Since I rarely post to this blog, I wonder if I am lazy, time-crunch, disinterested, or just not introspective enough to blog much?  I think I'm plenty introspective, but maybe reticent to share online?  I don't know.  I would love to have the habit of blogging but I am not happy with the look of the page and I don't know how to change it, nor do I know how to post photos.  If I could figure out how to do those things, I think I would blog more often.  It would be much more fun!

Last night I went to a mom's night out event at Mary's.  The speaker was another mom of seven who shared her experiences with juggling several students.  I learned a lot, and was confirmed in a lot.  I *know* all the answers, but it helps so much to hear another mom say it out loud.  I came away encouraged, feeling that I have essentially nothing to complain about regarding my children, homeschooling, or my husband.  It's nice to feel so blessed!!  My husband is wonderful and I am thankful for this little reprieve in life, feeling that things are going well.  I am a pessimist (realist) by nature and don't expect things to flow smoothly for long.  Maybe that is why I blog rarely?  Only when things are going well? 

Even though I have been homeschooling officially since 1996 and truly since my first child was born 15 years ago, I don't have any burning need to "share" with other homeschooling moms what I have learned or what my opinions are about various subjects within the homeschooling world.  If God brings a mom to me who is asking questions, then I gladly offer myself to her, but in general, I am not up to offering my views.  Selfish?  Maybe.  Scared?  That's more like it.  I'll get over it.

I do have an "article" floating in my mind, though, and I think I will rough-draft/brainstorm it here.

Last night some moms were asking how to get their children to not bicker, to not fight, to do their school work without serious intervention, etc.  I admit I don't have all the answers, but a lot of the time I was wondering why the subject of first-time obedience and spanking wasn't obvious.  I wonder why it seemed that their husbands are not involved in the running of the household, at least as "the law" - unseen as he may be during the day?  Husbands weren't mentioned (except once, and I am heartened to say it was on the subject of spanking), and the wives seemed truly discouraged with their situations. I felt sorry for them but kept thinking how "behind" they were in terms of training/discipline of their precious children.  I thank God for His word, which is abundantly clear on child training.  I am thankful to God for willing vessels (parents) who have gone before us and written books on the specific how-tos of training.  I am thankful that He made my husband and myself united and determined to do our part in the raising of our children. 

Hopefully, I am not giving the impression that we don't have problems or "issues."  We do.  Just yesterday I was crying to my husband about my feelings of inadequacy in regards to my mothering/homeschooling.  Last night confirmed for me that God is here, we are not in dire straits, and that the sin of comparing (even if just to my imagined "ideal") is worse than anything I might be neglecting in my home.  I'm thankful for the mom who shared herself with us.  I'm glad I went.  But I still feel this nagging to say or write something truly helpful.  It will be challenging, yes.  But, for Christians, don't we want to run to God with our problems?  Not just in prayer and tears with our struggles (though He, of course, wants us to do that), but with hearts ready to find the answers in His word, hearts *willing* to do what is written there?  What has happened to the church?  Why do moms have to come to a mom's night out looking for such obvious answers?  Everyone is a sinner, we all have children who sin and we parents all sin (though we always choose to sin, it is not something we do without our own will involved).  But... but, why is it that now when I go to a MNO event, I am not hearing questions about what to do with the toddler while we do phonics with our first-grader, or how to help my child understand reducing fractions, or how to get dinner on the table on time, I am hearing things like, "How do I get my child do what I want?"  Like not look out the window and comment on the hummingbird constantly?  If my children talk about unrelated things during our school time, I tell them we can talk about that later and if they bring it up again, they are "in trouble."  They know so very well that what I say, I mean, that they don't bring it up again. 

Proverbs 22:15 -- Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of discipline will remove it far from him.

I think the reason I hesitate to say anything about child discipline in these meetings is because it seems ridiculous to state the obvious.  If spanking is to be reserved for tantrums and extreme misbehavior, is it any wonder the behavior is allowed to become so extreme?  I strongly disagree that "learning disabilities" have anything to do with misbehavior, except with something like autism or some other extreme situation.  These parents seem to have "control" over certain situations and behaviors but not with others.  When spanking has "worked" with a particular issue, isn't it obvious that the child is capable of being trained in all things?  I fail to understand why the parents don't see what appears to be so clear.

My children are normal children.  They have bad attitudes, argue, want to have their own way, etc., but, and I stress this:  They do not challenge my or my husband's authority.  We are not at a loss when it comes to any behavior!  We have to take the time and emotional energy to train, but the children respond.  Immediately.  They may fail again, but their consciences are developed to the point that they don't want to be out of fellowship with their parents.  This started very very young, like at one year old! 

I know the anti-spankers are trying to find my address so they can send out child services to protect my children from "abuse" (their perceptions), but when the Bible ceases to be the first and final authority and teaching on all matters pertaining to life and godliness, then we see sweet, dedicated, but confused mothers asking what seems to me to be very obvious.

Is it their fault?  Not entirely. We, as Christians, have the responsibility to know our Bibles, regardless of how weak our pastors are and how inept and negligent they are at actually teaching the Bible, especially in critical "daily" areas (like child training and our responsibility to our children).  I feel sorry for women whose husbands are not teaching them and not learning and practicing for themselves the teachings of the Words of Life.  I feel sorry for the men who have been taught that women are so strong and don't need them, so they have no motivation to step in and actually "be the man."  I feel sorry for these men who truly *want* to live a life that is pleasing to the Lord, as evidenced by their working long hours to support their families so their wives can stay home and homeschool the children but who are wiped out by the time they get home from work and they need their sanctuary by then and the children don't "get it" that Daddy is in charge and they better shape up and obey Mommy, OR ELSE!

My dear husband was saying, just yesterday, that he doesn't think God meant for women to have to bear such a burden as homeschooling several children, keeping everyone fed (and we know how many steps that takes to accomplish), plus everything else, which is a whole lot).  That the extended family's support is essential to the smooth and healthy functioning of a household, especially one in which homeschooling is taking place.  So why do we homeschool then, since we have no such support?  The same reason I stay home and don't go out and "contribute" to the family by working a wages-paying job and why we have seven children and not the standard one or two.  We all know the reasons; they don't need to be restated here.  This is long enough already (remember, this is brainstorming and a rough draft!).

If we have chosen a life with built-in burdens, doesn't it make sense to consciously eliminate whatever other burdens we have the power to change?  Proper discipline/training of our children is one such way to ensure that at least one area in our lives will bring buckets of joy to us weary, haggard, stressed-out, but oh so blessed mothers.