donating her time and energy for this project. 

-                                                   The Editor

EVENT OF THE WEEK

          A sad catastrophe

A few days ago we came up stairs to find our beloved T. S. bleeding in the nose.  Fearing that it was broken we were preparing to head to the hospital but to our relief, the immense swelling soon subsided and we were given the privilege of remaining at home. There is a heavy bruise but now the cut is much better.

EDITOR’S HELPFUL HINTS                   

Will P.L.P. refrain from scaring people with outrageous ideas of dyed hair etc?   

        Will C.V. please brush his hair in the morning?

Will R.C. please refrain from putting her hands into the food she is preparing for the masses?

DID YOU KNOW?

Did you know that Islam is the fastest growing religion in Europe?

Did you know that the Ottoman Empire once included all of North Africa, South East Europe and the Middle East?

Did you know that when the Ottoman Empire collapsed, 26 different nations came out of it?

Did you know that Paxton Lucus Pembroke's score of 40 in the British pasttime of snatch set is the Middle Eastern record for the sport and that he is likely to be included in its Hall of Fame?

FEATURE STORY

   The Mystery of the Stolen Safe  by C.V

Chapter 1 

A lot of other things happened around this time but I can`t tell you all of them or they would never fit into this book.  So I`m not telling you all the details but it is hard not to say the other events that happened when they were exciting as well but as I said they would never fit into this book so I`m going to have to just tell you the main events that happened. 

First of all I`m gonna, I just remembered my dad told me yesterday that its not decent to use the word `gonna`, which is short for `going to` and some boys use it even when they have been told that its not a word.

Anyway, first I`m gonna introduce you to the gang.  The gang beginning with Big Jim, our leader mostly `cause he is the oldest. He`s also a swell fighter, which reminds me of the day we captured the robber, and Big Jim had to fight him and hurt his knuckles really bad in doing it on that robbers jaw.  That fight happened by Sugar Creek and the robber had the money and – but I need to tell you this story not the other one. 

My best friend is Poetry.  We all call him that because everything reminds him of one or other his never ending, a hundred and one poems that he has memorized or made up himself much to the disgust of Circus, our acrobat who is always climbing trees when he is not doing cartwheels on the grass or some other acrobatic stunt.

Dragonfly is the name that we have given to Roy Gilbert, who is always seeing everything first that sometimes aren’t really there.   Dragonfly is the only one in our gang whose mother is superstitious which means that she believes things like if a black cat walks across the road in front of you it means bad luck, or if you find a horse shoe and hang it up over your door it means good luck and things that. 

Little Jim is the youngest member of our gang, and the best Christian  the world; or at least the best one in our gang. Also he was the one who killed that big, angry mother bear after we fought with the town gang of boys in the Battle of Bumblebee hill which Tom Till the latest member of our gang gave me a black eye.  Then later he left the gang of swearing town boys and is part of our gang.

Well, now I guess there’s no one left but me; I’m just plain Bill Collins which is short for William Jasper Collins which is a name that I don’t like and only my dad calls me that when I have done something I shouldn’t have which isn’t that rare.  And I have got the cutest little baby sister that a boy could ever want and the best parents in  the world.

I’ll tell you about the mystery in the next chapter which I’ll be writing just as soon as I can.

QUOTE CORNER

“Thank goodness I was never sent to school; it would have rubbed off some of the originality.”       -Beatrix Potter

“A child should have mud pies, grasshoppers, water bugs, tadpoles, frogs, mud turtles, elderberries, wild strawberries, acorns, chestnuts, trees to climb, animals to pet, hay fields, pine cones, rocks to roll, sand, snakes, huckleberries and hornets - and any child who has been deprived of these has been deprived of the best part of his or her education.”     -Luther Burbank

Contributed by the humble A.H

SPECIAL FEATURES

We are privileged this evening to have one of our own society members give an impromptu ‘teaser’ for the well-known and worthy classic Oliver Twist.  So sit back and enjoy…