Posted in Spiritual Musings
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Salaciously that spirit Joy took leave
No, no, nothing of it!
Dropping on my knees His light shone once more...till the worthless dreams and Joy walked back.
Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore. Psalm 16:11
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Posted in Spiritual Musings
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Recently, my daughter took the wrong kind of cookie. She dropped her guard for a few seconds and the allergens she consumed set off a series of emergencies. Dropping your guard. Dropping my guard. That is so easy to do. Like going down the morality slide, it all starts when we drop our guard. When we make little bad choices. When we let that little seemingly innocent temptation squat in a tiny corner of our heart. And we think nothing of it. Then we let another seemingly friendly foe find residence in another part of our heart. And we dismiss its presence. Soon, we have an entire population of “little” enemies of the soul, chipping away our resolve to walk in the light. And one day, we make a bad choice, topping all the little bad choices we had been making. And guess what? That sin of ______________(fill in the blanks) we thought we had conquered suddenly finds full expression. And nothing can stop the motion of consequences that follows. Not even true repentance. Think Adam and Eve. Think Jacob. Think David. This Sunday afternoon, I pray I will not let pride blind me to all the “little” bad choices I have carelessly made. I pray I have the resolve, and the courage, to kick out every enemy of my soul that I had given tacit permission to become a tenant in my heart...they do add up, exponentially. No, I don't want to even think about taking the first bite of the “cookie” just because I can rationalize away its possible harm it might do to me. Sometimes all you need is just one bite and that very bite can very well be the one that totally destroys your testimony and witness. My spirit is allergic to anything that displeases the Lord. Instead of occasionally “testing” those spiritual allergens or pretending they don't really affect me, I should just eliminate them. And I should remember that they are everywhere, and like food allergies, I can never be too careful... |
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So today is the start of the Holy Week... Can you imagine what it must have been like that Palm Sunday when Jesus rode on an untainted, never harnessed colt towards Jerusalem? That itself was in fulfillment of a 500 year old prophecy (Zechariah 9:9). As He rode majestically and yet humbly, the crowds gave Him a rousing cheer. They praised Him. They honored Him. The response of the Pharisees was nothing majestic. They were vexed. They told Him to rebuke His disciples. In today's parlance, they wanted Him to ask them to “shut up!” But what was the response of Jesus? We read in Luke 19:40: But He answered and said to them, “I tell you that if these should keep silent, the stones would immediately cry out.” So if the disciples should hold their peace, God would raise up even inanimate objects like the lifeless stones to declare His praise. Wow! Our God is sovereign. He rules over all. There is no creature or activity that is not under His government. He can do whatever He desires in every realm of creation. Whatever the LORD pleases He does, Psalm 135:6 Yes, our sovereign and omnipotent God can do whatever He desires, even with stones. When Jesus rode into Jerusalem, He was officially presented as the Son of God and the King of kings. We pay homage to earthly kings and rulers whose lives are frail and whose kingdoms are transient. Should our response to our King of kings be any less? How foolish the proud Pharisees were to want the disciples (and all the women and children) to “shut up!" They were totally devoid of any kind of spiritual understanding. Don't let anyone muzzle your praise today. Or any day. Keep it coming. Keep it flowing. Our King of kings deserves it. |
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I began the Lenten journey with determination and high hopes. I visualized myself pouring over the Word of God long before the sun had risen. I saw myself wearing a sublime smile as I touched all my household duties with joy, and greeted each burden with grace. After all, it's Lent, and I was focusing all my energy on working out spiritually. And with my whole armor consciously tacked on, surely I would be more “successful” than on “regular” days... (Deep down though I was wondering how I would be tested and was actually a bit apprehensive blogging about my intentions here.) So the kids fell ill. My daughter had the worst case of flu and the two weeks of getting her better and then trying to normalize our schedule didn't leave me looking or acting exactly angelic. You know, three things really get me all discombobulated: 1.when my children are unwell And because I didn't go for my normal physical workout as in my TKD sessions for two weeks, I felt miserable, and the effects of the above suddenly became a bit overwhelming. Then as I struggled to get back on track, I had my worse pollen allergy attack. That reduced me to a cotton ball. I wanted to claw out my eyes. My nose became a dripping faucet. One night, I tried the Neti Pot (I even watched the video to make sure I did it right). But that experience left me worst off than ever. Maybe I have some polyps in my nasal cavity or something because the homemade saline refused to succumb to gravity. That episode left my ears buzzing and my nose more choked up than ever. Undaunted, I did it on both nostrils and spent the night drowning in my nasal offerings. After a day's break, I bravely tested the Neti Pot's supposed magic again. Needless to say, I don't think I'm a good Neti Pot candidate. So till last night I couldn't sleep for the stuffed up nose, laryngitis, and uncontrollable coughing. (Thankfully my eyes are now behaving better.) Antihistamines of various ilk didn't help (my husband knew I was desperate when I resorted to those). And since I've lost my voice, I can only whisper... Yes, instead of focusing on the Lord, trusting in His timing and counting my blessings (there have been so many!) I've been having hopping from one miserable pity-party to another. BUT no, nothing is in vain. God is good and I'm thankful I can record one main lesson learned so far during this Lenten journey. God is not interested in my performance or productivity. Period. If I draw my comfort, peace and joy from my performance and how fruitful my day has been (and this includes the wonderful time I can spend quietly at His feet), then I'm being idolatrous. Anything that replaces the Lord as the source of joy is idolatrous. You see, I have been too hung up on what I can do for my family, my friends and even for God. Productivity in those areas always makes me happy and when my hands are tied, I invariably feel out of sorts. No, I should not draw my comfort, peace and joy from my performance in executing my duties or from my success in engaging in pleasurable activities. My comfort, peace and joy should come from what God has done for me in the finished work of Christ! When I'm honest with myself I wonder how God can actually love me! But He does. He drew me to Him so long ago and as I placed my faith in Jesus, He gave me new life. And today I need not replace my position in Him with what I think my position in life should be. God just loves me and I don't have to earn His approval. I don't have to perform. I don't have to be someone important. Even for Him. Nothing matters but that I'm letting Him conform me in the image of Christ. So the house is a mess. Homeschooling has seen better days. I could get fitter. Things could be more organized. I could bake my own bread again. And sprout again. And... But hey, there is no need to strive. “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest,” My Beloved reminds me today. “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” He assures me. “For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” He reminds me. So yes, no strife. Just peace, comfort and joy in Him and in His finished work on the Cross. And as I conclude this Lenten reflection, I wish you peace, comfort and joy in Him. And in Him only.
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(As and when I have the time I'll record some of my reflections here under “Lenten Reflections”) Recently, after the Lent Activities ebook went out, I've been receiving letters from various home school moms who shared their hearts with me. The common theme has been how they have been in their own “wilderness” and how they desire to enter the “Promised Land” but sin, disobedience and fear have kept them walking in circles. I hear them. My heart beats with theirs. We are so quick to judge, and even condemn the ungrateful and disobedient Israelites for not trusting God enough. Didn't they cross the Red Sea? Didn't God reveal His guidance through the pillar of cloud and pillar of fire? Didn't God help them with their first battle with the Amalikites? Didn't God sustain them? They had refreshing water and God sent them manna (and quail when they wanted meat.) Didn't God speak to them directly from Mount Sinai and then through Moses? Didn't they witness for themselves the glory, the majesty, the awesomeness and the providence of God? So what was their problem? Why did they complain incessantly? Why did they hark back to the past (for goodness sake...they wanted to go back to Egypt ?!!!) Why did they build, of all things, a golden calf (and with Aaron's blessings too!) to worship? When they were so close to reaching their Promised Land, fear and distrust overshadowed their faith, and tragically they had to pay the price for it. They had to walk in circles for 40 years... Even my children shake their heads when we read this portion of the Bible together. Their minds can't fathom why the Israelites were so silly and foolish. Dense. Ridiculous. Retrospective wisdom is easy. For aren't we like the Israelites? I know I am. Sadly. I complain. I am a slave to some bad attitudes. I have my own dark idols. Some parts of my life are controlled by fear. Trust in the Lord? I don't always do that... This season of Lent I want to move closer to the heart of God. I want to complain less, cast down known idols, and cease being so silly, foolish, dense and ridiculous. But I can't will myself to be all that I want to be. Need to be. In my own flesh I'm nothing. My attitude towards sin cannot be self-centered. It has to be God-centered. It's not so much victory I desire but a desire to please and obey the Lord. Victory is a by-product of obedience. This focused journey has begun... As I concentrate on living an obedient life, the joy of victory over sin will come. Won't you join me in this journey? Let me know if you will and we can pray for each other. Be blessed. |
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I thank each one of you who wrote to me personally to thank me for the Lenten Tree Activities ebook. I'm just so thrilled and happy it has blessed you and that it will help prepare your children for Easter (Resurrection Sunday). After doing the more popular activities through the years, I wanted something more original and more focused on the Lord. Yet I didn't want something that was too demanding because Lent is a relatively long season and I could see myself burning out if we did something more elaborate. It appears that many of you are in the same boat so I'm delighted to share this little ebook. I want to share parts of two emails I received this morning. (I've asked the writers' permission to quote them, so don't worry, if you write to me and I want to quote you, I'll ask for your permission first. :) The first is from Laura from Texas. She shares her family traditions which I thought were just precious. My daughter immediately said she wanted to do the Mite Jar when I shared with her what Laura wrote. A couple of other traditions we do each year are the Crown of Thorn wreath out of salt dough (pulling out a thorn--toothpick--every time a family member does an act of kindness) We also do our Mite jar activity for donating money to our church at the end of Lent. It is a small jar that is filled with 40 strips of paper with essentially math activities for our home--i.e. for every light bulb in the house, put $.05 in the jar; for each person in the family with brown eyes, put $.10 in the jar, everyone else put in $.05; for every pillow in the home, put $.05 in the jar, etc. Our four kids (6-10 yrs old) LOVE doing all of these, and it additionally strengthens their math skills! Then on Easter, we make resurrection rolls. I love incorporating the Lenten season into our family life, our Domestic church. I love that you pointed out that this is not just a Catholic tradition. I believe all Christians can benefit greatly from reflecting throughout the whole season--not just Easter...and become richly blessed by doing so. The second email I'm sharing comes from Tanis M. She has a great story to share. My story about Lent besides going to a more liturgical type church (Anglican and United) as a child/ youth, is from my mom who was delivered from smoking when I was about twelve. She had given up smoking for Lent and then regretted it and had no qualms complaining about it to God. It was a mini temper tantrum actually. It was totally by God’s power and there is no real physical explanation for it except she was honest with God and He saw fit to show His Lordship in her life. The craving and desire were overcome. She never touched another cigarette from the next morning on....He will not share His glory with another. Our efforts are like filthy rags. She gave God permission to affect her habits and though there is no power in the holiday ritual itself, we still serve a God of miracles. I bless Him for giving me such a mom. We’ve had our struggles to understand one another, but I am so thankful for the faith we share.
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So tomorrow is the beginning of Lent. Ash Wednesday. My daughter just scooped up some ashes from the fireplace and we carefully poured it into a ceramic bowl. Tomorrow we will begin our Lenten adventure. Using that bowl of ashes I'll explain to them the significance of Ash Wednesday. Of Lent. It's just a personal observation. My beloved home church doesn't mark Palm Sunday or conduct a Good Friday service so we just go straight to Easter Sunday. We do have a sunrise service at a little outdoor chapel before the Easter service, and that's always so lovely. Still I miss the communal build-up and preparation of the heart before that most glorious of Sundays... So my family observe Lent in some fashion at home. We want our children to anticipate Easter, to be more conscious of the passion of Christ...and to create some memories along the way too. And personally Lent is a season of soul-searching for me. It's hard to be a reflective home school mom. Each day melts into another. A never-ending cycle. Checklists of tasks await me at the crack of dawn. No time. No time... Lent allows me to withdraw into my own forty days of wilderness. Lent forces me to focus more on my spiritual life, whatever form it takes.... So yes, Lent makes sense... I hope you will join in this journey with me... Repentance. Grace. How we need them. Lent is a good time to rediscover them. |
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For two years now I had wanted to write an Easter devotional for my children that traced the last week of Jesus' life on earth. I'm so thankful I was able to finally put all my thoughts on paper this year and it is now ready. Then I had also wanted to do something special with my children every day of Lent (which starts on February 25th, Wednesday). So I came up with the Lenten Tree Chart that lets the children mark off every day of Lent by coloring on a fruit of the Tree. To get the Holy Week Devotions for the Family and the FREE Lenten Tree Chart and other Lent Activities ideas, visit my website. Have a blessed Lent, my friends. |
Posted in Spiritual Musings
Posted in Spiritual Musings
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Are there people who continually treat you unkindly or who refuse to accept you and your family? Are there those who despise you because you are homeschooling? Is there someone who mocks at your physical appearance? Is there someone seems to enjoy making snide remarks about your loved ones? Was there someone in the past who really did you wrong? Have you been unfairly judged? Have you been deceived? Are you undergoing a situation that is causing you much pain and sorrow, and your friends seem nonchalant about it? Most, if not all of us have experienced life's crucible of unfairness. Some of us more than others. We live in a sinful and imperfect world after all. But even as we teach our children that they have choices, we have choices too. We can choose to forgive or we can allow the pain to fester into bitterness and resentment. And anger. God wants us to forgive those people who have hurt us. In fact, He demands it. For some, that choice seems nigh impossible. A beloved childhood friend is undergoing a horrible time now. She and her husband of more than two decades separated on New Year's day, and within a month, he found someone who was happy to “share his dreams” (a too familiar situation). He professed to be a Christian before they were married but time revealed his true heart. She asked me tearfully why she had to forgive him when all he had given her the past two decades was pain, and more pain. And she anticipated more suffering to come. Yes, why should she forgive him? For one thing God tells us to forgive our enemies. He tells us to forgive others even as He has forgiven us. And He has forgiven us of much. When we forgive others, we obey God. We all know the blessings that come with obedience too. For another thing, if we don't forgive, we're effectively harming ourselves. By harboring resentment and bitterness, we are poisoning our body! Bottling anger releases toxins into our system. There is an old saying that goes something like what you are eating is not nearly as important as what is eating you. Anger, bitterness and resentment are deadly. They eat up our health, our joy, our peace. They suppress our immune system. Yes, life is not always fair. But we need not let it overwhelm us. God is greater than all our pain, all our concerns. For does He not know when a sparrow fall? Does He not clothe the lilies? Does He not hear and answer prayers? Indeed. If you are clinging on to some grudge now, be it big or small, let go. Besides trying to eat well, and seeking to live in a purer environment, let's begin from the inside. Our heart. And we can start by forgiving those who have wronged us. I know this may not be comforting to my grieving friend who so wants to be vindicated...but judgment belongs to the Lord. I pray that she will let the Lord take care of her future, and just move on. Dwelling on all the evil her soon-to-be-ex-spouse has done will not help her one iota. And for those of us who may not really understand the pain our friends or relatives are going through, let's at least show more grace towards their struggles. By so doing, we may help them in their own journey of forgiveness.
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Pascal, the great thinker and mathematician, had a simple yet profound prayer that I stick by my laptop. It encourages me when educating and discipling my children seem too high a calling for me; when gnawing self-doubts chip at my determination to persevere. It also reminds me to not get overly frustrated when another meal has to be prepared so soon after all the dishes are washed and put away. And the dryer beeps for the third time that day. The prayer goes: "Lord, help me do great things as though they were little, since I do them with Your power; and little things as thought they were great, since I do them in Your name." Nothing is too big or too small when we do it for God's glory (Col. 3:23). When we do everything in His name and for His glory, there is no room for pride, no room for low self-esteem (which really is another facet of pride). Indeed, there is no need to dicotomize the tasks we need to engage in to raise healthy, balanced and godly children who daily also require washing and feeding in the physical sense. In things 'great' and 'little' we just supply the willingness and God will supply the power. |
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I admire much of John Piper's writings. This is one good article about voting. Let Christians Vote As Though They Were Not Voting. Reading this article really encouraged me tonight as it reminded me that we shouldn't live like current and uncertain future events are here to stay. And everything that bothers or thrills me now is really transient. What bothers me now will not bother me when this world passes. What thrills me now, even my own delight with the Lord's goodness, is just a foreshadow of the real joy to come. So yes, tonight my heart is a little heavy. My dearest little girl (okay, she is 10 so she is not really little but you understand...) continues to fight with her asthma as I write. It has been hard on all of us. It has given me little precious sleep. And sometimes the worry gnaws at me. I think my face is freshly lined and my hair a shade grayer. But this episode too will pass. And it is futile for me to worry about all the "tomorrows" and all the "ifs". I'll do my best to help her along this journey, and well, I certainly can trust the Lord's control in this matter. If I can trust Him for my salvation surely I can trust Him with my daughter's health. And yes, vote by all means. In fact vote if you are able to. But really, don't over react when all is said and done. There really isn't any need to. The Lord is in control. Nothing happens without His approval first, whether it's the election results or my daughter's asthma episode. In God We Trust. |
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In between throwing four sets of stinky TKD uniforms into the wash and wondering how I could salvage the dessert in the oven for our Sunday after-church lunch guests tomorrow (I forgot the baking soda – something I never committed with this dessert before) and asking the Lord to once more forgive my sins (one of those downcast days when my past burdens needlessly weigh on me – and let me know if you NEVER EVER suddenly get struck by the gravity of your past though marvelously forgiven sins), I had an epiphany. And it came ringingly clear. I'm not just raising children. My goal is to see them become godly adults. My children (5 and 10) are not what I wish they were, now – perfectly obedient, loving, respectful, compassionate and diligent, and especially for my 10 year old – endued with a great attitude - but then neither is their currently contrite mother. But they do have a head start. Both their parents are Christians. Their parents want to walk in the light. They seek godly wisdom for their children's lives. My husband and I are certainly imperfect in our parenting skills, but “the Lord didn't make a mistake” (dh's favorite reminder to me) when He brought us together and gave us children with their unique propensities to raise. We just need a vision of them as godly adults, and then to press on. Daily we need to teach, exhort, encourage, praise, discipline and disciple them. The years will reveal what the days conceal. And if I live for each day, expecting wonderful outcomes and right responses much if not all the time, I'll be continually disappointed and discouraged. You know how some days can be very trying (I mean you have them, don't you?). So yes, press on we must, with the long-term view in sight. They are just children for this season. But we are raising them to be responsible, God-fearing, God-honoring adults. And the Lord is faithful to that end even as we are faithful in our parental responsibilites... Okay, now that I've recorded this insight (actually something I've already processed long ago but it really did come back afresh just now) I can go back to cleaning the kitchen and getting ready for tomorrow. Already the evening promises to be more relaxed. AS for the dessert, maybe I should just get a big tub of ice-cream. I know, I'll also make some eggless chocolate fudge to go along with it...that can be done tomorrow morning. Even as God is not finished with my wonderful offsprings, He is not through with me too. Praise God for His patience and His reminder to me to be patient with my children...and to enjoy this short but marvelous season... |
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Overheard in an Orchard Said the Robin to the Sparrow: Said the Sparrow to the Robin: - Elizabeth Cheney Anxiety, agitation, and apprehension. Like a circle unbroken I sometimes find myself trapped in this spinning existence. What does that reflect when I allow myself to be sucked into that kind of fretful swirl? Simply my lack of trust and reliance on the Lord. To be perfectly at peace and at rest seems but a dream then. Yet all the worrying has never made me a better wife, mother or person. It breaks the beauty of the day. It blinds me from simple joys. It cripples rather that strengthens my daily resolve to live for the Lord. And don't my children crave for more smiles when their mama discards her cheerful countenance and cloaks on foreboding thoughts instead? So when I find myself fretting away (or mindlessly opening the freezer for more chocolate chips – they somehow go together unless it's that time of the month), I remember....I recall...I bring to mind who I worship.... I worship the God of peace. Yes! Our God of peace can bless us with His peace; God's peace. And only the peace of God is worth pursuing. It starts when we let go of our anxieties and worries. And replace that “void” with the assurance that we can totally trust God. Indeed we can! Meditating on His Word and communing with our Father help the process a lot... So as I face the prospect of a new week...I'm going to let my mind come under His captivity. I'm going to live each moment and savor each experience with abandonment, under the shadow of His wing. I'm gonna fly! :) Have a carefree week ahead, my friends. |
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Its siren call can be a low buzz, a soft alluring voice, a steady beat or a pounding reminder of your unsatisfied needs. Sin kills. It wraps itself around your heart. It squeezes out the last drop of joy in you. It deadens your spirit. Sin needs to be addressed. And we can't do it alone. God is our refuge and help. He is our rock and strength. He forgives. He refreshes. But the noise of sin can be too loud. Too confusing. We need accountability.
Another day is here. This lovely fall dawn fills my soul with joy and hope. And I'm humbled. I'm not alone in my battle. I am accountable to not just the Lord. I have my husband. And he is accountable to me. It's not something I dare take for granted, this powerful transparency between us. No, we cannot take anything for granted, for sin is insidious... But as we daily commit ourselves to the Lord and to each other, we will overcome. And live...in the light.
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A lot of life has to do with preparing for death. No, I don't have a premonition of death but let me tell you, after spending a few weeks planning for our wills and talking and reviewing legalese with our lawyer, it was all I could do - taking a hard look at this earthly life and its transience. DH and I had wanted to get our wills done in a long while. We finally bit the bullet and called up a lawyer. That sure set the cogs in my head whirling. There are so many ifs in this life. The main one is if both of us go when the children are still minors. Who will take care of them? Educate them? Feed them? Love them? Ensure they continue to grow in the Lord? So choice of trustee and guardian has to be prayerfully made. Details of the trust will have to be set up. Then of course I cannot but help but think of all the stuff I've accumulated. Seriously, the children's guardian/s will have no space for a fraction of the "special" stuff I've stored away. Reality check. Declutter now, or someone might have a horrible headache. Of course I pray I'd be around for my grandchildren, but we don't know when the Lord will take us home. Meanwhile what sort of legacy do I want to leave behind? When I go to be with the Lord, what can I leave behind that will allow the children to understand what really is important to me? Precious to me? So even as school winds down (yeah, 16 more "official" days'), and even as I plan for our long awaited trip, I'm making lists. I'm "inventorizing", if not on paper in my head - things to keep, to let go, to give and to bequeath. I'm seriously wondering if my life has been lived well, if I will leave my children a legacy of deep faith and love for the Lord... Yes, life is a preparation of death. It starts with, "Are you saved? Do you know the Lord?" for after death comes the judgment. Can a person not want to be assured of his or her salvation knowing that death is inevitable? It boggles my mind how so many refuse to address the desperate and wild cries of their souls. Oh, dear reader, if you are not sure if you know the Lord today, please at least check out this link! And life is also preparation of death for while we are able and clear-minded, we want to prepare the groundwork for our children, that their needs will be taken care of should we pass on. We need to be prepared so they will not be left fumbling and confused. Without being morbid, we can also prepare them that as a family, we'll always be together. Someone has to go home to be with the Lord first, though. And the living can rejoice for while the body may die, the soul never dies. It lives on forever. And we'll all meet again in Heaven, our true home. So, if you don't have a will, I encourage you to make one. For your own peace of mind and for the love of your children. |
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The ladies' Bible Study was wrapping up. We shared prayed concerns. My left eye is not doing better! I blurted out. Recently its already puckered vision spiraled downwards and fear that my “good” eye would go that way sneaked into my heart. Then my mom. My dear precious mom who lives so far away. Her cervical spondylosis is disabling her. She is now in pain, and I am absent. My mom who has showered me with unconditional love ALL my life is in pain. My heart is in shards thinking about it. A dear lady closed us in prayer. She prayed for healing, if that is the Lord's will. She prayed for wisdom on the doctors' part. Then she prayed the developments in my life would draw me closer to the Lord. What a beautiful prayer. Ultimately, our bodies will decay, no matter what preventive measures we take. We can prolong the quality of our lives, but if there is no real intimacy with the Lord, everything is in vain. My bad “vision” reminds me to fix my eyes on the Lord. It helps me see people with love and not in judgment. Daily I choose to enjoy the beauty of God's creation (including my family!) rather than to focus on what's wrong with this world (the whole election process has not been good for my soul). My mother's pain makes my own daily chores a wonder to behold. Why, my fingers, my hands and arms, they work! Like I can run the vacuum cleaner so effortlessly. Housework is a daily dance of being joyful in the Lord. Not every time, but when I choose to. I have a choice. Yes, my heart is heavy, but it is also liberated! |
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Last night was the first time I visited this blog. Reading about the Davis family just broke my heart. Please be in pray for them. Life is too short and precious to be obsessed about trivial things. Savor your moments. Be thankful for dirty dishes. Love your children. Hug your husband. Trust God. Live for eternal treasures. Count your blessings. God is good. All the time. Even when we don't understand why He allows the Davis tragedy to transpire. May the Lord comfort that precious family. |
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Well, I've decided to take the 90-day Bible-reading challenge and as of Day 4, I'm 19 chapters behind. I'm supposed to have completed Genesis today. Big sigh, but this time round, I refuse to be discouraged. Even if I don't succeed in reading the Bible in 90 days, if I persevere, I'll finally get to Revelation. If it takes me twice or thrice as long, so be it. I'll still complete it. Little by little, I'll get there. Mile by mile is a trial; yard by yard is hard; but inch by inch is a cinch.
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My four-year old son has a great attitude. Each morning, when he wakes up, he flashes me the brightest smile (which never fails to melt my heart) and declares, "Today is the best day!" Now, my freshly-turned ten year old is not anything like that. With all her itches at night , poor girl, she usually wakes up unrefreshed and grouchy. Smiling the first thing in the morning is for her a monumental task unless I announce "No school today," or pop the rare chocolate chip in her mouth. (You should see how her lips slowly curl into a contented smile when it dawns on her what's in her mouth.) So, to her brother's eager pronouncement, she invariably responds, "That's not possible! Everyday cannot be the best day. There can only be one best day." So a little comical exchange will follow between the siblings. And of course I will intervene and assure my Josh that every day can indeed be the "best day" and remind my not very sunny-in-the morning girl that it is all right for her brother to make that daily proclamation. "He has a great attitude, you see." And he does, for when night time comes, unless he is very tired, he usually says,"Today was the best day. Tomorrow will be the best day too." I love it. And I pray he will continue to have that sunny and happy disposition; that joy of life and that confidence that life is great. And there is no problem mommy or daddy cannot solve. Of course when he is older, I hope he realizes that there is nothing God cannot solve. His parents have feet of clay after all. Wish you could have that kind of attitude? Well, as this year comes to a close, I realize my own attitude towards homeschooling and a few other areas of life needs some attention. Badly. While this year has been super in many ways, I know my general attitude has been, well, not good. That it was bad is to put it mildly. My patient husband, who knows me VERY well, confirms what I know all along. I need an attitude change. A big one. So I'm going to spend the next couple of days committing my life's outlook to God. He alone fully understands. He alone sees my weaknesses and motives. He alone knows my heart. And only He can change me, transform and renew me. Yes, I'm excited about 2008. Many tasks and goals to accomplish. But first things first. And that is inviting, begging the Lord to work in my hard heart. My cold attitude. No more holding back. No more reservation. Maybe, just maybe then, I will be more fruitful for Him. And like my little Josh, maybe I can confidently see every day as "the best day" , for every day is the day that the Lord hath made. Happy New Year! |
Posted in Spiritual Musings
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(Okay, I don't know why there are these weird white highlights on parts of my musing. They are not deliberate and I don't know how to get rid of them. Sorry if they are distracting!) As I study Genesis (in preparation for my Bible study with my dd) on this pretty Labor Day afternoon, the significance of the relationship between grace and righteousness hits home. Once more. Did you know that God's grace was evident even in the Old Testament? Go to Genesis. Read Genesis 6:1-8. That was what the world was like after the fall of Adam. Genesis 6:8 marks the end of that description by stating that “Noah found grace in the eyes of the Lord.” Now look at Genesis 6:9. “This is the genealogy of Noah. Noah was a just man, perfect in his generations. Noah walked with God.” Read these two verses again. Now try to recall what you have probably heard or taught in Sunday School. Or read in Bible story books. Hmm...something like this? Everyone in the world was wicked. They were haters of God. They did dreadful things. They displeased God. But out of the whole world, one man stood out. That was Noah. He loved God. He obeyed God. He was righteous and blameless. So He found favor in God's eye. No wonder God wanted to save him. Now why is that erroneous?
God chose Noah. (Genesis 6:8). And Noah's response was obedience. Look at verse 22. “Thus Noah did; according to all that God had commanded him so he did.” There is this wonderful relationship between grace and righteousness here. What you see here too are the elements of a covenant relationship – sin, judgment, grace, blessings, commands, obedience. Where there is blessing, there is also responsibility. The Covenant of Grace *involves God's initiative in salvation. That does not mean there is no responsibility on our part. There is both the grace of God and human responsibility involved in this relationship. And as I end my little study here, I'm just so thankful that God extended His grace to me in the first place. I don't deserve His grace and mercy. I don't deserve His love. But He wooed me and drew me to Him. How I love Him! My responsibility now is to daily obey Him.
*If you want to read more about The Covenant of Grace, go to this link. I don't belong to this church, but I think this article explains the principle of the Covenant of Grace very well.
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Posted in Spiritual Musings
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If you think you are having a bad day or week, go over to Kate's blog and encourage her. I love her sweet and humble spirit; her love for the Lord and her willingness to bear her daily trials with joy. She is such an encouragment to so many. Pray for her many needs and be encouraged at the same time. |
Posted in Spiritual Musings
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Tomorrow, I'm going to start on the 90-Day challenge. Did you know that if you read just twelve pages of the Bible a day, you can complete it in 90 days? Now, I think most of us read more than twelve pages of other reading material each day. Here is the schedule (you can start anytime) if you are interested. And if you want some accountability or if you want to join me on this exciting journey, let me know! Email me or leave a comment. I hope I can do it. My daughter is my inspiration. She completed reading through the Bible as a Christmas gift to Jesus last year. Then came January, she participated in the 90-Day challenge issued by our church. She's planning to start on another round tomorrow. So, it's going to be a Mother-and Daughter commitment when I begin tomorrow.
I'm also committed to reading through the Proverbs (one chapter per day), something I've been doing for a few years now. I love this and CANNOT skip this.
Then I'm also going through the Judah Bible Curriculum (JBC) as part of my daughter's daily Bible Study. Now how am I going to fit in everything?
This is my plan. Upon rising, read my chapter of the Proverbs for my devotions.
In between, find time for my SDS. This will also take at least 30 minutes. I can do this for hours if there is no interruption. I LOVE THIS!
After dinner, while the children spend time with dh, I'll review the JBC and plan for the next day. Then finish my rest of the 90 -Day challenge. This should take another 45 minutes, minimum.
I must fight distraction and the need to make another cuppa tea though.
So, what do you say. Wanna join me?
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Posted in Spiritual Musings
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Do you celebrate Easter? Do you get nervous about the name “Easter” because it began as a pagan holiday? Afterall the word “Easter” was derived from the Anglo-Saxon spring goddess Eostre. Well, don't! Real Christians celebrate the true meaning of Easter - the miraculous Resurrection of Jesus Christ. As long as the content is bibilical and pure, it doesn't matter if you celebrate “Easter” or “Resurrection Sunday”. That's what my family believes. Our language is replete with all kinds of pagan and mythological references anyway. So relax and don't get hung up by the name! :)
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Posted in Spiritual Musings
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My daughter is sitting for her SATs now as I write this. The worst thing for her about these tests is not that she cannot answer some of the questions, but that she misses us. Her little brother misses her too and this morning asked if I could also drop him off so he could be with her to comfort her. What precious children they are. This is one benefit of keeping them at home. They really enjoy and desire each other's company. They care for each other's needs and feelings.
If I could, I won't want my children tested at all. I know what I'm doing with them and I really don't need an external body to tell me where they are on the curve. At least not in the elementary years. I admit though that I'm a wee bit curious. Still, if our cover school hasn't stated that SATs are mandatory when the child is in the fourth grade, I would delay testing as long as possible. My daughter will be in fourth grade next year. Many of her friends have been doing the SATS since the second grade and she thought it might be fun.
Well, she had a little shock on the first day when it was time for her math. We only started semi-formal math early this year and maybe she's a grade behind (in the “formal” sense) so I wasn't too surprised. She left two pages out of ten undone and spent an inordinate amount of time over some problems while skipping others that she had attempted. What hit me though was this. When we told her in the evening it was all right to have had guessed at the answers (after all, that's just one exam strategy; you get a 25 % chance of getting it correct!), she was appalled. To her that didn't seem right. You mean it's all right to pretend you know the answer if you don't? I can't do that! Oh, my husband and I were touched by her response. In so many ways, she is still so untouched by the world. She has always been honest. What am I teaching her when I tell her to “just guess”? To play the game of chance? To hope that lady luck will be with her? I have to think a bit more about this. This thought has never occurred to me.
I was brought up in an exam-oriented country and to this day, I STILL have nightmares about not being prepared enough for my exams. I guess I want my children to be spared of those experiences. Still, the real world demands that we have to prepare for all kinds of tests, academic or otherwise. So sheltering her from the hardships of having to be “tested” is not the answer.
I'm very glad though that when it comes to real tests, tests that the Lord gives us, we can have FULL confidence that God will be our strength. He is always with us. With God it is not just a 25% chance that He will see us through whatever storm we may go through. It's 100% of the time. Now, isn't this a reason to be happy today? Be blessed!
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Posted in Spiritual Musings
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It seems such a pity that the celebration of Christmas seems to overshadow Easter (Or Resurrection Day) when the latter is the most significant event in history (His Story)! To help you and your children center your thoughts more on the Lord, the "Life -Giver", I highly recommend Katherine Loop's wonderful Easter Devotional. I have a copy of it and my husband and I can't wait to read it to our children during the Holy Week (Palm Sunday through Resurrection Day). This devotional also has instructions for a simple but meaningful craft idea (a Flower Garden!) that your children can engage in after the devotions. The "garden" itself will serve as a reminder of Jesus who came to give us life most abundantly! If you don't already have something just for family devotions during the holy Week, you will appreciate this book!  |
Posted in Spiritual Musings
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I admit that each time that lady knocks at my door, I give her a welcoming smile. She then passes me yet another tract or book or magazine. And I accept them with a thank you. Most of the literature go into the trash can after I've flipped through them. Some have delightful pictures and I put them aside for possible projects when we need to cut and paste pictures and photos. Some have good sound advice about parenting. Now, this has gone on for two years. She knows our family are Christians but she keeps coming. She even knows my name. Sometimes she has another friend along. Each time I marvel at her faithfulness. I like her, and I think we could be good friends, if only... Usually when she comes a knocking, I'm in the middle of something - cooking, teaching, cleaning....BUT I think it is time... The next time she comes, I 'll be prepared. I'll put aside everything I'm doing and talk to her. Not about kids or the fact that we homeschool. No, I will not hold her for long theological discussions. But I can spend five minutes witnessing to her about the fullness of Jesus Christ, the second person of the Godhead. I can lovingly point to her what the Bible says about my wonderful Savior. I can even use her "Bible" which she carries with her all the time to point her to the logical conclusion that Jesus is the Alpha and the Omega. If you are reading this, please say a prayer of courage for me. I'm not sure when she'll come again. Usually every three months.And if you too are facing JWs knocking at your door, you might want to take note of the following tips. |
Posted in Spiritual Musings
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It was just a small spelling bee conducted by our cover school. 15 participants for grades 1-3 and around the same number for the older kids. The winner among the older group gets to compete in the district bee. My dd decided she wanted to be in the bee for the 1-3 graders so I signed her up last Thursday. She seemed pretty nonchalent about it over the weekend and even this morning. Good, I thought. I just wanted her to enjoy the experience and not take it too seriously. But as we belted up in the van to ride to the school, she asked if I would be disappointed if she didn't win. "Oh, no, sweetie. Just do your best!". "But it's all right to want to win, right?" she asked. "Sure," I told her, "no one joins a competition with hopes of losing. You enter a competition to win. But if you don't, as long as it's your best, it's fine. You do everything to glorfy God." So we prayed for her to do her best. I admit I was a bit nervous for her as she had never participated in anything competitive (just recitals, and well, perhaps a few writing competitions, but those don't really count). Well, it ended that she came in second. She had a certificate, a ribbon, and some game thingy. And she was jubilant. She was beaming and smiling. I was very happy for her, but I couldn't help noticing some really despondent little boys and girls who had to leave the stage after a misspelt word. There was even a little girl who was all curled up outside the library after everything was over. She was holding her certificate of participation and bless her precious heart ,was sobbing away. I sat down beside her and stroked her pretty hair. She looked up and sobbed hard. Then she said she so wanted to win the first prize. I admired her goal. And I just hurt for her. Well, we went for ice-cream to celebrate my dd's second prize. Then when we reached home, my dd said again she was so happy. And she asked, "Would you have been disappointed if I didn't win any prizes?" Now what gave her the idea that I would be disappointed in the first place? Once more I assured her. But that whole bee thing got me about thinking about the Christian race we run every day. Do we run with that heavenly prize in mind? Are we serious about the race? Do we allow earthly things to weigh us down? Do we weep, like that little girl wept when she didn't get the prize she so desired, when we know we have disappointed our Lord? Oh, to aim for more and more holiness day by day. Oh, to seek more Christlikeness and greater service for the Lord all the time, and to keep that goal firmly set before us! 13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, 14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13,14 This heavenly prize will be even more rewarding and wonderful than winning the Spelling Bee. Even at the national level. For we are talking about a prize eternal.
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Posted in Spiritual Musings
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Happy New Year! Have a God-filled, joy-filled, peace-filled 2007!!! So it's 2007. We are still trying to get our time capsule (to be opened in 2017) together, LOL. The following hymn sums up the desires of my heart for many years. It will be my theme song for 2007. I just love the first two lines. Each time I feel the repugnant stain of selfishness and self-righteousness seeping from my heart and spreading to my head and lips, I find rest and peace reflecting on these lines. Wow, a heart that is constantly true and clean! How I want that! And to have a heart that is sunlit with not a cloud between! Oh, only Christ can make us pure and true! I'm just so thankful I am a Christian today. Are you? :) A Heart Like Thine I want, dear Lord, a heart that's true and clean; I want, dear Lord, a faith that looks to Thee! I want, dear Lord, a hope that's steadfast and sure; By George Jackson |
Posted in Spiritual Musings
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I hope all of you had a meaningful Christmas. We had our Christmas devotions and then we drove to my in-laws for a scrumptious Christmas breakfast. A new tradition! It's usually lunch. I didn't make my usual “Happy Birthday Jesus” cake this year – something we usually have for breakfast on Christmas day (a real treat as we just don't eat cake for breakfast!). We brought home too much left-over desserts. It will be nice to eat normally again soon. Maybe after my daughter's little birthday party on Wednesday.
We give our children each three gifts for Christmas. The first one is what they really love. In my daughter's case, she had her dream dress from Vision Forum. The old-fashioned kind with a bonnet and an apron (wish I could sew that for her myself). My son had his dream garbage truck. He had wanted that for more than 6 months and we actually had it sitting in the closet for that long. The second gift is usually something that require the use their hands or mind. My daughter had a set of biographies of famous people, and my son had a cool drill set. The third gift is something that will help them spiritually. My son had a CD of Bible stories and my daughter had another book – a character-building kind for girls (I love such books!). As my dd's birthday is tomorrow, she will get more gifts but since she wasn't inundated with gifts from us or relatives, I think she'll be fine. I am bad about not letting them have too much. Or maybe I'm good about it. I put away stuff my mom and sister send (with their permission) and then gradually unveil the gifts to the children. I don't want them to take gifts for granted. And it's nice to have little presents in January. It is so sad though that so many of my friends are hurting this Christmas. For one friend, her husband has decided to leave her. He left her a note on the eve of Christmas eve. Well, it has been a horrible marriage from the start, but still, divorce is always painful. Another friend had to undergo lumpectomy a few days ago and the results are not out. One just called to wish me Merry Christmas and to let me know her mom had stroke a week ago. Her daughter who is 18 has also decided to move to another state to finish her high school there. She moved in September. Her dad lives there but she isn't close to her dad. She basically wants more freedom. So this friend, who has physical challenges herself, is just wiped out emotionally and physically. Another friend's mom passed away on Christmas eve and someone's uncle took his own life, also on Christmas eve. I spoke to yet another friend who shared about how a church, pastored by our dear friend, had gone “liberal”. I can go on...pain, hurt, anger, betrayal. In the midst of all this, it's so good to remember that God sent His only Son more than 2000 years ago to redeem us. We cannot really appreciate Christmas till we appreciate how much we need the Lord. And in the midst of pain and hurt, how thankful I'm for my precious Lord and Savior. He truly was and is the greatest gift to us. I pray that many who live in darkness without Him today will be attracted to Him, and His complete work on the Cross. I'm glad that all my hurting friends I mentioned above know and love the Lord! Well, time to join my family now...have a great rest of the day. May His presence be very real and sweet in your life... |