Oct. 8, 2006 - Making Lists
I used to be a huge list maker. I loved lists. I would spend hours making lists and then implementing them. But that was B.A.: Before Autism.
I still make lists -- but I make them for things such as "things to pack" or "things to bring to church" or "things to get at the store."
I was reading a time management article today and it struck me hard how making lists -- that is, plans -- wasn't something that I could do very well once Autism hit our house.
For example, let's say I've made a list to get six important things done today. Well, that would mean I could get those six things done as long as:
1. Nobody wet the bed
2. Nobody needed a trip to the emergency room
3. Nobody spread feces on the walls
4. Somebody didn't get into the refrigerator and eat a jar of mayonaise and peanut butter and spread it all over the counters and then throw it all up on the living room carpet
5. The gallon of milk remained pour-spout side up all day in or out of the fridge.
6. Someone doesn't manage to have a three hour tantrum
7. It doesn't take more than several hours to shower because someone keeps banging their head on the wall and screaming while refusing to cooperate about getting their hair washed
8. The two packs of expensive deli meat I had "planned" to use to make sub sandwiches isn't devoured or fed with sheer abandon and delight to the dogs
9. The dogs aren't let out in the street and the police come calling to issue a citation for dogs without a leash
10. The boys' third pair of dirty jeans for the day turn out to be the last clean ones left and the washer is broken.
Anyway, you get the idea. (I'm sure I'll be editing that list later. I am frankly exhausted right now from living another day in the trenches of autism!)
If I sound like I am whining, I guess I am. I sometimes do look at people with "perfect" little families and wonder what it's like to eat a without the mess and stress of my boys' behaviors. What would it be like to prepare a meal in a nice, clean, well-organized kitchen without interruptions? It must be absolutely heavenly.
Don't get me wrong, I do not value list making over the lives of my boys! Gracious me, no. No, I just feel the need to be real sometimes and whine a little and mourn a little for the many things I've lost to this disease.
Time management? I think that must be for people who live in the land of somewhere else. It certainly isn't possible in Autism country!
I would be able to get more done if I weren't emotionally bankrupt after the boys go to bed and I just sit and stare at the walls until I feel my brain make it's way back into my head and I can feel my limbs again. I just throb from stress at the end of the day. Write when the children sleep? Clean? Sleep comes swiftly once the brain is back in place.
I do get concerned when I look at them now, so tall and strong, and 11 years old. They are man-sized now. They are going to be big, powerful men. It does scare me. How will I handle the teen years?
My guess is -- one minute at a time -- and without any lists at all.
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Oct. 17, 2006 - Untitled Comment |
| Posted by AcceptanceWithJoy |
Oh, my dear friend. I have never been a list maker, but I too had my house turned upside down by Marissa's behaviors. Things have gotten better with age. Oh, things aren't perfect, but much, MUCH better. I tell people all the time, I was a much better parent before I had a child.
Anyway, I did want to tell you. Marissa was still wetting her bed every night when she was 11. We had tried everything including DDAVP. We finally had positive results with Pacific International. It cost about $1000 and we were not able to talk our insurance company into covering the costs of the "education" (despite the fact that they had been paying for the DDAVP).
Your granddaughter is so precious! |
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Dec. 25, 2006 - Untitled Comment |
| Posted by OurHomeSweetHomeschool |
Stopping by to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas as you celebrate the birth of our Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ!!!
Blessings,
Theresa |
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About Me
I have 5 children and three grandchildren. My oldest two children are married with children of their own. My youngest three are still at home. My middle child is 15 has bipolar, semantic-pragmatic disorder, hypothyroidism, adhd, dyslexia, giftedness and other issues. My youngest children, twins, are 11 and have autism, mental retardation, communication disorder, and all the behaviors that go with those lovely diagnoses!
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