My first children were relatively mainstream.. you know see the Dr for 9 months and he doesn’t show up to deliver.. so with my third, I decided to use a midwife. What a difference, and she was there the whole time I was in.. and out... and back into labour. Morag (midwife) has a very hands off approach, encouraging me along the whole way, reminding me that I can do it.. even though I did loose confidence at times. I now feel that Morag has given me the strength to know that I can do this next pregnancy UP and UC all the way.
I had three children fairly quickly, all in 3 1/2 years. Then my husband decided the childbearing years were over and I complied, though I knew I wanted more. He had a vasectomy. For years after I cried every cycle. Then I got to nagging him to have it reversed, of course my nagging achieved it’s goal.. never. So, through the loving counsel of friends, I took my painful burden to the Lord and stopped nagging.. stopped talking about it completely. Then, about 6 months later, it came up again, and he said yes, he’d have it reversed. Well God taught us patience, as it took 1 year to complete that reversal and in God’s time and in God’s budget.
I was pregnant last winter, God blessed my womb, but again, I had the lesson to learn of trusting God’s plan for all His children. My baby’s days were few, he went back to heaven at 12 1/2 weeks gestation.
I don’t know why I ended up wanting a home birth, I don’t know how it happened. I know that not having Midwives around helped push me toward it, and not having hospitals around also helped. It makes you very independent to not be able to run to the Dr. easily. In Montreal there’s a walk in clinic on every block.. more clinic’s than churches almost. Living in Montreal, you don’t have to be independent.. everything you need is within reach. Out here in Saskatchewan, I can’t get a chocolate bar after 8:00pm without driving 30 minutes. In Saskatchewan you have to think ahead, you have to do your groceries a few weeks at a time, and have room to store them. You have to plan your errand days because you can’t just pop out for that missing item when you realize you’re missing it. And so it is with childbirth. You have to plan to be prepared to take care of yourself. Well I do at least. Everyone here thinks I’m nuts, but the Emergency Rescue Squad in town is trained to deliver babies.. and most of them have been delivering cows since they were twelve... I’ll be fine!
My dream is to give birth in front of the fireplace, with lots of pillows to rest on afterward. I hope it’s snowing. I’ve been getting the girl feeling.. but more than girl.. twins. My girlfriend says twin girls, I think one of each, hubby says just one please! OOH speaking of a fire in February, we’re going to have to collect fire wood in the next few weeks if we’re going to have wood for a February fire! You see we do most of our homeschooling in front of that big fire place.. It’s cozy!
Looking forward to February. Sombra
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Another thing that influenced my decision to birth at home was that Rourke had been born in 1 hour. The logistics are/were there is no way I could get someone here to take care of the kids, then get myself to a city hospital within an hour. And because I have lots of false labour at the end of a pregnancy, it takes time to figure out if "THIS IS IT" or if this is false labour again. Now Janney was born in 4 hours, I could have made it, but her birth was so beautiful right here at home. Now I love the whole unassisted homebirth dynamic, that the idea of heading to a hospital is loathsome to me. We Asher was born in hospital last time, I did suffer. The Dr. didn't do anything out of his ordinary, so I don't blame him, but it's that my paradigm has shifted and the idea of a hospital birth now is so invasive in comparison to Janney's unassisted home birth. After Asher was born, I relived the traumatizing birth over and over and over again, causing me 6 months of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. These were not happy blissful days of enjoying my newborn.
So, an unassisted birth is planned for this little one.
Header Banner photo - My ornamental crab apple tree in fresh bloom, in the middle of my circular driveway.~~~~
I am Sombra, and these are the stories from our house. We're a Messianic family where academics often take a back seat to the work and adventure of life.
