Bats

Summer 2006

 I am not, in general, opposed to bats. They are afterall God’s creatures. They are small, sort of cute (from a DISTANCE) and they serve a purpose in life. (I forgot what it is but I am assured, they do.) So you will believe me when I say that I have nothing personal against them. Well, HAD nothing personal against them. Now it is personal. We have bats. Bats in the attic. Now, bats in the attic isn’t a truly horrible thing. After all, I NEVER go in the attic so I don’t have to see them there. But they got uppity and decided that their living quarters weren’t posh enough and attempted to move in downstairs. With us. With me. IN MY KITCHEN. I have never been especially good at sharing my kitchen, even with people. I certainly am not interested in sharing it with bats. I did not fuss too much when we found dead bats in the downstairs hall. They were, in fact, dead. I did not fuss too much (well, ok, I did fuss a lot,) when we found a live bat downstairs. BUT the final straw was when I not only found, but almost touched, a LIVE BAT hanging from the inside of my back door. The door I use 1,000 times a day. It was not even up high – it was right at my hand height – and it had no business being there. So, I declared war.

 After spending an inordinate amount of time (I’ll spare you the details of all the fruitless phone calls) getting an exterminator to come “take care of the bat problem,” They came. They went in the attic. They confirmed (surprise, surprise) that we did, indeed, have bats. Then, and I am NOT making this up: they said they could not kill the bats as they are a protected species. They would be happy to remove them for a mere $100.00 per bat. Seriously. Only $100.00 PER BAT. Bats the size of my hand. Little, harmless, furry critters that don’t fight back and are, in fact, ASLEEP while you remove them!

 But wait, it gets better. (And remember, I am NOT making this up.) They could not begin removal (assuming I would even pay them to do this) until AFTER THE “OFFICIAL BAT MATING SEASON” was over. So let me get this straight, I said. We have to wait around while they do their thing, bringing yet more bat-lets into this world (do they charge half-price for baby bats?) and once they have happily produced large, homeschool-sized bat broods, then and only then, can we have them removed? Righto.

 Where’s my shotgun?

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Comments

Posted by JenIG

oh. my. heck.
yuck yuck yuck yuck.
ps when should i pick you up from the airport in Feb?

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Posted by Dell

So did I read right? The rumor is that Maggie has bats in her belfry? Oh... not the belfry, the attic. Pretty close. ;)



While I'm not anti bat in theory I'd not want them in my house! (Although I too have been accused of having them in my belfry.)



That is REDICULOUS that they charge $100 per bat AND that you have to wait until after mating season. Maybe the reasons are mostly financial? I mean at $100 per bat, they want more bats!



Rediculous. My sister had bats at her cabin and I think removed them with gloves and a dustpan. (I don't think she waited until mating season was over though. Shh... don't tell the bat police.)

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Posted by HomegrownHearts

I don't think I can take any more of your bat stories. A friend of mine in Michigan (no, not THAT friend) was thinking of getting her son a bat house for Christmas - maybe you can cage the things up and send them to her. They can mate all they like and they'd have some woods and a pond...sounds like the perfect solution to me. Unless you aren't allowed to export bats to another state - is Delaware a bat-snob state?

I'm glad you figured out your password. Your request did get to me and is currently buried under more tech support requests than I care to count. And, no, I have not been spending my 'spare' time doing word association. Take a look at the HSBTechBlog and you'll see what I've been doing, LOL.

Good to see you back!

Jodi

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Posted by jayfromcleveland

Hey Mags, so what, this happened last summer? Around when you last blogged? It sure must've taken you an inordinate amount of time to fix the problem! So what, you think you can just waltz in here and post again after a half-year and pretend like it's just another blog post? Sheesh!

I once was attacked by a bat in my old bachelor pad, 20 years ago. To this day, I wonder if it really happened or if it was hallucination. Pretty wacky experience, whether real or imagined.

So I see you're going to the Cincy con. Maybe we'll see you there? Hope my book will be ready by that time. happy new year, j

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Posted by sharoncrooks

Isn't today's business world just peachy? Since they are protected, those who deemed them to be protected should come to your house and remove them, FOR FREE, lol. Nothing like knowing bats are doing their thing in your attic, AND once that happens, how many cute, furry, little critters will you then have to pay to get rid of?
Unbelievable! <handing over my shotgun to you>

-Shari

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Posted by mom2rebels

Just be sure they fly NORTH from your house and not South towards mine! We also had a fun (NOT) bat experience this past summer. I blogged about it, so feel free to find my blog entry if you want to commiserate with someone. At least you were able to get a price on the removal...all of our phone calls ended with "all we can do is put in a little door for them to get out, but not back in" and that little door musta been made of gold, 'cause it wasn't cheap! We opted for making our own little door. We aren't sure if they are gone or just hibernating for the winter, guess we'll find out in spring! It's nice to see you blogging again neighbor!

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Posted by annointed

ewww.... we had a bat stuck between the storm window and the inside window -- when we tried to move the window so it could have a place to crawl out and fly away - it showed its horrid teeth and screeched at us -- my 10 yr old and I screamed!! Then -- I moved the window the wrong way and it opened the inside window -- oh my goodness - I was shaking getting it closed - and then it squished the bat - but he is was still alive... and crawled out somehow... yuk yuk!!

Welcome back!

Melody (Vanna # 1) in Minnesota!!

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