Teaching my daughter about dancing with your husband...

Becca (16) does alot of *thinking*....

then she hits me with things outa the blue... Gotta love it. This is what children... especially those moving into adulthood do. They are watching and trying to figure things out.

Soooo she said *something* the other night that she wants to know her future husband's beliefs on before she marries him. It is something our family does, but she is thinking maybe it is better not to do. What it is... really does not matter here. She has her reasons... well thought out and backed in Scripture... but I actually stopped her from going into them with me... and explained why...

I kinda have similar thoughts fluttering around the edges on this topic... but I do not go there. It is something that for now my husband views differently.

Just the night before during our  family Bible study Harold had brought up to the dc how much he and I are learning and unlearning as we study the Word... and that our walk today is not our walk 5 years ago.. and Lord willing not our walk 5 years from now AND that he hopes our children will grow in the Lord and that someday they might learn something from Scripture that we do not know...

I told Becca that this is pretty much what daddy was talking about, but *I* am not *going there*.. that this is daddy's area to study and be convicted of... and I commented that there are times a wife says something or brings something to his attention AND times she does not and that over the years you learn when to speak and how and  more importantly when to be silent...

Then I told her about my friend http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/OreoSouza/ who calls this *dancing with your husband* and how each couple dances a bit differently from every other, but that when each pair is in rhythm together how lovely the dances all are... and that if and when she marries she and her dh will need to learn how to dance this dance together..... and their dance will be unique to them.

This was brought home to me again yesterday and today. We are having a struggle right now... my husband and I. No we are not fighting, but a hard no win issue has come up. I have been given outside advice that is well meant and from the heart, but it does not fit how my husband and I dance together. I have likely frustrated some dear ladies and I am sorry, but my priority after my Lord is to dance with my husband... OUR dance. This is a hard dance for me today, but thankfully unlike in *standard dancing* when we dance with our husbands there is a third partner involved who helps us keep in rhythm if we let Him lead.