Posted By Gena Suarez, The Old Schoolhouse Magazine
My friend, Kim, has a saying on her Facebook, "A woman's heart should be so lost in God, that a man has to seek Him in order to find her." But this generation seems to be lost to Facebook and their cellphone making it way too easy not only to find her but everything about her too. The combination has made any rules of engagement (pun intended) obsolete.
Once upon a time — in what we might think of as the “Happy Days” era — courtship was governed by a set of guardrails. Potential partners generally met within the context of larger social institutions: neighborhoods, schools, workplaces and families. There were certain accepted social scripts. The purpose of these scripts — dating, going steady, delaying sex — was to guide young people on the path from short-term desire to long-term commitment.
Over the past few decades, these social scripts became obsolete. They didn’t fit the post-feminist era. So the search was on for more enlightened courtship rules. You would expect a dynamic society to come up with appropriate scripts. But technology has made this extremely difficult. Etiquette is all about obstacles and restraint. But technology, especially cellphone and texting technology, dissolves obstacles. Suitors now contact each other in an instantaneous, frictionless sphere separated from larger social institutions and commitments.
As a parent, we've encouraged our young adults to establish appropriate guardrails which will help them navigate the temptations that are ever before their eyes. But it isn't easy for them or us. We understand the traps that lay before them that could derail their hopes and dreams, but frequently our young people only see another "friend" to add to their growing list.
In the "Happy Day's era as Brooks identifies it, a young man thought longer before he reached for a phone and called a girl. More importantly, the ring of the phone and one-side of the conversation were heard throughout the household. Now, the instantaneous access to a new friend through cell phones makes it easy, very private, and speeds up the courtship process. Add in social networking sites like Facebook and young adults quickly learn what their new friend's favorite food, music, song, and a whole lot more before the first date. They become emotionally bonded and "in a relationship" before parents and others in their social sphere know they even exist.
Even parents like us, who have encouraged our children not to commit to a long-term relationship until they are ready for marriage are struggling how to navigate these waters. The only "script" seems to be written by the next generation as they go along, eliminating many safeguards that prevented heart break or at least softened the blow.
God said it was not good for man to be alone, so He created woman and said it was very good. We created technology that has become our constant companion and what is happening to our generation because of it isn't so good.
The greatest man-made invention, in my opinion, isn't the steam or gasoline engine, or the computer, or even airplanes. I think it's the mattress. The kind the would make Goldilocks very happy, not too hard, not too soft, but just right.
I'm incredibly fond of my bed, made up of a mattress. If I no longer had a computer I wouldn't cry. If flight became a thing of the past I wouldn't worry. If I had to start walking everywhere I would probably grumble and whine, but I would get used to it. However, if I lost the use of a good mattress, I don't think I'd ever get over that.
You may think that I'm a hard-core blogger, but I put more time and effort into being a napper. Sleeping at night is only intensive training for my napping, and like a runner after a good, long run, I find it to have been hard work but well worth it--it gives me a rush. It can be exhilarating and then my body is ready for a good nap to recuperate.
Before the modern bed was invented, people had to sleep on poky straw or feathers. Quite a problem for those with allergies and deadly for those with asthma. Before that it was soft dirt or hard dirt, but I doubt there was ever any "just right" dirt. That's why the bears lived in a house and slept in beds. It wouldn't have been the same story if Goldilocks had wandered into a cave and tested three different bear wallows.
I completely and totally love my bed and all of the cozy comfort that it has to offer. It's just fills my heart with joy to crawl under the covers and snuggle down. Waking up in the morning is most painful. At least I have naps to look forward to.
To whoever invented the modern mattress, I am truly grateful. I wouldn't be half the napper I am now without it.
Prov. 27:17 – “As iron sharpens iron, so one man [family] sharpens another.”
When you began your homeschool adventure, where was it that you went to ask questions, get answers, find the camaraderie of many shoulders to cry on and find out that your child wasn’t a freak because he was having trouble with his nine times-tables?Where was it that you could count on someone with experience to be there for you?
Does “support group” ring a bell to anyone?
I hate to say it, but in many areas support groups are going the way of snow in summer-time…they seem to be melting away and fading into the atmosphere.And I say, “what a shame!”
It’s come to my attention that many of our precious experienced homeschoolers are starting to drift away from attending their area support group meetings.Do they feel that they have out-grown them?
Look at it this way:if I take two pieces of rusty, dull iron – I have two pieces of rust, dull iron!JBut if I rub them together, something great happens; they start to change.They become a little sharper, they become a little brighter and shinier.They become something usable.Iron can’t sharpen iron unless there is friction between the two…they have to meet together.
As I asked you in the beginning, think about when you were a new homeschooler and your child just wasn’t catching on to a concept and, at your wit’s end, you went to your homeschool support group and started asking around for help.Lo and behold!There was a wonderful, experienced mom there who had actually “been there, done that”!You went home, tried her advice and it worked!
Now…think of this:A new homeschool mom, full of hopes and dreams and fears comes to your homeschool support group.Her child just isn’t catching on to a concept and she’s at her wit’s end; and after coming to your support group she starts asking around for help.Lo and behold!Does she find it from you…OR is this one of those nights when you decided you just didn’t want to go tonight?After all, what more do YOU need to learn about homeschooling since you’ve done it for so long?
Well, what if the reason you are to STILL attend your group has changed?What if it’s now a ministry?What if the reason that new homeschool mom leaves the meeting a little sadder and a little more fearful and discouraged is because YOU weren’t there to answer her questions the way someone was there for you?
Isn’t it time for us to be there for a new generation of homeschoolers?Isn’t it time for us to share our experiences, our triumphs, our joys and even our failures with the new crowd?Isn’t that part of our Titus 2 duty?Did the Lord really make you a part of your group JUST so you could get a newsletter, go to gym or co-op or field trips, find out about curriculum sales and legislative updates?I don’t think so.
This is a new season in our lives and an opportunity to shine as examples of experienced homeschool moms!
Let’s not be a part of the “me, me, me” crowd…we’re past that.Let’s be the Lord’s hands and feet and minister to our sisters and their families and ease some of those fears and build some dreams!After all, a long time ago someone cared enough to be there for you.Now it’s your turn.
Posted By Gena Suarez, The Old Schoolhouse Magazine
At a homeschool convention last year, another vendor and I struck up a conversation. He had a lot of energy but seemed a bit uptight; however, he readily admitted that he felt totally out of place because he didn't homeschool and this was definitely not his "typical convention." Not really interested in finding out what his "typical convention" was like, I smiled and assured him that we all knew he was out of place the minute he walked in the vendor hall, but we're a polite group and so we didn't point or stare as we talked about him to each other. He grinned and relaxed a bit.
"Obviously, you're a pretty direct person," He said. "So I was wondering, how does a guy who knows nothing about homeschooling sell his product to homeschoolers?"
Ignoring the fact that this out of place "greedy capitalist" was there just to make a profit, I chuckled and asked him, "Why do you think homeschoolers would even want to buy your product if you know absolutely nothing about us?"
He didn't seem to want to answer that, so I continued, "Get to know us a bit and you'll figure out it's not that hard to sell to us. We're pretty frugal but can be gullible in the right circumstance with a promising product, especially at a homeschool convention."
"Fair enough." He replied. "Then I'd like to show you my stuff and see what you think. But first there's one thing I've been wondering about homeschoolers for quite a while now."
"Oh, and what is that?"
"Why do you homeschoolers have so many kids?"
"Umm, gee, maybe it's because we have more exciting things to do than watch Jay Leno after the kiddos go to bed?!?" (Okay, I didn't really say that but I did think it.)
Instead, I politely tried to explain that for some of us homeschooling isn't just an educational choice but a life decision based on a belief that children are as a blessing from God. He wasn't getting it and I was getting hungry so the conversation quickly died of natural causes.
If I ever run into him again, however, I'm sending him over to Ethan Demme (of Math-U-See fame) who gives a much more thoughtful and complete answer to the question, How do I reach the homeschool community? His post is directed at politicians but he starts from the same premise that you have to know something about us, past and present, in order to reach us.
As a homeschool grad and marketing guru, Demme provides an excellent round-up of information and resources to understand this growing but changing movement of homeschool radicals who actually believe they can teach their children at home and live to blog about it. Check it out and keep in handy if you ever run into my vendor friend at your state homeschool convention.
(Note to Demme: Please add a paragraph on fecundity and homeschoolers, thanks in advance.)
~Answered prayer...I have been praying about something for a long time. This weekend I finally got the fact that I was standing in the way of God answering my prayer in His way. I kept trying to fix/solve the problem. Within hours of surrendering it to the Lord, He answered my prayer in a great way.
~Great husbands.....my is the best!
~Grandparents....We had a fun time with Grandparents at our Keeper's Grandparents luncheon.
~My dog Belle....She is such a great dog and she likes me best!
SpellQuizzer is a spelling program that helps kids learn their spelling and vocabulary words. SpellQuizzer is spelling software for children that need help learning their spelling and vocabulary words. The SpellQuizzer web site has pre-made downloadable spelling lists that you can download and use with SpellQuizzer. ~SpellQuizzer.
A couple of weeks ago, I was contacted by Dan over at SpellQuizzer and asked if I would be willing to review this new software. It was an honor to be asked and I was certainly eager to do so. I really didn't know what to expect, but my initial hope was that the program wouldn't take a four year degree to understand!
I am pleased to say that it did not! From download to first use took only moments and SpellQuizzer was very simple to use. However, don't let the simplicity fool you, this is one powerful tool! My children get tired of writing and rewriting their spelling lists. SpellQuizzer allows for a little variety. They are able to type their spelling words using verbal cues that YOU create. All that is needed to use this software is an inexpensive computer microphone.
In a nutshell, you will take your child's spelling list and record them in the SpellQuizzer program. Say it, use it in a sentence and then repeat it if you'd like. Your child will then have the opportunity to type the word into the space provided. Further information can be found on the SpellQuizzer site.
I like this program for several reasons but mostly because it is another tool that I can use to reinforce my children's spelling words without making them write them each and every day.
Now for the contest:
SpellQuizzer is willing to award a FREE copy of the software and user license to the winner of this contest!!! (Thank you Dan!) Add a comment to this entry for your chance to win. Post on your blog about this contest and then come back and leave a second comment with the link to your post for a second chance to win. The contest ends at midnight, on Sunday November 15, 2009 and the winner will be drawn at random using Random.org. The winner will be contacted on Monday!
Outside my window...grey & over-cast. A cold front moving in after our 2nd Indian Summer. But that's OK...it's fall, after all. :-)
I am thinking...that I need to get ready to leave. My DD#2 & I are going to lunch w/my mom.
I am thankful for...still having a warm house, cars & not missing a meal during my DH's layoff.
From the kitchen...lunch out w/my mom this afternoon; possibly pasta & sauce for supper.
I am wearing...jeans, & a red, pink & white shirt.
I am reading...sermon notes.
I am hoping...things will go well w/my mom while we're out. She's not a happy woman & it can wear on us.
I am creating...a peaceful home.
I am hearing...radio, DD#2 in the shower, a neighbor's leave blower.
Around the house...laundry, dusting, running sweeper, dust-mopping kitchen & bathrooms.
One of my favorite things...a hot mug of Hazelnut or Vanilla Biscotti coffee on a cold, dark morning.
A few plans for the rest of the week...household chores, taking DD#2 to/from work, praying for miracles.
Here is a picture thought I am sharing with you...
This is the Collins Schoolhouse in 1854. This was a working schoolhouse until the 1940's. The family who now owns it has hired 2-3 retired teachers who now 'teach school' for school & homeschool field trips; an entire day just like in the 1800's. When our girls were little you homeschool group went there - it was great - the kids dressed up, took lunches in a pail or basket, they drank from the well, played old-fashioned games, the school was heated by the Franklin stove, they worked from McGuffey Readers on their slates, make bookmarks. This was also a year when we were working through "The Priarie Primer" unit study, so it was awesome!
The life of a homeschooling mom of 4.
Loving the life God has given you, homeschooling, growing in the word, letting God lead and me follow, dying to self. Who would have thought I would grow into someone I thought a few years ago was a wacko!!
