Sigh....In the past 10 years as a SAHM I have had countless number of people telling me that I need a maid*. When I had 1 child then and now when I have 6 children. This refrain is repeated ad nauseum! Sigh.

Does it annoy me?

YES!!!

Why do people do that?! And I have noticed that it is people who have a maid who'll tell me to get one! Then in the same breath they would complain about their maid.

I was thinking and thinking about this after a very recent suggestion that I get a maid (like this morning!) and I think I have got it figured out! Haha!

The answer could be this very telling reply I had from a fellow SAHM who has a maid : You need a maid because since I can't handle the children and the household without one, how can you?Meaning : if I, with less children need one, you with a lot more children and younger ones at that, definitely need one.

Hmm...

So is it a case of maidless SAHMs making SAHMs with maids feel bad/inadequate that they need a maid? Would they feel better if we finally get a maid? I hope not coz I am sure that is not the intention of maidless SAHMs.

Would I like to have a maid? Yes and no.

On bad days when the house is in a mess and I am so, so physically tired, Yes! So that I do not have to do the housework and other stuff that I don't like to do - dusting, changing of bedsheets, cleaning the fans, the toilets.....And perhaps the occasional need to run some errands/dr's appointments without 6 small bodies tailing along. An extra pair of hands is definitely helpful. And how nice to just open my mouth and get things done without me having to get off my butt!

But generally, no, coz I really cherish the privacy we have right now. Plus the need to watch out for, manage and care for another person will probably stress me. Even if she is a good helper. But mostly, I like not having to look over my shoulder all the time, being able to leave money and other valuables around. Even having my parents or ils over at my place when I want to rest makes me feel awkward. Can't imagine having a stranger in the house all the time!

Will I never get a maid? Well, I have learnt to never say never! We may have to one day. Like if I ever get blessed with twins  or have elderly or sick parents/parents-in-laws stay with us.

But I tell you what I am planning to get to ease the workload (besides training the children to be helpers in the home), I am getting the....Roomba and the Scooba from iRobot!!!   Now these can be my maids and I don't have to bother about them intruding my privacy!  I told dh that if they work out, they would be better value for money than a once-a-week part timer cleaner since they can be used daily! Ok - so I still have to dust and wash the toilets but hey! that'll be a fraction of what I do around here!

And do you know what I would really like? A cook! Yes! A live-in personal cook would be my idea of bliss! Imagine just turning up at the meal times and having healthy, yummy meals all prepared for you. Every meal, every day. Heaven!!!

Edited : No, I made a mistake, I don't want a live-in cook either! Lol! I just want a personal chef that'll come, whip up delicious meals and leave - 3x a day!

* maids - This for you US and Australian moms In Singapore (like the other SE Asian countries), a live-in maid is relatively cheap. And so, it has become very common to have a maid in the home. When one doesn't have one, one is looked upon with either admiration or as if you have 3 heads on you.  It is as though one's household cannot function without a live-in maid. But there are households without maids even WOHM households.

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Posted by Leng Leng

Hey, I like the idea of a live-in cook too. Really hate the meal planning and cooking. Now with a newborn, I have to be extra creative to come up with meals which can be ready in minimal time and yet nutritious.

Posted by Delci

Hei, if you getting the iRobots dual, lmk if they really work and help!

(and I fall into one of those mums who ask if you need maid :P. pai seh...)

Posted by Eve

I agree with you, Serene. I don't have a maid even though I used to grow up with one. I work from home, do the housework and care for the baby myself. Everyone tells me to get a maid. All. The. Time. I know some may have good intentions but it really annoys and frustrates me because more often than not, their nagging makes me feel like I need a maid because I'm not doing my job well enough :( It can be very demoralising especially when I personally think I'm holding up pretty well myself.

Posted by clarinegoh

Hey, fully agreed with all hands and legs up!

When I'm pregnant with my 1st child, everyone says I need a maid then when pregnant with 2nd one, everybody says I surely need a maid!!!

Till now I've proved all wrong!
My reason is same as yours - 'Privacy', this is more important for us than 'tiredness'....
I can definitely feel your tiredness but really kowtow to you cos I've got 2 kids below 6 yrs old, without help and it's so tiring for me, yet you've 6! kekeke.....

If you do get the irobot, pls let me know if it's helpful cos I've been eyeing on it for a while already....hahaha....

Posted by sam

Cool ! I also want - when I don't have maid - dunno when though. But I'd be happy to streamline.

You'd probably - after awhile, be like me (if have maid), hope that all things will be done automatically without having to "open mouth". But other than some issues, luckily my maid doesn't need to be "babysat" and is not quite a burden in that sense.

And yes, I do leave things around, valuables included, and EXPECT them to be there or at least moved to where I normally might keep them....but not stolen.

sam

Posted by sheza

I agree with you. Cooking is a real killer. Although I like to cook but to cook everyday and get it out on time ... argh!

Posted by Connie

Think I've been taking my Indonesian maid of 8 years for granted. (Tsk! tsk!) She is a very great helper. She came when I was still working full-time and pregnant with no3. Then she became a believer and took to task to train my children to cook as well!
She's really a blessing to my family as we can trust her with the children and our things at home. She is teachable and ever willing to learn. She is taking 'N' level on English next week!