"I was drunk when I thought that we should date. Now im sober and ink does not erase. You don’t owe me a **** thing. Call me up but I cut off all the strings. Cause Im done with living hours that feel like days."

   Hmmm, I’m not even sure if anyone reads this blog anymore, but for those who…you probably have noticed the sorry lack of posts lately. I apologize…but really, I have a good excuse. My life has been extremely crazy with college, homework, and work, and when I DO find time to actually sit down at the computer and write, I tend to write for my other blog—which is less of a newsy one and more of just my thoughts and wonderful things like that. :)

That being said, I’m completely switching to blogger now. I’ve enjoyed getting to know some of you and hopefully you’ll continue to read my writings! This blog will probably stay up for a little while longer.

My new blog address is http://www.dancingrebekah.blogspot.com/.

Once upon a time — in what we might think of as the “Happy Days” era — courtship was governed by a set of guardrails. Potential partners generally met within the context of larger social institutions: neighborhoods, schools, workplaces and families. There were certain accepted social scripts. The purpose of these scripts — dating, going steady, delaying sex — was to guide young people on the path from short-term desire to long-term commitment.

Over the past few decades, these social scripts became obsolete. They didn’t fit the post-feminist era. So the search was on for more enlightened courtship rules. You would expect a dynamic society to come up with appropriate scripts. But technology has made this extremely difficult. Etiquette is all about obstacles and restraint. But technology, especially cellphone and texting technology, dissolves obstacles. Suitors now contact each other in an instantaneous, frictionless sphere separated from larger social institutions and commitments.

Home Economics...a class I never took in high school because I was in band...was part and parcel for young ladies in high school once upon a time.  Girls were taught how to cook meals, sew clothing, do laundry, etc.  Nowadays, few girls in the public school system receive such training.  If they do take what we might call "Home Ec" classes, they're more likely to be referred to by different names, such as "Applied Science: Foods," or "Consumer Education." 

A quick glance at the course catalog of my own local public high school shows such courses as, "Interior Design," "Fashion Merchandising," "Culinary Arts and Nutrition," "Food Science," "Child Development," "Parenting," "Adult Living/Personal Relationships."  ALL course descriptions provide the way that these courses will relate to a future college-major/course of study. 

A few years ago, my niece and her then-boyfriend (now husband) joined our family for Thanksgiving dinner.  I invited her to join me in the kitchen to help with some of the last minute tasks...I figured I would let her "show off" a little to this young man by showcasing her skill in the kitchen!  I realize that this is a VERY old-fashioned way of thinking...and this side of the family does not know Christ, does not value home-education, nor the "training up" of children for any purpose other than attending college so as to get the best possible job and make money so they can have a "good life."  Even so, I knew that men enjoy a good meal, and I was determined to set up a scenario where this potential husband-to-be would be impressed! 

 "Sweetie, come help your old aunt with dinner...can you make the mashed potatoes tonight?"  "Sure, I guess.  I've never made them before...what do I do?"  "Well, the potatoes are all in that big bowl...they're all washed, so just peel them, quarter them, and put them in that big pot of boiling water to cook."  "OK, how do I peel them?"  "The vegetable peeler is right there, see?"  "OK, I see it, but how do I peel them?"  "How do you peel them?  I'm sorry, do you prefer a paring knife to peel your potatoes?"  "A what-knife?"  "Sweetie, what do you like to use to peel a potato?"  "I don't know...I've never peeled a potato.  I don't know how." 

I showed her how to use a vegetable peeler and a knife on a potato; she chose the vegetable peeler, and began to work, slowly.  Her mother joined in to help speed things along, as did I, with my paring knife.  Once the potatoes were boiled, the two continued the impromptu cooking lesson, mother teaching daughter the art of adding milk, butter, salt, and pepper to get the perfect consistency.  Together, they hunted down and removed all the lumps left in the creamy masterpiece...a tragedy, in my opinion. My daddy always told us, "if there aren't any lumps in it you don't know they're real potatoes...the best made-from-scratch mashed potatoes ALWAYS have lumps, they're no good without the lumps!"

I pulled my niece aside and quietly told her, "you know, the lumps are OK...you don't always have to remove all the lumps!"  She surprised me by immediately going back over to her mom, and saying, "I'll take out the lumps...I am her daughter!"  "Good for you," I thought!  "And good for you, Mom...you taught her how to peel a potato and make edible food from it!"  Better late than never.  This was a 21 year old who considered putting a box of icy stuff in the microwave to be "cooking." 

The point of this isn't really to debate the best way to prepare mashed potatoes for Thanksgiving (that'll be next week's article).  Nor is it to criticize anyone who puts a frozen box of pasta in the microwave and calls it "cooking dinner," for I have done it myself on more than one occasion!  

What I desire to share is something most homeschool parents already realize, and that is the alarming inability, due to the simple lack of any training, of the average young adult in this country to manage a home in a healthy, financially responsible, and balanced manner.  Our young men and women are largely being "trained" for college entrance and career.  Within the homeschool community, I realize that there are widely varying opinions on the issue of career-women vs. home-keepers.  Therefore, I will not be going there!  Whichever side of that fence you fall on, I believe we can all agree that if our young people are blessed to enter into marriage and family, they will save themselves boatloads of emotional angst if both of them know how to: prepare food at home from scratch; buy just what they can afford and truly need rather than be attracted and drawn to excessive home decor that can only be purchased with credit and debt; sew simple articles of clothing rather than having to purchase everything at the store; repair fixable broken items rather than replacing them; give regularly to the work of the church and save some of their income on a regular basis rather than spending every penny that comes in on "wants" -- as opposed to needs.  

This is the "art" and "science" of home economics.  Parents of homeschooling high school students...I would beg you, do not ignore this most important area of "study," even if one or more of your students is a college-bound guy, as is one of mine.  Curricula abound out there, if you desire this, or you can simply bring them alongside you when you cook dinner, make a sandwich, do the laundry, scrub down a bathtub, or clean a toilet.  

Inge Cannon of Education Plus has a wonderful recommendation in her "Transcript Bootcamp" program...she says to give your teenage children a copy of their "Emancipation Proclamation."  This is a list of life-skills which you create that are required of your young people before you will issue them their high school diploma...no matter how many course credits they've earned! Whether or not you create a home-economics course out of the accomplishment of this list is up to you.  Either way, what a wonderful gift of learning and life we impart if we put this idea into practice!  

A couple of weeks ago, I introduced one of my favorite books by Edith Schaeffer to you.  This week I'd like to introduce another one: The Hidden Art of Homemaking.   As with the other book, Mrs. Schaeffer's writing can be a bit dificult to "get into" at first because of stylistic choices she makes, but the content is so wonderful, it's worth the time and little bit of effort! 

In closing, let's share a few verses from God's word which can focus our children's studies and practices in the area of home economics:

Proverbs 31:27  "She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness."

I Timothy 6:6-10  "But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and raiment let us be therewith content. But they that will be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows."

I Timothy 6:17-19  "Charge them that are rich in this world, that they be not highminded, nor trust in uncertain riches, but in the living God, who giveth us richly all things to enjoy; that they do good, that they be rich in good works, ready to distribute, willing to communicate; laying up in store for themselves a good foundation against the time to come, that they may lay hold on eternal life."

I Peter 3:7  "Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered."

I Thessalonians 4:11-12  "And that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you; that ye may walk honestly toward them that are without, and that ye may have lack of nothing."

May God bless you and your homeschool this week!

Lori

Lori Havens has been married to Kevin for 24 years.  They live in Illinois with their two sons, Bryan (17) and Nathan (16), and dog Sunny (9).  Lori enjoys writing, gardening, reading, and the outdoors.  She is the author of "Should I Be A Nurse? A Journey of Self-Exploration for Those Considering a Career in Nursing" and  "7 Essential Questions Every Future Nurse Must Ask."     You can find her blogging at both Homeschool Blogger and Homestead Blogger  .