Sometimes we say things that don't mke any sense at all or are extremely obvious, like this:

"No, no, no, that won't work! Uncle Monty can't drive, he's dead!" The Reptile Room - Mr. Poe

Or:

"It is very unnerving to be proven wrong, particularly when you are really right and the person who is really wrong is the one who is proving you wrong and proving himself, wrongly, right. Right?" The Reptile Room

See what I mean? It's amazing how much time we spend confusng ourselves and the rest of the world and also make a whole conversation out of boring statements. How confuzzling or world has become.

Sincerely,

Anonymous

You know the world is a very cruel and twisted place when people pay money so that they can see a dwarf so they may vehemtly mock her.

You know the world is a very cruel and twisted place when it is legal for people to kill babies and think nothing of it.

You know the world is a very cruel and twisted place when when senators sit around wasting time by making laws to discontinue black and white TV's in 2008 instead of talking about the War in Iraq.

You know the world is a very cruel and twisted place when yo aren't allowed to have girls in China.

You know the world is a very cruel and twisted place when someone cusses at your friends Mom just because she left her fourteen year old alone.

You know the world is a very cruel and twisted place when a child is forced to see the reality of our world.

You know the world is a very cruel and twisted place when you are called a 'freak' just cause your unique.

You know that the world is cruel when people don't even want to have children because they don't want to gain baby fat. 

These are just a few injustices of our world, and I hope I can help change it.

Sincerely,

Anonymous 

You used to call me your angel, said I was sent straight down from heaven. You'd hold me close in your arms, I loved the way you felt so strong. I never wanted you to leave, I wanted you to here holding me. I miss you, I miss your smile. And I still shed a tear every once in a while, nd even though it's different now your still here somehow. My heart won't let you go, and I need you to know, I miss you, sha la la la, I miss you. You used to call me your dreamer, and now I'm livin' out my dream. Oh how I wish you could see everything that's happening for me. I'm thinking back on the past, it's true that time is flying by too fast. I miss you, I miss your smile. And I still shed a tear every once in a while. And eventhough it's different now your still here somehow, my heart won't let you go, and I need you to know, I miss you, sha la la la, I miss you. I know your in a better place, yeah, but  wish that I could see your face, oh, I know your where you need to be eventhough it's not here with me. I miss you, I miss your smile. And I still shed a tear every once in a while. And eventhough it's different now, I know your still here somehow, my heart won't let you go, and I need you to know, I miss you, sha la la la, I miss you.

That's how I feel right now about my Grandfather. Eventhough he left us one month ago the pain is still as deep as it was at the beginning. I guess as time goes along it will first be the same, but after awhile it will lessen. I really miss him, he was definitley one of my heroes. I just wish I could have told him that before he died. 

Tragically,

Anonymous                                                                                              

I am sincerely and extremely sorry about not writing for sooooooooooooooooooo long, it's just that my family and I have been going through a lot these past three months, but for now on I'm gonna try and write everyday.

My apologies again,                                                                                                    

Anonymous

In everyone'slife (I'm sure,) their ois someone that they utterly adore and think of as their hero. In my life there is more than just one (infact more than forty-ten1 Though I'm afraid that's not a number:( ) but today I felt compelled to share with you my heroes and people that I look up to, her they are:                                 note: some of these persons are fictional

Arrietty Clock 

Beatrix Potter

Edith Holden

J.M. Barrie

Lemony Snicket

Jack Sparrow

Peter Pan

Aragorn

Mary Queen of Scots

Marie Antoinette (I'm not sure if that's how you spell it:)

Wendy Darling

Queen Elizabeth

William Wordsworth

Jane Austen

Mary Lennox

Ravello

Joan of Arc

Lady Red Bird

Megan and Sade

God

The First Women who started the Lady's Right Campaign

My Mom (sometimes. Just kidding:)

Martin Luther King Jr.

Sara Crewe

And those, are the heroes of my life.

With all due respect,

LemonySnicket

This is the Disney character that I am most similar to: 

You scored as Peter Pan. Your alter ego is Peter Pan. You are a child at heart. Anything you believe is possible, and you never want to grow up. Peter Pan 100% Cinderella 88% Goofy 75% Sleeping Beauty 69% The Beast 69% Ariel 50% Snow White 44% Pinocchio 38% Donald Duck 31% Cruella De Ville 31% Which Disney Character is your Alter Ego? created with QuizFarm.com

Last night we were TPd! And whoever did it wrote all over our van: "Peace 2 all" and "We are happy:)" and "Shag Wagon" and they also put smilies and hearts all over it too. And then on the front door they wrote: "Good morning!" and put again "Peace 2 all" and on the windows they wrote "Peace" and peace signs. And a few of the trees had smiles and weird stuff. And then infront of our house on the road they wrote: "Stop, Look ->" and "We Love Jesus" with little hearts and peace signs sprinkled around it. And on our mailbox they wrote: "Mail." And of course the trees look like white puff balls with white ribbons dangling down. My dad said that last night he heard Boo (our dog), barking but Boo barks at even when a pinecone drops so my Mom and Dad paid no mind. Until when they were over they honked their horn and drove off. Then Dad thought he would go take a look and opened the outside door to a white yard. And when my Dad wnt jogging this morning for excersise he noted that we were the only people on the entire street who got TPd! Augh, tht drives me dickons! But I know that if I ever find out who did it I'm going to TP them and write on their car: "Now we're even! Ha ha ha ha!" with shaving cream. So this is just a warning if your the one that did it, I'm witing here for you, and I'm ready!

With all due respect,

LemonySnicket

Today we learned a new clogging song:) It is way hard! But if I really practice I'm sure I'll catch on soon. It's really fast but not too bad. We don't have a performance for awhile but I wish that we would. What is kinda different about this song is that the WHOLE group is doing it, (and there's about twenty of us). We also just a few weeks ago learned yet another song that my group is doing. We had a perfomance not last week but the week before that turned out to be good. I messed up a little but not TOO much. I wish that we could learn a dance that went with the Jack Sparrow Pirates of the Caribbean Dead Man's Chest song. Now that would be totally wicked:) I seriously hope we do. And I also hope that we could learn a dance to go along with "The Last Mimzy' soundtrack. (Oh, I REALLY wanna see that:) That's basically all that is happening now with clogging. But you can join me next week when I give the latest update! Just kidding:)

With all due repsect,

LemonySnicket

I found some Pirates of the Caribbean three pictures today, here they are: 

I LOVE all these pictures! I hope I can see it on opening night:) 

I hve these new neighbors moving in next door and I'm kinda afraid that their going to be heinious! Maybe they'll be nice, but maybe they won't. I guess I will just have to wait very anxiously till next week comes round. Maybe the eleven year old girl will become a good friend, though I still am dreading that she also might become my worst enemy. But the good thing about hat is if they don't like us we out weigh them wth our seven kids against their three. I just hope that everything turns out not too disdaneful.

With all due respect,

LemonySnicket

I'm writing this story and I haven't gotten too far, but I wanted somebody to read it and give their opion, please don't be afraid to tell me if it is bad and it needs work, if anybody has any ideas or corrections please let me know. Here it is:

I am soooooooooo excited! I won the Spelling Bee at my Homschool Group so I'm going to the County!!!! I can't wait! I just hope I don't mess up cause everybodies counting on me! Oh pressure!!!!!!! Well please pray for me:) Wish me luck:)!>3

With all due respect,

LemonySnicket

I just think that this story is totally wonderful! Here it is:

                                                                           Tricks of the Trade

In 1920, two girls from England pulled off one of the biggest photographic hoaxes in history. They said that they had been visited by fairies and had pictures to prove it. Actually, they had taken the photos after cutting out fairy figures and securing them to the earth with hatpins. the Cottingley fairies" fooled many experts-including Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the Sherlock Holmes stories. Few of that time believed young girls could be so crafty with a camera.

Wasn't that a good story? Infact they even made a Documentary/Movie about it. Here's the real picture:

Oh! How I love Peter Pan 2003! It is such a good movie!:) All the actors pertray the roles so well! Did you know that Disney is coming oout with a animated movie about Tinkerbell? I think it's about how Tinkerbell was a young human girl before she was trickely turned into a fairy, see the fairies let her become a fairy so they could boss her around and make her clean all the eating pots after dances and such. That's why she was called Tinkerbell, because she cleaned pots. Thankfully Peter saved her and took her to Neverland with him:) Here are some memorable quotes from Peter Pan 2003:

Peter: Forget them, Wendy. Forget them all. Come with me where you'll never, never have to worry about grown up things again. Wendy: Never is an awfully long time. Smee: Captain, the ice is melting, the sun is out, and the flowers are all in bloom... Captain Hook: He's back. Wendy: Why do you hate him so? Pirate: Beg for your lives. John: My brother and I are English gentlemen. English gentlemen do not beg. [Michael gets on his knees] Michael: ...Please. Please. Peter: Ready to lose the other one? Captain Hook: Not this time. Captain Hook: [to Wendy] Didst thou ever want to be a pirate? Wendy: We must leave at once... before we, in turn, are forgotten. Wendy: Might I have time to consider your generous offer? Captain Hook: Absolutely. Captain Hook: My new obsession is you. Captain Hook: None of my crew will follow you... I swear it. Wendy: What would mother think of my becoming a pirate? Smee: Pan did you a favor, did he, Captain? Captain Hook: A favor? He threw my hand to a crocodile, the beast liked it so much, it's followed me ever since, licking its lips for the rest of me... YOU CALL THAT A FAVOR? [Wendy sews Peter's shadow to his feet] Peter: Oh, the cleverness of me. Wendy: Of course, I did nothing... Peter: You did a little. Wendy: Oh, the cleverness of you. Peter: If you wish it. Slightly: If you wish it? Peter: IF YOU WISH IT. Captain Hook: If I were you, I'd give up. Peter: If you were me, I'd be ugly. Wendy: Peter. You won't forget me, will you? Peter: Me? Forget? Never. Wendy: Will you ever come back? Peter: To hear stories... About me. Hook: And now, Peter Pan, you shall die. Peter: To die would be an awfully big adventure. Smee: It's so exciting, two dead already! Peter: I do believe in fairies, I do, I do. Pirate: [advancing towards the children on Hook's ship] Stop that noise or I'll run you through! Believe in fairies, I do I do! [Wendy has just become the Lost Boys' mother] Peter: Discipline. That's what fathers believe in. We must spank the children immediately before they try to kill you again. In fact, we should kill them. Wendy: Father. I agree that they are... perfectly horrid, but... kill them and they should think themselves... important. The Lost Boys: So important, Peter. Curly: And unique. Wendy: I, propose something far more dreadful. Medicine. The sticky, sweet kind. The Lost Boys: Kill us, Peter. Wendy: This belongs to you, and always will Peter: I want always to be a boy, and have fun. Wendy: You say so, Peter, but I think it is your biggest pretend. Wendy: Where do you live? Peter: Second to the right, and then straight on till morning. Wendy: They put that on the letters? Peter: Don't get any letters. Wendy: But your mother gets letters. Peter: Don't have a mother. Wendy: No wonder you were crying. Peter: I wasn't crying about mothers. I was crying because I can't get this shadow to stick. And I wasn't crying. Mr. Darling: [shouting] No. I must become a man that children fear and adults respect, or we shall all end up in the street. Mrs. Darling: George, not so loud. Aunt Millicent: George, the neighbors will hear. Mr. Darling: Let them hear. Let the whole world know. This [indicating Nanna] Mr. Darling: is not a nurse. This... is a dog. [to Wendy] Mr. Darling: Tomorrow, you will begin your instruction with Aunt Millicent. It's time for you to grow up. Peter: There's mermaids. Wendy: Mermaids? Peter: Indians. John and Michael: Indians? Peter: Pirates. John and Michael: Pirates? Wahoo. [Wendy kisses Peter Pan and he starts to glow] Captain Hook: Pan... you're pink. Wendy: Surely you must have felt love once for something... or someone. Peter: Never. Even the sound of it offends me. [Wendy tries to touch his face, and he jumps away] Peter: Why do you have to spoil everything? We have fun, don't we? I taught you to fly and to fight. What more could there be? Wendy: There is so much more. Peter: What? What else is there? Wendy: I don't know. I guess it becomes clearer when you grow up. Peter: Well, I will not grow up. You can not make me. Peter: [after bumping his head on waking up] I was not asleep. Wendy: Once upon a time there was a boy named Peter Pan, who decided not to grow up. Hook: Skip the prologue Wendy: So he flew away to Neverland where the pirates are. Hook: What fun he must have had. Wendy: Yes but he was rather lonely. Hook: Lonely. He needed a Wendy. Pirate: I need a Wendy. Hook: Why a Wendy? Wendy: He liked my stories. Hook: What stories? Wendy: Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty. Hook: Love stories? Wendy: Adventures! In which good triumphs over evil! Hook: They all end in a kiss. Wendy: gasps Hook: A kiss. He does feel. He feels for you. Hook: She told him stories, He taught her to fly. How? Wendy: You just think happy thoughts. They lift you into the air. Hook: Alas, I have no happy thoughts. Wendy: That brings you down. Hook: How else? Michael: Fairy dust! You need fairy dust! The Lost Boys: Michael! Hook: What of Pan? Would unhappy thoughts bring him down? Wendy: He has no unhappy thoughts. Wendy: Boy, why are you crying? Michael: Mother, can anything harm us after the night lights are lit? Mrs. Darling: No, Precious. They are the eyes a mother leaves behind to guard her children. [Peter and Wendy land to talk to mermaids to find John and Michael] Wendy: Oh, How sweet. [Peter looks disgusted] Wendy: What? Are mermaids not sweet? Peter: They'll sweetly drown you if you get too close Slightly: Well... we have our orders. Shoot the Wendy bird. Ready... Aim... FIRE. [Peter sees a boy flying next to him, forgetting he has just met him minutes before] Peter: Who are you? John: I'm John. Peter: John. [Mr. and Mrs. Darling are rushing up the stairs, right before Peter takes the children to Neverland] Story Narrator: It would be delightful to report that they reached the nursery in time... but then, there would be no story. Captain Hook: She was leaving you. Your Wendy was leaving you. Why should she stay? What have you to offer? You are incomplete. Let's take a look into the future, shall we? You fly to Wendy's nursery and... what's this? The window's closed. Peter: I'll open it. Captain Hook: I'm afraid the windows barred. Peter: I'll call out her name. Captain Hook: She can't hear you. Peter: No. Captain Hook: She can't see you. Peter: Wendy. Captain Hook: She's forgotten all about you. Peter: Stop it. Please. Stop it. [During a swordfight between Peter and Wendy] Tootles: Mother and father are fighting again... Peter: Well I will not grow up, you cannot make me! I will banish you like Tinkerbell. Wendy: I WILL NOT BE BANISHED! Peter: Then leave. And take your feelings with you. Peter: To live would be an awfully big adventure. Wendy: Peter... I should like to give you a kiss. [Peter holds his hand out] Wendy: Don't you know what a kiss is? Peter: I shall know when you give me one. Hook: Old... Alone... Done for. Slightly: I couldn't find the house, and now everyone has a mother but me. [On Wendy being their mother] Slightly: And isn't she just first class? Slightly: Brace yerselves lads. Slightly: I remember kisses, let me see. Aye, that is a kiss. A powerful thing. Slightly: Then she must stay here and die. The Lost Boys and Peter Pan: [gasp] No. Slightly: Of course not. How could I have thought that? Stupid. [gazing up at Wendy and Peter dancing in mid-air] Captain Hook: He has found himself a... Wendy. And Hook is all alone. [Hook asked Tiger Lily if she had seen Peter Pan, and she replies with a foreign language, and then spits at him] Smee: She says sorry, but no. Mrs. Darling: There are many different kinds of bravery. There's the bravery of thinking of others before one's self. Now, your father has never brandished a sword nor... nor fired a pistol, thank heavens. But he has made many sacrifices for his family, and put away many dreams. Michael: Where did he put them? Mrs. Darling: He put them in a drawer. And sometimes, late at night, we take them out and admire them. But it gets harder and harder to close the drawer... and he does. And that is why he is brave. Peter: Then you are my friend no more. Captain James Hook: Proud and insolent youth! Prepare to meet thy doom! Smee: It's all a bit tragic, really, isn't it? John: [upon meeting Peter] You offend reason, sir. Michael: Mm-hmm. John: [sees Peter lift into the air] I should like to offend it with you Peter: You can't catch me and make me a man. Peter: I'm the best there ever was! Peter: She is to tell us stories... SHES... Slightly: Dead... awful. Curly: Tragic. Nibs: Good shot, though. Mrs. Darling: And what's your name? Nibs: Nibs. I plan the battles. Mrs. Darling: Would you like a mother, Nibs? Nibs: [crying] Yes! Captain Hook: It is your requiem mass, boy! Captain Hook: Split my infinitives! Captain Hook: How like a girl! Captain Hook: So Peter Pan, this is all your doing? Peter: Aye James Hook, it's all my doing. Story Narrator: All children grow up... except one. Peter: Promise me one thing leave Hook to me. Wendy: I promise. Captain Hook: Fly to the rescue, Pan. I'll shoot you . . right through your noble intentions. Wendy: Michael? John? Where are my brothers? Peter: Who? Captain Hook: [Guessing who he is] Vegetable? Peter: No... Captain Hook: Mineral? Peter: No... Captain Hook: Animal? Peter: Yes. Captain Hook: Man? Peter: NO! Captain Hook: Boy? Peter: Yes! Captain Hook: Ordinary boy? Peter: No! Captain Hook: Wonderful boy? Peter: Yes! Wendy: My unfulfilled ambition is to write a great novel in three parts about my adventures. Aunt Millicent: What adventures? Wendy: I've yet to have them, but they will be perfectly thrilling. Peter: Wendy? One girl's worth more than 20 boys. Wendy: [under bed sheets] You really think so? Peter: I live with boys, the lost boys, they are well named! Wendy: Who are they? [asking as she gets out from under sheets and makes Peter fall off the bed] Peter: Children who fall out of their prams when the nurse is not looking. If they are not claimed in seven days, they are sent to the Neverland. Wendy: Are there girls too? Peter: Girls are much to clever to fall out of their prams. [he says as he looks through the heart in Wendy's bed] Twin: Do you tell stories? Wendy: Yes. Peter: Was it you, Tink? [Tink gets a halo] Tink: Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hook: If you are Captain James Hook... then who am I? Peter: You... are a... codfish! Peter: Tinkerbell... She's my fairy. Wendy: But, there's no such thing as f- [Peter flies up and closes her mouth] Peter: [firmly] Don't say that. Every time someone says that, a fairy somewhere falls down dead. [he goes to look for Tinkerbell] Peter: And I'll never find her if she's dead! Wendy: You don't mean to tell me... there's a *fairy* in this room? Wendy: Sir, you are both ungallant and deficient! Peter: How am I deficient? Wendy: You're just a boy. Wendy: My parents wanted me to grow up. Captain Hook: Growing up is such a barbarous business, full of inconvenience... and pimples.

Here are some more LOTR pictures:

Isn't this picture the best?!?

This drawing is of a enchanting elf women.

This is a really cool picture of 'Galadriel's Gift'.

This drawing of a Nazgul is pretty creepy:(

This Nazgul is creepy too!

This drawing is really good, even if it is a bad guy!

Ditto about this Orc.

Ditto again:)

I love this elf girl, she looks so confident and royal!:)>3

I really don't know what this is, all I know is that it is a bad guy called Snaga.

This Troll drawing is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good! I wish I could draw good guys that good:)

Samething about this bad guy! Lol

Okay, I think this Uruk-Hai is pretty scary too!

I gotta get off, but I'll post more pictures in a second.

With all due respect,

LemonySnicket

Here are some more Lord of the Ring pictures:

Isn't Frodo just so innocent looking in this picture?

Hold on, my computer is saying that I don't have enough available room, so tomorrow I'll try and post the pictures. I'm sorry about all these problems:(

With all due respect,

LemonySnicket

I found the most amazing website! It's called http://fan.theonering.net/art/gallery/range/100 and on it everybody that wants to can post pictures of things in Lord of the Rings that they drew on it. A lot of them are really wicked! Check 'em out:

This drawing is of a archer that looks really awsome! Don't you agree?

I'm guessing that this Dwarf is Gimli, but I'm not sure.

I love this girl Elf drawing! It is sooooooooooooooo enchanting!:)

It never really shows any Elf children in Lord of the Rings so I guess this is a pretty good guess as to what they really look like.

This Elf is so beautiful! She looks almost exactly like how I draw Elves!

I think this is cool because it is showing you what a Cavetroll looks like from a Hobbit's piont of view.

My computer is telling me that I don't have enough available space to put anymore pictures on here, so I'll just start a new entry.

With all due respect,

LemonySnicket

I love Pirates of the Caribbean too! I mean who doesn't? I have to get off, but first here are some quotes from The Curse Of The Black Pearl:

Memorable Quotes from Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003) Barbossa: First, your return to shore was not part of our negotiations nor our agreement, so I must do nothin'. And secondly, you must be a pirate for the Pirate's Code to apply, and you're not. And thirdly, the Code is more what you'd call "guidelines" than actual rules. Welcome aboard the Black Pearl, Miss Turner. Elizabeth: Captain Barbossa , I am here to negotiate the cessation of hostilities against Port Royal . Barbossa: There are a lot of long words in there, Miss; we're naught but humble pirates. What is it that you want? Elizabeth: I want you to leave and never come back. Barbossa: I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request. Means "no". Elizabeth: Very well. I'll drop it. [dangles medallion over the sea] Barbossa: Me holds are burstin' with swag. That bit of shine matters to us? Why? Elizabeth: It's what you've been searching for. I recognized the ship. I saw it eight years ago on the crossing from England . Barbossa: Did ya, now? Elizabeth: Fine. Well, I suppose if it is worthless then there's no point in me keeping it. [it drops a bit, the pirates lunge forward] Barbossa: No! Ah. [chuckles] Barbossa: You have a name, Missy? Elizabeth: Elizabeth... Turner. I'm a maid in the Governor's household. Barbossa: Miss Turner...? [turns to face the pirates] Pintel: Bootstrap. Barbossa: And how does a maid come to own a trinket such as that? Family heirloom, perhaps? Elizabeth: I didn't steal it, if that's what you mean. Barbossa: Very well, you hand it over and we'll put your town to our rudder and ne'er return. Elizabeth: [she hands it over] Our bargain? [Barbossa walks away from her] Bo'sun: Still the guns and stow 'em, Signal the men, set the flags and make good to clear port. Elizabeth: Wait! You have to take me to shore. According to the Code of the Order of the Brethren... Barbossa: First, your return to shore was not part of our negotiations nor our agreement so I must do nothing. And secondly, you must be a pirate for the pirate's code to apply and you're not. And thirdly, the code is more what you'd call "guidelines" than actual rules. Welcome aboard the Black Pearl, Miss Turner . [the other prisoners are whistling and calling for the dog with the keys in his mouth] Jack Sparrow: You can keep doing that forever, the dog is NEVER going to move. Murtogg: What we doin' 'ere? Mullroy: The pirates come out, unprepared and unawares. We catch 'em in a crossfire... send 'em down to see Old Hob. Murtogg: I know *why* we're here. I mean, why aren't we doin' what - what Mr. Sparrow said? With the cannons and all? Norrington: Because it was Mr. Sparrow who said it. Murtogg: [short pause; he turns to Mullroy] You don't think 'e was tellin' the truth? Pintel: [Pintel and Ragetti burst into the room] We know you're here, Poppet. Ragetti: Poppet. Pintel: Come out... and we promise we won't hurt you. Ragetti: What? Pintel: [smiles at Ragetti] We will find you, Poppet. You've got something of ours, and it calls to us. The gold calls to us. Ragetti: Gold calls... Pintel: [opens door of the closet] 'Ello, Poppet. Elizabeth: Parley! Ragetti: What? Elizabeth: Parley. I invoke the right of parley. According to the Code of the brethren, set down by the pirates Morgan and Bartholomew , you have to take me to your Captain. Pintel: I know the code. Elizabeth: If an adversary demands parley you can do them no harm until the parley is complete. Ragetti: To blazes with the code. Pintel: She wants to be taken to the Captain. And she'll go without a fuss. We must honour the Code. Governor Swann: So this is your choice. You know he is a blacksmith. Elizabeth: No he's a pirate. Will Turner: Barbossa, you lying *******! You swore she'd go free! Barbossa: Don't dare impugn me honor boy! I agreed she go free, but it was you who failed to specify when or where. Though it does seem a shame to lose somethin' so fine, don't it, lads? The Crew: Aye. Barbossa: So I'll be havin' that dress back before ye go. Jack Sparrow: I always liked you. Bo'sun: Grr... Elizabeth: Goes with your black heart. Barbossa: Ooh, it's still warm. The Crew: Off you go!; Come on!; Get on with it! Bo'sun: Too long! Jack Sparrow: I really rather hope we were past all this. Barbossa: Jack... Jack! Did you not notice? That be the same island we made you the governor of on our last little trip. Jack Sparrow: I did notice. Barbossa: Perhaps, you'll conjure up another miraculous escape, but I doubt it. Off you go. Jack Sparrow: The last time you left me a pistol with one shot. Barbossa: By the powers, you're right. Where be Jack's pistol? Bring it forward. Jack Sparrow: Seeing as there's two of us, a gentleman would give us a pair of pistols. Barbossa: It'll be one pistol as before, and you can be the gentleman and shoot the lady; and starve to death yourself. Town Clerk: Jack Sparrow. Jack Sparrow: Captain... Captain Jack Sparrow. Town Clerk: ...for your willful commission of crime against the crown. Those crimes being numerous in quantity and sinister in nature... Elizabeth: This is wrong... Governor Swann: Commodore Norrington is bound by the law, as are we all. Town Clerk: ...impersonating an officer of the Royal Navy; impersonating a clergy of the Church of England... Jack Sparrow: Oh yeah, heh heh Town Clerk: ...arson; kidnapping; perjury; piracy; pilfering; deprivation of a Federal Loyalist. For these crimes you will be hung by the neck until dead. May God have mercy on your soul. Will Turner: You cheated. Jack Sparrow: Pirate. Jack Sparrow: The only rules that really matter are these: what a man can do and what a man can't do. For instance, you can accept that your father was a pirate and a good man or you can't. But pirate is in your blood, boy, so you'll have to square with that some day. And me, for example, I can let you drown, but I can't bring this ship into Tortuga all by me onesies, savvy? So, can you sail under the command of a pirate, or can you not? [repeated line] Jack Sparrow: Savvy? Anamaria: You're daft, lady! You both are! Mr. Gibbs: Daft like Jack. Mr. Gibbs: Then, on the fourth day, he roped himself a couple of sea turtles, lashed 'em together and made a raft. Will Turner: He roped a couple of sea turtles. Mr. Gibbs: Aye. Sea turtles. Will Turner: What did he use for rope? Jack Sparrow: [from beside them] Human hair. [pause] Jack Sparrow: From my back. Jack Sparrow: Move away. Will Turner: No. Jack Sparrow: Please move? Will Turner: No. I cannot just step aside and let you escape. Jack Sparrow: This shot was not meant for you. Jack Sparrow: [to Weatherby Swann] I think we've all arrived at a very special place. Spiritually, ecumenically, grammatically. Jack Sparrow: I want you to know that I was rooting for you. Know that. [to Commodore Norrington] Jack Sparrow: Elizabeth... it would never have worked between us darling. I'm sorry... Will... nice hat. Friends... This is the day that you will ALWAYS remember as the day that you... [backs up and trips over ledge] Elizabeth: Captain Barbossa, I am here to negotiate the cessation of hostilities against Port Royal. Barbossa: There be a lot of long words in there, miss. We're naught but humble pirates. What is it that you want? Elizabeth: I want you to leave and never come back. [crew laughs] Barbossa: I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request... Means "no." Jack Sparrow: What's your name? Will Turner: Will Turner. Jack Sparrow: That would be short for William, I imagine. Good strong name, no doubt named for your father, eh? Will Turner: Yes. Jack Sparrow: Well Mr. Turner, I've changed me mind. If you spring me from this cell, I swear on pain of death, I shall take you to the Black Pearl and your bonnie lass. Do we have an accord? [puts out his hand] Will Turner: Agreed. [they shake hands] Jack Sparrow: [after Will draws his sword] Put it away, son. It's not worth you getting beat again. Will Turner: You didn't beat me. You ignored the rules of engagement. In a fair fight, I'd kill you. Jack Sparrow: That's not much incentive for me to fight fair, then, is it? Elizabeth: [after Barbossa has cut her hand slightly] That's it? Barbossa: Waste not... Norrington: I don't care for the situation. Any attempt to storm the caves could turn to an ambush. Jack Sparrow: Not if you're the one doing the ambushing. I go in and convince Barbossa to send his men out with their little boats. You and your mates return to the Dauntless and blast the bejesus out of them with your little cannons, eh? What do you have to lose? [he puts his hand on Norrington's shoulder] Norrington: Nothing I'd lament being rid of. [brushes Jack's hand off in disgust] Jack Sparrow: Now, to be quite honest with you, there's still a slight risk to those aboard the Dauntless, which includes the future Mrs. Commodore. Norrington: I, uh, apologize if I seem forward, but I must speak my mind... Ah, this promotion throws into sharp relief that which I have... not yet achieved: a marriage to a fine woman. You have become a fine woman, Elizabeth. Elizabeth: [her corset is choking her] I can't breathe! Norring