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I've written two posts on the worthiness and benefits of bringing children into adult worship service. If you haven't already read them, start here and then here. Here are a few tips for how to make the transistion to big church easier for your kids.
1. Seek your husband's wisdom on this issue
Your husband may have a different vision for your family than what I have laid out for you. If he isn't that keen on bringing kids into church, then don't attempt it. Pray for unity between you and your husband, and wait for God to move. If God changes your husband's mind, then come back here and finish reading. If the reason your husband doesn't want the kids in church is because they are unruly and poorly behaved, then work on their behavior during the day when he is gone. Honor him by giving him children that are well-behaved and fun to be around.
If he never changes his mind, that's okay. It doesn't make him a bad Christian. God just has something different planned for your family. Many times we women read something on the internet, decide its the way for our family to live and then get mad when our hubbies don't go along (ask me how I know.)
2. Prepare at home.
Other than seeking your husband's wisdom, this is the most crucial part. If your children aren't well-behaved at home, they won't be at church (ask me how I know.) Begin by training and teaching them how to obey mommy at home. You should only have one rule -obey mommy. You don't need a list of rules for your children to follow. They need to have a relationship with you that helps them to desire to obey you. For more info on general child training, go to the websites www.raisinggodlytomatoes.com or www.nogreaterjoy.org
3. Practice at home.
Set up church training sessions in your home. Get some uncomfortable chairs and a sermon on tv. Have the children learn to sit still for five minutes at a time. Lengthen the time, until they can handle a full 30 minute sermon. Teach older children to take notes and use their Bibles. Don't allow them to sit their like bumps on a log, teach them to engage in the sermon. For readers, make them a chart with words like "Jesus", "God", Love", "Sin" (whatever is applicable to the sermon) and let the put tally marks beside each word to count how many times the preacher says it. This is an easy way to get the to listen.
3. Bring one child in at a time.
It may be easier for some to go cold turkey and to pull all of their kids out of nursery and/or children's church. If that's the case for your family, then go for it. For us, we found the transition to be easier by working on one child at a time. Start with the oldest, and work your way down. Perhaps, set up an age when children begin to come to church. Make it young, like 2 or 3, rather than older. Some parents begin as babies, and that's totally okay, too. Hey, their your kids. I've just found that the period between 6 mos and 2 years is a bit more difficult to expect good behavior (ie, quietness) in church.
4. No distractions.
When we first started bringing our oldest into church (he's 9 and has been coming to big church for 4 years), we would bring coloring books and crayons. Well, after a few Sundays of having the crayons spill all over the floor taught us better. Now, we don't allow coloring books or toys. The children can have a Bible, and older one can have a pen and paper for note-taking.
5. Commitment.
This is hard. There may be Sundays when you take your child out five times to discipline him. Don't grow weary in doing good. Continue, and your child will get the message. Don't reward his misbehavior by taking him to 'play' in Sunday school or children's church.
There was one Sunday that I remember in particular that we had a special speaker. We were just at the beginning of bringing our 3yo (who has a more strong-willed personality than our oldest) to church. I remember almost choosing not to get him out of Sunday school that morning because I was tired and I really wanted to hear the speaker. Then God said "Is this an act of convenience or conviction?" I brought my son into church and he did so well. I remember feeling especially blessed that day for staying commited to the task we started.
God bless you on your journey to worship together as a family.
7:29 AM - May. 25, 2008 -
Untitled Comment
I cerealy LOL's when I read the uncomfy chairs part ... too good
gotta get of here tornado IOWA???
noahsmom - 9:04 PM - May. 25, 2008
Untitled Comment
this is Noahsmom ... I am home now ... the tornadic weather that went thru Iowa thankfully passed over us but some part of the state did get hit.
thanks for hoping we were ok
Anonymous - 10:26 PM - May. 26, 2008
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