Posted in Issues and Encounters

I ran across another version of the "socialization question" recently.  I was asked by a lady, considerably older than myself, about "shared experiences" that my daughter would miss enjoying with other children.

When I asked this lady to be more specific, she used the example of same-age peers discussing how they "thought the math teacher, Mrs. Smith, was mean."  

I'll have to admit, my response didn't win any points with her, for I said, "And how is that a positive experience I want my daughter to enjoy, exactly?" 

For once, the witty rejoinder at the right moment.  My error was in opening my mouth and uttering it.

However, I recently saw this "shared experiences" concept in action.  My daughter and two friends bumped into each other in a public place.  Each child attends a different school - one public, one private, one homeschooled.  The first friend has recently "discovered" that we homeschool (this is the K and 1st grade set here, for what it's worth) and explained this to the second friend.

So, the second friend asked my daughter, "Well, what do you study at home?" And Kate describes our geography reading, our phonics book, our writing workbook, and the math program.  Then they all start comparing writing handbooks (ours has lines with two colors; mine has pictures), moving on to math workbooks (mine has blocks we use; ours has a dog on each page).

Shared experiences - though from totally different realms in each case.

Exactly what adults do when they don't work at the same place or live together and have to make small talk in social situations.  They find what they have in common and talk about that.

But something that seems common among homeschooled children is their ability to socialize with people of all ages and backgrounds, not just age-group peers.

My daughter can just as easily converse with our elderly neighbor as with her dance class friends.  She is as content attending a wedding reception as she is a friend's birthday party.  Admittedly, she'll be more excited by the party, but she won't fuss over the reception being an "adult" event and will look forward to the experience, and the cake!

There are many facets to the socialization issue.  Each family who chooses to homeschool will have to decide for themselves what this question means to them and how to handle it.

Meanwhile, it helps to keep a sense of humor and one's tongue in cheek.  Or, in my case, a lock on my tongue!