I have written many times to encourage any of you who feel led to do so to attend the She Speaks conference.  The other day we received this letter and I wrote and asked the author if I could post it here.  I have omitted her name to protect her identity, as she shares some touchy stuff.  I wanted to share this letter because I feel she puts into words the impact this conference can make in the life of a woman who attends.  I have a hard time communicating what God does in and through this one weekend, but I think her testimony will give you a glimpse. 

I hope to meet many of you there this year!  One of you recently let me know that her husband has promised that that is the first check they are writing when their tax refund comes in! 

For more info and to register, go to www.shespeaksconference.com.  If you have a She Speaks testimony you would be willing to share, let me know and I will post it here!

Dear Proverbs 31 Ministries,

I have been to She Speaks 4-5 times.  Actually the way I got there was a miracle in and of itself.  I seem to be the only one in my church who remembers seeing a note in our monthly newsletter that Lysa was speaking at another church about half an hour away.  I’d never ever heard of Lysa but had a burning desire to go hear about getting equipped to write & speak.  Somehow in the midst of my life and dysfunction, which had not really allowed me to do anything for myself, I arrived at the talk in _____________ town.

Lysa mentioned She Speaks, it was at least 4 years ago, as I was pregnant with my 3 year old, and something inside me got me to Charlotte that summer.  As I told one of my friends last night who is coming down this year with me, She Speaks has not left me with a joyful high, it has moved the direction of my life.  

The next time I made it to She Speaks I was very emotionally ill.  The baby I had carried a few years before was one that I begged, virtually forced, my husband for.  It was our 4^th and it seems that the acclamation of the pregnancy was the opening of a door for outright abuse.  Not physical, but emotionally I was so beaten that if you could have seen the welts on my heart you would have gasped.  I wanted to jump off The Chesapeake Bay Bridge into the arms of my Father, I hit my stomach thinking if the baby that I had so desperately wanted died, maybe that abuse would stop.

When I arrived at She Speaks, I was bound tight.  “No God,” I replied as He whispered ‘let me in’.  “No, God I am never going to let anyone in my heart again, not even You.”  Oh but by the end of the weekend I had my hands up and I wouldn’t be surprised if I was up on a chair singing “Yes Lord Yes Lord Yes Lord Yes”. 

My husband and I were so sick, so helpless, we loved each other so much but we simply could not make it work, no matter how hard we tried.  Guess what!  God the one on His mighty Throne, the One we call out to over and over and over in faith picked up a mountain and moved it.  May I tell you under that mean abusive husband I found the most wonderful man of God.  The most awesome lover, provider and dedicated person God could have ever given me.  When I found him I was beyond overjoyed to realize I was married to him and had 4 children with him!

I learned a lot about abuse and I want to talk about it.  I spoke for 3 minutes very vaguely at the sharing day of my bible study last spring and women seemed to swarm me with the same devastating setup in their homes.  Christian women are there and I want to reach them.  My heart is exploding with messages but my flesh says I hope no one ever asks me to speak. 

I am coming again to She Speaks.  I brought a book proposal the last 2 years, and although I was told no one wanted to read an autobiography of someone they don’t know (which believe you me I totally understand), someone form the 700 Club came for a visit recently and took it (I got saved watching the 700 Club).  He called back hoping to give it to the producers of the show.  Real funny God!  My story parallels much of what I have heard Lysa say about her past and I believe I too am radically obedient and radically blessed. 

God wanted me to write this AM.  God wanted me to tell you how He used you.  The message is my life was transformed each time I attended She Speaks.  I believe it was because you asked Him to do that.  Ask again, I am praying with you.  I have the ministry covered as you prepare for this life altering event.  Thank you to everyone.  What God does through me is amazing and I’m only one person who has been blessed and transformed by you.