I’ve been working on memorizing one of the prayers from the book The Valley of Vision a collection of Puritan prayers and devotions. The reason I wanted to memorize this particular prayer is because it seems to encapsulate the gospel and benefits of Christ so concisely. The title of the prayer is Victory.
Last weekend was a tough one for me. A couple of things were going on that heightened my emotions. The first was good news that my husband did get the job promotion after all! Praise God, this is such a good thing for him. It means fewer hours at work, less physical labor, and he’ll be doing things that he is more suited to. Then we got the salary proposal and realized that it wasn’t even enough to cover our already trimmed down projected budget. I had hoped the financial crunch we’ve been in would be a temporary state. The proposal, for me, signified that God meant for this trial to last longer. The relief I had hoped for wasn’t there. In addition to this I received word that my mom’s health was rapidly declining. At that time I wasn’t even sure if she would be living more than a few days.
I wish I could say that I responded to these trials with faith and joy but I didn’t. I had been praying for God to help me kill my sin and to reveal it to me and he did. I got a very clear picture of my sinfulness last weekend. Pride, self-pity, anger, bitterness, envy, jealousy, rebellion, idolatry, and unbelief all came bubbling up to the surface. Yuck! Thankfully I was confronted with the gospel several times throughout the weekend and each time it had a healing or convicting effect on me so that by Sunday night I was repentant.
Monday morning I was in my prayer closet feeling emotionally spent but wanting to “make my soul happy in God”, as George Mueller puts it, by meditating on the gospel. I flipped open the prayer Victory and began to read. I felt God speak to me as I thought about the word victory. “How can there be a victory if there hasn’t been a battle?”
An idol I fight a lot is the desire for a carefree life. Yet, it’s in the trials or battles that I grow the most. I don’t often view them as the means God uses to expose my sin so that it can be put to death. I’d prefer a nice life with a perfect image. Is that what glorifies God the most or magnifies Christ’s work on the cross? Is an honest living example of how Christ transforms a life a better picture to an unbelieving world? Of course it is. May I quit wanting to shrink back from trial and trust God to complete the good work he has begun in me.
Here is the prayer:
O divine Redeemer,
Great was thy goodness
In undertaking my redemption,
In consenting to be made sin for me,
In conquering all my foes;
Great was thy strength
In enduring the extremities of divine wrath,
In taking the load of all my iniquities;
Great was thy love
In manifesting thyself alive,
In showing thy sacred wounds,
That every fear might vanish
And every doubt be removed;
Great was thy mercy
In ascending to heaven
In being crowned and enthroned
There to intercede for me,
There to succor me in temptation,
There to open the eternal book,
There to receive me finally to thyself;
Great was thy wisdom in devising this means of salvation;
Bathe my soul in rich consolations of this resurrection life;
Great was thy grace
In commanding me to come hand in hand with thee to the Father,
To be knit to him eternally,
To discover in him my rest,
To find in him my peace,
To behold his glory,
To honor him who is alone worthy;
In giving me the Spirit as teacher, guide, power, that
I may live repenting of sin
Conquer Satan, find victory in life.
When thou art absent all sorrows are here,
When thou art present all blessings are mine.
Comments
Oct. 3, 2007 - What a prayer!
Posted by baronsgirl
That is so neat. Thanks for sharing all of this! I can relate completely to all of those feelings. I remember a time when we could not pay the bills and were relying on others to provide for awhile. It didn't last as long as God has had you in your current situation, but it was tough. And yet, as you say, we grew so much closer to the Lord through it! We were reminded, in a huge and obvious way, that HE is the one who provides for us! Even though we might think the man of the house takes care of us...nope. It's God. Always has been, always will be. He often uses that man of the house to provide for and protect us! But ultimately, it is God. The supplication for grace to endure the harder times and the praise for the answered prayer...it all goes to Jesus.
I wish I could say that the bitterness and anger, all those "ugly" emotions were strangers to me and my heart, but they are all too familiar, as well. What grace, to think that Christ has already covered my sins! That when God looks at me, He only sees His Son, Jesus. And the righteousness bestowed on me because of and through Him. Awesome!!! I often find that I can so easily condemn myself, but I forget that because of Christ, God's Word says that there is NO CONDEMNATION for me! If God, the Sovereign Lord of the universe does not condemn me, who am I to think I should? Oh, the grace is hard to grasp, isn't it??? I'm so thankful His mercies are new every morning!
It's neat to see how He is teaching and growing you! Thanks again for sharing. Love you much and continue to pray.... Jodie