Walking Therein

A Personal Story - Homeschool Them! They ARE Always Vulnerable - Even If Homeschooled. Don't Take the Chance!

   We have been having some pretty good discussions... and very amicable, I might add, about  sending children to public school or Homeschooling.

   Mrs.Diamond has been faithful to leave a few comments, and I cannot speak to them in short answers, so I am going to let you all in on it.

   It is a matter of faith that I am putting such a personal, still painful bit of our lives here on this blog for you all to read (with dd's permission) - AND, it will benefit someone. Even one person would make it worth it. The LORD God is a faithful God.

   As far as the idea that being blessed or blessing others in an 'ungodly' situation goes: of course He will bless you where you are, even if you are only in His good will, and not His perfect will for your life. HE loves you! He will never leave you. I do not doubt that Christians in the ps can witness, can touch lives... but, are they being spiritually-stunted because that is not God's absolute best for their lives?

If God stopped blessing us because we were disobedient, America would have stopped being blessed years ago.

Parents can still volunteer or befriend a teacher at the local ps. Why not? But, the parents should be the catalyst for witnessing, not the children.

So, here is my story - to answer Mrs. Diamond's Comments:

I will say one thing, though, because I do disagree...

   You cannot wash one little piggy bright as a shiney new penny and send them into the pigpen, hoping their nice shininess will rub off onto the dirty piggies. It does not happen, any more than you can send a child to school and not have repercussions from the sinful habits of others they are deluged with for 8 hours.And, you cannot expect to be there for everthing for them. You cannot possibly know all that happens to them- or in front of them - their little eyes, their little ears - in a Public School all day - or anywhere else, for that matter.

   Good teacher or not, it only takes one time for Susie to be molested or Johnny to get an interest in the Ouija board or be desensitized to the Muslim beliefs. It may not show up now, but it will show up later, somewhere. Then, because of our mistaken choices as parents, they will have to deal with what we can put an end to now.

   How do I know this? Because last summer, we discovered that one of our dd's had a secret email address which she used to email mostly her "male friends." When I found it - led by God(but, after I did not heed all other warning signs and urgings), she was ready to leave home. She made phone calls to do just that and even left very early one morning, only to return by the grace of God. We are STILL dealing with repercussions of that 1 year later. She has to daily suffer, because I wanted her to have friends at Awana. I felt bad that she couldn't "socialize" and have those friends.

   Now, almost a year later, we still struggle with sinful attitudes about respect, modesty, worldly ideals, material possessions, the true calling of a Biblical woman, and a superior attitude towards each member of our family. All of this, because I felt like sending her to be a leader at a local church at 15 was a good idea. Those boys are not bad kids. They are from today's Christian families. However, those Christian parents are leading their children in a different direction than the Biblical model we want for our children.

   In addition, 2 of the boys we knew and interacted with- the Pastor's son - a Christian young man, agreed to keep this email a secret, and another boy,who told her that he was proud of her that she quit being such a straight arrow and decided to rebel against her parents. I read this in absolute horror. The fact that both of these boys attended a prominent area christian school system, proves that you can NEVER know all of the influences your child will come up against and the choices they have to make. I regret that I was not there to help her make those decisions, because, in my sin, against my better judgment, I put her in those positions.

   Children are vulnerable, because they do not understand what is truly good. My daughter thought these young men were her friends, but they did not act in a manner of a true friend. They allowed her to put herself in dangerous positions. She even went to a "Christian chatroom" -at a family member's house, nonetheless, when we let her stay there to help out. They decided not to tell us, because that would get her into trouble.... see a pattern, here? No one seems to know what it is to make a right choice. I made a choice based on feelings and it just went downhill.

   Now, she will deal with those footholds for some time, until we can overcome them together. IT IS NOT WORTH the friends and socializing and being like the world. No, IT IS NOT AT ALL. Even with good teachers.

   And, by the way: Patience Schmatience. Of course I am going to be impatient...everyone is at times. It is part of maturing in the LORD and WITH our children. I have heard that reason for not homeschooling so many times. It is (sorry, for lack of a better word) lame. If God told you that you HAD to  homeschoole your child/ren, what would you do? (Which I feel He has already made clear in Scripture.) Who would ever say, "But, God, I am impatient."?  Sounds like Moses. 

   These are my children.  How can I expect a paycheck to make a teacher more patient with my children than I can be? I love them more, and I hope they would never think otherwise.

Related Tags:  Homeschooling, Homeschool, Home School, Public Schools,  Parenting, Biblical Parenting, Family, Biblical Family, Blog,  Homeschool Blogs, Dr. Tony Beam, Southern Baptist Convention, Dr.BruceShortt, Deuteronomy 6  

On the other hand... it is safe to let your children blog here at Homeschoolblogger. As a matter of fact, if you have a budding author, it is an excellent CLASSTIME to assign them to write a blog - or, as we called it in my day, a writing assignment or research paper...  ( ;

I said all that, just to say - 2dd15 commented on this post; then she linked it, so, I want to give you hers on What's a Nubian? Goat-education.  Just my hard-earned homeschoooling hours at work...  YAY!!!

Untitled Comment

4:37 PM, Monday, May 29, 2006 .. Posted by Titus2woman

*THANK YOU!* for sharing, and (((((HUGS)))) to your daughter for letting you! (((((HUGS))))) sandi

Uh-huh, I get it!!!!

6:37 PM, Monday, May 29, 2006 .. Posted by Jocelyndixon

Thank you so much for homeschooling me when you could send me to PS. I wouldn't last a day there...probably because I would go crazy with all the PS system's ideas that go against the Bible. I much rather be at home learning about Goats, I mean what child that goes to PS gets to learn about goats during the day the way I do?

It's hard not to voice your opinion, but some one has to let the light out and God has called us to do it as christains and believers. We need to pull our kids out of PS and start making a real difference by teaching them "black is black and white is white.Hell is hot and sin ain't right"

Good post, I give you an A+....hehehehehe

Love,
Myrtle

:)

11:04 PM, Monday, May 29, 2006 .. Posted by mrsdiamond

Well this is your blog and a "homeschooling" blog at that, so I totally want to respect your opinions and views. I have nothing against homeschooling, and may end up doing it yet. Who knows.

But I do think it is pretty harsh to say that sending a child to public school is a SIN. I don't think it's as black and white as all that.

Even in homeschooling situations, things can happen. You can't be with your kid 24/7 until they're 18 years old! You can't shelter them until they're 18 and then suddenly release them to the world! They have to learn to stand up on their own two feet and you give them that freedom very gradually of course........and they have to learn to make good choices. At 15 I think it was very reasonable to allow your daughter to attend Awana on her own without you. She made a wrong choice. That's not your fault. That's not Awana's fault. You can't even blame other kids.... That was her choice. That's part of being a teenager. She needs to learn to stand up against peer pressure whether christian kids or not. And just because she made a wrong choice doesn't mean it's all over. She can learn and grow from that. That is part of life too....

I think we'll have to agree to disagree on this one sis. I am not sinning by sending my kids to public or private school.

God bless. (hugs)

Hey Missy

2:16 AM, Tuesday, May 30, 2006 .. Posted by KK30514

I read your blog each day and I enjoy it. Sometimes I feel that I have struggled with some of the things your child did (when I was younger). I was on my own at 16 and I had a horrible addiction to the internet and the worst of places you can go. I had secret email addresses myself. I finally met the right man in the "real world" not on the internet (thank you God). So I know what it's like to hide email, chat behind my family, etc. Now I'm 26 and grown with my own child (he's only 7). I am glad to have found homeschoolblogger so early, and such a wonderful support group such as yourself and those here. I'm only having a problem with a couple of things the DS DH DD's and more. I'm "assuming" that this is Dear Daughter or Dear Son or whatnot? And who are 1dd15 or 2dd16 etc? Is this 1st Daughter age 15, or am I on the wrong track? =)

Thank you for sharing, and please forgive yourself as GOD HAS! Sharing your story helps those like myself who have a child that is going to be old enough to get into stuff in the near years! P.S. I like your picture you put on your homepage, you are so pretty. God has blessed you all!

Kimberly

The black and white of it.

9:19 AM, Tuesday, May 30, 2006 .. Posted by Canadagirl

Hi, I am so glad God led you to my blog. I am in total cink ( I don't know how to spell this, hehe) with you. I have a ds(almost 14) and he made a big bad choise. We are now working threw all the after math of it for 18 months now and it will be till Feb. till it's all worked out. I was brought to tears what your dd commented. It shows where her heart is and is still soft to the Lord. I do really think if you send your kids to public school you are almost playing russian rullet. I don't want to take that chance, I rather raise them in the ways that they should go and build lots of heart ties. I don't want him to have heart ties to others or other things. My ds also still has a soft heart to the Lord and he will work things out over time. God bless and lets get to know each other . I need some else who is working it threw with the young adult (aka -teens) scene. ;)
God bless your day.
In Him,
-Canadagirl

In response TO, but not necessarily directed AT: my dear HSB friend, Mrs.D-

12:21 PM, Tuesday, May 30, 2006 .. Posted by JacqueDixonSoulRestES

For clarification, we have 3 older dd's, so I will keep her anonymous, unless SHE spills that it was her!
**Ok, the issue here, is this: God has shown me personally, as a Christian and as a Mother, that His ways are higher.Therefore, I must strive for that higher calling. I am called to fulfill the Titus2 Woman. In 15 years of being a Christian and attending at least 5 different churches (we moved about a dozen times), I had never heard that before. Sad. So sad, in fact, that I have to tell others. I cannot get back the "years the locusts ate.", but, I can (try my best to) live as a Biblical woman - which is different than a defined Christian woman in today's society. I can also know that God can make all things new, knowing that it does not take away the consequences from past sin.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"it is a bad parental choice to put my vulnerable children into positions (with other 'teens' or little adult supervision) where the consequences are so grave."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
**I disagree that it was dd(dear daughter)'s fault and not mine. Yes, she made the wrong choice, and yes, she is partly to blame. She knows this, too. However, as a Titus2 Mother, I should have been training her to be a leader here. We have 6 other children; she did not need to be down there with little supervision from the 'Christian adults' leading other women's children. Even if that were not the case, it is a bad parental choice to put my vulnerable children into positions (with other "teens" or little adult supervision) where the consequences are so grave. I wasn't putting her in the position to choose a color of skirt she disliked and would have to wear anyway. Yes, she does need to learn to stand up to peer pressure; but I have to teach her that, as she goes along. I cannot teach her if I don't know about the pp.
(Thank you; I have forgiven myself and am just trying to listen better to My Father! )
**And, as a note: I am NOT blaming the other children. I don't know how you would teach your child/ren, but, when my child misses an opportunity to lead a friend in the direction of righteousness, it is sin. If they lead them into the direction of sin- well, it is sin. (I know the boys, and) At 15, those boys knew that, and either had alterior motives or didn't care or didn't have the spiritual fortitude to tell her that. That does not make it their fault she did it, but they did not discourage her, and the one encouraged her. It was her fault she considered them friends and ours as parents that we let them be her friends.
**I searched my posts and cannot find where I said it is sin to put your child/ren into a school situation. For our family, with what we read in the Bible, it is sin. We cannot offer them up to Molech because of all the social reasons I have heard so many times.
**As far as black and white: I do think life is black and white. Does this mean the Bible is not Black and White? I think it is. I think sin is sin, and should not be called a social disorder or a bad attitude or a wrong choice. When we start calling sin sin, our children and the society we are trying to witness to will see God and Jesus for who they are. They will quit calling Jesus a good teacher and get it that He is the Son. Our lives will mean something, and we won't be a bunch of hypocrites. PLEASE! I am not calling anyone a hypocrite! I am saying this as a general observation - if God convicts you of this, thank him and repent, don't hold it to me!
**The pss in America is a haven of sin. Bottom line. It is like Sodom and Gomorrah. Would you take your children to live in S&G? And, before you object to that comparison with the fact that there are more than 10 righteous there - the only reason that is is because Christian parents put their children there, not because they live there. The pss has been a sin-haven for years and we continue to yoke our precious children to those in said system and church situations and friendship circles and other teams and groups. Shame on us as parents.
**As far as "sheltering them": My children are not sheltered - unless you mean we won't let them watch rated-R movies or those that have crude humor, disrespectful kids, teen promiscuity, drugs, etc. or go places with friends that are "typical teens" -cell phone, car, boyfriend, job, revealing clothing, etc. TV time is maybe 1-2 times a week, and we pretty much mute commercials or change it to the blue screen. I would be happy with no tv.
**And, letting them go at 18 into the world: I hope they don't go out into the world at 18. Another Biblical Family idea is that they can stay home and learn from Dad and Mom and not go to college and waste money and enter another sin-haven, ripe with crucial, life-altering consequences to be made. Same thing with the girls getting a J-O-B: WHY? So she can learn to dedicate herself to another man/leader besides her husband and father -and count on having her own money? **Un-uh. Nope. No way. I, personally, do not want her to have to struggle with that when she is submitting to her husband and her LORD. It is difficult enough in today's feminist society. That just adds to the feminist mentality.
**This is training for God's army. Remember military training? Remember the chain gangs? We have softened life and made it all comfy; and look at our laws, etc., and the value of life now. No pain, no gain. How about Jesus and the life He lived? How about His manner of death?
**Mrs. D - Everyone is welcome here. As I said in a previous comment, I truly am saying this in love. I do not have the art of gentle speech, but, my heart is full of love for you, as a human being and as a fellow Believer and friend. Your choice as a parent is your choice. I will stand before a Holy God and be held responsible for the marriage and the children He has placed in my care for this time. I will not be responsible for your children or choices, so it does not change my love for you!
**I will, however, be responsible for "witnessing" of Him and his WORD. This is my venue to be just that: a homeschool Mom, witnessing for the LORD, not in the pss, but in cyberspace.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FYI- on my blog, and many, many others - ds means dear son, dd means dear daughter, 1dd16 means my 1 child, a daughter, who is 16. I use ds for my boys, but I know saw at another blog that she used 2b6 for her son, meaning boy. Hope that helps! ( ;
Oh, and my dh - dear husband - is My Sweetie.
TOODLES and HUGS to each of ya's.

A little testimony about being at Home!

1:19 PM, Tuesday, May 30, 2006 .. Posted by Jocelyndixon

I don't think that Mom has sheltered us at all....We know what's out there. I know about sex, drugs, relationships and other stuff I don't need in my life. I have been around "Christian PS" kids and they are so in the world that they don't know what is right and what is wrong...most of the time. They just think that they are fine, because they have not been taught by their parents --Who should know what is best for their children by God‘s standards..

My sister's friend who kept her secret and encouraged her to lie- I thought he was a good friend. I was not around her friends because I, most of the time, wasn't included with that "crowd". I am not usually with the "popular" kids. I try to stay back and if I need to say something then I will.
Besides, I just think they are a bunch of fruit-cakes, anyways. I didn't talk to this kid a lot except when with my sis and other than that I wasn't around him. I was very hurt that my sis didn't tell me that she had her email and trusted her friends, but she knew I wouldn't stand for it. I wish her friends had only stopped and said, "I don't think this is right..." If one of them had said that, then we wouldn't have had such a hard and long last year, and I would have had that time to spend getting to know my sis.

4 years ago my sis had other friends at a different church and I hardly remember her from then, because she was caught up in the whole "You have to have your own friends" thing. I am 1yr. 1/2 younger so I wasn't in the youth group, and I didn't get to share that time with her.

Now, after a couple of yrs., she and I are best friends, and we wouldn't give up our friendship for anything. If we hadn't been HS then we probably wouldn't have gotten this close. She would had other friends to go to at PS and I wouldn't have been one of them. I am again, thankful, however, that I am Homeschooled ,and I have been able to learn about what God really wants for me. He doesn't want me to go and get a job or send my children to PS. He also doesn't want me to have a BF, so that when I get married my husband is the first man I date. I am very anxious to see what the future and God have in store for me. I can't wait to have my own children and be able to teach and train them at home where they belong.

Here are a couple posts about Biblical living:
http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/Jocelyndixon/116574/
http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/Jocelyndixon/122159/
http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/Jocelyndixon/113647/
http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/Jocelyndixon/102732/


with much Love,
Myrtle, a Hobbit from Blogger-Earth

Wow !

9:53 PM, Tuesday, May 30, 2006 .. Posted by Canadagirl

I just got done reading yours and your dd's comments. I totally support you and I am glad you don't hold back but are still loving. I am trying to do the same kind of teaching but my ds is working threw things and My job is not done yet. I hope Mrs. D can hear what is truly being expressed. Bless you and your family.
In Him,
-Canadagirl

You Go Girl!!!

11:29 PM, Wednesday, May 31, 2006 .. Posted by MomOfMany

I am so glad I found you...actually you found me and then I found you. I agree with you, you have a wonderful way of articulating your beliefs. I sometimes have a hard time getting what I believe into writing.

I look forward to reading your blog.