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Apr. 28, 2009 -

sadly needs help with her facebook addiction.......

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Apr. 28, 2009 - life

There was a time in my life were I felt like my world could not get any better, I had a wonderful family who loved the Lord, I could feel God in and around my life and everything thing seemed to spring into something beautiful.  I was 9 when I laid down my own personal rules for my life and were to draw the line on certain things and at age 9 decided I was going to save my first kiss for the special someone God had for me, I laid out the ground works for how a relationship in Gods eyes should be and I was going to stick to it.  growing older and older, each passing year came a new challenge and hardship.  I reached a point in my life were I was doubting my belief's and what God wanted for me.  My life hit a down hill  were  two of my uncles passed, my brother was leaving for the Army, my other brother was away for one year in Russia as a missionary, my eldest brother was off and about making a living for himself with work and playing music, my parents relationship wasn't the best, I started college which was the biggest step I felt I was taking, all the problems of my family and surrounded by death and all the hurt that kept on coming seemed to fall on me, crushing me from every which angle, all that emotion I had inside me..I kept bottled up and didn't feel like I had anyone to go to and spill it all out..I was sad at God for all my troubles.  I stopped caring for a portion of my life, until I found someone who seemed to care, he was nice, polite, a christian, and was human.  I told myself I didn't date, but in the back of my mind I was thinking, who cares, my life can't get any worse and I actually feel good when talking with him.  I blinded myself and  I got to attached and thought I fell in love with this guy.  the only problem I didn't see was that I was setting myself up for more pain.....after months I felt like the freindship/relationship was  just another burden to me.  that small bit of happiness i had at the beginning quickly faded leaving me with an empty joy...I tried to smile and find something to be happy about, but nothing seemed to bring me to true happiness. I wanted to be loved and I thought I had found it, but it was just a lie.  my brother saw what was happening and sat down to talk it over with me, though instead of giving me brotherly wisdom, he brought God into the picture and read to me from scripture. I felt refreshed and like someone pulled the blind folds off my eyes.   I ended the relationship and felt like I broke my heart in a million pieces.  I was mad at myself and no one else because of my choices I was the one that shattered my heart.   I started reading the bible everyday and felt and new joy and peace over my life. :)  I could feel the love that God poured out into my life and I felt that loneliness fade away.  I had found what I was searching for, a true and lasting love that would never hurt me and would care for me forever and love me no matter what, and I found it in God's arms!  I was searching for something that could not be found anywhere else but by looking up and looking in the bible.  I regret how I put my heart up for anyone to take, but I do forever thank God that I saved myself and didn't not give my lips and anything else away.  God continued to work in my life and mold my heart into what he wants it to be.  He brought me a godly and wonderful and enspring friend into my life!  we are so much alike in every single way!  we are like sisters and I am forever thankful to my Lord for sending me what I needed, which was a friend who would be there for me no matter what and could share God with and see how He works in our lives.  My life hit a down hill, but that was not the end of the road, I needed a wake up call and now my life continues to climb the upward hill of grace God gives us.  my life is so not perfect and I know that on my journey through life it will have its bumbs, but I know my eyes are fixed on God and He is has my past, my present and my future in His glorious hands.  my heart reaches out to those girls who are going through a tough time in their life.  I can say that their is nothing on this earth that will ever  fill the void in your life and make you feel good all the way from the inside out but God's lasting love.  its all you ever need.

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Apr. 28, 2009 -

my uncle went in for a triple bypass today..praying that the Lord keep his healing hand upon him and keep him safe

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Apr. 28, 2009 - Nothing can seperate us from God.

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Apr. 28, 2009 -

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Apr. 28, 2009 -

Romans 12:1-2
I beseech you therefore,
brethren,
by the mercies of God,
that you present your bodies a living sacrifice,
holy,
acceptable to God,
which is your reasonable service.
And do not be conformed to this world,
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind,
that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

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Apr. 27, 2009 -