MI-OR-IDA-CO Minitaters

Oct. 3, 2009

Worst Mom in America....

Have you seen this article on AOL? I'll give the woman credit, she does have a point about hovering, but allowing a 9 year old to ride alone on a NY Subway, uh uh not a smart move.

Her book is, "Free-Range Kids" by Lenore Skenazy. I've not read the book and I don't really intend to but it did get me to thinking about my own childhood and what "dangers" we were allowed that no one else would be today.

I was 4 1/2 and my Dad used to take me to work with him. He had to travel up to Kalamazoo, MI for a plumbing job and thought I might like to go along. It was fun I had a blast. We stopped at a rest area and dad let me use the rest room. But I got trapped between the double doors with no lights and just started screaming. There wasn't anyone to help me so my Dad had to enter the "Ladies Room" and grab me. It didn't scar me for life to have to use the men's room with my dad standing there, I was only 4 1/2. Today, he'd be arrested as a pervert (which he is NOT).

We rode bikes with metal sticking out, we drank from the garden hose, we chased a horse down just to jump on it's back, we played in the creek with no supervision, etc. You probably had a childhood much like that. Later we turned into latch key kids. My own parents went to Hawaii for two weeks when I was 16 and left me and my 11 year old twin siblings alone. Greatest two weeks of our life, we played board games, watched tv, fixed our own meals etc. We never missed a day of school or church. We didn't have friends over, we didn't tear the house down and we didn't have to have the cops called. Why? Because we had respect for our parents and knew the kind of trouble we would be in and how much dissappointment that would cause.

Would I do that to my kids now? Probably not. For one thing there's more of them and I don't think my teens could handle all of them for an extended period of time. I do give each of them a degree of responsibility. They can play outside by themselves they don't need me for that. They can ride their bikes, play architect with wood pieces, etc. I'd let them drink out of the hose, but we don't have one so no biggy there.

There is a huge misconception that all homeschooled children are socially inept. That their parents hover so badly they can't do anything for themselves. I know you will all disagree with that statement (I do). My kids are so fiercely independent it's funny. Even the five year old, wants to do things himself, no help from Mom or Dad.

I think the biggest difference between our childhoods and theirs is respect. We had respect for our parents and others. Our friends parents were allowed to punish us if we did wrong in their household and we knew it.

Now a days everyone is overly critical of how a child is disciplined and Heaven forbid if you should correct someone else's parenting tactics. Hey if everyone listed to what God has told us and how to live our lives we wouldn't have these problems huh?

Have a good week.
~jaimers~

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Sep. 12, 2009

I wanna be homeschooled, talk to my mom....

Posted in Schooling or Unschooling

Do your kids have friends that want you to "talk" to their parents so they can be homeschooled too? Mine do. I hear it all the time. It's difficult to explain to the child about why you chose to homeschool your own kids. All they hear is that the kids get to stay home. Which equates in their little brains as "free tv when ever you want".

As homeschool moms and dads we know the truth. Our kids don't "veg" out all day. They do study hard, they do have to take their homework seriously and there are consequences for not doing what their home teacher tells them. They may only have class for 4-5 hours a day, but in that 4-5 hours there is no chit chat and wastefullness. When they are done then it can be play time or free reading or Library or cooking if they want. They still don't "veg" infront of the tv unless there is something good on Discovery or The Science Channel.

Trying to enstill in a public school parent that your children are not on a free for all day in and day out can be difficult, so I let my kids do the explaining. Their mannerisms, their tact and all around politeness speaks volumes about the decipline that is used at home when requiring them to do their school work. Their intelligence and willingness to discuss any subject (usually to death) also speaks about their capacity and eagerness to learn about any and all subjects.

It's back to school season here and I'm getting it from all sides about why my kids don't have to get up at 6:30am. For one thing requiring 8 hours of full sleep is important for their brains and also I believe in starting the day off right (not by starting an argument). We do spend the day together, but we also make important family time, where we all are together just to have fun. The children have the TVs and stereo's in their rooms, but like to spend time in the den with the rest of us, not sequestered away like hermits.

Just homeschooling alone did get us where we are today. We as a family are not alone, we put God first in our lives, and therefore by default we put each other before ourselves too. Not to say we are without selfish days (hey I have a five year old I know selfish when I hear it).

If you have advice on how to handle these requests I'd love to hear it.

Thanks and have a good week!
~jaimers~

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Sep. 5, 2009

The End of Another Summer....

Posted in Mommy Experiences

I'm wondering where the summer went? Last thing I remember it was June and raining constantly. Floods, really green grass, snakes and gophers plagued our back yard. Now the trees leaves are turning and I don't remember the flash passing me by.

The kids have finished their first week of school and did quite well. Lots of science and math, as well as a Jr. High kid complaining of way too much English (typical).

The kids had a lot of fun the past couple of months. Camp, rafting down the Boise River, weeks at Grandma's. Me? I worked the whole summer and forgot to take time for myself (again typical).

One day I was hugging my eleven year old little boy and the next thing I knew the little monster was taller than me, his voice is deeper and he has acne. When did that happen? He's just eleven, that's not supposed to happen for a couple more years right? Both of my older boys were baptized this summer. My daughter blossomed into a semi-responsible teenager of 15 (I say semi because it still takes a crane to get her out of bed before noon).

My youngest (5) is now "officially" in school and no longer requires his five minute lap hug in the morning. Breaks my heart, but he wants to be a school kid not a baby. I can respect that. Still who's gonna give mom her five minute hugs?

Husband still doesn't have a job (but now we are forcing him to). Things are a little to tight for my comfort level so I need the cushion a job for him would provide. He's not happy with me, but I can't keep putting in 93 hours every two weeks.

Well time for my favorite season. FALL. Burning leaves, apple cider, crockpot cooking. Yep I'll be a happy camper in no time.

Take care my friends.
~jaimers~

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Jul. 14, 2009

Pedestals of Glass

Posted in Rambling On

Have you ever been put on a pedestal? What was it made of? Glass, stone, marble? Did it crush under the weight of your responsibilities or did you fall from grace and it tumbled down around you?

During my short years on this planet (all 41 of them), I've been put upon many pedestals by people who thought they were doing a good deed. Why am I sharing this? Because I've recently been reminded by someone I love deeply that I've mistook a lot of my accomplishments and kicked them off the pedestal because I have an aversion to accepting them.

The Marble Pedestal - this is the one that our parents put us up on. It's shiny and exotic and it stands out (that's why the Greeks and Romans use the material for show pieces). They put us up there for all the world to see. Look at our accomplishments, see what we made? As children we accept this, as teens we loathe this, as adults we are ashamed of this because no one can live up to the marble's gloss and polish. These are the most fragile of pedestals. These are the pedestals most easily crushed by the weight of the person trying to stay standing on it.

The Stone Pedestal - this is the one that we put ourselves up on. See what I accomplished at work? See what material possessions I have that you don't? See I did this all by myself. As children we are encouraged to compete for the top of the stone pedestal. As teens we are often battered by other's pedestals. As adults we are usually standing on the pedestal by ourselves for because the stone is solid we cannot see those below us that we crushed to get to the top. This is a lonely pedestal that often withstands time, but does not give comfort from the storms.

The Glass Pedestal - this is the most precious pedestal of all. It is the one our loved ones and true friends place us on. Because it is see through we easily acknowledge those that have carried us on their shoulders and they can see our gratitude and appreciation for their efforts. There are no hidden crevices in a glass pedestal. It is smooth and almost transparent. If a crack were to form it could easily be repaired for all would see it and all would make it right again. The one standing on the pedestal has nothing to hide. All the slight imperfections are known and not hidden. While this is the strongest pedestal of all due to the strength of the crowd gathered below it, it can cause the most damage when it is crushed. Shards (often made of harsh words or feelings) slice through the flesh of the crowd as if it were the wind. Glass pedestals cannot be rebuilt once shattered. Not all the pieces will be found and therefore can never be whole again. Glass pedestals must be formed from the new sands of time.

What ever pedestal you are standing on, look to see if it's of the material deserving of you. Whether it be of marble, stone or glass remember one thing: All pedestals come with stairs and you can change your pedestal material one step at a time.

Thank you to those that have put me on my pedestal. And a special thank you to the man who reminded me yesterday that holding my hand and helping me climb the stairs affords you a better trip to your destination at the top.

~jaimers~

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Jul. 13, 2009

That time of year again.....

What do you mean it's the middle of July? It's can't be, I'm not ready yet. I haven't even begun to delve into the fall's school lessons.

Sound familiar? It should, I rant about this every year at this time. I know what I'm going to teach, it's just a matter of laying it all out so that I don't have to rush around every week getting the kids' work together. I'm such a planner and a list maker (my Dad teases me because I make a list of the lists I need to make. Psychotic isn't it?) But I lost my list notebook and now I'm trying to recreate everything it took me all year to think of. The notebook is history because it was on top of a pile of newspapers in my office, and my 8 year old decided to help clean mommy's office. So much for the notebook. (Remember last year it was the 4 year old and my daytimer?). I need a lock on my office.

Oops the 11 year old snacker just discovered the lock I put on the pantry door. I'm bound and determined to save money on groceries and that's where I had to start. The four year old isn't pleased either, but he'll get over it.

The older three kids are heading off to camp in a couple of weeks, and then it's back to Grandma's for more rafting. I miss being a teenager all that fun and no responsibilities. Takes wisdom to admit that huh?

Anyway I'd better get back to recreating my education list. I'm gonna need a LOT more coffee for this one. Reminds me of staying up late and cramming for finals in college. Nah don't miss that as much.

Love to you all my friends
~jaimers~

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