• Apr. 17, 2006
P31:26b: Kindness is the rule when she gives instructions
Well, this is certainly a challenge and then some for me. So far today I have yelled at the kids at least twice. And not just a word or two...one time was a lecture, yelled instead of spoken.
The last P31 goal was to rise up early and get a solid start to my day by having peace and quiet to read His Word. I'm happy to say that I have been able to do this pretty consistently. I've read several of Paul's letters and now I'm working through Hebrews.
Next up is my tone of voice.
I have been reading Homeschooling With a Meek and Quiet Spirit by Teri Maxwell. (available here) After listening to my own voice for a few days, it is painfully obvious that I am very much in need of this book and Teri's message. What impresses me the most about Teri is that she admits she used to yell at her kids, but with much prayer and hard work, hasn't yelled for years! I'd be glad to get through a day at this point!
So I have chosen this verse of P31 to work on next. The three areas Teri says are robbers of the meek and quiet spirit are 1: fear and worry 2: disorganization and 3: anger.
First, fear and worry. I have noticed that the time around payday is very anxious for me. Because of the way my husband is paid, sometimes we don't get all the money we expect. So I'm often concerned about being able to pay our bills, put gas in the van, buy groceries, etc. I am also anxious about homeschooling...will I do a good job? Will my children learn anything useful? Can I help them learn to love learning?
Second, disorganization. This is an area I've actually have made improvements to in these last few months, plus I am a naturally organized person to start with. But with children, it is an ongoing, never ending process. Just after Christmas, I went through over 20 totes of clothing, sorting and catergorizing. And now it's just about time to go through clothing again as we prepare for summer and the baby is growing so fast. Also, we are still struggling to get our MOTH schedule in place and let's not even mention our chore situation.
Third, and my biggie, anger. I have struggled with my temper since childhood. I was spanked at school in 2nd grade after I threw a book at my teacher. It took another teacher, kind and patient, an entire school year to help me learn to control my temper. I still use her ideas, such as counting to ten and back to one, to calm my temper and gain control. I get angry when items from the first two robbers crop up, plus I get angry when I can't get things done or when I have too much to do in too little time and especially when I'm tired.
Here is my plan to find my meed and quiet spirit, so that I can give instructions with kindness and not with yelling.
First, confess my worry and anger to the Lord in prayer. I will also begin to pray for a meek and quiet spirit and I'll make a note of this in my prayer journal so I can see progress being made.
Second, I will confess my yelling and anger to my oldest children. I will explain that I want to stop yelling and that consequences for disobedience will be instant and quiet.
Next, I will be sure to keep my husband informed of the state of our finances (which I handle at his pleasure). By sharing my fear and worry with him, I hope that the burden on me will be lighter.
Then, I will go to bed on time every night, so that I can get better sleep. My youngest has night-weaned recently, so I can count on being asleep the whole time I'm in bed, now.
Also, I will seek to get our MOTH schedule in place and also add the chore system in the Maxwell's book Managers of Their Chores (MOTC). The major part of my yelling comes when chores are not done.
Lastly, I will let go of worry about my homeschooling. The Lord has called me to this and as the saying goes, God doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called. So I can trust that He will bring the wisdom, knowledge, people, resources, whatever to me just when I need them, if I continue to seek His will through prayer.
And of course, I will remember that I am setting an example for my children, who have all inherited my temper. I must use every ounce of strength the Lord has given me to control my temper, to speak gently and to model the patience He shows us. My grandchildren deserve no less than my best efforts.
(3 Comments)
(Post A
Comment!)
(Permanent Link)
• Apr. 4, 2006
Stepping Up to the Challenge
The Clean Heart Clean Home Challenge (CHCHC) has another participant! As I looked around my house today, my first thought was: "well, it's been worse". I would only need about 45 minutes to get the main rooms tidied up. But tidy is a long way from clean, in my book. And this challenge is just what I need to get my house ready for spring!
My second thought was: "ugh, this place is a mess". The sun is shining today, a rare spring event here in the Pacific Northwest. That bright light is illuminating all the fingerprints on the windows, the dust on shelves and plants, and is giving the weeds clogging my flower beds energy to grow, grow, grow!!
Day One for me: get organizer printed (done!), insert into notebook, complete weekly menu and schedule, clean out vehicle and make a plan for tackling the front yard (which is thankfully very small!).
I'll post frequently on my progress! I'm going to be posting these challenge entries in my P31 category, because I feel taking better care of my house is part of being a P31 woman. I know my husband appreciates a neat and tidy home and that he will praise my efforts greatly!
Onward!
(0 Comments)
(Post A
Comment!)
(Permanent Link)
• Mar. 23, 2006
P31:15-She gets up while it is still dark
Of the many challenges in Proverbs 31, this is where I decided to start in my P31 journey. It seems to me that the beginning of the day is the logical place to begin. I especially want to start my day with quiet time in His Word, scripture memory work and prayer. A cup of tea on the side and the cat warming my feet.
The trouble is, I'm the quinessential night-owl. My favorite hours of the day are between 10 pm and 2 am. I can get so much done while the house is quiet and my family sleeps. But staying up until 2 am does not allow for early rising. Nor does it make momma happy. And you know the saying, "if momma ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy." That is certainly true at my house.
Going to bed by 10 pm is tricky. If I am lying in bed at 10, saying my prayers, I'll fall asleep quickly. But if I delay, and try to go to bed at 11, I'll often lay awake until after midnight.
The other tricky thing about getting up early is doing it alone. Our youngest, baby S, who is 15 mths, sleeps in a crib in our room. She is a very light sleeper, and even though I have turned down the volume on my alarm to a mere whisper, she is waken by it. Sometimes she'll consent to go back to sleep with a little nursing, but sometimes she won't.
Even if I manage to sneak out of my room alone, inevitably one of my other children hear my quiet footsteps and decide to join me. Having Biblical quiet time with even one of my children nearby is very difficult.
So, I am taking a drastic measure: I will brave the chaos in my sewing room to make dark curtains for the bedrooms. Maybe if the rooms are darker, the children will sleep longer, even the baby. And I can begin my P31 journey.
